------------------------------------------------------------------------- * Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction * Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction * Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction * ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Switch: Herbs and Spices (Chapter 04 / 22) by Nikholas "Switch" F. Toledo ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Please do remember that Ranma 1/2 is a trademark and a copyright of and by some big name people and companies I am not even worthy to introduce. Anybody who says that I took any of their stuff better not find me hiding. Also, great thanks to whoever reads this and likes it, good thanks to whoever reads it anyhow, and teeny thanks to whoever saw this. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Day 1 The Light on the Fourth Floor Nodoka was baking a set of cookies for her neighbors to eat as a gift for seeing the house for the time she'll be at the Tendos'. While waiting for the oven to signal her, she was reading up on her international news. Her index and pinkie fingers were twirling themselves upon a strand of loose bangs, and she noted that they had been starting to straighten again. She sighed. She would have to have her coif set again. No matter. There'll be time for that. The oven pinged for her attention, and she hurriedly extracted the latest batch of goodies, which she then put into a small tray. Counting pieces, she realized that she had planned to make a last batch of sugar tidbits for the children of her neighbor, which they loved co much. She moved to the crate she had hoarded in order to claim the half-dozen eggs she needed when she suddenly realized a peculiar thing: some eggs were missing. She was sure they had been there earlier, and that she hadn't used any unaccounted for. Maybe she had misplaced them. She absently took note of it for later investigation. Out in the rain which had suddenly fallen in sunny summer Nerima, two females ran drenched into an overhang. They began to systematically dry their hair as they waited for the sunshower to pass. Akane was trying very much not to get annoyed. "I knew I should have brought an umbrella," she said. Her companion shrugged. "Good one." She gave the redhead a cleaving look which prompted momentary silence. It didn't help any at all, and none would be the better. They both knew that. A silent drizzle began to trail. She sighed to tilt her head skyward. It was a brilliant sunshower, where the sun's still out to catch each droplet in mid-air and give it a slightly crystalline look. She must have cocked her head to one side because Ranma-chan had sidled up ever so cautiously. She permitted herself a small smile before the sneeze caught her by surprise. A fit of déjà vu filled her when she felt the muscular arms of her fiancée embrace her form. A haze of red began to form, only to be stifled by the look on the smaller girl's face. She turned her gaze skyward once more to wonder when the rain will end, and as the arms cradled her waist to offer some of the warmth she needed, she hoped it wouldn't for some while, some while. Nabiki had gotten home just before the downpour, but she was still drenched. She caught Soun preparing bleary-eyed for a tragically delayed lunch. Leaving him almost in tears in the waiting room, she phoned for an order of six teriyakis on rice with the payment on delivery to the Tendo dojo. You know, the one near the high school, across the fenced walk near the river? Good. As soon as she had dropped the phone, Mr. Saotome entered rudely. He looked left and right and saw Soun near tears. Knowing all too well that his friend would be beyond words at this point, he aimed his sign at the female. Where is he? he said. "If it's that son of yours you're looking for, he should be coming home from Dr. Tofu's. What's got you so riled?" she said, catching her breath. Nodoka's coming. Oh, so that would be it. She wasn't very surprised. "Then I'll just make sure that he finds out before any incidents can occur," she concluded, grabbing an umbrella. "He's probably changed for the situation already," indicating the weather. Thank you said the panda, setting himself upon the task of drawing his friend back to the living, not exactly realizing that he was slated to pay for their lunch today, as Nabiki left for her best sources of income. Finally, as sudden as it had appeared, it had passed. Ukyo had briefly left the customers to take care of the fallen teen. She brought him up to her waiting room upstairs. After she had set him up with a towel on his forehead, she felt necessary to close shop early. The people were audibly disgruntled, but mostly did not argue the assessment of the management. After quickly tidying up the stalls and the grill, she closed the doors and the windows, and went up to check on her charge. The sunshower had barely shown itself than it passed, giving Ukyo the mild assumption that there was