Unloved and Under Appreciated
"Thank you for having me on the show Ms Walters. Hello Wizarding Community. I suppose you are all wondering why I, Blaise Zambine, am here tonight. Well, it is because Barbara Walters was kind enough to let me tell my story to the world. I thought it was time to let people know the real me, the person about who so little is known. I am starting to think that I must be invisible or something. People walk right by me and don't even notice me talking to them. Even in fanfics people have issues with me. Sure, I may not be a member of the Dream Team, or even one of their precious Gryffindors, but it would be nice to get some recognition. But ironically enough, what hurts the most is not being left out, but being put in. 'But, why on Earth would that be bad?' You ask yourself, 'Don't you want to have a role in fanfics?' Well sure I want to have a role in fanfics, who wouldn't? The only problem is that the writers don't know me as well as they all think they do. Just this week alone, I have read 12 Harry Potter fanfics with me in them. In 4 of them, I was a girl. In 5, I was a guy. In 2, it didn't say which (I was nothing more than one of Draco's mindless drones), and in one (which I clicked on purely by accident) I was undecided and was gettin freaky with both Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger (more than once at the same time). I just want to state for the record, here tonight, that I am not like this. I have no strange sex fetishes, and I am not just a mindless drone. I am a person and I have feelings. Those fanfiction writers have no right to exploit me for their own pleasure. It is not fair, and the fact that nobody ever gets my gender right hurts deeply."
"So, Blaise, since this is 'for the record', would you mind answering that age old question that people have been asking since the first book? Are you a girl or a guy?"
"Arghhh!!!!"
~~~~~~`
Bad ending, yes I know that. Bad fic, yes I know that too. But I can't for the life of me remember if Blaise is a guy or girl, or for that matter, if it even says. But if people actually review, then I might be persuaded to write another even more horrible fic about how the world has just cast Crabbe and Goyle aside as Draco's brainless idiot cronies. ;)
