Trent lay in bed that night, moonlight beaming in through the open windows. Wrapped up in a blanket, with Linkin Park screaming out Easier to Run from the other side of the room, Trent sat and contemplated Lauren.
He seriously didn't know what to do. No woman had ever affected him so... much, nor so fast, and he had no idea how to deal with it. He wanted to yell at her, scream at her, kiss her... again, hug her; grab her hands... again.
He just didn't want to hurt her. Or her to hurt him. To leave him. Or to disappear, like the others had. They floated like ghosts at the back of his mind, Melanie still circulating through his thoughts. He had loved her, more than he had loved himself or anyone he had ever met. She was special, but it had taken her months to get to him, to finally touch his heart and to get him to accept and love her. When he had... when he had, he had been so glad that he had. Melanie, who was small of build with crazy red hair and Irish green eyes, had the most spirit of anyone he had ever met.
And no matter how much spirit and life she had in her, she had been snatched from him in a matter of seconds.
He couldn't... he couldn't accept that. She had loved him.
But it's not her fault she's dead. His conscious was starting to argue with him again.
Well, yes... But, I trusted her so completely, I put my life in her hands. I know it's not her fault, but she's gone and she took my life with her and left me and my body in tatters. Strips of a man. If I ever trust anyone that much again, and something happens or they just pick up and leave... I would kill myself. There's something wrong with me.
But if you take never take a chance, you'll never discover what you want. You'll never live more than you already have. You'll never know tenderness, love, anything you crave and need no matter how much you deny it, if you don't take a chance.
Trent closed his eyes and rested his head on the pillow and felt his head nestle right in with the feathers. His conscious was telling him to take a chance on her, no need to ask questions. There was something about her... and it drove him absolutely crazy.
If she really wants you, she'll fight to stay in your life. If she just gives up and doesn't push herself on you, her feelings, then she's not worth it.
But she's already fought a little... Trent thought, and he let his mind wander as he fell asleep, having no idea Lauren was having the same turmoil with herself.
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Lauren sat at her desk beside the window on the third floor of her house. Her feet clad in fuzzy blue slippers were crossed on the desk, and she squinted at the computer through the glare on her glasses. Her hair pinned back, a pencil behind her ear, Lauren could think of nothing but Trent. He was screwing up her college life, now. Damn, damn, damnit all!
Finally giving up, Lauren stood up and stretched in front of the window. Reaching up, she drew the heavy, white and baby blue silk curtains aside and looked at the city lights below her. She stuffed her hands in the pocket of the white sweater she was wearing and sighed.
How come he was affecting her so much? It honestly made no sense at all. None. Sure, she'd had sex before with a couple guys since she was a teenager, but this was MORE than just the burning sexual attraction she had felt for other men before. This was something... deeper, more... alive. She wanted a relationship with a man she knew she could never get close to unless she had some seriously awesome tactics for breaking the surface of his cool demeanor.
How come she had to fall for the quiet, brooding... overly handsome, weird men? There was no denying the weird part. Trent was interesting and had many secrets, a lot of them kept in the scars he had all over his body. How had he gotten those? Where did they come from? What happened to him? He was intriguing... Trenton Grey definitely was. With that rather expressionless, deep, smooth, quiet voice and hooded, secretive eyes, he was full of mystery. And usually that turned her off and made her want to run away screaming. Too complicated.
But now, physical attraction, simple chemistry were doing their works in her body and she hated it. She wished she could just shut off a valve and all thoughts and feelings for Trent would STOP. Make him go away.
But Jesus, he was weird... One minute, he had that crooked, half smile on his perfect face, and his gray eyes stared at her beneath those hooded, dark eyelinds, and others he looked like he wanted to slice her throat. His emotions were more complicated than a girl PMSing.
Huffing, Lauren took her black rimmed, square glasses off and walked over to her huge, mahagony slay bed and sat on the intricate blue and gold duvet cover. Setting her glasses on the elegent 1920's era mahagony nightstand she had picked up at an auction two years ago, Lauren lay back against the spread and stared at the planks of white washed wood that made up that corner of her room. She rolled over and looked at the white carpet covering the dark, shiny wood flooring and then sighed and buried her head in the covers.
Her life was complicated enough with college, work, her mother... But how much worse could it get if she added Trent to the mix? Well... she thought, as she reached over to turn the lamp off... We'll have to see.
