-------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction * Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction * Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction *
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Switch: Herbs and Spices (Chapter 17 / 22) by Nikholas "Switch" F. Toledo
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Please do remember that Ranma 1/2 is a trademark and a copyright of and
by some big name people and companies I am not even worthy to introduce.
Anybody who says that I took any of their stuff better not find me
hiding. Also, great thanks to whoever reads this and likes it, good
thanks to whoever reads it anyhow, and teeny-weeny thanks to whoever else
even saw this. The seeds of the righteous... never mind. It's Day 3.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------



 Seventeen Myths and Legends



 Kasumi slowly went over to Akane's side. "Are you sure you're
okay?"
 With tiny eyes set in the space of a hopeful, eager, lonely face,
Akane wordlessly nodded.
 A hearty, heartfelt hug by the elder sister conducted her own
thoughts, and when they broke contact, Akane's tears rolled down slowly,
silently. The young Tendo bit her lip just to show Kasumi-neechan that
she, too, would learn to live through change.
 Nabiki sat, eyes outward, towards the outside of the large room.
Kasumi sat down next to her, and she whispered, under her breath, "I
think he's worried about the money."
 "Oh" was all Kasumi said. Father never talked about money. But
there he was, eyeing a tightly-rolled wad of paper.
 Kasumi followed Nabiki as she stood and crossed the floor to the
back door of the dojo, silently with her eyes. The younger girl soon
returned with a wooden parcel. Kasumi almost gasped in recognizant and
sudden horror.
 "B-but, Nabiki!" she said with alarm.
 Nabiki shook her head sharply, long, thin plaits accenting the
action. The glance said that she knew what she was doing, while the look
asked that Kasumi accede the gesture.
 Kasumi knew that Nabiki was never one for frivolous action. She
nodded slowly, and followed Nabiki to the door, which the latter closed
to a crack.
 Nabiki sat perpendicular to her father, nestling the box in her
lap. Soun had quickly kept the wad, eyes averted and moist.
 "Daddy," Kasumi heard the middle Tendo say, "let's play shogi."

 "Let's play shogi," she repeated, not quite rolling it around the
tongue, but not quite sure what it meant. She was sure that it did not
mean that the man - the boy - before her wanted to play shogi.
 "Yeah." He looked nervous, trying to casually run a hand through
his scalp. She had a brief flash of insight, imagining him with a bald
pate. After realizing that it would probably give him the effect of
looking more manly, more masculine... more serious, she decided to add
flowers growing out of nooks and crannies. She giggled in response,
inwardly, of course.
 "What's so funny?"
 She covered her mouth. "I was wondering if you called for me just
to ask if we could play shogi."
 It looked as though he hadn't caught her drift when he replied, "O-
of course, Nodoka... wh-what else - ?"
 Nodoka actually had to still his lips with hers. He melted in her
arms in a gesture they had to make full use of the wide-sleeved kimonos
her parents always wanted her to wear. They were so queer in their old-
fashioned nature - if they saw her kissing him, they would probably be
halfway to the shrine. That, or they'd be chasing him out of Japan.
 "Oh." He took a second more to recover, half from shock, half from
disappointment - the kiss had so much room for company. "So... they're
not home..."
 She shook her head in agreement. "What did you REALLY want us to
do, then, hmm?"
 Continue that kiss, something inside him said. He cleared his
throat, immediately discarding the saliva for that statement. "A-
actually..." He recomposed himself, taking her smaller hands in his.
"Actually, I just wanted this time alone with you."
 She knew that tone of voice her had. The wistful lilt, one he
never used unless... "Happo-"
 "Don't." He nodded, understanding.
 She sighed. "You know... you're going to have to make a choice
sometime soon."
 He nodded again, and started to realize that he actually needed to
elaborate more than just simple assent. "Actually... we're already sick
of the little lecher. He's just too good, and he's got that fire burst.
Who knows, one of these days, we might just tie him up and leave him in a
cave somewhere..."
 She frowned, ever so slightly. "You know that's not what I mean."
 He scratched his nape, and tried to cover his cover-up with an
expression of utter incomprehension. It didn't work. "I... I know,
Nodoka..."
 They left it at that.

