Hi minna

Hi minna-chan!

I'm back again, another chapter. Sorry this one took so unbelievably long, but my computer froze in the fifth draft of this chapter, and I couldn't bring myself to write it all over again.

So, what happens in this chapter? The girls find the PERFECT festival, and the guys bellow their sorrows. Enjoy!

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Or e-mail: SSJ2Inochi@dbzmail.com

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Bulma sat quietly in front of her under ground computer system. This systems was rather old, but it was a special invention to Bulma. This machine could decode and encode notes, papers, books, all in all, it was a pretty handy tool. In this, a very special case, Bulma took liberty of using this priceless machine to decode the ancient book of the Saiya-jins, so she could finally know what it was the members of her husband's home planet did when they weren't pillaging and raping. She typed quickly, memorizing everything she saw as it flashed before her, disappearing as swiftly as it came.

The other four women stood in the room, huddling around her and trying desperately to see too, what their husband's ancestors (or in two cases, their ancestors) did in their free time. It would be interesting, would it not?

Bulma began to mumble softy as she typed, smiling and giggling every so often. This made the others suspicious. "Did you find something Bulma?" ChiChi asked, getting impatient.

Bulma blinked, then coughed into her hand, "No, I just have a songs stuck in my head," she grinned, "Oh, sandwiches are beautiful, sandwiches are fine. I love sandwiches, I eat them all the time! I eat them for my supper and I eat them for my lunch, and if I had a hundred I would eat them all at once!..."

The other women face faulted, turning their heads back to the screen. Bulma typed more, and eventually, she stopped, "Eureka!" she screamed, jumping to her feet, and standing up on her stair, "After an hour and half of searching," she paused to let them check the time, "and after thirty chapters, chapter after chapter about the men and their sexual escapades of the planet, I have found the Saiya-jin festival, to end all Saiya-jin festivals!"

Everyone blinked timidly at her, not having a clue as the what she was getting at.

"What festival?" Pan heard herself say, though she can't quite recall even thinking of that.

Bulma got a wicked grin on her face, one that would scare the shit out of anyone who hadn't known her for many, many years, "The festival of the dancing virgins!" she squealed, clapping her hand happily and jumping up and down.

And then, there was silence.

The title of the festival had caused many of the other women to blush. The festival of the dancing virgins? Didn't Bulma realize that none of them were virgins anymore? Bra desided to point that out to her mother, "Erm... mom?" she asked quietly, "you do realize that none of us are virgins, right?"

"Oh please," Bulma said putting on a stupid face and waving her hand at her daughter, "Of course I know that. ChiChi, Videl, and I couldn't have had you people if we had been virgins, and you guys are married,... you are getting some, right?"

Bra blushed madly, "MOTHER!"

Bulma laughed, "Besides, most of the women in the Saiya-jin race had been screwed by the age of eight. This goes along with all that mating and bonding mumbo jumbo. It was basically a test they preformed every year, to ensure that they were truly their mate's soul mate. Doesn't that sound fun?"

"What was it?!" Videl asking in alarm, "The men actually would lie about being their mate's mate?!"

Bulma sighed, and shook her head impatiently, "In case you didn't know Videl, not all the Saiya-jins are as teddy bear undied as your husband," she paused, "and to put this festival into more human terms, this was the female Saiya-jin's way of asking her mate, 'What kind of a slut do you take me for?!' The women on this planet had to kick a little ass every so often, so why not attack the male's favorite pastime?"

"So,... we don't let them fight?" ChiChi asked, how wonderful, her Goku would be home all the time!

"No," Bulma said, "actually, this festival may cause Goku to train and fight more. You see, the Saiya-jins loved to fight, it's true, but another thing they loved to do even more was..."

"Have sex!" Pan ended, grinning from ear to ear at her comprehension.

"Yup," Bulma said, "in their society, we would have all had a about as many kids as we've been with our husbands in years. But, anyway," she said grinning, "the first step we have to take is choosing a Queen of the festival," she noted," Ummmm... Pan, when was the last time you had sex?"

Pan looked at the ceiling as she thought, she couldn't quite remember... oh wait, now she did. That day a week before when Trunks got out of work early, came home, decorated their house, and scooped her up in his arms as soon as she got home. They did it several times that day, "Ummm... a couple of days..."

"Hmmm," Bulma said, looking at her paper. The Queen couldn't have had sex just a few days before, poor Pan, she'd just have to be one of the ceremonial attendees. Since Bra was a newly wed, there was no doubt she'd had sex recently, she was afraid to ask ChiChi, and she KNEW she wasn't valid in this game, "Guess you can't be queen. Videl when was the last time you had sex?"

Videl blushed, that was sure as hell a personal question! And Gohan's mother was right there in the room! "Bulma!" she said quickly, "I think that's a very personal question!"

Bulma sighed at her friend, "That long huh?"

Bulma's comment caused Videl to blush additionally. Okay, so maybe it hadn't been a few days ago like her daughter, but Trunks and Pan had only been married about a year... they could still hit the sheets every night if they wanted to!

"Well," Bulma said as she glanced at the papers again, "I guess we found our queen. Now, let's go over the rules..."

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"... No John! NOOO!"

"But Dana, you know I can't stay, I just... don't love you anymore!"

"You bastard!" Vegeta yelled at the television, "Why the hell would you leave her?! She loves you you asshole! Can't you see that?!"

"Yeah!" Trunks shouted, agreeing with his father, "She loves you dammit!"

The five Saiya-jin men had retreated to the living room after their wives had been gone for and hour. They had resorted to watching old Soap Operas on that new Soap Net channel. In this episode, Katie lost Devin's baby, but everyone thought it was Mike's. Mikes mother, Debra, had been secretly sleeping with John, her daughter's boyfriend and fiancé. So John had to leave Dana (Mike's mother Debra's daughter, only with a different husband). But know one knew, except for Katie, that John had gotten Dana pregnant.

"How could a man, screw a woman, get her pregnant, and leave her?" Goten asked with tears in his eyes. He blew his nose loudly, as realization hit the other three men in the room.

Four pairs of eyes wondered to Vegeta.

Vegeta was puzzled, "What?!" he thought a moment, "You think I fucked the woman than left?!" Vegeta asked them, as if he was hurt they'd even contemplate such a thing.

"Yes."

"Good," Vegeta replied, "just making sure we were all on the same page."

Before their conversation could ensue, the door to the basement opened, with four merry mothers stepping through. The men turned their heads and paled, praying that those sneaky looks on their faces weren't because of the 'Festival from Hell' as they'd dubbed it.

"Boys," Bulma said smiling, "we've come to our decision..."

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O.o! What will happen next?! No body knows, but me! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I enjoyed everyone's reviews for this story, I'm glad you've liked it so far, and I hope you continue to like it until I'm done, and if you don't I apologize in advance.

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Or, you can e-mail be at: SSJ2Inochi@dbzmail.com

Ja ne!

(Standard disclaimers)