peace in the world. But, in her mind, there was only turbulence and questions. She pulled out an electric fan to cool the passed-out wanderer. Then she started to undo his footwear. This latter maneuver unfortunately required that she partly undo his pants, which she did with little delay. She just hoped that he wasn't going to wake up on him just yet, because after what he's gone through, his poor little brain couldn't handle the attention, not to mention his overworked ego. For the moment though, introspection was required. So, on the couch nearby, she promptly, but properly, fell asleep. Shampoo did not exactly believe her luck. For one, the first eggs she had chanced upon belonged to her mother-in-law. She didn't actually believe that this in itself was a good thing. She knew that her husband-to-be was not showing himself to her yet, and it wasn't easy for him to do so. Neither was it easy on his mother, but it was the way it was. It was the type of thing that only he and his father could resolve, and so some deception was in order to acquire the needed foodstuff. After all, what's six eggs when she's ready to provide their bloodline with good and strong children? Surely any woman can appreciate that. Secondly, she couldn't find him. She saw only the stupid stick-boy and the mustached father of Akane. She was a bit annoyed to think that they could be together as they sometimes were, but she had checked the clinic and there was only the doctor acting funny, and Akane's nice sister. They couldn't be at the school. So she just kept jumping up and down with the food in a steam container when the rain passed by. She cursed the goddess of the rain with her poor timing when the oven jumped her. Tsubasa didn't exactly believe his luck, either. Here was some free food, with just a cat beside it. He was wondering where the nicely curved female he was following went, as he sort of lost her because it was hard to jump while wearing an oven, but this will do. He opened the grill door to gather the dumplings, not noticing that the cat was heating a kettle of water. Shampoo was sure that she was going to kill this girl. She was eating the love dumplings she was going to give her future groom, which she had to borrow eggs for. The pangs of defeat began to twitch her changing muscles. Frustration was starting to bubble as she began to wear the skimpy oriental dress she had brought along with the kettle, and was slightly glad that summer rains in Nerima only lasted seconds counted on two hands. She slid gracefully to her opponent to establish the exchange of blows properly: with a kiss of death. Quickly was it done, so that bloodshed could occur, as this was mostly what was on her mind, beside the queerness of the opponent. So it totally took her off guard when her opponent stared at her with great big doe eyes. Tsubasa was stunned. There was this total knockout of a babe that was modeling some form of lingerie/swimsuit that was thinking of revealing enough of her to leave one in traction. And the first thing she did was kiss him! Not only was she a great body, but she had an eye and fashion sense to boot. He gratefully took her hand in his and asked politely, "what is your name?" The Amazon was wondering what had gone wrong. Her recipe was only supposed to make whoever ate the dumplings fall in love with the first member of the opposite sex he/she will encounter, no big deal. Kid's stuff, really. Something terrible had happened. "What you talking about?" She tried to move slightly out of range of the range. The girl just moved with her, never losing her grip on the warrior- maiden's hand. "But, my beauteous silk-skinned one..." This was something Shampoo had to refer to her great-grandmother. "So sorry, must be going," she muttered and flew into the air. Not to be outdone, Tsubasa followed once more. Nabiki had used the excuse to leave the house once more in order to set the matters of the rather extreme events of the morning into clearer focus. She passed by the park to check if her contact was there, and, sure enough, there he was. He was entirely nondescript. Nothing could be said about his features, save for the fact that there was nothing out of the ordinary. She stood near the bench he was sitting on and said, "it was there." He stood up. She had the most distinct feeling that the conversation, like all conversations they had, were completely under his control. "So it was." He looked her in the eye. "You did do as I asked, should the money be there." At that, she blushed ever so lightly. "Yes." He slightly sagged, as if the news served to depress him instead of elate him. "You'd like to know what you did that for." Again, she nodded. He sighed inwardly. "You've been doing some of the reverse engineering. You should be able to find out what would happen." Nabiki said, "I've gotten the two together." He nodded. Nabiki was about to ask, but his hand silenced her. "It is important that they get together now, instead of