A/N/N: Originally I had no intention of doing anything for the second episode of Season 4, but then I started working on other episodes and there were all these references to Kathy, Buffy's erstwhile roommate, and felt that it would be unfair to people who didn't remember the episode to just skip it or write a summary. So I decided to basically rewrite the episode using most of the same text and actions only changing things slightly to accommodate the things that happened to Xander. Therefore this is not entirely or even mostly my creation and do not claim that it is. Oh, and sorry for the wait folks.

Summary: Sequel to Bloody Hell. We all know there's more to Xander than meets the eye. but his friends don't. He intends to keep it that way only life gets in the way, as usual.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that belongs to Joss; I don't have enough energy to list it all. I'm making no money off this so if he tries to sue.all the power to him. His lawyers are about the only ones who'd profit.

A/N: You might want to be slightly familiar with season four because that's when this story is based and some facts come directly from the show. I got all my information from BuffyWorld- a complete guide to all Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel episodes. So I'd like to thank them along with my beta Tray. ***

Chapter II: Soul Eater Inc. (Till Eggs Do Us Part) Buffy

If I hear 'Believe' one more time I'm going to scream. Cher's all well and good but hearing her 24/7 is clearly cause for justifiable homicide. I've got to get out. Slay some vamps. Relieve some pressure in a way other than killing my roommate. Grabbing my jacket, I head for the door. "Going out?" Kathy's ultra cheerful voice stopped me in my tracks. 'That girl's got to be on Prozac.' I turned back to my roommate and plastered a grin on my face. 'Quick girl come up with a reason other than her driving me to murder.' "Yeah. I'm seriously caffeine deprived. Figure I'd head down to The Grotto and get a jolt and, you know, do some studying. " 'I can't believe how lame that sounded.' "Oh. It's late...won't you be up all night?" Her face was scrunched up with what looked like genuine worry. I picked up my backpack. "Oh, yeah, but it's cool. I'm sort of an 'up' kind of night person. I mentioned that right?" Cause I don't want to have to play twenty questions for the next four years every time I have to kick demon ass. Kathy's expression didn't change one wit. "I guess I just didn't realize you'd be coming and going at all hours. Well, not that I mind. I'm just surprised." 'Now I feel guilty.' "I'll be quiet as a mouse, I promise. Ok." I tried making a break for it again. "Oh! Say, Buffy. I wanted to show you this little system I implemented." 'So close.' I turned back as Kathy pranced over to the nightstand and got a little notepad and pen and pranced back. "Oh, goody... system." Just what I need. I never did get the Dewey decimal thingy. Kathy's smile looked like it was going to crack her face it was so big. "Just log every call you make in here and that way when the bill comes it won't be a problem. I figure, 'Stitch in time...' " " '...catches the worm.'" I finished sarcastically. Kathy cheerfully gave me a "you got it" gesture my sarcasm going right over her head.

'I guess sarcasm isn't going to work.' "You bet. Ok, then." I turned again. "Also..." she started. My hand hovered over the doorknob and it took all my willpower not to snap at Kathy. I turned around once more and resisted the urge to sigh. "I noticed that some of my milk was missing. Did you...." "Oh! Yeah, actually, I did. I meant to..." 'Oops. I didn't think she'd notice. What did she do, measure the level of milk?' Kathy looked kind of hurt. "No! It's totally ok, I was just wondering." "Yeah, I-I-I was making my coffee and I just...." It was kind of rude of me. Kathy nodded. "Buffy, it's fine. I just wanted to make sure..." The song ended and before I could give a sigh of relief Kathy headed over to the stereo to restart it, again. 'Damn.' She came back while I just stood there uncomfortable. " ...that we didn't have a thief or something." She went on as if she'd never stopped. "Like who? Sid the Wiley Dairy Gnome?" I joked. Kathy shrugged. "I don't know, it's no big deal. Please, feel free." Even as she said it I felt as if she didn't mean it, that she was disappointed. Creepily, it reminded me of Mom. "Ok, I'm really sorry. I have to..." I started to go, again. "Have a good time," she called to me, all cheer once more. "Yeah, you too. With ironing." I breathed a sigh of relief when I finally made it to the other side of the door. 'Demons are definitely easier to handle than roommates.' Kathy 'My sweater is absolutely ruined!' I frowned at the stains caused by Buffy's shove into the bushes. I'd followed her thinking coffee sounded good only to be attacked. We were just walking along then suddenly I was flying into the bushes, pushed by Buffy. In a way I was grateful for the save but I was seriously exasperated with this stain. I sighed after another scrub. My gaze fell on the rug. I felt a wave of irritation at the disdainfully turned up corner. I pushed the feeling aside and leaned down to straighten it. Satisfied, I looked back at my sweater. 'I will never feel satisfaction from that. It is ruined.' My gaze was drawn to Buffy's closet. 'Maybe.' Unfolding my legs I hopped off the bed. A few short steps and I was standing in front of Buffy's wardrobe. Pulling the bolt back, I opened it and began looking over the choices of clothing. Buffy has some nice clothes. I complimented her on her style. I took a sweater off the rod and when I turned it around to see it fully a bag on the floor caught my eye. More precisely, the crossbow sticking out of it caught my eye. Hanging the sweater on the knob for the moment I knelt to take a closer look. I opened the bag and pulled out the first thing I grabbed. It was the crossbow I'd seen sticking out. I reached in again and this time a wooden cross was in my hands. 'Well.' I paused for a moment, my thoughts ricocheting around in my skull. Then I put them back and grabbed the sweater. 'One for the other indeed.' A plan forming in my mind. Buffy It was nice and sunny on Giles' patio and that fountain was kind of pretty, but going through his mail just wasn't normally my idea of fun. I sighed and went over my findings. "Boring... boring... bill... bill... " I frowned to myself. I just had to get out from under the Kathy cloud. That girl makes Willow look like the most cynical slut in existence. Eager as a puppy and twice as naive. If she follows me out on patrol every night she's going to end up dead and it'll be all my fault. Not that I wouldn't mind getting her out of my hair. just not that way. 'I mean come on. She doesn't even swear! She completely ruined my slay. And I woke up to 'Believe'. Doesn't she ever get tired of that song? ' I was shocked out of Giles' mail by the man himself. In exercise clothes. I checked. . And yep he was wearing sneakers. I stared as he came up to me looking winded.

"Hello," Giles greeted me, then stopped to take a deep breath. I couldn't help myself. "You run?" The thought of him doing anything other than reading a dusty book was slightly astounding. 'Okay he swings a mean axe but I've never actually seen him - exercise.'

Giles gave me one of his patented small British smiles, the ones that let me know he's finding me particularly amusing right now. "And jump. And bend." He paused for another breath. "And, occasionally, frolic." A picture of Giles frolicking in a field with big blonde pigtails flopping around behind, wearing a blue checkered dress, a wicker basket looped in one arm a daisy in his other hand, a big smile on his face, and the light glinting off his glasses popped into my mind. I quickly banished the disturbing image and changed the subject away from frolicking. I grabbed the magazine I'd put aside earlier. "Ok, and, uh-" I held it up. "What's with the motorbike and scooter magazine?" Giles shook his head. "Congratulations, you've found me out. I'm a mod jogger."

I frowned. 'What the hell is that?' "Ok, you're not having one of those mid-life things, are you? 'Cause I'm still going 'ick' from the last time you tried to recapture your youth." Definite ick. I'm SO glad I got there before they did anything.

"Buffy!" Giles shouted indignantly, blushing slightly.

I felt heat rise on my own cheeks. "Sorry," I mumbled. Better head right for the supposed reason I'm here. "Demon. Last night. Made with the pummeling, but he got away."

Giles became all business. "What sort of demon?" Giles moved over to the fountain and sat on its edge. 'Once a Watcher, always a Watcher I guess.' Drawing up everything I remembered, I was struck by my lack of information. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Hesitantly, I began. "Umm, had a cloak on, and glowing green eyes, and skin had a, like, super-bad fake rub-on tan."

Giles rubbed his nose telling me he was annoyed. "Translate?"

I felt my forehead scrunch up. This was California. Hadn't he ever seen a fake tan? "Orange-y?"

He looked at me expectantly when I didn't leave. "Thank you. Anything else?" I felt I really should tell him about Kathy. The whole fiasco had me feeling out of sorts. I wanted someone to tell me what to do about her.

"My roommate Kathy was there, but she didn't see anything," I said sulkily. I wanted to talk about it but I didn't. 'I seem to be two minds about everything lately.'

"You took your roommate patrolling with you?" Giles looked scandalized at the thought.

"Well, I invited the whole dorm, but she was the only one that could make it." The look on his face told me he didn't hear the sarcasm. I rolled my eyes. 'After more than three years around teenagers you'd think he'd recognize sarcasm of all things.' "I told her I was going for coffee and she decided to tag along," I explained.

"Right." Giles looked uncomfortable at his slip. "Well, we should discourage her from that habit. From what you described, I-I'm not familiar with the creature, but I-I'll look into it and give you a ring when I've found something." Giles hit his knee, then got up and headed for his apartment. Boredom loomed in front of me. Desperate I called after Giles. "You know, it's nice out here."

He turned towards me. "Yes, I take my tea out here sometimes." 'I'm not surprised.' Giles started to go again. 'No wait!' "What are you doing today?" That was lame. But it was the first thing that popped into my mind. Looking in high spirits, he turned back again. "Uh, it's a good day for me, actually. A friend of mine recently acquired an, uh, an original Gutenberg demonography..." My eyes were starting to glaze over and he noticed, stopping to take a deep look at me. I straightened, trying to look innocent and absorbed. Wary now, he continued. "And it suddenly occurred to me that you've never once asked me what my day's plans were, which leads me to inquire whether you're feeling entirely yourself. "

"That's not true," I protested. "I ask about you all the time." He gave me a look and I tried to actually recall the last time I'd asked about him. "Ok, well, maybe the words don't actually make it out of my mouth, but I think about it."

"And it's appreciated. Which doesn't explain why you're hanging around here instead of rushing off as usual." Giles looked very parental at the moment. He was pushing, for my own good. Times like these make me wish he really was my father.

