Emma's POV
Diary,
I'm kind of really depressed today. Today went pretty bad. No, not pretty bad, it went horrible. I guess you can pretty much tell a day is going to suck, when in the morning everything goes wrong.
This morning, my alarm never went off so I woke up an hour late, I couldn't find a clean pair of jeans that weren't wrinkles, I couldn't find matching socks. Mom takes me to school; I almost got in trouble for being late. I got to first period; I left all my books in Mom's car. So, of course no teacher really cares, and I get no positive points today for homework. Manny found out about Craig and me, and won't speak to me. Craig won't look me straight in the eye. Then during lunch, I sat on some "prank" which was a jelly container. No one told me until after I walked down the hallway wearing my white skirt with grape jelly on my butt.
So after I find someone with an extra pair of jeans in her locker, I go and find Sean. God, I think I'm going to cry just writing about it. It went HORRIBLE!
So I go up to Sean, he was sitting on the steps in front of the school. I stood there until he noticed me.
" Hi Sean." I said with half a smile.
" Is this the game you're playing?" He asked.
" What game?" I asked confused.
" Do all this shit to me and then come back as if we're friends?' Sean asked, he looked away from me.
"Sean, I came here to apologize." I offered.
" Cause that makes it all better." I heard Sean mumbled, I just ignored it and kept going on.
"I'm here to say I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed Craig, especially when you still have feelings for me." I said softly, and put my hand on his shoulder. Sean jumped away.
" Don't touch me." He warned. He started doing that hurt laugh again. "So, basically, I'm suppose to accept this apology? After all the apologies I gave you, I begged you to forgive me over an accident. You kiss Craig, and everything is all better again?"
" Do you hate me?" I asked. Sean out his head down for a few seconds and then ran his arm against his eyes.
" No, and you know what, I cant hate you no matter how hard I try." Sean said, I could tell he was breaking down. I didn't know what to do, but I felt my eyes stinging and water filling them.
" If you don't hate me, will you go out with me again?" I found myself asking. I was taken a back by what I had said myself. I could tell Sean was too.
" I don't hate you, I could never hate you Emma. But I'm not playing these mind games any longer; I'm through with this. And I'm through with you." Sean cried. It seemed as if no one was around any longer, and tears fell down Sean's face. "I'm out." He said and ran away. I started crying myself.
In fact, I'm sitting here crying now. How did I screw this all up so badly? I've realized, I may have a total crush on Craig, but I'm beginning to think its just lust. I have true, genuine feelings for Sean, but I've lost him. My genuine feelings don't mean anything any longer, because he doesn't have the same. What am I doing to do?
I guess the plan is for now, to hold my head up high and not care. It will be hard, but I'm becoming somebody I'm not, I don't like it.
Goodnight
Emma
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No comments really. I'm bored, but what else is new? Lol. School is out for break! YAY!
REVIEW REPLIES-
starlight4u- Eyy, in school and reviewing my story, that was very wrong. lol. But hey! I don't care! Hey, it is getting deep.wow, that's new for me. Lol. I know, poor Sean! I could kiss away his tears. Lol. Who knows if Craig and Sean fight? Hm..who knows? Hehe. Lol. I want some pixie dust!!!!!!!!!
XxArEULoStxX- Don't cry for him, that's my job! Lol! I don't know why I made him so sad, I must be evil! Lol.
JessicaLWriter- Yes! Emma the player! Cept, she wasn't really playing anyone because she's not dating anybody. Lol. Oh well, still, she can be a player! Of course Sean wont leave, my whole story would end. Lol. And he is way too hot. Actually, I'm not found of Jimmy, I like Sean, Craig, and Spinner!
Somegrlwhowrites- Thanks! I'm glad you like my story! I don't want Sean sad either! And sure, take Craig, but Sean will always be mine! Lol! Thanks again!
Anonymous Flamer- Hey, I actually appreciate your flame. I would have like constructive criticism, but if you hate it, that's cool. I think, it would have been nice for you to read the whole story instead of flaming the first chapter, but hey, if you want to be a flamer without a cause, be my guest! Thanks for your input!
