The surface of the water was smooth.

The hand that held the glass was steady.

"Netto? Is something wrong?"

"No."

Nothing was wrong, and yet everything. But how could he begin to explain? How could he know where to start, where the story started in reality? In all honesty, for all he knew, this could have begun in those few days before the N-1 Grand Prix, or much later, directly following it. However you looked at it, thought, whenever you assumed it began, Netto's feelings towards a certain blue-eyed Net Battler had changed from admiration and general friendship to something he did not even want to think about.

"Are you sure? You don't look so good."

"I'm fine."

He stared past his mother's face at the wall, wanting to scream out that all was not 'fine', and it was all as far from 'fine' as it could get. Yet at the same time he kept pushing his emotions deeper and deeper within himself, trying to even deny them altogether, though he had learned long ago how hopeless that was.

The water's surface trembled slightly

The hand was clasped around the glass with a white-knuckled, too-tight grip, sending tremors through the clear plastic.

"You haven't talked to any of you friends lately, Netto. Did you have a fight?"

"No, mom."

"Good. And what about that nice white haired boy? I think he called this afternoon."

Small waves ruptured the crystal-smooth surface, some of the water lapping at the edges of the cup.

The hand around it trembled now too, partly from rage, partly from despair, and partly from the tightness of the grip.

"Enzan called?"

"Yes."

"What did he want?"

"He just wanted to talk. Maybe you should call him back."

The waves on the water smoothed out as the glass was put down on a table.

The hand slowly unwrapped itself from the smooth plastic.

"Okay, I'll go call him now."

"It's nearly eleven at night, he might be asleep, Netto."

"It's okay, Enzan never sleeps."

The water was perfectly smooth again.

The hand had long ago abandoned the clear plastic making up the glass, and was now quickly dialing a phone number.

"Ijuuin residence."

"May I speak to Enzan?"

"Who is this?"

"Hikari Netto."

There was some static at the other end of the phone.

"Netto?"

"Hello Enzan. You wanted to talk to me?"

"Yes. It's been a bit of a slow day and I needed someone to talk to."

"Oh."

The water's surface shook violently, a few droplets spilling out.

The hand was once again wrapped around the glass, clinging to it for dear life, sanity, or maybe both.

The mere sound of that smooth voice made the hair on the back of Netto's neck stand on end. It was nearly enough to break down all his mental defenses and force him to spill his guts over the pone. But he remained in control. He was too scared to face utter rejection. He was cowardly enough to keep himself in constant suffering rather that be hurt. As long as he kept quiet, the pain was his own fault, not Enzan's. Enzan need not ever know of the feeling harbored towards him by his friend and rival.

They spoke of trivial matters for just over an hour. The hand relaxed and some of the water was drunk.

"Well, goodnight Netto."

"Good night. And…"

"Yes?"

"…nothing. Good night."

Click. The phone was hung up on both sides.

He water shook violently as the hand grabbed it.

Crash.

The water trickled over the floor and the bits of shattered plastic.

"Netto! What was that?"

"Nothing, mom. I just dropped the glass."

He laughed a little, but he could feel the stinging at the back of his eyes. No. Once he cried over Enzan, there would be no more holding back. So he smiled through the pain, smiled through his inability to express such pure love, smiled even as his heart broke yet again.

The broken plastic had been removed and the water wiped away, but it was still there.

It was there just as Netto's pain was there, just as the scars he made on his soul every time he hung up without pouring out his soul were there.

One day, the tears would take the place of the tap water, but that was not now. It would be a long while before Hikari Netto allowed himself a single tear over Ijuuin Enzan.