 "... just leave it like that, okay?"
 "Okay, Doctor..."
 The doorbell rang.
 Tofu tried to stop smiling like a damned fool, and wiped his
glasses clear of the fogginess. Quickly turning from his patient, he
went to see who was at the door.
 "Hello there... why, it's you, Mr. Tendo!"
 "Hello, Dr. Tofu... where's K-?"
 "Father!" Kasumi ran out of the clinic clean into her father's
waiting arms.
 Tofu marveled at her carefree energy. "Easy, easy... don't use
that foot too much, now."
 "Yes, Doctor," she apologized. She was much too happy to see her
father. To Soun, he requested, "please, at least for a day or two."
 He nodded, and brought his eldest in his arms. He would have given
her a piggyback ride, except that she was still in that yellow leotard.
"Better not let your mother see that, y'know..."
 Tofu sighed. He knew what this feeling was, he just didn't know
where it would lead...

 Kasumi knew that it would lead to this. It didn't mean she had to
like it.
 Of course, she didn't mind the fact that finally, finally, Akane
and Ranma had reached the agreement that she knew would have come out of
it. Of course, she didn't expect it this morning, in the dojo, with both
of them in a high degree of nudity.
 With a quick compromise, she quickly summarized the feelings she
had on the matter: "oh my." She moved to Akane's position and coaxed
Ranma-chan-cat off of his favored position. Nabiki pulled a towel onto
Akane, which the latter wrapped around herself with some difficulty.
 Soun was already in a world of his own, busying himself with
something behind the stage.
 Ranma mewed quizzically, as though just realizing that his bride
was away. Kasumi stared at him and softly but no-nonsensically scolded
him: "You've been a bad boy, Ranma."
 "Mew?" Ranma asked, then groomed his red mane back slightly.
 "Oh, I don't want to know where that tongue of yours has been,
you." She had the ghost of a frown. "You're not planning to leave my
sister, are you?"
 "Mew?" Ranma knew that this nice lady was not Akane, but was
tolerable... at least she reminded him of food. He smelled around her
hands to find if she had brought any.
 "I hope you mean that," she murmured. With that, she picked up
Ranma under his arms, and went back into the house.

 Under the light of the rising sun, Tatewaki Kuno finally made his
way through the streets of Nerima to the Kuno Estate. "Hehheehhheeh...
at last, the immovable gates of my family's towering mansion." He took a
look at the instant ramen cup in his hand. "At last... I, Tatewaki Kuno,
can secure the long and prosperous future of dating the beauteous Akane
Tendo... ah-hah... eh-heh... BWAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-!!"
 Because the immovable gates of the Kuno Estate were, indeed, not
immovable, the proud sign which bore the even prouder family name of the
Kuno clan proudly knocked the all-too proud skein of the Kunos out cold.

 She looked as knocked out as they come. The foreigner looked kind
of distraught, thoughts of lawsuits and really large bills for
translators shaking him silly. The bokken looked none worse for the
wear, considering that it was made of rather durable wood, and it had
come into mortal contact with a less durable human head.
 "I didn't see her! Tell me she's all right! TELL ME SHE'S ALL
RIGHT!" He turned to his companion and pulled the other man's collar.
"TELL ME!"
 THAT tells ME, the other man thought, to steer clear of loopy
martial artists. He would've shook his head if it wasn't being shaken by
the loopy martial artist in question. At least... what's this...?
 The men stopped as the woman groaned, a sure sign of life, as well
as a sure sign of not-knowing-what's-going-on. "Well," the first one
said, "Iguesseverything'sallright,sorryaboutthebumpg'bye!" - he really
did hate bills.
 Let the Guide go, turn, run aw- "Wo ai ni..."
 "Wha-?"
 *kiss*
 The woman ended up back on the ground, this time cushioned by the
confused mass of the foreigner. The pudgy Jusenkyo Guide merely shook
his head ruefully... "aww... very tragic story, of man who beat Amazon
with bokken on head, just two minute ago. Whoever outsider man beat
womans of Amazon tribe, must marry her." He grinned lopsidedly, "very
tragic story."

