You asked for it, so here it is! Season III: Whose Triforce is it
anyways! Um. read my serious fanfiction too!!! Sorry about the great big
delay! I've been gone for about 3 weeks with a camp. For the few who may
actually have read "Phantoms of Echoes" chapters 4 and 5 will up within the
next few days I hope.
- ^_^ Whose Triforce is it Anyways?
*music comes on as the camera fades into focus. In a dark room, 3 spotlights narrow in on a lone figure sitting in the middle of the audience. But as their face lights up, it isn't Marin who is standing there. it's your favorite character from Majora's Mask!*
Link: MYSTIC!!!!!! NO!!!!!
Mystic: *turns on the lights, no one else knows who the person is* What's wrong, this person is perfect!
Link: No way!!! You can't be serious!?
Mystic: Come on! It's perfect, no more gay jokes for you, no more Rauru. and since I don't have a game boy, no pulling a character's personality like Marin's out of my a..
Ganon: Don't you start that too!
Ruto: *still in the audience* Wait. why no more gay jokes?
Mystic: because you'll all have a new focus!
Zelda: Some is worse than Link?
All: WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Link: It's true!
Mystic: Oh let's just get this started!
Link: But Mystic..
Mystic: Start the fic over! Now!
Whose Triforce is it Anyways?
*music comes on as the camera fades into focus. In a dark room, 3 spotlights narrow in on a lone figure sitting in the middle of the audience. But as their face lights up, it isn't Marin who is standing there. it's your favorite character from Majora's Mask!*
Link: *grumble* how could you do this to me.
New host guy: hee hee hee. welcome to Whose Triforce is it anyways! I'm your new host for the show! I moved here from swamps just to host this show! And make some extra money. maps don't sell well these days since my main customer moved back to his old home!
Link: I had to go back! I was only in Termina because that damn Skull kid stole my ocarina!
Zelda: you mean MY ocarina!
Link: hey, you gave it to me, remember?
Zelda: and you just HAD to get it stolen, didn't you?
Link: well if you wouldn't have butted in, in the first place, and given me the stupid thing again, this wouldn't have been a problem.
Zelda: it wouldn't be a "Legend of Zelda" game if I wasn't in it!
Link: What do you call the second title for the original Nintendo? It had MY name on it!
Zelda: a mistake!
Link: I didn't need your stupid ocarina anyways! I could have defeated the skull kid on my own!
Zelda: with what? Your hollow head?
Nabooru: Hey!! Stop it, both you kids! This is all Gannondorf's fault!
Ganon: MY fault? What did I ever do??
All: Do we have to answer that?
Ganon: *sinks back into his chair* good point.
New host: Annnyways! It's time to get started! Here tonight are the Goddesses' favorite scapegoat, Zelda! The Goddesses' favorite slave, Link! The Goddesses' favorite to kill, Gannondorf! And the Goddesses' favorite playboy playmate, Nabooru! I'm your host, Tingle! Tee hee hee, let's go!
All cept Link: TINGLE???
Link: see what I was talking about?
Zelda: It's horrible.
Ganon: It's evil.
Nabooru: It's a middle-aged man dressed like a fairy wanna-be..
All: NEW HOST OR WE BOYCOTT!!!!
Mystic: You guys can't boycott because I'm THE author!
All: LIKE HELL WE CAN!!!!
*suddenly the lights go black again, all the laughing and the music stop and the entire area is like the center of a black hole, nothing*
Mystic: How did you do that.?
All: NEW HOST NOW!
Mystic: fine. fine. you guys win. for now.
*lights come back on and Tingle is gone, in replace of him is Ruto*
Link: Ruto???
Mystic: Hey, it's last minute! Now get going, we DO have a time limit you know! The Fox network only gives us so long!
Zelda: Did it ever occur to you that ABC might treat us better? Look what they did for Who Wants to be a Millionaire!
Mystic: They're owned by Disney.
Zelda: So?
Mystic: Could you go one episode without calling Link gay or saying that Gannondorf is a big di.
Ganon: What was that???
Link: *grumbles* like it matters. anyone who says it gets cut off by someone else. usually Gannondorf.
Zelda: I see. *gets out a cheerleading outfit and pom poms* Let's go Fox Network!
Mystic: That's more like it! Now get started! Let's try this one more time, starting after the introductions. at least Tingle did that right.