That doesn't mean I'm going to pour my heart out, right away. He's going to have to work for it. "It's no big. I just figured I'd hang here-you know-until my roommate goes to class." I dropped the clue.

And he snatched it up like I knew he would. "Ah, I see." He sat back down on the fountain and just looked at me, letting me see his concern and understanding. 'He's worked enough.' I looked down at my hands. They were clutching each other nervously. "I know, it's probably just me having a bitch attack. But it's not... me." I'm feeling so guilty but at the same time I'm not. I really dislike Kathy. and it's not all my fault!

"Buffy." I didn't look up to see his face but I felt the patience in his voice, "Living with somebody is never easy. Especially for an only child...." 'That's not it!' I looked up, some of my frustration leaking into my gaze. "Giles, listen to me, ok? When she sharpens her pencils she measures them with a ruler to make sure they're all the same size." God, she's anal.

Giles blinked. "Which is fussy, I agree, but everybody has their idiosyncrasies. You'd do well to learn to tolerate them." I grinned wryly at him. "Or I'll end up an old lady who can only live with cats?"

He chuckled a little. "Something like that." "Ok. You know what? You're right." I stood up. "Take a mental pic, this is the new Buffy. Kinder, gentler... roommate extraordinaire." 'You can sharpen your pencils all you want, Kathy. No more letting it get on MY nerves.' I smiled at Giles and he got up as well. "I'm sure you will be. Now head along before the birds take you as a permanent fixture." His fatherly smile gave me confidence and I headed off to face Kathy the pencil queen. Parker I watched a blonde duck behind a tray and smiled. 'The Rocket Café does it every time.' She was a little more muscular then my usual type but still quite a view. My smile grew bigger when she jumped into line in front of me. I took a quick peek behind me trying to see exactly who she was hiding from but gave it up. Too many people. Besides it didn't really matter, it was whoever's loss and my gain. "Ex-boyfriend? Or loan shark?" She jumped again, only this time because she was startled. She turned to face me, a puzzled look on her face, which in no way decreased her attractiveness. "Excuse me?"

I gestured to the press of people around us, my smile still tugging at my lips. "The person you're hiding from."

"Oh... both. Ugly breakup." She suddenly looked abashed. "I'm sorry, I just cut you..." She moved to get in the back of the line.

"No, stay... stay. I'll watch your back." 'Along with everything else.' Before she could say anything more we were moved forward with the line. I watched her carefully as she picked her food. "Freshman, huh?"

"Is it that obvious?" She looked startled again and I found that look appealing.

Smiling at her, I nodded. "There are signs." I grabbed a box of Fruit Loops and stuffed it into my shirt. "For instance, people who've been around for awhile know how to use their dining hall card," I casually mentioned, even though I'm actually trying to get her in my good graces by helping her out.

A little frown creased her forehead. "It's not for food?"

"Work it right and you can get three meals worth, which equals fewer punch cards used annually." I let her in on this commonly known trick as if it were a great secret or as if I was the genius that thought of it. Well, anything to impress a girl.

I received a nod and look of gratification for my troubles. "And more cash from dad which you get to keep for yourself."

"Right! The goal is to polish off as much as humanly possible at one sitting. Enough to get you through the rest of the day, if necessary. while chipmunking items for future consumption." I slipped more food onto my plate, putting actions into words.

"Ahh, got it," she said, grinning at me. Her smile was truly worth the wait.

'More tips to keep her awed, Parker.' "Excess dry goods fit nicely in a backpack or your pocket." I grabbed a bag of pretzels and shoved it into my back pocket. "The wetter items - macaronis, your turkey loaf - then you're into Ziplocs. It's not for beginners." I didn't demonstrate, as it was a rather messy procedure, not something likely to impress either more like gag.

"I'll just take it slow," she said, mock seriously.

We got to the end of the line and I gave my card to Old Betsy who didn't give me a second glance. The girl I'd been trying to impress started looking around as Betsy finished up with her usual silent efficiency. I followed her gaze and saw a cute red head waving at her. The red head had a sort of sweet innocence thing going on and if I hadn't already seen whoever this knock out was, I might have made a try for her instead. Taking my eyes off the red head I looked at her dining companions. The guy next to her had dyed hair and was sitting rather close to her in a way that screamed boyfriend. He seemed vaguely familiar, but then with so many people who gravitate around in my circles just about everyone does to me. Looking past him I stopped and took a deep breath. 'Nick?' I took a closer look. 'No, not Nick. Shit, he could pass for my brother.' I could barely keep the shock off my face. The guy's dark features, high check bones, and angular jaw wouldn't have earned him a second glance at one of the family gatherings and for a moment my heart gave a lurch. 'What if he's one of my cousins?' The thought certainly wasn't pleasant, as the family wouldn't appreciate what I'd been doing. No one but the elders ever kept track of all the cousins and the possibility was there that he was one. I glanced at the girl trying to decide what to do. Her sunny smile gave me confidence. "So."

"So, those are my...." She waved at the people waiting for her. "Are you..." I could tell she wanted me to come with.

I felt a second of panic. I glanced at her friends. 'I'll try again, hopefully when he's not around.' "Oh, no, I have someone waiting. Otherwise I'd... heh, uh, Parker Abrams." Doing the polite thing I held out my hand. She gazed at it for a second then took it in a firm grip. "I'm at Kresge hall."

"Buffy Summers, Stevenson." A name at last.

I gave her my most winning smile. "Ok, well, I'll see you around, Buffy Summers of Stevenson."

"See ya, Parker Abrams." She turned to go. I watched as her butt swashed as she walked. "You certainly will," I muttered to myself.

Xander Coming on college grounds made me feel kind of like a trespasser. Not that I'd let anyone know that. My days of quivering in fear are over, at least in public. It's just that being among these hallowed halls reminds me that some people actually have to work for their knowledge, unlike me, who's basically inherited it all from someone who no longer had any need of it. I wasn't complaining. It just made me feel sort of guilty. but I never did get the hang of listening to my teachers. Most of whom thought I was an idiot because the years between kindergarten and fourth grade saw me learning from private tutors after school. My mother didn't believe in the public school system, being a product of private tutoring herself, and I had to beg her to let me go. Mom never looked at my public school report card so the whole thing was basically playtime for me. After her death the bastard didn't want to pay for anything that he could get for free and I was in public school full time. That's when my reputation for clowning around and never doing my work turned against me. Combined with the loss of the outside learning from people I respected (along with my mother), the scorn of my new teachers, and my belligerence in the face of their scorn, I didn't learn much during school hours after I turned ten. I graduated but did the bare minimum to do so. In later years when I might have begun to regret my actions in elementary and middle school, I basically didn't think much of it. I thought I was going to die an early death so there was no point in trying to make up those years. Ha on me. I was just lucky I acquired the memories of two people who had actually gone out of their way to be educated. Seeing my friends, though, was the reason I'd come - not to confront my feelings about my acquired memories. They were the whole reason I'd come back and I wasn't going to let a little thing like how I felt keep me from them.

Finding them was easy enough, though they'd forgotten to give me their room assignments; I just hung around the cafeteria until one of them got hungry and showed up. Eventually Willow left her books at the call of her stomach. I saw that college life seemed to suit her; she was practically glowing with excitement. I smiled at Oz tagging along beside her. He looked as calm and unflappable as ever. I couldn't tell if college life was any different from high school life for him, not that I really expected to. His stance was guarded and every once and a while he shot a look at a party that seemed a little interested in Willow. 'How doggie of him. At least he hasn't marked his territory. I don't think Willow would appreciate the smell.' I, for one, knew that the competition eyeing my bud didn't have a chance. Wolves mate for life. Now that they've done the nasty Willow would no more stray than I'd . dress up like a clown and do the hula. I waited in the background, being an innocuous college student among the dozens of hungry college students, and checked to see that I was breathing and on the immortal side of my being. I'm not sure how much his lycanthropy affects his senses but I don't really want to take the chance that Oz would notice if I had no heartbeat. Controlling my life systems is no longer an unconscious part of me. I have to focus to make sure I'm breathing and such because my body no longer requires it. It's a form of muscle control and when I forget I find that my body does too. I slip into "dead". I guess it wastes less energy. It's like there are two things my body can do with itself- be immortal or be vampire. Why it has to drift to vampire is probably one of God's jokes on me. This strange duality comes in handy 'cause I can hide from both mostly hostile types by becoming the one they can't sense. I can even toe the middle line and be exactly neither at the same time. Now that one takes A LOT of concentration. It makes breathing a piece of pie with a cherry on top. I did a double check as they grabbed their food. When they were settled, I moved in. I made with the smiles as l plopped down in an empty chair besides Wills. "How's my best buds?"

"Xander!" Willow half rose and hugged me. She then let go and smacked me on the back of the head. "Where have you been?"