later." She could only ask, "But why do they need to get together now?" He only looked at her askingly, as if to pose the same question to her, leaving Nabiki to ponder the possibilities she could have not considered. The two left for their destination in silence. It was just a small game they had, to figure out who would break this fragile mood, and how long this comfortably warm non-verbal interaction would last. They actually made it to the road which leads straight to the dojo grounds before anyone dared to speak. "I'm hungry." Ranma-chan immediately considered the effects of having said I'm hungry at this point in time. He had quickly ditched the okonomiyaki through the ever efficient Saotome digestive system, and now he regretted it. But he had to hide it from Akane. It would have precluded their slightly weak moment earlier. But whenever Ranma would mention his need for sustenance, he felt he would immediately be assaulted by the fawnings of one or (usually) more of his fiancées would jump at the chance to outdo all the others, claiming that this would be the ultimate proof that she was the one for him. It was usually either martial arts or cooking in which the four would fight over him for. He was having slight problems accepting that, even though she was greatly lost in either compared to the others, he still chose Akane. It wasn't the practical choice, nor was it actually the wise choice. He just knew somewhere deep down that it was the right choice. Now how was that for sappy? He stared at the one he cared for. What would happen if he had lost her? He wouldn't know. He tried not to think about it, as often as it almost happens. He admitted to himself that he didn't want to know. He felt a kinship to her. She was his, and he hers, and there was nothing that could shake him from that. Not Mikado. Not Ryoga. Not Shinnosuke. Not even Kuno. Not his other fiancées. And definitely not Kodachi. He honestly did not know what to do without her by his side. If only they could see that together. He just waited for the reaction his statement evinced. Akane pursed her lips as they walked the damp road. She dared not to speak, for fear of words which could bind them, words which could tear them at each other. It always came to these, words. Little nothings in all senses of the word. What would happen to words if you hear them backwards? They lose meaning. How can we go on like this? She stole a glance at the pretty face which held her at a loss at times. What kind of poetry could the old masters write which could involve us without gender? The tomboy and the half-boy/half-girl. Not a he nor a she, but a you and an I. We were meant to come together now, here. The real and the mystic. Like some uncommon sort of soulmate, the complement of the other, yet reflecting one another. She wondered slightly. She was romantically thinking about him. It was delicious irony, but it was too dear to her for her to dismiss. He was always there for her, even though she felt... undeserving. He would never leave her. But, how would life be if he was here with her, forever? After all those times when trouble would lead to him. Could they be able to stick it through? With all these people keeping them apart, and pushing them together. They were just fighting all external forces. How did he really feel? How did she really feel? Would it be the right thing to happen? Would there be the right words to say? She closed her eyes to hear his voice. "I'm hungry." The man woke up again, with his head ringing. The way the light crept into the room told him that it was very close to lunchtime, and that it will rain very recently. He blinked a bit, then breathed in deeply. He stood up to the window, then closed the blinds. He then went to the light switch, to get a handhold on the amount of light at least. Nothing. He groaned. The switch was busted, he forgot. Stupid, stupid. Wheedling to the window, he slid the venetians slightly, so as to provide just the amount of light needed. He remembered to keep tabs on the date, and today was the day he was supposed to meet with Nabiki. Another groan. He won't make it if he didn't hurry up. He's just glad he won't get caught in the rain. Nerima always had rain. Shampoo didn't exactly know where to run. This girl was more trouble than she was worth. Whenever she would try to turn around to assail the overeager poseur, she'd have gone into a different guise. Then, when she thought she was safe, the girl would jump out of a nearby tree or garbage can. This was starting to stink, too. Down the road she barreled at cheetah speed. Luckily no one was near enough to be barreled down, or else they'd grab a hefty helping of Chinese. She thought of going down the road, when she realized that this was where the Tendo dojo was. She almost was able to pass by the fence when a fire hydrant slammed into her. They fell into the river. How predictable, they thought, oblivious to the commotion for the moment. Akane and Ranma-chan