*a rushed version of the music comes out and Ruto plops down in the chair, tries out the buzzer a quick couple of times, then smiles at the contestants*
Ruto: Welcome to Whose Triforce is it Anyways, if you haven't seen the show before here's how it goes. I'll give them a game and some rules and they have to improvise everything on the spot. What makes this worse is these guys aren't professionals at all. At the end of the games, I give out points to appoint the winner at the end! Hey that was pretty funny, points to appoint!
Zelda: Get over yourself you aquatic freak.
Ruto: Damn you royal bitch.
Zelda: Playboy bunny!
Nabooru: I thought that was me?
Ruto: Sage of time's end!
Nabooru: I mean Tingle DID say I was the Goddesses' favorite
Zelda: Sage of dirty water!
Nabooru: I guess he was joking but I do kinda like the name!
Ruto: Whore!
Zelda: Slut!
Ruto: Attracted to young ten-year-olds with small di.
Link: Hey! I'm not THAT small down there!
Zelda: How come she gets all the good comebacks. that really hurt Ruto.
Ganon: Because you're a blonde?
All: *wide-eyed, looks at Gannondorf*
Link: did Gannondorf.
Nabooru: Make a comeback.?
Mystic: WOULD YOU GUYS START ALREADY!!!!
Ruto: *quivering* Our first game is Superheroes! Link will come down and be a super hero based on what our gracious audience says.
*Link steps down in the front of the audience and takes a bow*
Ruto: He'll be trying to save the world from an unusual crisis with the help of his 3 superfriends: Nabooru, Gannondorf, and Zelda. They will name each other as they enter. Now, audience, what are we gonna name Link?
Darunia: Big Bro man!
Ruto: lame.
Saria: Hero of time!
Ruto: really lame.
Malon: Powerpuff girl wanna-be!
Ruto: hmm. not bad! Okay Link, you're the powerpuff girl wanna-be!
Link: *grumble grumble*
Ruto: *picks up a card* And the crisis is. ha. Majora's mask has been re- released by Nintendo for the gamecube but it has the graphics capacity of the original Nintendo.
Zelda: is that possible? On the gamecube?
Ganon: Can't it be a game that I'm in?
Nabooru: I could say the same thing!
Link: oh man. I don't wanna look that short again.
Ruto: Stop complaining you guys! Start!
Link: *acting like a little girl* Oh my god! It's almost my bedtime! I hope the professor doesn't catch me up this late at night! *makes a little phone ringing sound* The phone! It must be the mayor of townsville wanting MY help! *pretends to answer the phone* Mayor!? Miss Bellum?! MOM?! I told you never to call this line! This is the townsville phone! What? They released Majora's mask on Gamecube! Finally! They see the genius of the game! What was that? Its in original Nintendo form!? NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I have to find something to do about this crisis or the people of townsville will be stupefied beyond imagination!
*Zelda jumps into the screen, glaring at Link*
Zelda: I got here as soon as I could, powerpuff-wannabe!
Link: Thank the goddesses you're here, Super sensitive hearing girl!
Zelda: *holds her ears* AAAAAHHHHH! Could you whisper or something???
Link: *whispering* no time for formalities, they've released Majora's mask with original Nintendo graphics!
Zelda: that's horrible, what are we gonna do?
Link: we'll be washed up. finished. dead. doing "advance" games for the gba for the rest of our lives!!
Zelda: *yelling* Link! Stay in character! *eyes widen, attempts to hold her ears again and groans* I . uh . mean. whatever! We need to do something!
*Gannondorf jumps in looking all proud*
Ganon: I hope I'm not late!
Zelda: *whispering* Can you tone it down a bit, Captain Hug-a-lot!
Ganon: *growls at Zelda, then goes over to her and gives her a bear hug, gritting his teeth* Of course!
Link: Captain Hug-a-lot, they've made a Majora's mask for Gamecube in the original Nintendo graphics!
Ganon: Who cares? *goes over and hugs Link really, really hard* I'm not in it!
Ruto: *beep, beep* Stay in character!
Ganon: Hey, do you see a Captain Hug-a-lot in Majora's mask? I don't think so.
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep* Just get back to the game.
Link: *gasping for air* I do! Townsville does! Oh man. its almost my bed time. I can't save the world after bedtime!
Zelda: *holding her ears* please, please tone it down!!!
Ganon: *releases Link and goes over and squeezes Zelda, whispering* No problem!