Diary,
I'm kind of really depressed today. Today went pretty bad. No, not pretty bad, it went horrible. I guess you can pretty much tell a day is going to suck, when in the morning everything goes wrong.
This morning, my alarm never went off so I woke up an hour late, I couldn't find a clean pair of jeans that weren't wrinkles, I couldn't find matching socks. Mom takes me to school; I almost got in trouble for being late. I got to first period; I left all my books in Mom's car. So, of course no teacher really cares, and I get no positive points today for homework. Manny found out about Craig and me, and won't speak to me. Craig won't look me straight in the eye. Then during lunch, I sat on some "prank" which was a jelly container. No one told me until after I walked down the hallway wearing my white skirt with grape jelly on my butt.
So after I find someone with an extra pair of jeans in her locker, I go and find Sean. God, I think I'm going to cry just writing about it. It went HORRIBLE!
So I go up to Sean, he was sitting on the steps in front of the school. I stood there until he noticed me.
" Hi Sean." I said with half a smile.
" Is this the game you're playing?" He asked.
" What game?" I asked confused.
" Do all this shit to me and then come back as if we're friends?' Sean asked, he looked away from me.
"Sean, I came here to apologize." I offered.
" Cause that makes it all better." I heard Sean mumbled, I just ignored it and kept going on.
"I'm here to say I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed Craig, especially when you still have feelings for me." I said softly, and put my hand on his shoulder. Sean jumped away.
" Don't touch me." He warned. He started doing that hurt laugh again. "So, basically, I'm suppose to accept this apology? After all the apologies I gave you, I begged you to forgive me over an accident. You kiss Craig, and everything is all better again?"
" Do you hate me?" I asked. Sean out his head down for a few seconds and then ran his arm against his eyes.
" No, and you know what, I cant hate you no matter how hard I try." Sean said, I could tell he was breaking down. I didn't know what to do, but I felt my eyes stinging and water filling them.
" If you don't hate me, will you go out with me again?" I found myself asking. I was taken a back by what I had said myself. I could tell Sean was too.
" I don't hate you, I could never hate you Emma. But I'm not playing these mind games any longer; I'm through with this. And I'm through with you." Sean cried. It seemed as if no one was around any longer, and tears fell down Sean's face. "I'm out." He said and ran away. I started crying myself.
In fact, I'm sitting here crying now. How did I screw this all up so badly? I've realized, I may have a total crush on Craig, but I'm beginning to think its just lust. I have true, genuine feelings for Sean, but I've lost him. My genuine feelings don't mean anything any longer, because he doesn't have the same. What am I doing to do?
I guess the plan is for now, to hold my head up high and not care. It will be hard, but I'm becoming somebody I'm not, I don't like it.
Goodnight
Emma
|/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/|
No comments really. I'm bored, but what else is new? Lol. School is out for break! YAY!
REVIEW REPLIES-
starlight4u- Eyy, in school and reviewing my story, that was very wrong. lol. But hey! I don't care! Hey, it is getting deep.wow, that's new for me. Lol. I know, poor Sean! I could kiss away his tears. Lol. Who knows if Craig and Sean fight? Hm..who knows? Hehe. Lol. I want some pixie dust!!!!!!!!!
XxArEULoStxX- Don't cry for him, that's my job! Lol! I don't know why I made him so sad, I must be evil! Lol.
JessicaLWriter- Yes! Emma the player! Cept, she wasn't really playing anyone because she's not dating anybody. Lol. Oh well, still, she can be a player! Of course Sean wont leave, my whole story would end. Lol. And he is way too hot. Actually, I'm not found of Jimmy, I like Sean, Craig, and Spinner!
Somegrlwhowrites- Thanks! I'm glad you like my story! I don't want Sean sad either! And sure, take Craig, but Sean will always be mine! Lol! Thanks again!
Anonymous Flamer- Hey, I actually appreciate your flame. I would have like constructive criticism, but if you hate it, that's cool. I think, it would have been nice for you to read the whole story instead of flaming the first chapter, but hey, if you want to be a flamer without a cause, be my guest! Thanks for your input!