I rubbed the back of my head more in surprise than pain. "Jeez, Willow. What have you been doing here? Taking Cordy lessons?" I took one look at her frowning face and a bark of laughter escaped me. Several people from surrounding tables gave me looks that said, "there goes another one," and went back to their meals as if craziness was just another part of college life. 'Makes me suddenly glad I'm not going.' Willow now she looked slightly amused but she was holding on tightly to her indignation at being compared to Cordelia. "Ah, but who could teach that save for the Master herself? And clearly she's not here." Oz's dry comment made Willow's decidedly red face turn redder. "Too true." I decided to let Willow off the hook. "So how are you two?" Oz gave me a small smile and a shrug which I interrupted as, 'Fine. For now.' And I shook my head at my own ability to read his way of "speaking". I turned to Willow and she was practically bouncing in her seat. "I'm great. College's great." Enthusiasm smothered her voice. "Now there's the Willow I love." I gave her a kiss on the cheek and she blushed again. "Isn't that Buffy?" I turned my gaze from my embarrassed friend to look for the other one Oz had apparently spotted. Following Oz's gaze I saw Buffy talking with a guy. "Yeah. It is," I said coolly, assessing Buffy's new friend. Willow waved and caught Buffy's eye. Me, I focused on the guy. Maybe it's because of the way things tend to happen in my life - scratch that it's definitely because of the crappy way things tend to happen in my life - but it's made me paranoid. This dude was paying attention to our neighborhood Slayer. Now, he may have just been bitten by the love bug. Not entirely impossible, in fact it was rather likely. I didn't fall of my skateboard at first sight for no reason. However plenty of demons would take any opportunity to get close to the Slayer and then destroy her. He was to be watched. Buffy split from her new friend and weaved her way over to our table. She sat down between Oz and me. I gave her one of my trademark goofy smiles. "Hey, say hi to the non-college guy." Buffy smiled in return. "Not that I mind, but don't non-college guys usually populate the non-campus." Her tone was teasing but it stung nevertheless. 'If I didn't come on campus I'd never see you.' Instead of saying it I covered my hurt and stole a fry from Wills. As I munched I answered, "Usually. I just thought I'd come around and check on my girls." I gave Oz a tap on the arm to show I wasn't counting him among the girls but I was happy to see him too. Then I realized what I'd done. 'Oh, God. I'm beginning to speak Ozese.' "And eat off my plate." Willow put in trying to guard her fries as I made another supply run. "What's the deal, Xand, parents not feeding you?" Buffy teased and once more I marveled at how little she actually knew about my home life. 'Well it's not like you actually tell her anything.' My conscience put in. 'True. Wills never tells what she knows either.' Willow learned long ago that talking about home was not a good thing. I nodded, "Sure. For a price." The lie rolled easily off my tongue, which I rewarded with another fry from Willow's plate. 'And so the fiction continues.' Willow gave up on protecting her plate and I flashed her a grin. I waved a fry formally-known-as-Willow's in the direction of the guy she'd been talking to. 'Reconnaissance time.' "Doing some recruiting, Buffy?" I quirked an eyebrow at her. She glanced over her shoulder and turned back with a blush on her cheeks. I revised my judgment of his threat level up a notch. The ones that are nice at first hurt more than the ones who are evil from the start. Buffy shook her head in denial. "No big, just random adorableness." "Oh, a technique I know well. Hit the girl with your best shot, then hasta. " Her further blush told me I was right on the money.

"Gotta respect the drive-by." Oz added. I nodded to him. "Low rejection, fond memories." I might not have done too well in the relationship department in high school but charming a girl for a few minutes, that I could do.

"It looked like more than that to me. He got all googly-eyed." Willow protested. I grew up with a girl best friend. I spent most of my high school life surrounded by females. No way was I going to discount women's intuition. 'Crap. Gotta dig some more.' I turned to Buffy, "That's because he got hit by the Buffinator. Now he's powerless."

"You think?" The hopeful tone in Buffy's voice sealed it. Potential trouble ahead. "No question, he'll be back." Oz said with usual certainty. Buffy smiled happy at her prospective new conquest. "Does this he have a name? Cause referring to him as he will be pretty rude if next we see him attached to your arm," I asked, trying to coax more out of her. "I'm glad you think so highly of my snaring ability. His name's Parker Abrams." Buffy face was covered with a happy little smile. "Oh, the sweet prince." I clasped my hands together and fluttered my eyelashes in false awe. I dropped my pose at Willow's giggle. "Seriously, don't worry. He'll fall at your feet." I gave Buffy a wicked grin, "especially if you throw him there." Buffy groaned and covered her face with her hands to smother her giggles. "So your budding romance aside, anything on the vamp front?" Buffy sighed, no longer laughing. "I did get jumped by a demon of non- specific origin last night." I looked her up and down. "Well you seem to be in one piece. So did this non-specific demon leave by its own volition or get chopped to itty bitty bits?" Buffy opened her mouth but it snapped shut as a strange girl set her tray on the table between us. She was a gawky, tall and skinny, with close a cropped head of hair, and a WAY too cheerful expression on her face. She looked like a future kindergarten teacher to me. "Hi, everybody." She gave us a little wave as she delivered her ever- cheerful greeting. The girl turned to get a chair and I shot a look at Buffy who was staring at the new girl with barely disguised dislike. Buffy swallowed her disgust by the time the girl had dragged her chair over and sat down. "Kathy." Buffy pointed to the girl and the newly christened Kathy gave me an extra cheerful look. "Xander." She pointed to me, the Exalted One. She pointed to the girl again. "Kathy, is my roomie." "Hi," Kathy said again with just as much pep. She stuck out her hand. I gripped it. "Hi, yourself." I frowned a little, still shaking her hand. I could feel her heartbeat through her skin. It seemed a little off. I glanced at Oz. I couldn't take the risk of going vamp with him here. 'She probably just has a murmur or something.' I let go and snatched Willow's last fry. Willow glared at me then turned to Kathy. "Hi." Oz tilted his head. "Hey, Kathy." "Is that my sweater?" Startled, I looked at Buffy. There was some real anger in her voice.

Kathy looked down at the presumed article then back up, her expression the epitome of innocence. "I didn't think you'd mind, I mean you got mine all muddy."

"I was saving you from a..." Buffy protested only to be cut off by a frantic Willow. "Bear!" Buffy gave Willow a long look. "Mugger," she finished. I smothered a chuckle.

Kathy looked hurt. "It's not a problem, is it? I mean, I figured we're almost like sisters now, living together and everything." I looked at Buffy and could tell she figured no such thing. "No," Buffy said half-heartedly, "it's.it's fine. I just wish you'd asked." I got the distinct impression if Kathy had asked the door would have smashed her nose when it got slammed in her face. 'Oookay, time for old distraco Xando.' "So where're you from, Kathy?"

Kathy twisted in her chair to face me. "Nebraska, originally." She gave me a big joyful grin then picked up a burger that would have made Larry proud of her tray. "Ahh, yes. Big sky country." 'That's about all I know of Nebraska.' Kathy smiled again and bit into her burger. A big red blob of ketchup oozed out and fell right onto Buffy's sweater. I looked past Kathy to Buffy. A look of pure dislike was on her face. Her eyes were narrowed on her sweater. 'Oh boy. I think this means war. I hope Kathy has Blue Cross.'

Willow I rubbed the sore spot on my forehead as I hung up the phone. Listening to Buffy complain about Kathy is absolutely testing my limits. 'You don't hear me complaining do you?' My roomie is just as bad or worse. Ever since she got over her jet lag she has been throwing all night mixers, every night. I turned my gaze to the comforting dark outside the window. Compared to the flashing lights and booming noise of the party going on around me the night looked so much nicer. If I weren't afraid I'd be listed in the obits the next day I would be out there instead of staying in and. Suddenly the Nerf ball hit me in the head again. Growling I picked it up and threw it back at it's owner, hard. I was a little miffed when he caught it. 'I think I'll start asking for a new roommate yesterday.' Kathy When I got back from the communal bathroom I found Buffy quickly hanging up the phone. "Don't forget to log those calls." I wish she'd remember to do it on her own. Oh, well. I got on my bed and started flossing. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Buffy get up with an apple in hand and head to the refrigerator. I was suddenly hit by a draft. Looking for the culprit I spotted the open window above Buffy's bed. 'Well I can fix that.' Getting up I shut the window then hopped back on to my bed and grabbed my floss. 'She probably just forgot to close it.' I see Buffy is still at the refrigerator and smile. I'm not usually a proud person but putting my name on everything, even all my hard-boiled eggs, was a pretty smart idea. Now nothing will get mixed up. Buffy turned around and I saw her face had settled into a blank mask. She glanced at the window I'd just shut. Without preamble she strode over and swung it open again. 'How rude. She should know if I closed it I did it for a reason.' I frowned at Buffy as she climbed into bed. Caught up in my thoughts, I finished my last tooth before I realized it. Pulling the floss from my mouth I coiled it up and threw it in the trash. 'I'm going to be tidy at least.' I sighed at Buffy's sad manners and reached for my newest novel. Trying to pick it up, I strangely encounter resistance. Pulling harder, I was disgusted by the trail of gum that followed it from the table. "Ewww! Who left their gum here?" I looked accusingly at Buffy. She didn't say anything for a moment then shrugged. "Gum gnome?" "It wasn't me! It had to be somebody, Buffy!" I heard a gulp followed by an "I don't know" from Buffy's bed. 'Ohh, I thought I'd find another way but that's it. No more Mrs. Nice Kathy.' I slammed my gum covered book down and turned off the light. I was so angry I didn't even stop to clean the book. Buffy's light went off and all was dark. Buffy I almost told Willow no when she said that the gang was going to meet in the lounge to talk, now I'm glad I didn't. I'm not really a day person, probably a side effect of my being the Slayer, but then again I never really was a day person. Still, the nice comfy chairs of the open area lounge made up for the kind of icky out of body feeling I was experiencing. My dream flashed back on me as I told Oz, Willow and Giles about it. *Darkness all around. Bad tan demon with green glowy eyes leaning over me. Feeling helpless then tasting blood on my tongue. The scorpion crawling on my bare stomach. Feeling pinpricks of sweat form in time with its pincher legs steps. Bad tan demon back leaning over me. A twist inside me and something pearly white threading out of my mouth to be swallowed by the demon.* Shaking it off I started talking again. "So then after the scorpion, the demon opened my mouth and sucked some kind of weird light out of me. And the worst part? I wake up and there's Kathy, staring at me like I'm some kind of freak." *Do you always make that noise when you sleep?* Kathy's voice ground through my mind taunting me. Oz gave me a funny look, but then again most of the looks he gives anyone are funny. "Well, actually, for the worst part, I'd have to go with the demon poring the blood down your throat."

Willow swallowed and looked a little green. "Me too, I would vote for that too."

I snorted. "But that's just a dream, and this Kathy thing is real. All she cared about was that her precious sleep had been disturbed."

Giles cleared his throat. "Perhaps it would be more productive to examine your dreams, um, determine their meaning." I opened my mouth to tell him demony dreams were not at all uncommon and analyzing it wouldn't do much good because when the thing was dead then the dream would go poof!

Kathy popped out of nowhere. "You can read dreams? Neat." I ground my teeth at Kathy's fake admiration.