Zelda: *gasping for air* thanks.
*Nabooru jumps in, excitedly*
Nabooru: I'm finally here!
Ganon: Great! We need the help Boneless wonder!
*Nabooru collapses to the ground and starts slithering towards the center of the screen*
Nabooru: What happened now?
Link: They've made a Majora's mask for Gamecube in the original Nintendo graphics!
Nabooru: It's not like anyone would buy it even if the graphics were better!
Link: It's not THAT bad!!!
All: YES IT IS!!!!
*Gannondorf cletches onto Nabooru and shakes her while hugging*
Link: *grumble, grumble, grumble*
*Gannondorf moves and holds onto Link again*
Nabooru: Just don't worry about it! People are rioting that Nintendo is wasting their time on it! It won't sell!
*Nabooru starts slithering out, then she gets sick of it and just stands up and skips off stage*
Ganon: She's right! If Gannondorf Dragmire isn't in the game, people won't like it!
*Gannondorf walks off too*
Zelda: The princess only makes one appearance anyways, so it can't be good!
*Zelda walks off stage*
Link: I guess its my bedtime now, I hope mojo jojo doesn't try anything tonight.
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep* Very nice guys! I couldn't of done better myself. wait. yes I could have!
*everyone takes a seat in their chair*
Zelda: oh get over yourself!
Ruto: Shut up, Ganon-lover!
Zelda: oh yeah? Well your father is a Lord Jabu-Jabu wanna be!
Ruto: yeah? Well your dad screwed Kotake and Koume to get you!
Nabooru: *hits Zelda upside the head* don't even make a comeback! I want to get this over with!
Zelda: Aw. but I had a really good one too!
*Ruto opens her mouth and gets ready to insult her again*
Nabooru: You neither, else we'll bring out Darunia and Saria again and you guys will wear neck braces until the end of the show!
Ruto: ugh. Okay, Link. negative 10,000 points since you like Majora's mask, Gannondorf, I'll give you 500 for not killing Link. you should of killed Zelda!
Nabooru: Ruto!
Ruto: Sorry. Nabooru, how about 50,000?
Nabooru: Not bad.
Ruto: and Zelda. like I'd give you points anyways!
Nabooru: Ruto!
Ruto: ah. one point then! Next game! The Irish Drinking Song! Everyone step up! Audience, I need a situation that's never likely to happen in any of these guys life!
Impa: Sex?
All: VERY funny Impa.
Romani: Seeing aliens!
Malon: Sex!
Ruto: No sex!
Anju: How about just going on a date?
Ruto: That works! Okay guys, the irish drinking song with music by our resident musician, Saria!
Saria: *bows her head and begins playing the song on an ocarina*
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Link: I want to go on a date
Zelda: with a really hot guy.
Ganon: but they'll never go out with me
Nabooru: my whole life is a lie.
Link: so I'll get dressed up all nice
Zelda: And go out really far
Ganon: um.. I don't wanna catch lice?
Nabooru: going to a gay bar!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Zelda: I went inside the bar
Ganon: where everyone was straight
Nabooru: someone then approached me
Link: and told me I was great!
Zelda: we danced the night away
Ganon: and went up to a room
Nabooru: took off all of our clothes!
Link: everyone could hear the booms!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Ganon: when it was over
Nabooru: 15 minutes later
Link: I was totally finished
Zelda: and he was really wasted!
Ganon: we went back downstairs
Nabooru: to get a quick looker
Link: she drained all my money
Zelda: I didn't know he was a hooker!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Nabooru: Now I'm out of cash
Link: and I'm really really tired
Zelda: I can't believe he did this
Ganon: it really burns my fire
Nabooru: It wasn't really that good
Link: I should of gotten it for free
Ganon: now I see why it was.
Zelda: they were really a he/she!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i! OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy iiiiidddy. iiiidddyyy. iiiiiii!
*audience starts clapping and they go back and sit down*
Ruto: okay. that was. off subject a little. Figures you guys would get to sex! Anyways, all of your points double for that! So you guys should know where you stand!
All: *blank stares*
Ruto: Ah. nevermind! Time for the last game of the night, you asked for it, Hyrule's worst!
*everyone comes down on the stair and they stand in a line*
Ruto: Everyone already knows what this is so, let's just get it over with! Hyrule's worst. oh great. Zelda characters!