 "But it's true, I tell you!"
 "You must be batsy. First, you see that alligator in the river,
now you're telling me there's this mob of girls prowling town looking for
some guy and it isn't Ranma Saotome?"
 "Sure shootin'. Someone named 'Sasquatch' or somethin'."
 "You must be drunk agin."
 "Hell, no! I'm as sober as your twin... or his twin... or..."

 "Mousse!"
 "M-M-Mo-Mother!" That was strange. What was Mother doing in the
room where he and Kasumi were? He vanished the jar Kasumi brought, while
Kasumi herself seemed to have disappeared.
 Apparently, she was baking a cake. She was wearing a 'piyo piyo'
apron, but wasn't Kasumi going to use that? "Mousse, call your twin
brother so that we can start the party."
 Oh God. The party. When was the last time he saw his brother? Or
worse yet, his sister? S'been ages since...
 "Mom?" A decidedly male voice came in.
 "Mother?" Another voice, female.
 "Where have you two been, we've been looking around for so long!
Quickly, the candles will burn into the cake if you don't blow..."
 Mousse turned, almost the same time as his twin...
 "Yo." Ryoga blew the candle flame into his face. And to his side
was their little sister, Kasumi.

 She rummaged through her locker for something he could wear.
"Ranma... you're a bit smaller than Akane..." She pulled out a green
leotard. "I think this one will fit you better."
 "I ain't wearin' no leotard, okay?" Ranma fumed in his still-damp
Chinese shirt.
 The eldest Tendo girl kept her calm tone. "It wouldn't look good
if you didn't wear anything to the fight with Kodachi, right, Ryoga?"
 Ryoga looked up, surprised. "Uh, right..." He took the leotard,
Ranma, and opened the door, shoved the former two out, and closed the
door, shouting, "Ten minutes, in the dojo, Ranma!"
 For a moment, their eyes locked, and Kasumi felt her breathing
synchronize with Ryoga's, as the latter slowed his own heartbeat.
 "Ryoga..."
 "Wh-what is it?"
 Kasumi seemed contrite. "I'm sorry for the other night."
 "What?" Now what was this - oh. "It's okay, honest. I'm sorry
that I came barging in so late at night." Even if it was to wring
Ranma's neck. Wait. Something was bugging him earlier... what was it?
Oh, yeah... "Kasumi, could I ask you something?"
 Kasumi turned from the closet, which she had just closed. "What
about?"
 "You... you do rhythmic gymnastics?"
 She shook her head. "I used to, and not the martial-arts type.
I'm afraid that I couldn't teach Ranma or Akane anything of use."
 "I-it's okay." Ryoga was still coiled, tense. "Is... is the Tendo
School of Martial-Arts training Rhythmic Gymnastics?"
 "No. It's Anything-Goes... why do you ask?"
 Ryoga sagged, relieved. Later on, he realized that Kasumi was too
dangerous to be around: given any extended duration of proximity, one
was too inclined to divulge deep, dark secrets to the gentle homemaker.
At that point, anyway, he said, "it's just that I'm trying to avoid
contact with any girl trained in Martial-Arts Rhythmic Gym... my parents
- well, my mom, anyway - well, sort of... forces me to fight any heir of
a Rhythmic Gymnastics dojo."
 Kasumi puzzled over the idea. "Why would your mother force
you...?" The question died as the reason, the only true logically
twisted reason shone.
 Ryoga nodded. "Meet Ryoga Hibiki, heir to the Hibiki School of
Martial-Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics."