I swallowed my distaste and introduced my roommate. "Giles, Kathy. Kathy, Giles."

Willow jumped in. "He's our grown-up friend." She hesitated then hastily added, "N-not in a creepy way."

Giles gave Kathy his politest British smile. "Nice to meet you, Kathy."

Kathy smiled back with her usual sappiness. "Ditto. Maybe you could read the dream I had last night? There was, like, this monster, and he sat on me and did all this stuff to me." I rolled my eyes at her description.

Oz raised and eyebrow. "Stuff like, scorpions? And Bloody Mary minus the Mary?"

"That's it! How'd you know?" Kathy looked at Oz in awe.

He just shrugged. "Well, I'm a good guesser."

"Me too, and I'm guessing that you need to be on your way to class. Right, Kath?" My voice was snippier than I meant; no wait, it was just as snippy as I meant.

Kathy looked at me patronizingly, "Hmm hmm, sounds like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

"Hmm hmm, and guess what? You were next to it." I shot back.

Kathy just kept looking at me pityingly, "You know, I do need to dash. My whole schedule is off because someone kept me up all night. Well, it's been fun. Toodles." She turned and left, finally. "Toodles." I growled at her back.

Giles cleared his throat. "You know what this means...." He barely registered through my hatred. It did get through though and I nodded. "Yes. Not only does she take my sweater, but now she has to horn in on my dreams. She is the most ever mooch.... Oh, I haven't even gotten to the floss." I seethed as I began listing every little annoying thing about Kathy that was detestable.

"Buffy, focus, please?" Giles sounded irritated. "If Kathy and you are having the same nightmares, chances are something happened to you both when you met the demon in the woods." I waved my hand at him, still caught up in my internal monologue.

"So we need to figure out if this ritual they're dreaming about has some special use, or meaning." Willow said seriously. 'Willow's going all witchy on us.'

I sighed. They didn't need me to help them analyze my dream pointlessly. I got up and gathered my stuff. "Cool, you guys can do the brain thing. I'm gonna go to class."

"Which could also be construed as the brain thing." Oz pointed out.

I shook my head. "Not when you're minoring in 'Napping 101.'" It wasn't that I was really anxious to get to class, it was more that I just wanted to be away. I gave them all a final look then went on my way, not realizing I was leaving some severely worried friends behind me.

Raggitt (Bad Tan Demon) This dimension is very strange. The night is far too bright and the day. is not worth mentioning. The only good thing about those too bright hours is the heat. Why our prey would choose this place to run to is beyond me. At least the wood areas are dense enough to hide us from the humans and also serve as a way to warm the night hours. Fire is not something widely called for in our plane and I thank my ancestors that I had picked up the skill to create one. My cohort came up to the warming fire. He gave me a nod as he settled beside me. ^We were correct. She is the one.^ His lyrical speech was lovely to my ears after hearing the harsh words the humans used all day. ^Good.^ I communicated my happiness that we would soon leave this rock. ^I have prepared for the summoning of the great one, Taparrich.^ At my words we removed our hoods, letting our bald heads reflect the fire into the night. I turned to face the fire and my fellow followed suit. Together we began to speak the words to bring Taparrich forth. Buffy I dragged my feet a little after class, not wanting to be faced with Kathy. However I couldn't stay away forever; for one thing I had nowhere else to go. I paused outside my door when the haunting strains of 'Believe' assaulted my ears. A shudder went through me but I forced myself to turn the knob. Swinging the door open Cher hit me full blast and so did the sight of Parker half lying on Kathy's bed. My nostrils flared at the sight of them looking so cozy talking together in our room, alone. Parker was smiling, "Lots of popular artists don't get their dues. Madonna? Whitney?"

Kathy was nodding her head in agreement. "That's so totally true."

And me, I was ticked. The one thing I had she hadn't touched and now.. "Parker?" My voice communicated my disbelief at this final invasion.

Parker looked up guiltily then climbed off Kathy's bed. "Hey, uh, I just dropped by to say... that. Uh, and bring you...." He gave me a box of plastic baggies. I looked down at the box incredulously. After consorting with my deadly enemy he was trying to give me Ziploc? "You know, to maximize your dining hall exports. They're heavy duty." Still a present is a present.

I read the box for lack of anything better to do with it. "Plus freezer guard! That's so...." I looked up at him at a loss for words.

Kathy got up and moved in close to Parker, almost touching him completely on his side. She looked up into his eyes but her words were directed at me. "Parker was just going to leave his number and go, but" her laugh was like nails on a chalkboard, "we started talking. He's such a blast, and time just flew." 'Flew. Oh girl you're going to fly, right out the window!'

Instead of voicing my murderous thoughts I turned to Parker. "Time, really? How much time?"

Parker looked guilty again. "Uh, I'm not sure, we sort of got caught up talking Red Wings. It turns out that Kathy's a closet hockey fan. I think it's the violence." He chuckled. I almost told him he was about to see some violence up close and personal.

Kathy gave another laugh and I couldn't help my stare. 'Does she really think that's alluring?' "Quit it! I told you that was just between us."

"It could be the sweaty men." His words were teasing and flirty. I couldn't believe Kathy was getting to him. Kathy laughed and shoved him. I couldn't stand it anymore. I pushed past them, making for my bed. "If you two are going to rassle, do you mind taking it outside? I've got a lot of work to do." My bitterness was reflected in my voice. I put my books on my bed and reached over to turn off the damn music. "Sorry, I didn't realize." He turned to leave. I could sense the hurt I'd inflicted on Parker and felt my own flash of guilt. I was just mad at Kathy not him, not really. "Oh, Parker wait. Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...." I started apologizing.

Parker shook his head and a small smile touched the corner of his mouth. "No, it's totally cool. I should go anyway."

I swallowed my own pain now. "Well, it was great of you to stop by; m-maybe we could do it another time?" I asked almost plaintively. I didn't mean to scare off the one decent person I'd met here at college.

"Another time for sure." Parker's smile became more genuine. Then he turned to Kathy. "Bye, Kathy." He gave her a little wave and I felt hate boil up. 'He gave her a wave! He didn't even say good bye to me specifically and he does to her!' Kathy waved back, awkwardly like a dead fish I was happy to note. "Bye, see- ya." I saw him out. When I closed the door an ominous click resounded through the room. I turned to face Kathy. For once she didn't look like her perpetually happy self. The same anger that was roiling through me was reflected in her eyes and I felt a sort of twisted triumph in knowing I was the one who'd broken through her mask.

"It wouldn't have killed you to be nice, you know." She practically spat it, making no effort to reclaim her cheer.

I rewarded her with a scornful look then moved to my bed and pulled out my new security. "Looked like you were being nice enough for the both of us. "

Kathy moved over and shut MY window. "I wasn't moving in on your territory, if that's what you mean."

I pretended to ignore her, closing my window as I placed my new padlock on the closet bolt. Hopefully it would keep certain people out of my closet. "Right. Just like you didn't destroy my sweater."

Kathy pulled out her floss and started sawing back and forth. I went to my window and opened it again. Kathy paused in her flossing to glare at me. "I'm cold."

"Well I'm hot. Deal with it." I snapped at her. I no longer gave a damn what she thought. She was the roommate from Hell.

"Do you know what your problem is, Buffy." The way she said it made my name into a curse.

I smiled at her, teeth bared. "You?"

Kathy shook her head. "Hardly. Your problem is you're spoiled. Maybe the world revolved around you where you used to live, but it's share time now." She talked to me like I was a child. A not particularly bright child. 'I hate that.'

I started to growl then something better occurred to me. "Share time, huh? Fine! I'll show you share time." I got up and went for the fridge. A nasty smile twisted my lips. I got out Kathy's milk, popped it open, put it to my lips, and started gulping it down paying no heed to the milk spilling down my front as it was pouring faster than I could drink.

Oz I was attracted to Willow before I even knew her name or had even seen her up close. She drew me to her. Our relationship is the longest one I've ever been in. It's been close to three years now and I'm no less attracted to her. I never told her the reason I didn't go to summer school that year was so I wouldn't have to leave her side. She wouldn't have liked it so I didn't tell her. I also didn't tell her the reason I had to go to summer school in the first place was because I'd been planning my delayed graduation from the second month of our dating. She would have been livid over that. I've stayed by her side for all these years and I plan on doing it for as long as I live. I haven't told her that because I don't think she'd want to hear it just yet. When she is ready I will tell her. I will tell her over and over till she believes it. For now I am following her as she walks to her dorm. "You're worried about her."

Willow turned to me startled at the sudden voicing of my thoughts. "Yeah, both of them. I mean, what kind of demon runs around putting ookie blood dreams into people's heads, like some kind of nightmare fairy? It's not right."

"Well, I'm against it."

"And Buffy's completely being not herself," Willow went on, worriedly. "If it wasn't for this English paper I'd be there right now. Um, listening. Doing the girly best friend thing." Willow's kind heart may not be the best spoken but it is bigger than any I have ever seen. We reached her door too soon in my opinion. I wish I could have convinced her to stay at my apartment but she insisted she couldn't. Her parents were paying for her dorm room directly. They would know if she wasn't in it. I'm surprised she would think so. I know how oblivious they are in regards to her and it hurts me because it hurts her.

"Well, I can do that." I can't help the way her parents are but I can help with this. I many not be a girl and therefore it is impossible for me to do "the girly best friend thing" but I am a friend. Besides, it would ease Willow's burden if she didn't have to worry about Buffy.

"You can?" Willow sounded hesitant but also grateful that I would volunteer.

I gave her one of my "Willow-reserved" smiles. "Well, I'm not saying we'll braid each others hair - probably-" I let her think about that one for a moment as the mental image occurred to me as well, "but I can hang with her, watch for signs she's going over the edge."