*everyone steps down and starts pointing to each other*
Ruto: *beep, beep* we get the point.
*they step back up, but then everyone steps down and points at Ruto*
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep, beep, beep* NOT funny!
Link: Tingle!!!
Zelda: um. yeah he's right, Tingle!
Nabooru: The phantom ganon in the forest temple. man that guy was easy!
Ganon: and kotake and koume weren't?
Nabooru: they were hard!
Link: no they weren't, I thought you were stronger than that to get captured by them!
Nabooru: Hey! You just stood on a ledge and watched!
Link: What did you want me to do? Jump to my doom? It was really high!
Nabooru: hmph. some hero of time!
Ruto: um. next category. Hyrule's worst monster enemies!
Link: the very first one in ocarina of time. man that thing was too easy!
Ganon: hey! It killed the Deku tree, didn't it?
*beep*
Zelda, Link, Nabooru: GANNONDORF!
Ganon: I'm not a monster!
All: YES YOU ARE!
*beep*
Ruto: I was waiting for that!
Zelda: Majora's mask. it's a mask! And if you have the fierce deity's mask, its TOO easy!
*beep*
Ruto: Hyrule's worst pointless places.
Nabooru: Hyrule Castle!
Zelda: Wha, wha, what!?
*beep*
Ganon: the mask shop. there should be a male Gerudo mask too!
*beep*
Link: the bombchu shop!
Zelda: Gerudo's fortress!
Nabooru: why you little.
*Nabooru tackles Zelda and the too start brawling on the ground*
Ruto: Hey! Hey! Why couldn't I do that.. *Ruto jumps in and tries and helps Nabooru out*
*the entangled three continue duking it out on the floor, Link and Ganon start whooping and cheering for them*
Zelda: remember! I'm in super smash bros melee!
Nabooru: OUCH! Yeah, and you're no good at fighting unless you cross- dress!
Ruto: shut up and get her Nabooru!
Nabooru: Don't tell me what to do, you ugly fish!
Ruto: WHAT? That's it!
*Ruto starts after Nabooru now and the three continue to hurt each other, Darunia runs up in front of them on the stage with a Microphone in his hand and tries to ignore them*
Darunia: That's all for this editon, remember what Mystic says. reviews equals more editions! No points, no winner, no special game! Bye bye!
- ^_^ Whose Triforce is it Anyways?
*music comes on as the camera fades into focus. In a dark room, 3 spotlights narrow in on a lone figure sitting in the middle of the audience. But as their face lights up, it isn't Marin who is standing there. it's your favorite character from Majora's Mask!*
Link: MYSTIC!!!!!! NO!!!!!
Mystic: *turns on the lights, no one else knows who the person is* What's wrong, this person is perfect!
Link: No way!!! You can't be serious!?
Mystic: Come on! It's perfect, no more gay jokes for you, no more Rauru. and since I don't have a game boy, no pulling a character's personality like Marin's out of my a..
Ganon: Don't you start that too!
Ruto: *still in the audience* Wait. why no more gay jokes?
Mystic: because you'll all have a new focus!
Zelda: Some is worse than Link?
All: WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Link: It's true!
Mystic: Oh let's just get this started!
Link: But Mystic..
Mystic: Start the fic over! Now!
Whose Triforce is it Anyways?
*music comes on as the camera fades into focus. In a dark room, 3 spotlights narrow in on a lone figure sitting in the middle of the audience. But as their face lights up, it isn't Marin who is standing there. it's your favorite character from Majora's Mask!*
Link: *grumble* how could you do this to me.
New host guy: hee hee hee. welcome to Whose Triforce is it anyways! I'm your new host for the show! I moved here from swamps just to host this show! And make some extra money. maps don't sell well these days since my main customer moved back to his old home!
Link: I had to go back! I was only in Termina because that damn Skull kid stole my ocarina!
Zelda: you mean MY ocarina!
Link: hey, you gave it to me, remember?
Zelda: and you just HAD to get it stolen, didn't you?
Link: well if you wouldn't have butted in, in the first place, and given me the stupid thing again, this wouldn't have been a problem.
Zelda: it wouldn't be a "Legend of Zelda" game if I wasn't in it!
Link: What do you call the second title for the original Nintendo? It had MY name on it!
Zelda: a mistake!
Link: I didn't need your stupid ocarina anyways! I could have defeated the skull kid on my own!