The room went dark.
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He seriously didn't know what to do. No woman had ever affected him so... much, nor so fast, and he had no idea how to deal with it. He wanted to yell at her, scream at her, kiss her... again, hug her; grab her hands... again.
He just didn't want to hurt her. Or her to hurt him. To leave him. Or to disappear, like the others had. They floated like ghosts at the back of his mind, Melanie still circulating through his thoughts. He had loved her, more than he had loved himself or anyone he had ever met. She was special, but it had taken her months to get to him, to finally touch his heart and to get him to accept and love her. When he had... when he had, he had been so glad that he had. Melanie, who was small of build with crazy red hair and Irish green eyes, had the most spirit of anyone he had ever met.
And no matter how much spirit and life she had in her, she had been snatched from him in a matter of seconds.
He couldn't... he couldn't accept that. She had loved him.
But it's not her fault she's dead. His conscious was starting to argue with him again.
Well, yes... But, I trusted her so completely, I put my life in her hands. I know it's not her fault, but she's gone and she took my life with her and left me and my body in tatters. Strips of a man. If I ever trust anyone that much again, and something happens or they just pick up and leave... I would kill myself. There's something wrong with me.
But if you take never take a chance, you'll never discover what you want. You'll never live more than you already have. You'll never know tenderness, love, anything you crave and need no matter how much you deny it, if you don't take a chance.
Trent closed his eyes and rested his head on the pillow and felt his head nestle right in with the feathers. His conscious was telling him to take a chance on her, no need to ask questions. There was something about her... and it drove him absolutely crazy.
If she really wants you, she'll fight to stay in your life. If she just gives up and doesn't push herself on you, her feelings, then she's not worth it.
But she's already fought a little... Trent thought, and he let his mind wander as he fell asleep, having no idea Lauren was having the same turmoil with herself.
************************************************************************
Lauren sat at her desk beside the window on the third floor of her house. Her feet clad in fuzzy blue slippers were crossed on the desk, and she squinted at the computer through the glare on her glasses. Her hair pinned back, a pencil behind her ear, Lauren could think of nothing but Trent. He was screwing up her college life, now. Damn, damn, damnit all!
Finally giving up, Lauren stood up and stretched in front of the window. Reaching up, she drew the heavy, white and baby blue silk curtains aside and looked at the city lights below her. She stuffed her hands in the pocket of the white sweater she was wearing and sighed.
How come he was affecting her so much? It honestly made no sense at all. None. Sure, she'd had sex before with a couple guys since she was a teenager, but this was MORE than just the burning sexual attraction she had felt for other men before. This was something... deeper, more... alive. She wanted a relationship with a man she knew she could never get close to unless she had some seriously awesome tactics for breaking the surface of his cool demeanor.
How come she had to fall for the quiet, brooding... overly handsome, weird men? There was no denying the weird part. Trent was interesting and had many secrets, a lot of them kept in the scars he had all over his body. How had he gotten those? Where did they come from? What happened to him? He was intriguing... Trenton Grey definitely was. With that rather expressionless, deep, smooth, quiet voice and hooded, secretive eyes, he was full of mystery. And usually that turned her off and made her want to run away screaming. Too complicated.
But now, physical attraction, simple chemistry were doing their works in her body and she hated it. She wished she could just shut off a valve and all thoughts and feelings for Trent would STOP. Make him go away.
But Jesus, he was weird... One minute, he had that crooked, half smile on his perfect face, and his gray eyes stared at her beneath those hooded, dark eyelinds, and others he looked like he wanted to slice her throat. His emotions were more complicated than a girl PMSing.
Huffing, Lauren took her black rimmed, square glasses off and walked over to her huge, mahagony slay bed and sat on the intricate blue and gold duvet cover. Setting her glasses on the elegent 1920's era mahagony nightstand she had picked up at an auction two years ago, Lauren lay back against the spread and stared at the planks of white washed wood that made up that corner of her room. She rolled over and looked at the white carpet covering the dark, shiny wood flooring and then sighed and buried her head in the covers.
Her life was complicated enough with college, work, her mother... But how much worse could it get if she added Trent to the mix? Well... she thought, as she reached over to turn the lamp off... We'll have to see.
The room went dark.
************************************************************************