"You're the best." Willow practically glowed at me. Then she tilted her head in thought. "Oh, she's probably patrolling by now. Check around the science center. If you need me I'll be-" she opened her door and I flinched at the noise from the party. My ears sometimes are far too sensitive for my own good, "-at the library." She turned around and went back the way we'd come. For once I didn't follow her, though I wished I could have. I watched her retreating back until I couldn't see it anymore then turned to get to my own task. I was now Buffy-finder-extraordinaire. I walked the path around the science center, grateful for the lights illuminating it. It made all potential hostiles easy to see. Not that my night vision was shabby. I actually saw pretty well in the dark. However I appreciated the light, every little thing counted when the sun went down in SunnyD. I came alert as a triad approached: two men and a woman. They didn't have the feel of vampires but that didn't really count for much in this town. Vampires weren't the only things to watch for. I walked past them and relaxed when they didn't do anything. Only as I passed I felt something, something that seemed familiar. I kept walking but curiosity made me look back. The blonde woman was looking back and my eyes met her's. I turned around first. Her searching gaze had made me feel uncomfortable. 'Huh.' I thought to myself as I shook her eyes from my mind. It didn't take long to spot Buffy. Willow was right and she was patrolling. In fact she was REALLY patrolling. Inside I winced at the hungry look on her face. 'Taking out her anger by killing things. Not good.' "Buffy," I called to her. She looked up surprised. "Oz. Hi." I gave her a nod. "Hi." I fell in step with her and it was several seconds of painful silence before I realized Buffy wasn't going to talk. It's unusual for me to have to initiate conversation. Buffy usually can go on for hours. I shrugged. "So how are things with you?" That opened a floodgate I'd rather not have and Buffy detailed her latest argument with Kathy. I sort of got lost at the part with popular artists and didn't get found again until.. "...so then Kathy's like, 'It's share time.' And I'm like, 'Oh yeah? Share this!'" Buffy punched the air with enough ump to bowl over a small hippopotamus. I quirked an eyebrow at her. "So, either you hit her, or you did your wacky mime routine for her."

Buffy looked a bit flustered, then she said, "Well, I didn't do either, actually. But she deserves it, don't you think?" She had the look of someone who had just vindicated herself.

"Nobody deserves a mime, Buffy," I said in all seriousness. I had a cousin who was a mime for a month. Worst month of my life. The way Buffy felt Kathy deserved a beating set off an alarm in my head, though.

"Hmm, Kathy does." Her expression was kind of nasty, then it lit with a happy smile as a thought occurred to her. "She deserves to be locked in an invisible box and blown away by an imaginary wind and... and...."

"Forced to wear a binding unitard?" I ventured when it looked as if she wouldn't be finishing her statement any time soon.

"Yeah, the itchy kind, it's perfect." She gave me a huge smile as if relieved that I was with her in Kathy-hating.

"Just here to help." I felt slightly guilty about being here to watch for a break down. I really was here to help though, just not in quite the way she thought.

"Which I appreciate." Her eyes narrowed as she looked at me. 'Uh, oh.' "But you've never come on routine patrol with me before, Oz. So, what's the deal?"

"Seemed more interesting than homework." Which was true as well. Homework is a tedium only to be done as a last resort. I'm a tester, not a homeworker. Too much with the work.

"As long as it's an elective. I can handle myself alone, you know." Her eyes were still narrowed at me. Buffy might not be the most observant but evidently she wasn't the dullest knife in the drawer.

"Not in question." I assured her. Though internally I wasn't so sure.

Buffy nodded to herself. "Good. So then, I go into the refrigerator-- right?--and the label queen has managed to put...."

I favored her with a look. "Just a, just a thought, Buffy, but do you think all this ranting is scaring away potential demons?" Buffy stopped and I joined her in the stillness. "You're right." Her face did that scrunch up thing it does when she's truly angry. "Ooh!" I calmly noted her hands balling into fists. "She's even affecting my work, now. She's the Titanic. She's a crawling black cancer." Her leg shot up in a move that would have made Cordy, Queen of the high kick, proud and swung around to smash it into an innocent park bench. Wood splinters flew and the two wood heaps became formally-known-as-bench. "She's... other really bad things." I turned my gaze back to Buffy but her flashing eyes were focused elsewhere telling me she apparently hadn't noticed the untimely demise of the bench.

"On the plus side you've killed the bench, which was looking shifty," I quipped, trying to cut through the murderous mood hanging around Buffy.

Buffy glared at me and I got the uneasy feeling that if Kathy had been standing behind me my life would have been worth nadda. "This isn't funny, Oz. Something has to be done." She stalked away. I watched her rigid shoulders and noted her terse gate as she moved away from the unfortunate bench and me.

"Agreed," I said softly. I looked at the bench for a final time then began trotting after her. Kathy would make more of a mess than the bench both in the literal sense and in the sense of Buffy's life if Buffy decided to take a heel to her. Kathy 'Darn these nails. And darn her.' I glared over at Buffy who was tapping her pencil on her book. The booms were getting louder with every hit. It was driving me insane. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. Putting the clipper down, I hopped off my bed and strode over to my CD player. I felt a supreme sense of satisfaction as I turned it all the way up then hit play. Cher drowned her out for me. Turning back around, I barely contained my smirk as I folded up on my bed again. Suddenly the tapping was back and I glanced up to see Buffy was hammering her pencil down increasingly hard. I felt a flash of irritation, which was quickly replaced by another flash, this time of smugness, as her pencil snapped. Buffy dropped the pieces of her pencil and grabbed a pair of earmuffs. I curled my lip. 'What kind of person doesn't like Cher?' Choosing to be the bigger person I ignored her slight to Cher. 'I want an egg.' Getting up once again I passed Buffy, who took the time to shoot me a glare, and grabbed the fridge door. Inside I was happy to see were all of my items still neatly labeled. Taking an egg out, I went over to my desk so it'd be easier to clean up the shell fragments afterwards. I began rolling it over and over again on the hard wood trying to crack the whole shell. My name looked rather neat with hairline fractures running through it but sadly to eat the egg I had to de-shell it. 'Bye bye egg.' I began ripping away its covering. A thunk dragged my attention from my egg and I turned to see that Buffy had thrown her muffs down in a fit of pique. "I'm going to bed," she announced like she was the Queen of Siam proclaiming something to her subjects. I glared at her as she got into bed and shut off her light. 'I can't wait till the transfer's complete and I don't have to live with her anymore.' Willow Kathy had ambushed me in the hallway. Now I was trying to think of a polite way to tell her to leave me alone. I needed to get to class. I bounced on my toes and looked around at the passing traffic as Kathy delivered her tirade. "I do what I can, but Buffy's difficult. She's secretive, for one thing, she comes in at all hours of the night, and she leaves her gum all over the place." I knew Buffy had a good reason to be secretive. 'Wait. does Buffy chew gum?'

I shook off that thought. Things sounded bad. I had to try to divert what was starting to look like a full-blown war. "I-it sounds like things are rough, but don't you want to be talking to Buffy about this?" At that moment I saw Buffy coming towards us in the stream of students.

"I would," Kathy protested, sounding very self-righteous, "but she is so touchy about all kinds of weird stuff. I mean sometimes I get the feeling that she is not quite normal. You know?" I was getting nervous with Kathy's pointed questions and Buffy staring at me from the other end of the hall wasn't helping. "Well, normal is relative. Right?" My voice sounded squeaky to my own ears. I turned fully to see Buffy and Kathy followed my gaze.

"Later, ok?" she whispered to me as if I was a fellow conspirator and hurried off. I almost sighed in relief but then Buffy walked up and turned abruptly towards Kathy.

"Why were you talking to her?" Buffy demanded accusingly.

My worry for my friend intensified. "Buffy, come on, we were only just saying hi," I said, trying to calm her down.

Kathy turned around for a second. "Yeah, that's what she wants you to think." Then she was gone but her parting shot enraged Buffy. Buffy continued to stare where Kathy had been, cold fury on her face. Dread filled me as I looked for my friend and couldn't see her in the person in front of me.

"Buffy, this has to stop," I pleaded with all my heart. "I mean I-I get it, I have a sucky roomie, too." I reached out to her, trying to get her to see reason. "But you just have to deal."

Buffy's face lost its rage. It became a determined mask. "You're right, I've been thinking a lot about this and it's clear to me now."

"Good, that's better." I smiled in relief. I'd gotten through to her.

"Kathy's evil." Buffy's words pounded into me like fists. "I'm an evil fighter. It's simple... I'm gonna have to kill her." I stood there in stunned silence for the few seconds it took to fully process that she'd said what I thought she'd said. "You have to kill her?" I couldn't believe those words had come out of her mouth. "Don't you think you could just switch rooms, or something?" I said desperately.

Buffy looked at me as if she was proud of herself. I felt sick to my stomach. She leaned in close. "Well," she said, as if she was letting me in on a grand secret. "I would, but it's not just me in danger from Kathy. Look." She pulled out a plastic baggie containing what looked like toenail clippings? "Toenails?" I croaked out hoarsely.

Buffy nodded as if I'd finally got it. "Evil toenails." That absurd statement didn't sound quite as absurd as it should have because I could see the fanatical gleam in Buffy's eye and knew she was serious. "I took them off the floor last night when she was in the bathroom. She thought I was asleep."

"Good thinking, 'cause in the middle of the night those toenails could have attacked you and left little half-moon marks all over your body," I managed to joke, I don't know how

"Don't be ridiculous," Buffy scoffed. "The point is I measured them before I fell asleep and again this morning, and they grew. After they were cut! That's a demon thing, she has to be eliminated." 'Oh god she thinks she's got proof. What am I going to do?' Thinking fast I decided to do the only thing I could to prevent a homicidal Slayer from killing an innocent person.

"Of course. I-it makes sense, now." 'I can't believe I'm humoring a lunatic.' "But you better show those bad puppies to Giles before you do anything just to be sure." 'I'll call ahead and warn Giles. Maybe he can come up with something to get rid of whatever demony thing is causing this.'

"Absolutely. I don't want to do anything crazy." I almost couldn't believe the craziness of that statement.

"Uh, you hurry on to Giles," I managed to get out with out panicking. "I'll hang here and-" I thought fast. I needed something to keep her from guessing I thought she was under demon influence. Something she'd believe.. "-and keep an eye on Kathy," I finished with only a slight pause.

