Bearly Getting It
by
Cynthia "Sparky" Read

Chapter One

"I'm telling you, LP, these robberies don't make any sense." Drake checked his watch again. "Those valuables have been disappearing without a trace...Where is that dratted babysitter?"

"Oh Dad!" yelled Gosalyn, putting one hand over the phone's mouthpiece, "Gwen says she's got displaysia and can't come tonight!"

"D'oh!" Drake slapped his forehead. "That's the fourth babysitter this week who's chickened out on us!"

"Why don't you call Evelyn?" suggested Honker. "She's the only teenaged girl around who isn't afraid of Gosalyn."

Drake shook his head. "I tried her, she said I was" he paused, "tight-fisted."

"You are kinda cheap, Dad," Gosalyn piped in as she hung up the phone. "Besides, I hate Evelyn. She uses a cattle prod."

"I use a cattle prod, Gos." Drake frowned. "Great, no babysitter," he grumbled. "So now what do we do?"

Gosalyn and Honker looked hopefully at Drake and Launchpad.

"Oh, no!" shouted Drake. "Not again!"

"I don't see how much choice we have, DW," said Launchpad. "Besides, we'd better get out there before those robberies start again."

Drake rolled his eyes and opened a drawer. "Oh, all right." He pulled out his walletthe one with his Drake Mallard ID in itand put it next to the purple wallet in the drawer. "You two can come with us, but you have to stay in the Ratcatcher. Understood?"

Two children nodded their heads.

"All right then." Drake grabbed a wallet without looking and stuffed it in his pocket. "Let's get to the Tower."

o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o

"For the last time, you can not use the curtains to make pirate ship sails!" Evelyn was at the end of her rope. "If you must destroy the house, destroy the outside, okay?"

"Oh all right," sulked Wayne. He stalked outside.

Evelyn wrinkled her bill in disgust as the nine-year old boy retreated into the backyard. She hated babysitting! Especially obnoxious, squinty-eyed brats like Wayne Putlovtowski. Mentally exhausted, Evelyn flopped down on the Putlovtowski's expensive couch to simmer her brain on cartoons.

Much to her delight, her favorite cheesy Japanamation show, Samurai Goat, was just starting. The tern grabbed an open bag of potato chips off of the coffee table and started munching contentedly.

What a pitiful life, she thought. Fifteen years old, an Olympic-worthy diver, and way too intelligent to be stuck in public high school...It's a sad existence. She attempted to watch the fuzzy-looking characters on the TV screen (she had neglected to put in her contacts earlier). Kamikaze Kow was tying innocent little Geisha Gnu up to some sort of diabolical device, as she did every episode. Kamikaze doesn't look depressed, Evelyn thought to herself. The way she's cackling and rubbing her handser, hoovestogether indicates she's having a ball.

Evelyn frowned. Kamikaze was having a good time. Thoughtfully, the tern reached around to pull a faded newspaper clipping from a back pocket of her jeans. Megavolt, frozen in a smudged black-and-white photograph, waved cheerfully back at her as Darkwing held his Gas-Gun to his snout.

Megavolt. Evelyn sighed. Megavolt was just about the biggest hero in the world as far as the teenager was concerned. Not that she had a crush on himshe did, however, find him remarkable. He was much too intelligent not to turn to crime: that was Evelyn's theory. His talents would be wasted anywhere but on high felony. Just like me.

Just then, Wayne burst back into the house.

"We got a package!" he yelled shrilly, pouncing on the back of the couch and startling Evelyn into throwing the bag of chips into the air. "The man says you gotta sign for it!"

"Oh all right, keep your cork on your fork," grumbled Evelyn. She rolled to her feet and walked to the door. "I'm the babysitter," she explained to the deliveryman, signing the slip.

"My apologies," replied the deliveryman, watching Wayne bite a throw pillow in half.

Evelyn closed the door after accepting the plain brown-paper-wrapped box. "Wayne!" she yelled over the suddenly raised volume of Samurai Goat, "this thing is addressed to 'The children of Mr. and Mrs. Putlovtowski'. You seem to come closest to that description."

"Oh boy!" Wayne bounded forward and snatched up the box. He wasted no time in drilling to the contents, which he pulled out with a look of severe disappointment.

"Aw, its just a dumb ol' teddy bear," he complained. "I'm too old for baby toys. Now I'm bored."

Evelyn rolled her eyes. "Oh come on," she snapped. "Get a hobby."

"Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know," shrugged Evelyn. She had no problem with the fact that the boy disliked the bearshe didn't care for toys at all. "How about collecting stuff?"

All the while Wayne had been holding the bear and glowering at it disapprovingly. Suddenly, the boy, still clutching the bear, clomped off towards the back bedroom.

Good, thought Evelyn. Let him demolish his parents' roomit would serve them right for not sending Wayne to live with the wolves long ago.

Suddenly, Wayne bumped into her legs on his way to the front door.

"Hey, watch it!" she snapped, then noticed with surprise that the boy had an armful of his mother's expensive jewelry: gold tennis bracelets, strings of pearls, even what looked like one of Mr. Putlovtowski's gold watches.

"What are you doing?" she demanded, grabbing the bear and trying to pull it away from the boy. Wayne, unresisting, let her take the bear. Then he shoved past her without a word and took off down the street at a steady clomp.

Evelyn stared after him. Well, that was odd, she thought, then turned to the bear as if it might offer a solution to the mystery. Almost as if in response, the bear's large plastic eyes started to spin as soon as she looked into them. Evelyn blinked, suddenly grateful she wasn't wearing her contacts. She had begun to feel a strong urge to clean out the Putlovtowskis' cache of silverware. Evelyn gazed out the open door after the retreating Wayne.

What could be going on? This was entirely too weird to pass up, so Evelyn grabbed her duffel bagstuffing the bear insideand hurried down the street after Wayne towards the warehouse district.