sf stands for 'superfish'.

I can't understand why some people actually want this fic updated (aren't all of you scared off by the horror that is eefs already?!), but since there is demand, there shall be supply.

Let there be MSes~!

Chapter 2 : Return of the Nightmare!
Or : sf is going to get sued by Lucasfilms soon!

So....

Sanzo rode and rode and rode---

--wait, was he riding?

...no?...

...whoops.

So....

Sanzo ran and ran and ran, and because he had so much practice running from Mary Sues, he could theoretically run from one end of the earth to the other without stopping.

So can sf, actually, because the world is round. (In other words, running from one end to the other entails taking one step backwards.)

But anyway.

[I'm only updating this because I'm holding off from writing the next chapter of 'And Time Again' and I have a mad-bad-craving for Hazelnut Coffee that can't be sated for the want of Hazelnut Coffee and the wont of gastric.]

What? You mean the previous paragraph had nothing to do with the story? But I'm just showing the passage of time, see?

#Cut~!
#Take 2232...

So....

Sanzo ran and walked and ran and walked, and we shall not care about things like the lack of toilets on the way.

And eventually he reached MS-land, where eefs was kicking up a storm.

eefs : Why on earth did I bring this brat home? He's eating me out of house and home and he stinks! And he whines! And wails! Oh damnit...

And Sanzo had second thoughts. (And third and fourth and fifth.)

Sanzo : Why on earth did I run all the way here to rescue a brat I don't want anyway? Good riddance. Let them have each other.

And sf snuck up behind Sanzo and hit him -- hard -- with the Wand of OOCness.

sf : Sumimasen, Sanzo-sama.

And sf wandered off to write more Sanzo-abuse.

So Sanzo stood at the entrance of a great cave, where there were bats and things hanging from the walls.

...Walls...?

And then he realized that he'd been looking at the world funny, because someone (sf) had hit him too hard over the head and now he was on the floor. Then his view was filled with the none-too-appealing sight of eefs looming over head.

eefs was dressed entirely in black, down (or up) to the pointy hat that had wrinkle in it. And she pointed a black wand with a black star at the end and screamed "Turn into a frog!"

Sanzo rolled his eyes. In some ways, being a frog was preferable to being Sanzo-in-MS-land. Not that the curse worked, mind you. You need to wave the wand in a more suggestive fashion and chant pseudo latin. Xenopus transformus for example.

...Why, yes. Xenopus is the scientific name for frogs...

Sanzo : If I were you, I'd get out of the way quickly.

eefs : Why?

Sanzo : Because all the other MSes *nods at the approaching cloud on the horizon* are headed this way.

eefs was, if anything, not as stupid as fs, so she made good and disappeared in a cloud of black smoke. And Sanzo, being anything but stupid, latched onto her as she teleported away.

*eefs and Sanzo appear in another part of MS-land, collapsing in a heap.*

*The Muse pops up long enough to take incriminating photos, then runs as gun shots are heard*.

Sanzo : What the hell is it with your teleportation?
eefs : Yeah, what about it?
Sanzo : It sucks!
eefs : It works!

Sanzo rolls his eyes and stands up. They'd gone through a shift in tense by accident. They were no longer in the past, except sporadically, but they are still very tense. And the grammar got so bad that sf changes back to past.

(Now *that* took a bit of skill to write.)

And Sanzo says : I've found your secret hideout!
And eefs says : Hah! You can't have, because it's secret, and only I know where it is!
And Sanzo says : But I'm right here!
And eefs says : Hah, but you still don't know where you are, right?
And Sanzo says : Oh bugger, you're write.

Er...

'Right'.

And sf wondered how other fanfic authors manage to screw up their tenses so badly. It takes quite a lot of skill.

And eefs says : But nevermind because we're both in a cave and it's dark and people are bound to get hentai thoughts anyway.
And Sanzo, through sheer dint of effort, broke the Tezuka zone -- I mean -- broke the Bad-Tense zone, and said : Screw you!
And eefs says : But that's the idea!
And Sanzo said : Where is Sanzofs?

eefs paused. This wasn't the way it was supposed to go. She ran back to the library, which miraculously appeared when she needed it, and thumbed through the 'Getting a Sanzo for Mary Sues' handbook.

"Method number #634234," she read. "Drag him into a dark cave, against his will or otherwise, and seduce him."

She paused. The book had not been explicitly clear on what 'seduce him' entailed.

In the meantime...

...There was no meantime. Sanzo wandered off through the cave. He would have gotten lost, except that he was already lost. So he simply became more lost.

And sf lost interest in the fic and wandered off into the darkness.

To be continued...
*cue for thunder and evil laughter*