+ Chapter 5: MOOOOM!

+ By: Lana.

+ Summary: Through some unfortunate series of events, Inu Yasha is seen as Tokyo's newest superhero. Oh dear.

+ Rating: PG-13. Well, I mean; duh. *rolls her eyes, while grinning*

+ Notes: Hello there! Yesss, I'm still continuing this story. Mwaha. Plus I had this nifty idea this morning that I just *had* to write - you'll see. I cracked up thinking about the possibilities. xD

On a side-note… Aw! My sister bought two incredibly adorable kittens! Ohh, I love them to death. :D

+ Disclaimer: Me no own Inu Yasha. Me no own the title either. Oh, phooey! *pouts*

"…" – speech.

'…' – thoughts.

*…* - sound effects.

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All was well in the Higurashi household. The birds were chirping their little lungs out; the sun was beaming down happily upon the shrine; Grandpa was selling some mumbo-jumbo shrine-souvenirs to some unsuspecting, innocent American tourists; Mom was humming softly to herself while doing the dishes… Yes, all was right in the world. That is, until suddenly a high-pitched yell rang out throughout the entire house, shaking its core. The neighbourhood froze and stopped dead in its tracks for a few seconds.

"MOOOOOOOOOOM!!! THEY'RE DOING IT AGAIN! THEY'RE DOING IT AGAIN ON TELEVISION!!"

The silence that followed was pierced by the shattering noise of a plate crashing onto the ground, followed by the shuffling of feet. The volume went up a few notches, until the voice of a reporter boomed through the living room, rattling the windows.

"Miss! Miss! Can you tell us your name please??!" came the hoarse voice of the aforementioned reporter; a short, pudgy man sporting a huge black moustache that concealed more than half of his face. Good thing too, since he didn't have any actual hair growing on top of his head.

"Err," came the reply of a very distressed Kagome; she was fidgeting nervously and her face was as red as a cherry. Behind her, you could see a grumbling and disgruntled-looking Inuyasha climb back on top of the roof. He looked positively horrified, mixed with a hint of annoyance. Kagome noted to herself that his face would compliment nicely with his bright-red fire-rat cloak at home.

"KAGOMEEEE!" he bellowed angrily, not sure what to do with the situation at hand. After all, it wasn't everyday Kagome suddenly ravished him and pushed him of a roof afterwards. Not that he'd mind, though¹.

Kagome cringed in terror upon hearing her name, but then regained her composure and turned around quickly; sparkling and beaming innocently at him. "Yeeess, Inuyasha?" she drawled, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. Inuyasha gave her a sceptical look.

"Cut the crap!" he barked, still a bit flushed. Kagome pouted, disappointed that her womanly charms had suddenly lost their 'touch' on him. Her face crumpled up in a cute frown and she folded her arms across her chest, huffing and glaring at our poor hanyou. The photographers went wild at such a cute pose and flashed their heads off. After a few seconds, Kagome was able to make the world stop spinning and regain her sight.

"Well, it wasn't my fault; I certainly didn't do it!" she snapped, anger flashing in her stormy grey eyes.

"What!? Are you saying that this is my fault? You're the one who practically ripped my clothes off and-"

"That's enough!" Kagome hissed, embarrassed beyond words. She eyed the eager reporters with distrust. "I'm not saying that this is your fault Inuyasha, though that tight spandex suit of yours isn't doing anything to help the situation. I just mean that it felt like someone, or something, took over my body and acted on its own!"

Inuyasha snorted and rolled his eyes at her. "Yeah, they call it hormones nowadays."

"Inuyashaaa!" our beloved miko-turned-heroine wailed, "I'm serious!"

Inuyasha grumbled, while waving his claw. "Yeah, yeah, alright, whatever. So what's your point?"

Kagome sighed warily, massaging her temples. A person could only take so much. "I'm just saying that there could be a different kind of youkai behind this, I mean it's not like-" she stopped in mid-sentence, her eyes growing to the size of saucers slowly. A loud *smack* echoed through the air.