heard and saw the splash of water, as they had been on the self-same road. They quickly ran to the action, which had started building a chokepoint on the path. At the scene, they saw Tsubasa (in a ruined fire hydrant costume) holding an oriental dress of sorts. He was crying, "she's naked! I must clothe her before anyone can defile her body with lascivious glances," and ran through the other side of the road. This scene flew through Ranma's brain (with only the mild essence of: Tsubasa seems to talk like Kuno now, is he dressing up Chinese, too?), as Akane quickly summed up the logical course of action: "Let's go, Ranma." This, of course, was due to the pinkish cat she held in her arms, screeching and scratching. She, of course, kept this from her houseguest's (or is it, housepest?) eyes and ears. Not too successfully, though. "What was that?" Akane feigned ignorance. "What was what?" Ranma-chan cocked her head. "Nothing. I just thought it was..." Akane took the phrase. "Nothing." Ranma-chan glanced at her. It could have gone well, too. They just went ahead, the girl in red on the fence, and the girl with the cat slightly behind. She whispered, "we'll talk about this later, Shampoo." The pink cat just made a tiny screech, and continued to protest. Mousse woke up. He opened his eyes. Nothing. A muttered curse that ended up as a sound like that of a crumpled clarinet confirmed the worst: he was, in fact, a duck. He sometimes wished that he had some sort of fastening for his glasses like that of Mr. Saotome, so that they wouldn't sneak up and away from him. He tried standing, but his wings were kept where they were by some unseen force. He felt sure of only a few things: someone was planning to cook him, and it wasn't either Shampoo or Cologne. The latter meant mainly that this was no dream. He was sure of it because he could hear the slashing motions made by the butcher's knife being tested for sharpness. Most Chinese recipes he knew the Amazons used involved using unprepared meat and fowl. No, this chef was planning to chop his head off before dressing him. No, this was not the way a good day would be going. "What did you say, Saotome?" Soun bellowed to the panda practicing looking innocent while playing with a beach ball. The panda fished around for something. He withdrew the sign which said "Nodoka's coming", and flashed it at his host. In turn, Tendo bugged his eyes out. Much as Nodoka was a welcome guest, lately, it never brought any good out of the house. Or in it, for any matter. "When?" Don'know was the reply. Soun started to show large veins on his forehead while speaking. "So you're planning to take your son with you on a training trip, just to avoid the heat, knowing very well that the Master could strike at any point?" At that, the panda quickly hid the backpack he had recovered for his cursed family members. Now, that you think about it... Tendo sat cross-legged looking at the panda. "And until then, you'll just be doing that, eh?" The panda nodded, returning to rocking a tire. He also nearly avoided a few neatly thrown tables. When the delivery man arrived, Soun left the unconscious "bear" floating face-down in the pond, betwixt strewn table entrails. Sasuke was really glad that he had snooped on the Amazons earlier. It's been a while since he's cooked Peking duck, that he really wasn't sure that he was going to do it right. But, oh joy of joys! Here he was with a duck he just picked up on the street in the marketplace on the way back. The duck was high-quality meat, with good stuffing. It was kind of heavy as well, too heavy for a mere duck, which made him kind of wonder. What was kind of weird, though, was when he picked the waterfowl up, it was wearing a set of glasses. At least, that was what it looked like. He kept the latter for later inspection. (a ninja doesn't just return objects picked up, they have to check it, you know?) He was playing with a butcher's knife. He could remember someone warning him not to play with sharp objects, but being in the servitude of the Kunos, it was unavoidable. There would be times when he would have to clean a set of hoops which had dulled due to hitting posts in gymnastic rings, or sets of grass-cutters (with black-tinted clippings) or razors. A butcher's knife was one of the more safe things he's handled recently. He was also swinging it in mid-air, making slicing motions. That was the traditionally martial-arts way of testing snappiness and sharpness, if there was a whoosh of air filling in a vacuum, or a sharp hiss. Why, in China, they'd test the sharpness of their weapons by simply slicing through the air, as the air over there was hard enough to sink your teeth into. Smirking, he chopped at the head of the duck. The man woke up. He tried to flick on the light, as the blinds were drawn. He flipped it on. Nothing. Oh well, that would explain the new bulb yesterday. He drew the blinds open. The streets were only slightly damp. He yawned. He rolled up into bed.