Buffy didn't notice, she was so caught up in her own confidence of Kathy's evilness. "Great. Good. Thanks, Will." She turned and headed off to Giles and I swear she was swaggering. I watched to make sure she was gone then went for the nearest payphone. I punched in a number I'd memorized between Apocalypses and waited nervously as it rung. 'Come on. Come on.' Relief flooded me when Giles' voice came over the line. "Hello?" "Giles," I practically gushed in my relief, "I-I just talked to Buffy and," I glanced in the direction she'd went, "yeah, I think she's feeling a little... insane." "I know she's been. out of sorts lately but.." Giles said trying in his British way not to say she'd been acting like a bitch. Me, I had no problem saying it. Not now when she was acting much worse than bitchy. "No." I shook my head even though I knew he wouldn't be able to see me. "Not bitchy crazy, more like homicidal maniac crazy. So I told her to come to you. Kay?" I heard Giles take a deep breath then let it out. He didn't say anything for a few long moments and I began to worry that he didn't have any more idea what to do with a homicidal Slayer than I did. And that was not reassuring. Giles was plan guy. He was supposed to have a plan. "That's alright, Willow." His voice was very soft and his accent very pronounced when he finally said something. I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding. "I'll contact Xander and Oz. We'll come up with a way to restrain her until we can find some way to reverse this. You might want to warn this Kathy to lay low for a while as well in case. in case it doesn't work." There was a pause when neither of us could think of anything to say. "Be careful," I whispered to him. I had no clue how Buffy would react to what she'd see as her friend's betrayal. She'd practically ripped my head off when I was just talking to her "enemy". "Yes. Of course. Good luck." Then the dial tone was ringing in my ear. I pulled the receiver from my head and looked at it. "Good luck," I said to it then solemnly hung it back on its hook. Xander I was laying in wait for a potentially unbalanced Slayer. Not one of the smarter things I'd ever done. Still, Oz was waiting with me, along with the ever-redoubtable Giles playing bombardier. Oh yeah that made me feel A LOT better. I've faced a deranged Slayer before; it's not good for the body. I heard a creak as Giles' door swung open and glanced at Oz. Of course he'd heard it too and I nodded to show him I was ready. There were footsteps then, "Giles? Anybody home? Hello?" I heard a muffled thud and knew Giles had dropped the net from his second story perch. 'God I hope he didn't miss.' I took off down the hall, Oz at my side. We reached a struggling Buffy just in time. She almost had the net over her head. Taking a chance, I body slammed into her and Oz followed my example. Giles hauled ass getting down the stairs and helped us get her hands behind her back. Freeing one hand from restraining Buffy I grabbed the slipknot hanging from my pocket. 'Soldier boy strikes again.' I forced the rope over Buffy's wrists.

"What are you guys doing?" Buffy cried, fury and confusion in her voice. "This is... this is ridiculous." She jerked her hands trying to escape the rope but I pulled it back, putting a bit of my real strength into it.

"Buffy, this hurts me more than it hurts you," I told her truthfully. I always assumed if one of us were going to go nuts, well, that it'd be me.

"Not yet, but it will." Buffy's voice was deadly.

"Don't say that," I said. Then her words really penetrated my brain. "Oh, PLEASE don't say that." A Slayer was mad at me, as the Thing would say I was going to be in for a world of hurt.

"We're doing this to stop you from making a terrible mistake," Giles gently assured Buffy as we removed the net and maneuvered her over to a wooden bench with a back. "Clearly something is amiss." I snorted at that statement as I tied the loose end of the rope to the back of the bench. 'Oh yeah, "amiss".'

"Yeah, something's amiss here." Buffy glared at us and jerked forward. "A 'Miss Kathy Newman.'" Her voice was mockingly sweet. "Giles." She jerked again twisting towards Giles. "Ow." She winced as the white nylon rope tightened on her wrists. "Giles, look in my bag." Oz and I shared a worried glance while Giles looked at her for a moment then went over and picked up her bag. "Look in the bottom pocket of my bag." Giles opened the pocket slowly. "She has parts that can grow after they're detached," Buffy insisted as Giles pulled out a baggie with apparent nails in it. "She irons her jeans. She's evil. She has to be destroyed."

Giles motioned to Oz and I and we went off to the side. I noticed he was still holding the baggie, and yep they were nails. "I fear the demon that Buffy met in the woods has somehow possessed her," he whispered to us.

"Lite FM. Love songs. Nothing but love songs. " I heard Buffy muttering to herself.

"You think?" I almost pointed out that it must have taken days for her to get this bad and know one had thought to contact me, just in case she went completely wacko and decided to go on a killing spree, but there was no real point. Even if they'd tried I wouldn't have been available. In fact, they'd been lucky to catch me for this. "Um, you stay and watch her. I-I know a spell that will make the possessing demon reveal itself so that we can fight it, but I-I need to get some supplies from the magic shop." Giles turned to the tied up lady in his living room, which under different circumstances would be really kinky. "Buffy, I... see you around." Giles finished stuttering and left, leaving Oz and I all alone with a mad Buffy. "So anybody want to play I Spy?" Wasn't my best one-liner but at the moment I was busy worrying about when Buffy was no longer tied up. Her glare illustrated quite clearly she was listing ways to kill us in her head. I was hoping she wouldn't think of dismemberment. "I can't believe this, after all that we've been through together and you guys won't believe me when I tell you that Kathy is bad." Buffy spat at us.

"We want to, Buff, it's just..."

Oz interrupted me. "Shh, don't engage." 'I haven't been there. I don't know. Better safe than sorry.' I finished in my head. Buffy started putting a little more effort in her struggles and the bench started rocking. 'Ah, I don't know if those knots will hold against Crazy Slayer.' A slipknot would hold a normal person but watching Buffy I couldn't help but worry. 'Maybe I should tighten them up again and put a little more oomph behind it this time.'

"I don't know if I tightened those ropes enough," I said to Oz.

Oz managed to look concerned. "Then we'd better go over there and check 'em."

I nodded. "Avoid the legs," I advised him. 'Should have bound those too.' We approached from opposite sides. I leaned over to check the ropes. I saw Buffy's arms move free of the bindings but she was too quick for me to duck. My head slammed into something hard and unforgiving and the world began to fade out in a red haze. My body ached as I fell backwards, crashing into the hard wood floor. 'I think she cracked my skull.' I thought fuzzily. Something landed on my chest. "Nope, not tight enough." Buffy's voice drifted down to me and then I was gone. Willow 'I hope this insanity is not catching.' I guess it doesn't really matter. I have to warn Kathy. I raised my fist and started knocking, tentatively at first then harder and faster as my fist became the fulcrum of my fear. I was startled when the door opened. I almost smacked Kathy in the face but managed to check my fist just in time. I took a deep breath. "Can I come in?"

Kathy glanced up and down the hall suspiciously then nodded. "Sure." Kathy stepped back, letting me in. I stood nervously in the middle of the room. She shut the door and turned to me. "Where's Buffy?" The words came out bitter and sort of eager. Inside I groaned at the confirmation that Kathy was being possessed too.

"I don't know, exactly," I fretfully told the truth. 'Hopefully wrapped up at Giles'.' "But I've been thinking, it might be a good idea for you and Buffy to give each other some apart time. In fact, you might want to be, uh, apart before she gets back." 'So she doesn't rip you, ah, apart.'

Kathy glared at me. "What do you mean? I should leave the room? Why should I go?" She started towards me looking as if she was ready to kill the messenger.

'N-not good.' "I-it's not fair, I know," I said, backing up.

"You bet it's not fair," Kathy snorted, doing a fair impression of a raging bull, "having to live with someone who's obviously troubled. Someone who so clearly needs to be in a home, not in a dorm." She stomped her foot down.

"I don't know about that. Uh, Buffy's going through something, yes, but...." I said defending my friend and at the same time trying to defuse Kathy.

"I wouldn't put it past her to drop out, or take off or something." Kathy's eyes took on a speculative gleam. "Do something horrible to herself." Her eyes were almost merry at the prospect. 'Definitely not good.'

"Herself?" I whispered.

Kathy sagely nodded. "Or worse. She's capable of it, you know? You can see it in those shifty little eyes of hers. One of these days she might even push somebody too far." I let out a breath in relief when the phone rang. Kathy went to answer it and I considered what she'd said. Buffy was most certainly capable of hurting people, with her strength, but she'd never hurt a human. okay, she would. At the moment she was under the influence. As for the pushing, the only ones who seemed to be out to get her were the demons that wanted to kill the Slayer before she killed them and, well, Kathy.

"Hello?" Kathy chirped into the phone. She listened for a moment then held out the receiver in my direction. "It's Oz." I frowned and reached out to take it. I put the phone to the ear. "Hi." I was glad to be talking to a non-crazy person. "You don't have to worry. We tied Buffy up for now." Oz's calm voice reached out to sooth my nerves. "You did?" I looked at the ceiling. 'Thank God.' "Yeah. We're at Giles'." My boyfriend, master of the few words. "She's at Giles, uh, ok. Bye." I turned my eyes away from heaven and found Kathy was eyeing me strangely. 'I think I'd better leave before she starts thinking I'm guilty by association.' "Bye." I barely heard Oz as I hung up the phone. I smiled at Kathy reassuringly and started edging for the door. "You know, during that really short phone call I realized you are so right. I mean, it's not fair to make you leave your own room. So, you're good. You just stay, right there. Kay?" I made a break for it, bolting through the door. Raggitt The summoning spell is one of the lengthiest and most mind numbing ever created. Chanting for days is most harrowing and I could not help wishing, in those long hours when nothing was heard but our voices repeating the same passage over and over, that the elders would get around to revising the spell. Finally my partner and I uttered the last words to the spell. Our words were no longer lyrical they were more akin to harsh grating but I sighed in relief at hearing them. Keeping the fire going while chanting had been a real joy and as the ground started shaking I fuzzily worried the spraying dirt would put it out. I wasn't too demon to admit I was dead with exhaustion. Suddenly from the split in the earth Taparrich appeared. His rich black robe designated his higher status. As he towered over me I couldn't help but wonder at the need. He excreted his power. All who stood in his presence would know him. ^Where is She?^ The air vibrated as Taparrich spoke and I was glad that I was not the object of his search, as his wrath was also legendary. My partner made no move. I stepped forward. ^With the humans, my lord. I will show you.^ I said, relieved my voice was recovering and no longer sounded like a human's. I waved my hand, calling the image I had obtained following our prey. The resting place was replicated in careful detail several feet above the ground. Taparrich tersely nodded and made a motion. A traveling portal materialized beneath his feet and he went to bring back his quarry. Kathy I didn't even glance up from my book when Buffy came into the room. I knew it was her. I could smell her. "Kathy." Buffy spat out. "Buffy." I looked up and sneered at her. She disgusted me.