"Pervert!" Kagome screeched, her face even redder than before. She was staring down at a twitching reporter on the ground, the imprint of her hand still quite visible on his cheek. Inuyasha eyed the man with a pondering look on his face.

"D'ya think he's related to Miroku?" he asked Kagome thoughtfully, rubbing his chin for added effect. Kagome coughed nervously, taking a step back towards Inuyasha.

"Uh, well, he could be. But I don't think that all of them are related to Miroku!" she yipped nervously, her hand gripping the fabric of Inuyasha's clothes (well, she tried. We all know how slippery spandex is, no? *winks*). Inuyasha glanced up from the suffering reporter curiously, just in time to see that all the men surrounding them were looking at his Kagome with a slightly perverted gleam in their eyes. He growled protectively and unsheathed the Tetsusaiga in the blink of an eye, pushing Kagome behind him in the process in one swift motion.

"Oi! What in the seven hells do you bastards think you're doing!?" he yelled, positioning the huge, blazing sword in front of him. He tsk-ed subconsciously; those men from the future had no class at all, just throwing themselves at every living, breathing girl that just so-happened to be there. He snorted. 'Buncha pervs…'

Kagome squeaked and glanced at the lustful reporters in front of them over Inuyasha's shoulder. Realisation slowly dawned on her as she watched the hungry look in their eyes. She sucked her breath in sharply, tugging on Inuyasha's hair none too softly for lack of sleeve

"Don't hurt them!" she whispered urgently, "I think they're under the same spell as I was!"

Inuyasha turned his head a bit to give her an odd look. "Wha-? But they're trying to -!"

"I KNOW! You don't have to spell it out for me! Just-just… you know; shake them up a little..!"

"Shake them up a little??" Inuyasha repeated incredulously. Kagome bonked him over the head, feeling a bit embarrassed.

"Just do it!" she hissed. Inuyasha cried out in annoyance and threw his hands up in the air (narrowingly missing a reporter's head with his sword; oops. ^^')

"Alright, alright!" muttering softly to himself, he sheathed the Tetsusaiga. 'Guess play-time is over…'

The possessed reporters took this as their cue and dog-piled Inuyasha, squashing him like a bug. Inuyasha actually felt sorry for all those times he squashed Myouga; he felt as flat as a pancake!

"Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled in alarm, gripping the handle of her bow more tightly. A feeling of hopelessness came over her.

Should she..?

No. They were innocent men!

Well, technically, yes, but that was her Inuyasha they were squashing there!

So? You squash him all the time with your 'Sit!'-command, you'd think by now he was used to lying in the dirt!

Kagome continued her internal struggle for a few seconds, until suddenly a voice spoke up next to her.

"Is that your boyfriend?" a low, masculine voice asked curiously.

Immediately, Kagome began to blush furiously. "N-no! I-I, he's just- we're just- there's NOTHING going on between us!" she stammered clumsily, fiddling with the bows on her bow (Err. You know what I mean). The man next to her chuckled politely.

"Now really?" he said, amusement clear in his voice. For some reason, the way he said it, it just sounded awfully familiar to Kagome…

She whipped her head up quickly and looked the stranger right in the eye. She gasped in astonishment, taking one step back.

"M-Miroku??" she asked, disbelieving. The man before her cocked his head to the side and blinked at her, puzzled.

"Who?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.  

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¹ - what Inuyasha didn't realise, was that he accidentally had given the reporters the answer to their earlier question. After all, Inuyasha didn't even know what they were there for in the first place! ^_^

Next chapter: Kagome and Inuyasha discover some startling revelations. Plus, Mom makes them take superhero-lessons! *gasp*

A/N: Hmm, I guess there's no youkai butt-kicking in this chapter… Oh well, we'll save that for later chapters! And man, for some reason I just couldn't write this chapter. I've probably rewritten it ten times, lol. I still don't like it. Sigh. Oh well, it'll do. I promise that I'll make the next chapter better; I've got some great ideas. :D