[Cue the SD FFVIII fic characters dancing across the screen!]

All: ^-^ "omake Omake OMAKE! WAAAIIIIII!!"

[Suddenly they all freak out and run away. Moments later, a crazed, giant
mechanical spider chases after them!]

Chibi-Chaos: [at the helm] "How do you drive this X-ATM...whatever the hell
this thing's name is?!"

Chibi-Quistis: [drawing a spell bead] "THUNDARA!!"

Chibi-Xu: "Isn't metal a great conductor for electricity?"

*ZAP!!!*

Chibi-Chaos: --;; [smoky li'l author] "OW."

Chibi-Quistis: ^^; "Oops."

Chibi-Chaos: "Yeah...oops."




Sowing the SeeDs:

OMAKE THEATRE 8


[Cue a platoon of Chibis milling around Balamb Garden's Quad. The camera
swings around to focus in on Chibi-Xu.]

Chibi-Xu: "Like a weed that won't die, let me welcome you to yet *another* Omake
Theatre."

Chibi-Sean: o.O "That's rather pessimistic of you, Xu-chan. What's up?"

[Chibi-Xu shoots a pointed glare towards the three authors, who have
made themselves at home in the Garden.]

Chibi-Xu: --; "*They're* here!"

Chibi-Sean: [consoling hug] "Awww.. What mischief can they cause in an Omake?"

Chibi-Chaos: "Say, anyone want to hear my newest song for the FFVIII character
album?"

Everyone: "No."

Chibi-Chaos: ^^v "Too bad! I'm an author. Somebody cue the Eiffel 65 music!"

[A frighteningly addictive techno beat starts up, complete with keyboard
piano intro!]

Chibi-Chaos: [with mic] "Okay, here's my first smash single, Xu (Da Ba
Dee)!!"

Chibi-Xu: [NASTY eyebrow twitch] "He's not serious, is he?"

Chibi-Beans: "Sadly, he is."

Chibi-Chaos: [singing]

o/~ Now listen up, here's a fanfic
About a little girl who lives in a Xu world
And all day and all night
Everything she sees is Xu like her
Inside and outside
Xu's Anshin
With a Xu Balamb Garden
And a Xu.... o/~

[The music comes to a screeching halt.]

Chibi-Chaos: [pausing] "Okay, I'm still working on that part."

[Cue the facevaults!]

Chibi-Sean: [loading his pistol] "Well, Chaos was right. This song'll be a
smash--though that will happen to *him* once the lynch mob arrives. Laguna,
would you care to do the honours?"

[A large temporal rift suddenly opens up with a dazzling CG cinema.
Everyone choruses "ooooh!" as Chibi-Laguna makes his dramatic appearance and
steps out from the portal. Chibi-Leguna then gives Chaos an evil grin.]

Chibi-Laguna: ) "My pleasure. Presenting my Limit Break: DESPERADO!!"

[Frantically, Chibi-Chaos makes a mad dash across the Omake as Chibi-Laguna
launches a full machine-gun assault and then lobs a few hand grenades at the
SD author for good measure.]

Chaos: @.@ "Who gave that chibi a gun?"

Chibi-Xu: [glowering] "Maybe we should get Greenbeans too."

Chibi-Beans: o.O; [panicky li'l bean] "Me?! Why?"

Chibi-Xu: [pointing at Chaos] "You let him work on the fic. It's your
fault."

Chibi-Beans: [shuffling her feet] "Quistis-chan would defend me."

Chibi-Quandry: "Beans, she's a SeeD. You can't afford her services..."

Chibi-Beans: ) "I have enough money for a one night stand!"

Chibi-Quistis: [blush!]

Chibi-Quandry: o.O;; "ACK!!!!"

[Cue the facevaults!]

Chibi-Beans: ^^v "I'm waiting to be pounded for that comment."

Chibi-Xu: --;; "Your innuendos are as subtle as a T-Rexaur in a china shop."

Chibi-Quandry: ;D "Somebody get Sean out the back door, then."

Chibi-Xu: [turning to Sean] "You say NOTHING about this, okay?"

Chibi-Sean: ^-^v "Hey, I can afford you for a one night stand anytime, Xu."

[Chibi-Sean is unceremoniously throttled by Chibi-Xu!]

Chibi-Quistis: [still blushing] "I'm feeling a little self-conscious with
all this attention."

Chibi-Beans: [pat pat!] "That's okay, Quistis-chan. I'm sure after tonight
with me, you'll get used to it."

Chibi-Quistis: "What are we doing tonight?"

[Chibi-Beans abruptly feigns innocence as she tries to hide a copy of the
Kama Xutra behind her back.]

Chibi-Chaos: ^-^ "And just remember!"

Chibi-Laguna: "What? You're still alive?"

Chibi-Chaos: --;; "No thanks to you, Mister 'I've watched too many Chun
Yow-Fat movies.' Now as I was saying, remember that your self-gratuitous
moments with FFVIII characters are akin to Guardian Forces. You spend too much
time with Quistis, and Xu'll get jealous."

Chibi-Beans: o.O;;

Chibi-Xu: [sharpening her sai] "I'm gonna plant you 6 feet under."

Chibi-Chaos: "But then how are you going to water her?"

Chibi-Xu: "I wasn't talking about a tree, you moron!"

Chibi-Quandry: o.O! "Yo, yo, might I suggest we start running?"

Chibi-Authors: [making tracks!] "Aiiiyyaaaa!!"

Chibi-Chaos: [lagging behind] "So what did Xu mean?"

[As the authors heroically run down the halls and bowling over hapless cadets
as they scream for help, the SeeDs casually watch the spectacle.]

Chibi-Sean: "That was rather harsh, Xu, don't you think?"

Chibi-Xu: ) "Not as harsh as the swarm of Glacial Eyes that are waiting outside
the gate."

Chibi-Quistis: "You don't like them, do you?"

Chibi-Xu: "I don't have to answer that."

Chibi-Enju: "She's just jealous of you Quistis, that's all. You get more cinemas in the
game than her."

Chibi-Xu: [GLARE!] "What was that?"

Chibi-Enju: ^-^;;;;; "Er, nothing! Gee... Xu with a grudge, and I thought Kei was bad!"

Chibi-Kei: "The quiet ones are more dangerous."

Chibi-Enju: "Hello? Semi-flamboyant killer assassin here?"

[Chibi-Kei abruptly punts Chibi-Enju up into a light fixture!]

Chibi-Kei: "You were saying?"

Chibi-Enju: "And you call yourself aligned with justice?!"

Chibi-Sean: "So the authors are gone, Xu's got a psychosis, and Enju and Kei are
fighting yet again. Say, Quistis, want to get some hot dogs."

Chibi-Quistis: "I'd rather not. Rumour has it that hot dogs are made from Grat."

Chibi-Sean: . "Ewwwwww...."


[End!]