5.
"We're going out," Shawn said.
"Who's we?" Eric asked.
"Well, the young marrieds, me, Kat, and we're trying to convince Jack. You're invited too."
"Where?"
"There's this new club. Tay told me that it's like the hottest spot right now." Shawn stopped and waited for Eric's response.
"Okay with me," Eric replied slowly, his face thoughtful. "How far away is it from here?"
"Only a few blocks. So we can just walk home if it's too, um, boring," Shawn pointed out.
Eric sighed and got off of the couch. "I'll be ready in a few."
*****
The club was actually similar to the last one, enough that Eric immediately felt uncomfortable. He flagged down the bartender and drank two 7&7's before stepping away and going to find his friends. Shawn was already on the dance floor, with Kat. Eric didn't know that they were still seeing each other, but was glad for Shawn.
He spotted Jack, sitting in a booth by himself, nursing something dark. He ordered another 7&7 before going over to join him. "Whatcha doing over here by your lonesome?" Eric asked casually, sitting down.
"Not really into the party scene. That's not a whisky sour."
Eric made a face involuntarily. "I don't drink those anymore." Even remembering that taste could make the bile rise in the back of his throat.
Jack looked like he was about to ask a question, but changed his mind and held his drink up to the light, such as it was. "I guess that's why I'm sticking to Coke. So, wanna dance?"
"I don't dance, either." Eric closed his eyes and tried not to let the well of emotions that came over him at that statement boil over. When he opened his eyes, Jack was looking at him, sadly. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that." He brushed a hand over his hair impatiently. "This isn't working. I'm heading back to the apartment. Wanna come?"
"Sure."
After saying their goodbyes, they walked out of the club and went home. When they got there, Eric sat Jack down on the couch. "I need to tell you some things, and I'm just drunk enough to tell you." When Jack opened his mouth to speak, Eric raised a warning hand. "Please, just let me."
Jack nodded and listened as Eric told him about his coming out to Shawn, and going to that club and having a great time, and having it end oh so wrongly. "And being there tonight, it was like, I felt that it could happen again. And I was so scared, and I was even more scared now, because I knew what would happen."
Jack was crying quietly by the time Eric finished, and he wiped his eyes carefully before touching Eric's hand. It wasn't a big touch that would have made Eric jump away, but it was full of comfort and promise. "I am so sorry. Sorry that I wasn't able to tell you how I felt before I left. Sorry that I wasn't here to protect you. Sorry that I can't go find this bastard and kill him for hurting you. But most of all, I'm sorry that I can't make it just go away for you."
"You're here," Eric told him. "It helps."
"Does anyone else know?"
"I think they suspect, but you're the only person that I've told outright."
"Do you want to tell them?"
"Truthfully? No. I don't want to tell Cory that I can't protect him from anything, because I couldn't even keep myself safe. I don't want to tell my parents anything, because they'll worry and there's nothing they can do anyway. And I don't want to talk about it, ever."
Jack nodded. After a beat, he outstretched his arms. Eric fell into them gratefully, letting the warmth of someone else penetrate his body willingly. As Jack held him, he felt the tears that had been burning inside of him fall down his cheeks. As he sat there, crying, he felt as if he was being washed from the inside, until he was shiny and clean again.