"I think we need to talk, don't you?" I saw her fists clenching and I knew what kind of "talk" she wanted. I wanted the same kind. I swung my legs off my bed and got to my feet.

"Absolutely." I grinned at her. "Let's talk."

Buffy returned my grin and kicked up a corner of the throw rug. I looked down at her deliberate sloppiness and felt a cold rage settle in my stomach.

"Oops, look what I did," Buffy said sweetly. I yanked my head up and backhanded her across the face. Her head jerked to the side. 'Look I can flip things over too.'

"Huh, look what I did," I said, just as innocently. She reached for me and I reached for her. I got a hold of her head at the same moment she got mine. I felt a grim sense of determination fall over me as I prepared to wrench her head off, only to be beaten to it by that wench. I lost my balance as Buffy lost her grip on me and we both stumbled back. The air felt strange on my suddenly exposed and raw face. The light was too bright but I could see my human mask in her hand. Buffy looked down at my very expensive mask then back up at me. "I knew it!" she cried triumphantly, shaking my mask at me in her fisted hand. 'That--that-ooh I'm going to get her!' I charged forward, intent on beating the crap out of Buffy. I hit her around her middle and she flew back into the wall. Before she could move, I straddled her. I wrapped my hand around her throat but she kept struggling. "Quit it!" I said impatiently.

Buffy kept wriggling, trying to buck me off. "I knew it! I knew you were one of those demon things." She spat clawing at my hand.

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, why don't you just stuff it and let me finish my ritual."

"Ritual?" I got some real pleasure out of the confusion on Buffy's face. It didn't last though. "My nightmares.they were real." A little bit of guilt hit me. I might as well explain. "I'm sorry, ok? I left my dimension to go to college and they sent these guys after me. They can tell who I am because I don't have a soul so I'm borrowing yours."

"Without even asking." Her tone screamed how typical and any guilt I felt disappeared. She deserved it. "Tonight, when they come looking for me, they'll take the one without a soul." I gloated.

"Well, thank God I won't have to watch you floss anymore," Buffy retorted.

"And I won't have to live with a slob," I shouted back at her, furious. Suddenly Buffy wrenched beneath me and my hand slid off her throat and up to her chin. She took advantage of the slip and sunk her teeth into my hand. 'Ahhh..' I pulled my hand back, realizing too late that wasn't a good idea. Abruptly I was flying. My back exploded in pain as I landed on the end of the bed. Buffy's foot caused another burst of pain as she planted it in my stomach. I smacked her foot and she fell back away from me. As she scrambled back to her feet, I got to mine. We stood facing each other for a few seconds then Buffy twitched, telegraphing her charge at me. I grabbed her wrist and flipped her over onto the bed she'd thrown me into. I underestimated her and she bounced off using her momentum to deliver a kick to my face then following through with another to my side. I threw a punch but Buffy ducked it and I growled to myself. I was aching all over. She threw a punch of her own that I had to block with my forearm. My whole arm tingled from the blow. Buffy was a lot stronger than she looked. Desperate, I grabbed Buffy's head and threw her back. Buffy flew across the room and through her closet. "It's share time, Buffy," I sang out. I ran over to finish this. Gripping her feet, I pulled her out of the closet. "Fine, let's start with my sweater." 'What?' Buffy twisted her feet out of my hands and got up, her ketchup-ruined sweater in her hands. She flew forward and wrapped it around my neck. I choked for a second as she tightened it, cutting off my air. Then I grabbed the two sides of the sweater and ripped it apart. I smirked as I took a deep breath and Buffy stood holding the pieces of the sweater.

"Oh!" she cried, stunned. I closed my hands around both her arms, picked her up, and threw her back down on the floor. Buffy made to get up and I savagely kicked her face. Still furious, I grabbed the phone and straddled her again. Then I started smacking Buffy across the face with the handset. *Whack* "All you had to do was," *Whack* ",write," *Whack* ",down," *Whack* ",your," *Whack* ",calls!" Throwing the phone aside, I pulled her up by her hair and threw her against my desk. My pencils rattled to the floor. Buffy managed to stay on her feet. "Ah-hah!" she cried and brought her heel down on my scattered pencils. They broke beneath her feet. 'Bitch.' I took a swing at her but she blocked me. Buffy's hands gripped the sides of my head and twisted me around. My jaw exploded as her fist delivered an uppercut. I soared back, crashing into my bookcase. My books scattered and splinters dug into my back. Something was crushed under my hand. I looked down and saw my ceramic dog Fluffy. Rage filled me and I threw myself at Buffy. She was caught off guard and I plowed straight into her and kept going. We crashed into the door, which amazingly held. 'Must be oak.' A muffled shout came through the walls. "Do you mind? People are trying to study!" I picked Buffy up and ran her across the room, slamming her into the window. The glass cracked and broke, leaving Buffy lying on the sill. I grabbed her and pulled her off the sill. "The window's open. Happy?" I threw her again, this time over my bed. She landed against the side of her own. I leapt over to her and started prying at her jaws. "Open up! Let me finish!" 'I need to finish. YES!' Buffy's mouth opened. Xander The top of my head was tingling, that was the first thing that I felt. 'Damn, she smacked me good.' I sat up and immediately regretted it as the room started spinning. I brought my hand up to my forehead to try and ease the pounding. I heard Oz starting to stir beside me. 'Going by the pain I'M in it's a good thing he's a werewolf or I'd have to call an ambulance. Either Buff doesn't know her own strength, which I seriously doubt, or payback really is a bitch.' "Oow... why couldn't Giles have shackles like any self-respecting bachelor?" I winced at the sound of a door slamming. It seemed to vibrate through my brain. Light, yet hasty footsteps told me who exactly was coming, even if they were slightly louder than usual. Definitely Willow.

Willow started babbling even before she entered the room. "Guys, I just saw Kathy and she's acting... Oh my God, are you ok?" She rushed over and helped Oz to his feet. 'What about me?' But Wills ignored me all together, fussing over her boyfriend. 'Boy is she overreacting. Doesn't she remember the whole 'only silver can kill a werewolf' thing?' I shook my head. 'Well I guess I'll just have to help myself up.' I did a quick roll and hop to get to my feet. I felt a slight wave of dizziness but it passed. 'Ah the wonders of an immortal constitution.' I glared at Oz who looked as if nothing had happened to him at all. 'Apparently not as good as a werewolf one.' "Yeah, Buffy's got a pretty good lead on us, though." Oz broke the news to Willow.

Willow blanched as she realized what that meant. "I-I'll call Kathy, tell her to get out of there." She shuffled to the phone and started dialing. She let it ring, and ring, and ring but finally she hung up. Willow turned to us her face grave. "No answer." The door slammed again and a disheveled Giles rushed in the room. "Toenails!" he blurted as if it would explain everything. I was in a big state of non-comprehension. Apparently Giles realized toenails wasn't going to solve it for us and held up a baggie. "Buffy was right." He handed the baggie to Willow. She held it like it was a bomb that would explode if she twitched. "Kathy's toenails not only keep growing after they've been cut, they actually regenerate after they've been destroyed."

Willow squinted at, well the toenails. "And that's a demon thing?"

Giles nodded, "Oh, unequivocally yes. So... where is Buffy?" I held up the piece of rope I had found on my chest, which Buffy had thrown on me when I was down. "Oh dear, we have even less time than I feared." He reminded me of the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, scurrying off for a very important date as he disappeared into his kitchen. Giles began grabbing stuff at what looked like random to me. "I've looked up all known regenerating demons. Only one species practices the ritual Buffy's been seeing in her sleep. It's used to steal the soul from a human body."

"Wait." I held up a hand. "Are you saying that Buffy's been doing a Linda Blair on us because Kathy's been sucking her soul?"

Giles set his stuff on the table. "I believe so, yes. Excuse me, please." He brushed me aside to move some furniture around.

"So Buffy was right all along. Later on, big remorse," Willow said.

Giles picked up a book. "Now, I've found a spell that should reverse the soul transfer procedure immediately." He gave the book to Willow. 'Why is he giving all the stuff to Wills today?' "Willow and I will perform it at once." 'All right. That's a good reason.'

"Leaving Xander and me to help Buffy in the flesh," Oz stated. "Oh yeah, that's what I want to do. Help a Slayer who'd rather play ping- pong with my eyeballs for tying her up and calling her crazy." I shook my head at the absurdity of it. "Well, Dogboy, we're off to save the Slayer, maybe." Oz gave me a rather odd look as I headed out with a smile. 'Don't worry. I'm not insane. I just look that way.' Giles I'd acted as a sort of surrogate father for all of. the Scooby Gang, for lack of a better description. I thought of all of them as the children I'd never had, but Buffy holds a special place in my heart. I'm duty bound to protect her and fight with her. Now because I hadn't believed her she may have lost her very soul. Not something any father wants for their child, I'm sure. I leant over the book I had handed to Willow more to reassure myself than to actually read the necessary words. Trying not to show my nervousness, I turned from Willow and the book and began lighting the candles. Unable to resist I glanced at Willow and saw in her face the same fear and determination I was feeling. Taking a deep breath, I began speaking the words to return our Buffy to us and reverse the spell of the Mok'tagar demon. "'Hear me, elders of the upper reaches... elders of the lower reaches... elders of the dry land... elders of the river flats.'" I took the required pause. "'Ancients, I beseech you. The soul, abstracted. Let it revert to its true seat.'" The pause after this verse was spent swallowing my fear. "'Let it be finished. Let the unnatural vessel be emptied, let the essence be returned to its original host.'" The spell was simple and over. But I had no way of knowing if it was successful.