 "Rhythmic gymnastics, you say?" Tsubasa admired the sleek
musculature before him.
 Make that above him. Kodachi was gripping the wooden framework of
the ceiling, giving Tsubasa an interesting perspective of her backside.
She turned her head, and winked, "'come into my parlor,' said the spider
to the fly."
 Very, very, very carefully, Tsubasa stood on top of and quite close
to the edge of the king-sized bed just beneath the Black Rose. "What
fly?"
 Kodachi edged on to hover near the center of the bed. "Oh...
that's right. You're not wearing a fly..."
 The drummer complied, treading to center. "I don't see a thread of
silk on you, either..."
 Kodachi make several quick hand motions, the outcome of which was
her eventual fall, landing squarely into Tsubasa's arms. The latter
barely had time to compensate the weight, and the bed lacked the firma in
the terra underfoot, though it did break their fall softly.
 So it was at that, Tsubasa embracing the gymnast perpendicularly.
Kodachi was able to take full advantage of her companion's slight yet
well-toned musculature. Leaning into the cusp of his shoulder, she could
smell the faint bittersweet musk mingled with her own calling out, all
edging over the base smell of acrylic resins. She nuzzled his arms with
her back and her playfully squirming legs, all to lather him, to find his
weak spots, but she couldn't find any.
 He, on the other hand, merely relaxed his back, ever so slightly.
He had crumpled forward to ease the fall, and tilted his precious cargo
toward him. Now that he was flat on his back, he felt her body ground
into his, lightly, fragrantly, as though she break into a million pink
rose petals. The flowing tresses, the pert roundness, the softness of
her end, and the silken continuity of her... he was in ecstacy.
 It was perfect.
 Choosing his words, he shifted upward and to his left, ever so
softly laying her head on the soft cushion, tilting his head even closer
to hers and asked her then, "we... should've brought drop cloths, no?"
 Her eyes twinkled amusement at his concern. "Oh, I'm sure brother
dear would appreciate our redecorating his bland-colored sheets... but,
there's still the inside..."
 And with that, Kodachi pulled the paint-leadened sheet around them
with one quick tug.

 "Yow! STOP!"
 Nabiki didn't need a watch to know that it was way too early in the
morning to be having this. She shoved the betoweled Akane into the
kitchen, approximately into a chair.
 "HEY! What is WRONG with you, Na-!"
 "SHUT UP!"
 Nabiki was shaking with clear anger, made obvious by the slow
frequency that sleep had instilled inertia into her body. She made one
step to her sister, grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her, now face
to face with Akane, hoping to be more effective that way. "Wake UP!"
 "Wh-what?" Akane was growing concerned. One side of the towel top
had gone lower than her chest, while the other hung bravely.
 "WAKE UP!" Nabiki seemed to lose intensity at that point. "Wake
UP! Wake up! Wake up... wake up..." Her head bowed, Nabiki badly
needed Akane's support.
 "But I'm already awake, big sister..." Akane's voice matched
Nabiki's energy level.
 The latter shook her head. "No. No, you're not." She tilted her
head slightly, meeting the Tendo heir's eyes with her own, upcast.
"You're having a dream."
 "A-A... dream."
 With a light push, Nabiki pulled herself to her full height. "Yes,
a dream. A dizzying, erotic, neurotic, dark, drug-addled dream." Barely
fumbling with her pocket, the brown-haired girl pulled out an aged spice
container.
 Not knowing why, Akane took the shaker. "The dreaded passion
spice," Nabiki intoned, then grinned lopsidedly. "Most deadly of
condiments."
 "Yeah, it says so here," Akane noted, pointing at the label.
 "Don't you get it yet?" Nabiki sounded faintly annoyed. "They way
Ranma seems perfect, says the things that makes you tingle, smells like
the way a comfortable bed would,... feels... like the only one you'll
ever... is because of this." She shook Akane's hand, making sure that
neither would accidentally whiff the fine grains.
 Nabiki had to dive for the container as Akane suddenly let go of
it. The latter fell back into the seat, clutching her shoulders tightly,
hugging herself wordlessly.
 "It's not over yet, Akane." Nabiki's voice seemed dark without
inflection. "No... no REAL damage done. We'll just tell Dad - "
 "Yes," Akane interrupted. She tilted her head up to look at her
older sister's face. "I understand, Nabiki." She smiled slightly.
"He... he didn't... he didn't say that he l..." She shook her head.
"I'm sure... with time... he'll learn to l-love..."
 "NO!" Nabiki's eyes flashed with a dread. "Akane! YOU'RE the one
who's drugged!"
 "I know that."
 Akane watched her sister flounder with the flat-out statement. She
settled to leave out most of her anger and let her confusion take
precedence.
 "You knew?"
 Akane smiled, somewhat goofily, then nodded. "I still know what
I'm doing, Nabiki. I just feel more of it, I guess."
 That knocked the fight right out of Nabiki, who slumped into the
seat opposite Akane's. "So, you still want to get married to that...
that lout? That insensitive jerk?"
 "Yeah," the younger said, "we still have some... unfinished
business."