Zelda: with what? Your hollow head?
Nabooru: Hey!! Stop it, both you kids! This is all Gannondorf's fault!
Ganon: MY fault? What did I ever do??
All: Do we have to answer that?
Ganon: *sinks back into his chair* good point.
New host: Annnyways! It's time to get started! Here tonight are the Goddesses' favorite scapegoat, Zelda! The Goddesses' favorite slave, Link! The Goddesses' favorite to kill, Gannondorf! And the Goddesses' favorite playboy playmate, Nabooru! I'm your host, Tingle! Tee hee hee, let's go!
All cept Link: TINGLE???
Link: see what I was talking about?
Zelda: It's horrible.
Ganon: It's evil.
Nabooru: It's a middle-aged man dressed like a fairy wanna-be..
All: NEW HOST OR WE BOYCOTT!!!!
Mystic: You guys can't boycott because I'm THE author!
All: LIKE HELL WE CAN!!!!
*suddenly the lights go black again, all the laughing and the music stop and the entire area is like the center of a black hole, nothing*
Mystic: How did you do that.?
All: NEW HOST NOW!
Mystic: fine. fine. you guys win. for now.
*lights come back on and Tingle is gone, in replace of him is Ruto*
Link: Ruto???
Mystic: Hey, it's last minute! Now get going, we DO have a time limit you know! The Fox network only gives us so long!
Zelda: Did it ever occur to you that ABC might treat us better? Look what they did for Who Wants to be a Millionaire!
Mystic: They're owned by Disney.
Zelda: So?
Mystic: Could you go one episode without calling Link gay or saying that Gannondorf is a big di.
Ganon: What was that???
Link: *grumbles* like it matters. anyone who says it gets cut off by someone else. usually Gannondorf.
Zelda: I see. *gets out a cheerleading outfit and pom poms* Let's go Fox Network!
Mystic: That's more like it! Now get started! Let's try this one more time, starting after the introductions. at least Tingle did that right.
*a rushed version of the music comes out and Ruto plops down in the chair, tries out the buzzer a quick couple of times, then smiles at the contestants*
Ruto: Welcome to Whose Triforce is it Anyways, if you haven't seen the show before here's how it goes. I'll give them a game and some rules and they have to improvise everything on the spot. What makes this worse is these guys aren't professionals at all. At the end of the games, I give out points to appoint the winner at the end! Hey that was pretty funny, points to appoint!
Zelda: Get over yourself you aquatic freak.
Ruto: Damn you royal bitch.
Zelda: Playboy bunny!
Nabooru: I thought that was me?
Ruto: Sage of time's end!
Nabooru: I mean Tingle DID say I was the Goddesses' favorite
Zelda: Sage of dirty water!
Nabooru: I guess he was joking but I do kinda like the name!
Ruto: Whore!
Zelda: Slut!
Ruto: Attracted to young ten-year-olds with small di.
Link: Hey! I'm not THAT small down there!
Zelda: How come she gets all the good comebacks. that really hurt Ruto.
Ganon: Because you're a blonde?
All: *wide-eyed, looks at Gannondorf*
Link: did Gannondorf.
Nabooru: Make a comeback.?
Mystic: WOULD YOU GUYS START ALREADY!!!!
Ruto: *quivering* Our first game is Superheroes! Link will come down and be a super hero based on what our gracious audience says.
*Link steps down in the front of the audience and takes a bow*
Ruto: He'll be trying to save the world from an unusual crisis with the help of his 3 superfriends: Nabooru, Gannondorf, and Zelda. They will name each other as they enter. Now, audience, what are we gonna name Link?
Darunia: Big Bro man!
Ruto: lame.
Saria: Hero of time!
Ruto: really lame.
Malon: Powerpuff girl wanna-be!
Ruto: hmm. not bad! Okay Link, you're the powerpuff girl wanna-be!
Link: *grumble grumble*
Ruto: *picks up a card* And the crisis is. ha. Majora's mask has been re- released by Nintendo for the gamecube but it has the graphics capacity of the original Nintendo.
Zelda: is that possible? On the gamecube?
Ganon: Can't it be a game that I'm in?
Nabooru: I could say the same thing!
Link: oh man. I don't wanna look that short again.
Ruto: Stop complaining you guys! Start!