Buffy My jaws were throbbing along with the rest of me. Kathy was holding them apart, and I knew that wasn't good. Kathy tried to do something but suddenly the white misty thing from my dream poured into me. 'Is that my soul?' I felt more complete than I had in days but sort of like a hand in a new glove, all turned around and not quite filled in yet. Kathy fell off me spent.

"How did you do.... " she demanded weakly. Then there was a flash of light and a vortex opened up and dropped out another bad tan demon. 'Where are all these guys coming from?' I tried to move but found I had less energy than Kathy, who managed to crawl to her feet. ^There you are. Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in young lady?^ The new demon spoke in a funky language, yet creepily enough it seemed to translate in my head. 'Just what I need. More people messing with my mind.'

^I'm not going back!^ Kathy screamed at our new guest. 'And she calls ME rude.'

^Don't take that tone with me.^ he scolded Kathy.

Kathy stomped her foot. ^I'm 3000 years old! When are you going to stop treating me like I'm 900?^

Xander ran into the room followed shortly by Oz. 'What are THEY doing here? I knocked them out!' The demon currently inhabiting the center of my room turned around and roared at the nowhere near dastardly duo. Xander blanched and took a step back. Oz followed suit only without the face. After years of exposure to Oz and his Ozness I wasn't terribly surprised. Ignoring my friends, the demon turned back to Kathy. ^Enough. You're coming home.^ His voice was stern and he gave Kathy no chance to continue their argument. He waved his robed arm and what looked like a black hole to me appeared in the floor. I felt air tugging at my feet. 'I think I'd better move.' Summoning up my strength I crawled around my bed putting it between me and the hole. I turned back in time to see Kathy get sucked in. She screamed the whole time. 'Good riddance.' The other demon calmly stepped in and the hole closed up behind him leaving no sign that it had ever been there. "Now that's the way to travel. No lines. No waiting," Xander quipped. I just stared at him speechless and filled with relief that it was over. Willow Despite everything, Buffy had forgiven us, something I was supremely grateful for. My roommate hadn't reacted so well when she found out I had requested a transfer and was moving out. Buffy was kind enough to give me Kathy's space and the Admin didn't object. Kathy's disappearance was pretty easy to explain to the authorities. Xander suggested we just do what the vamps living in Psi Theta had. He pointed out the cops hadn't looked too closely before and if they thought the vamps were behind it they'd probably just take a few notes then go on their way. Sadly enough he was right. We just cleared out her stuff, wrote a note, called the cops, waited a few days, and gave everything to charity. I'd moved in this afternoon, with the assistance of Buffy and the guys. There was a moment when I ate Buffy's sandwich when I thought she was going to go uber on me but nothing came of it and I got the hint. I guess too many years with Xander the Mooch Master had made me forget some people don't like sharing food. My mom for one has to have everything carefully separated and eaten one thing at a time. Trying to eat something off her plate used to earn me a smack as a child. 'I can live with no touchy my food. At least here I don't have to worry about going deaf at twenty.' I glanced around at my new and much cleaner surroundings. 'Still who would have thought it? A neat freak demon.' I shrugged at the inconsistencies of the universe and cracked open my psychology book. Xander

After the absolutely humiliating way Buffy had knocked me out the day before and everything that had happened in the days before that I felt the need to do something, anything, to get me out of my stinking basement and away from my memories. The walls were closing in on me and I growled at them. I was going to do something before I went completely nuts. I grabbed my trunk, pulling out my 'hunting clothes'. I was going to get all dressed up and spread a little misery around.

The walk to Willy's was uneventful, which just mad my fuse even shorter. I knew I looked like a vamp on the hunt; it was a fact I counted on. I wanted the Sunnydale vamps to feel challenged and the cops' eyes to slide over me. What I didn't realize at the time was that my anger followed me like a crowd and nobody, and I mean nobody, wanted to mess with someone dressed like me in that mood. I swept down the stairs of the Alibi Room in all black, my coat bellowing around me looking like the specter of death looming in for the kill. I was venting. So sue me. Obviously Willy was no stranger to silent visitors. He knew I was there and without turning said, "We're closed."

"Too bad." My voice was cold and hard. Willy turned fear on his face. But the moment he saw exactly who it was that had disturbed him in the middle of the day his face relaxed. That just made me angrier. Clearly he, like everyone else, assumed I was absolutely no threat. The fact that a guy who didn't even know me and was afraid of his own shadow thought I was harmless definitely didn't make me any happier. I lunged for him and before he could take another breath he was hanging a foot off the ground. I took no small amount of joy in seeing the fear return to his eyes. The only reason I hadn't vamped was because I didn't want him to be able to hold that over my head. After all, information was his business. But I really wanted to. Growling deep in my throat, I glared at the miserable excuse for a human wriggling in my hands. "We've got to talk."

Willy

'I need a drink. A BIG drink.' Hands shaking, I reached for a bottle of whiskey I keep under the bar for these occasions. I took a long swig from the bottle to calm my nerves then grabbed a glass. Filling it up to the brim, I stared into the liquid as if it held the answers of the universe.

The elder Harris, a frequent customer here as well as several other establishments in Sunnydale, was a putz and until tonight I had considered the younger one just as much of one. Oh, he had more suicidal tendencies for sure, hanging out with the Slayer, but from my contacts I'd heard he wasn't much in a fight. I snorted. 'Not much in a fight, right. That's why he held me three feet off the floor for ten minutes without even breaking a sweat. I'm never trusting Myke again.' I hadn't considered him a danger when he darkened my door. I pressed the glass against my pounding forehead. I groaned out loud, "I'm such an idiot."

I knew I was damn lucky to still be breathing. I learned early on that dismissing anybody makes the weakest demon ready to fight, it's a male thing, and dismissing the younger Harris almost got my head handed back to me on a platter. 'I don't know what that boy's hiding and I don't think I want to find out.' I shuddered at the images my mind called up. Harris was scary. Scarier than the Slayer for sure. 'At least she has life in her eyes when she beats on me.' It was a good thing he hadn't come just for another round of beat the Willy or I'm pretty sure I'd be sitting here dead. Amazingly enough he had wanted to HIRE me.

Several demons do the same thing but I never imagined a demon killer, let alone one of the Slayers lackey's, ever considering it. It was against their moral high ground. The "good guys" usually beat me, not pay me. Come to think of it, I like this better. 'Fewer bruises and more money, not a bad arrangement.' Some of the conditions were bizarre but not too much if one considered the town they were living in. I was supposed to keep all mention of Harris's activities from all parties or..The boy's glare explained without words that I wouldn't like what would happen and it definitely did provide a vivid fill-in-the-blank for my imagination. He didn't have to worry about me telling the demons, they understand when you get the info beat out of you, but I didn't think they would take kindly to me supplying for both sides. Sighing, I put the bottle away and reached for the coffee. I could hear the first scuttles of the night from below. 'Still whatever puts bread on the table.'

Jennifer Lowery

'I can't believe it. She had the nerve to tell me what to do! She's not even my real mom!'

I slammed the door and crashed face first onto my bed, taking out my frustrations on the bedsprings. I gazed down at the book in my hands struggling for a moment to decide what to do. 'To heck with it. I'm twelve years old. I'm not a baby any more.' Flipping to the page I had read over and over, I started reciting the words at a shout.

"ZXOERTA, OHIS. MOREAT. MOREAT!" I heard banging outside my door but I just ignored it. It was just my stepmother again. I could barely hear her over the din and what I could make out didn't faze me.

"WOAT MI FE OUMTIS. MOREAT! MOREAT!" I wouldn't have to listen to her much longer any way. I grinned as a green glow started pulsating in the corner. Not for very long at all.

Megan Lowery

'That little witch! She's at it again! I knew I should have sent her off to boarding school as soon as her father bit the dust but they cost money. This time she's not going to get off so easy.'

I lost my temper once more as my miserable stepdaughter shouted more gibberish. Gritting my teeth I pounded on the door. "You stop this right now, you wretched thing. I've had enough! You're a freak and I'm getting rid of you. Your father wasn't that loaded!" It suddenly got quiet and I smiled in satisfaction. 'Little twerp at least knows when to shut up.' I sighed. This was more work than I'd expected. Best bet probably was boarding school. A smile curved across my features. 'And it will leave me available to find the next sucker.'

Thinking all was right again and mentally planning for the call to Switzerland tomorrow, I turned away from my stepdaughter's door. Then the screaming began.

Officer Randolph

"Man that stinks." The stench rolled over me as I stepped into the crime scene. At first I was occupied with pulling a handkerchief out of my pocket and covering my nose. Then I focused on the sight before me. I grimaced in disgust and stepped lightly around the corpses, making my way over to Stein. Automatically I noted both looked female, what was left of them anyway. Both bodies were covered in a green slime and looked chewed on. The younger girl was lying on the floor near the bed and the older woman had been pulled in, if the way the rug was scrunched up was any indication. I tilted my head and considered the slightly less mauled woman and then shook it. 'What a shame. She was hot.' I nodded to Stein who was holding his nose. Inwardly I grinned. 'Bastard.' He briefly looked my way then turned back to the scene. 'Man thinks he's so great.' I snorted at the detective's holier-than-thou attitude. He glanced at me again. 'He couldn't find his ass with both hands and a map.' Finally he sighed and turned to me.

"Wild animals this time?" I nodded. If you removed the green slime it was even more believable than usual. He nodded as well. "Who should we call?"

"Ben's on vacation."

"I guess Jack gets this commission then." We made our way out of the bloody mess. I heard him mumble. "Clean up's such a mess."

I nodded again. 'That's for sure.' Behind us a wind blew shut an open book lying on the floor. It was probably the last book an unfortunate and naïve young girl had read. The cover read in bold lettering CONJURING.

tbc....