 He dizzily woke to the smell of freshly-cooked food.
 "Good morning, P-chan!"
 That sure woke him up: the conflicting signals of Akane and
cooking flashed to completely stifle his endomorphine intake, and an
urgent ringing in his ears better than any alarm clock.
 Unfortunately, his body did nothing of the sort to aid him in
escaping utter and certain gastric malcontent. Moreover, the strong
smell of hot things-pretending-to-be-cooking drew even nearer. The only
thing he could do was roll in the sheets, which were swimming up and
around him in life that he himself gave it.
 "Oh... playing hide and seek, are we?" The hands started holding
the ends of the sheet, stopping the flowing that seemed to be causing him
seasickness, anyway.
 "Okay," Ukyo almost chirped, "you're it." She reached her arms in,
a slight distance from where the little pig was hunched, wide-eyed.
 Ryoga looked at her quizzically. With an effort, he leapt into her
waiting grasp.
 "Good boy," Ukyo smiled, rubbing him on top of the head. "You
hungry? Of course you are..." She gingerly cupped the smaller form in
her two hands and forearms, and gently descended.

 Nabiki met Kasumi at the base of the stairs.
 "How are they?" the younger asked.
 "They're sleeping fine," Kasumi noticed, absently wiping at the hem
of her skirt, catching it at the last step down. "In different rooms,
that is."
 "I wouldn't have guessed. Want a snack?"
 Kasumi sighed. "I really don't know, Nabiki. I really should be
sleeping, too..."
 "Don't worry, sis. I already cooked us up something." With that,
Nabiki pulled her through into the kitchen.
 "Cream of mushroom soup?" Kasumi could tell from the distinct
smell that wafted over from the pot.
 "It's instant," Nabiki lied, reaching for two bowls, "a little
something to pass us into breakfast."
 Despite her (small, non-violent) protestations, Kasumi sat, waiting
to be served. Nabiki soon returned, distributing the meal. The middle
Tendo waited until the elder sibling had had a taste.
 "It's kind of different without eggs... but it's still good,
Nabiki."
 Nabiki hoped that her calculations had been right, and nodded. She
absently pushed her own bowl forward, and leaned on her forearms.
"Kasumi..."
 "... hmm?" She took another mushroom piece, and nibbled on it.
 "Since... since Akane's getting married, do you think you'd want to
go to college with me?"
 Kasumi put down the near-empty bowl, and paused to think. "... I'm
sure that Akane would still need some training in some of the household
chores."
 Nabiki nodded slightly. "That's why we go together. I figure a
year or so should be enough, ne?"
 Kasumi almost acceded the point. Her sister had a familiar gleam
in her eye. When had she seen it before? "I'm not sure. Do we have the
money for it? And I still haven't gone to high school." She paused to
sip some water.
 "Of course, we have money. And you could just go to a prep school
for a year, then take the exams." Nabiki smiled. "And I don't think you
should worry about your age."
 "Oh..." Kasumi put a hand to her head. "Nabiki, I think I'm
more... sleepy... than I thought..." Too late, she realized that
Nabiki's gleam was one of waiting, the one she had on Mother's funeral,
when she was playing shogi with Father. One for distraction.
 Nabiki took the bowls, and glanced back at her unconscious sister.
The changes have come full circle, sister. It's time for you to
rediscover yourself.
 It'll be good for you.