Link: *acting like a little girl* Oh my god! It's almost my bedtime! I hope the professor doesn't catch me up this late at night! *makes a little phone ringing sound* The phone! It must be the mayor of townsville wanting MY help! *pretends to answer the phone* Mayor!? Miss Bellum?! MOM?! I told you never to call this line! This is the townsville phone! What? They released Majora's mask on Gamecube! Finally! They see the genius of the game! What was that? Its in original Nintendo form!? NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I have to find something to do about this crisis or the people of townsville will be stupefied beyond imagination!
*Zelda jumps into the screen, glaring at Link*
Zelda: I got here as soon as I could, powerpuff-wannabe!
Link: Thank the goddesses you're here, Super sensitive hearing girl!
Zelda: *holds her ears* AAAAAHHHHH! Could you whisper or something???
Link: *whispering* no time for formalities, they've released Majora's mask with original Nintendo graphics!
Zelda: that's horrible, what are we gonna do?
Link: we'll be washed up. finished. dead. doing "advance" games for the gba for the rest of our lives!!
Zelda: *yelling* Link! Stay in character! *eyes widen, attempts to hold her ears again and groans* I . uh . mean. whatever! We need to do something!
*Gannondorf jumps in looking all proud*
Ganon: I hope I'm not late!
Zelda: *whispering* Can you tone it down a bit, Captain Hug-a-lot!
Ganon: *growls at Zelda, then goes over to her and gives her a bear hug, gritting his teeth* Of course!
Link: Captain Hug-a-lot, they've made a Majora's mask for Gamecube in the original Nintendo graphics!
Ganon: Who cares? *goes over and hugs Link really, really hard* I'm not in it!
Ruto: *beep, beep* Stay in character!
Ganon: Hey, do you see a Captain Hug-a-lot in Majora's mask? I don't think so.
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep* Just get back to the game.
Link: *gasping for air* I do! Townsville does! Oh man. its almost my bed time. I can't save the world after bedtime!
Zelda: *holding her ears* please, please tone it down!!!
Ganon: *releases Link and goes over and squeezes Zelda, whispering* No problem!
Zelda: *gasping for air* thanks.
*Nabooru jumps in, excitedly*
Nabooru: I'm finally here!
Ganon: Great! We need the help Boneless wonder!
*Nabooru collapses to the ground and starts slithering towards the center of the screen*
Nabooru: What happened now?
Link: They've made a Majora's mask for Gamecube in the original Nintendo graphics!
Nabooru: It's not like anyone would buy it even if the graphics were better!
Link: It's not THAT bad!!!
All: YES IT IS!!!!
*Gannondorf cletches onto Nabooru and shakes her while hugging*
Link: *grumble, grumble, grumble*
*Gannondorf moves and holds onto Link again*
Nabooru: Just don't worry about it! People are rioting that Nintendo is wasting their time on it! It won't sell!
*Nabooru starts slithering out, then she gets sick of it and just stands up and skips off stage*
Ganon: She's right! If Gannondorf Dragmire isn't in the game, people won't like it!
*Gannondorf walks off too*
Zelda: The princess only makes one appearance anyways, so it can't be good!
*Zelda walks off stage*
Link: I guess its my bedtime now, I hope mojo jojo doesn't try anything tonight.
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep* Very nice guys! I couldn't of done better myself. wait. yes I could have!
*everyone takes a seat in their chair*
Zelda: oh get over yourself!
Ruto: Shut up, Ganon-lover!
Zelda: oh yeah? Well your father is a Lord Jabu-Jabu wanna be!
Ruto: yeah? Well your dad screwed Kotake and Koume to get you!
Nabooru: *hits Zelda upside the head* don't even make a comeback! I want to get this over with!
Zelda: Aw. but I had a really good one too!
*Ruto opens her mouth and gets ready to insult her again*
Nabooru: You neither, else we'll bring out Darunia and Saria again and you guys will wear neck braces until the end of the show!
Ruto: ugh. Okay, Link. negative 10,000 points since you like Majora's mask, Gannondorf, I'll give you 500 for not killing Link. you should of killed Zelda!
Nabooru: Ruto!
Ruto: Sorry. Nabooru, how about 50,000?
Nabooru: Not bad.
Ruto: and Zelda. like I'd give you points anyways!
Nabooru: Ruto!
Ruto: ah. one point then! Next game! The Irish Drinking Song! Everyone step up! Audience, I need a situation that's never likely to happen in any of these guys life!
