Dearer Reader,

A dwarf on stilts. Normally I would not even respond to an accusation of such an obviously fallacious nature so obviously intended as a cheap ploy for attention. This particular claim, however, is of such a disturbing nature as to warrant my hacking into the ff.net system using the power of my cool ring in order to post this response to Vindalfr's vicious and unprovoked character smear.

Any individual with common sense and a basic understanding of Old Norse will easily be able to see through Vindalfr's story. He claims to be a dwarf, yet goes by the ridiculous name of . I have yet to see that one in any dwarvish baby name book. Dwarves don't give their children anything with in the name. Well, actually, they do. But they tend to be things like and . And you wondered why they kept their secret dwarf names secret.

Two very valid objections have already been voiced by intelligent reviewers. I commend your excellent powers of observation. First of all, Círdan is not pronounced , it is pronounced . Anyone who writes about an elf called Sirdan either has an extremely bad memory and an even worse case of ignorance or, as would seem more likely, has never actually heard the name before and is in dire need of a crash course in phonetics before he or she again attempts to defraud the general public. Furthermore, this Vindalfr pretends to be unable to properly spell commonly used words such as and and yet gets in all of his ticky-roof-u-marks right where they should be. It would seem to me that Vindalfr is pretending to be slightly stupider than he (or, for that matter, she) really is.

Then there is the very obvious problem of the dubious authorship of this Voluspa book, if it really exists at all or is merely a product of Vindalfr's rather imaginative imagination. Where did this Voluspa come from? Who wrote it? I don't know, you say, no one knows who wrote it. This is exactly my point. Are you seriously willing to accept the authority of some poem that for all you know simply turned up on someone's doorstep one day, written by who knows what criminal mind? Is this truly the state of academic integrity in the world today? Ah Arda, Arda, to what have you come?

Yours ever so truly,
Gandalf the Grey,
Mithrandir,
Tharkûn,
etc. etc.