 "It's good?"
 Ryoga was beginning to wonder for Ukyo's sanity. Yesterday, she
was all daggers and heat. Today, as the sun kissed the morning awake,
she was a little too chipper, and way, way too nice.
 Like you've always wanted her to be, something in the middle of his
head said. He wondered obliquely who it meant when it said "her".
 "C'mon, P-chan... say 'aaaahhh...'" Ukyo fed him the last piece of
the fifth okonomiyaki. "That's a good boy..." She took the plates and
took them to the sink in the kitchen extension of the room.
 Ukyo was whistling a nameless tune over the hum of warm water,
ceramic plates and soapwater. She noticed that P-chan was wandering
aimlessly, looking for a way to get to the sink.
 "Not too fast, you." She picked up the midget porker, and headed
back to the bed. "It's too early to get lost again."
 As they crossed the floor to the bed, Ryoga noticed the clothes he
had left yesterday evening, draped over the couch, and squirmed noisily
in that direction.
 Ukyo didn't need to look over her shoulder. "I know, I know..."
Her voice was soft, and unmistakably different.
 Ryoga felt himself settled onto the cushions, and looked at Ukyo
seat herself on the other side of the foot of the bed. She sat, not
looking at him, rather, looking at the floor in front of him, hands to
her sides, not quite sure what to do with them.
 Ryoga noticed, for the first time, the bow-tie. It was a yellow
ribbon, and looked a little time-worn. Had Ukyo been wearing one before?
He was not sure, but it seemed to be a new fashion statement. It
accentuated her long, graceful neck.
 [And it looked like it was ripped at one end, as though it was
looking for a soulmate.]
 "Ryoga..." Ukyo began, "can we... can you be... my pet?"

 "Dinner, my pet?"
 He cringed at that. Nodoka only called him that when she wanted
him to do EXACTLY as she wanted him to do. The lure of a home-cooked
meal seemed too tempting to pass up at any point, but...
 "I made your favorite..." she crooned.
 What WAS the reason why he didn't just give in to the lady's
demands, anyway? No, the other parts of his mind reacted, the parts he
immediately labeled as "devious and cunning". One must always keep
appearances.
 "Nodoka," he said, suddenly serious.
 He liked the way that Nodoka stiffened under that calm, unaffected
exterior. She cared enough to do that. Hell, she cared enough to get
her own house, to get away from her parent's tyrannical clutches, to be
an independent, modern woman.
 No, he just liked the way it made her breasts jut out, and the
supple symmetry of her spine wreaked sheer havoc on his hormones.
 "Nodoka," he repeated, "I saw her today."
 Exquisite, delectable silence.
 "So... why are you here now?"
 Touché. "I-I-" Feigning nervousness never worked for him - he was
just worried that she was going to slice off his ears later. "-I...
wanted... to tell you... myself..." He trailed off, trying to see her
from periphery, because he couldn't look her in any way resembling the
straight-forward manner.
 She herself was obliquely turned away. "How about the daikon?"
 "Yes, the squid. That, too." Taking away the last strands of
self-control he could muster, he stole into the adjoining dining room,
admiring the romantic design of the two-seated table only for a moment,
snatching three rings decoratively positioned in the appetizer plate.
 He stepped back into sight, leaning on the doorway, loudly
crunching on the first of the trio of edible circles. "Mmm... the
squid's getting cold..."
 "It can wait..." she whispered slightly, cringing with the
tormenting dental exercise.
 "It could wait," he corrected, attacking the second ring with twice
the fury. "'til the ring."
 With that, the third went down the gullet. Then he did the face.
 It looked like he was choking, with his eyes of different sizes.
Slowly, stuck his tongue out -
 A gold band was on the end of it.
 "I've eaten your rings," Genma intoned, "will you wear mine?"