Impa: Sex?
All: VERY funny Impa.
Romani: Seeing aliens!
Malon: Sex!
Ruto: No sex!
Anju: How about just going on a date?
Ruto: That works! Okay guys, the irish drinking song with music by our resident musician, Saria!
Saria: *bows her head and begins playing the song on an ocarina*
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Link: I want to go on a date
Zelda: with a really hot guy.
Ganon: but they'll never go out with me
Nabooru: my whole life is a lie.
Link: so I'll get dressed up all nice
Zelda: And go out really far
Ganon: um.. I don't wanna catch lice?
Nabooru: going to a gay bar!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Zelda: I went inside the bar
Ganon: where everyone was straight
Nabooru: someone then approached me
Link: and told me I was great!
Zelda: we danced the night away
Ganon: and went up to a room
Nabooru: took off all of our clothes!
Link: everyone could hear the booms!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Ganon: when it was over
Nabooru: 15 minutes later
Link: I was totally finished
Zelda: and he was really wasted!
Ganon: we went back downstairs
Nabooru: to get a quick looker
Link: she drained all my money
Zelda: I didn't know he was a hooker!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i!
Nabooru: Now I'm out of cash
Link: and I'm really really tired
Zelda: I can't believe he did this
Ganon: it really burns my fire
Nabooru: It wasn't really that good
Link: I should of gotten it for free
Ganon: now I see why it was.
Zelda: they were really a he/she!
All: OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy idy idy i! OOOOHHHH. idy idy idy idy iiiiidddy. iiiidddyyy. iiiiiii!
*audience starts clapping and they go back and sit down*
Ruto: okay. that was. off subject a little. Figures you guys would get to sex! Anyways, all of your points double for that! So you guys should know where you stand!
All: *blank stares*
Ruto: Ah. nevermind! Time for the last game of the night, you asked for it, Hyrule's worst!
*everyone comes down on the stair and they stand in a line*
Ruto: Everyone already knows what this is so, let's just get it over with! Hyrule's worst. oh great. Zelda characters!
*everyone steps down and starts pointing to each other*
Ruto: *beep, beep* we get the point.
*they step back up, but then everyone steps down and points at Ruto*
Ruto: *beep, beep, beep, beep, beep* NOT funny!
Link: Tingle!!!
Zelda: um. yeah he's right, Tingle!
Nabooru: The phantom ganon in the forest temple. man that guy was easy!
Ganon: and kotake and koume weren't?
Nabooru: they were hard!
Link: no they weren't, I thought you were stronger than that to get captured by them!
Nabooru: Hey! You just stood on a ledge and watched!
Link: What did you want me to do? Jump to my doom? It was really high!
Nabooru: hmph. some hero of time!
Ruto: um. next category. Hyrule's worst monster enemies!
Link: the very first one in ocarina of time. man that thing was too easy!
Ganon: hey! It killed the Deku tree, didn't it?
*beep*
Zelda, Link, Nabooru: GANNONDORF!
Ganon: I'm not a monster!
All: YES YOU ARE!
*beep*
Ruto: I was waiting for that!
Zelda: Majora's mask. it's a mask! And if you have the fierce deity's mask, its TOO easy!
*beep*
Ruto: Hyrule's worst pointless places.
Nabooru: Hyrule Castle!
Zelda: Wha, wha, what!?
*beep*
Ganon: the mask shop. there should be a male Gerudo mask too!
*beep*
Link: the bombchu shop!
Zelda: Gerudo's fortress!
Nabooru: why you little.
*Nabooru tackles Zelda and the too start brawling on the ground*
Ruto: Hey! Hey! Why couldn't I do that.. *Ruto jumps in and tries and helps Nabooru out*
*the entangled three continue duking it out on the floor, Link and Ganon start whooping and cheering for them*
Zelda: remember! I'm in super smash bros melee!
Nabooru: OUCH! Yeah, and you're no good at fighting unless you cross- dress!
Ruto: shut up and get her Nabooru!
Nabooru: Don't tell me what to do, you ugly fish!
Ruto: WHAT? That's it!
*Ruto starts after Nabooru now and the three continue to hurt each other, Darunia runs up in front of them on the stage with a Microphone in his hand and tries to ignore them*
Darunia: That's all for this editon, remember what Mystic says. reviews equals more editions! No points, no winner, no special game! Bye bye!
