*Disclaimer: I don't own the series Gilmore Girls or the characters. All I
own is my imagination and the plot.
*A/N: Hey!!! As most of you know, I just finished 'Wanna bet' and that means that I'll be focusing all my creativity on another story from now on. I chose thise one, cause 1. I wanted to see what kind of reaction I would get, 2. to see what I could do with this story and 3. to see if I can write another fic that's a little darker than my usual stories. *O and if you don't like the fact that Rory has an abusive boyfriend in this story, then please don't read it!* So, please review and..........react! Thanks for your patience and thanks for all the people who reviewed the first chapter. Some questions will be answered in this chapter. (And if you haven't yet, please read and review my new story 'I guess, you say'. I'd really like your opinion. It's R/J and fluff!)
*~*~*:-)*~*~*Bye, smile :-)
After what seemed like and eternity, Rory pulled away from Jess. Not because she wanted to, cause she could stay in Jess' embrace forever, but because she felt like she had to. She just barged into his carefree life and threw all her problems at him. And lucky for her, he was the kind of person who caught her problems and stopped her from falling. He had always been that kind of person, even though you couldn't tell unless you knew him. Being in Jess' arms again felt liberating and safe and his touch was as gentle as she remembered, which you wouldn't expect if you looked at him. Dark intriguing eyes, intimidating figure with muscles in the right places, a roughly shaped face with sharp and eye-catching features and dark, almost black hair that looked restless, just like the person it belonged to.
The black of her eyes almost stood out horrifying against her light skin tone. Jess hid his clenched fists in the pockets of his jeans as he looked at the obvious frightened yet relieved brunette.
J: ''So, are you hungry ?''
A smile protruded on her beautifully colored ivory face, slowly, as if a drawer was sketching it.
R: ''I'm hungry, yes.''
J: ''Just hungry ?''
R: ''Okay, I'm starved.''
As her smile got more sure and authentic, so did Jess'. He was glad that he had been able to lighten the mood at least a little. He took a step towards her and raised his arm to reach for the phone, that was placed right behind her, to Rory's unfortunate. She immediately panicked and crashed against the dresser behind her. Jess, who was unaware of how his simple action could scare Rory, realized what he had done wrong and backed away from her. He looked at Rory, his anger for Bryan hidden by the apologetic look in his eyes.
J: ''Sorry, I was just reaching for the phone.''
R: ''I..........I................''
Because of her lack of words, she just wrapped her arms around her and moved aside so Jess could reach the phone. She avoided his eyes as he picked up the phone.
R: ''Is it okay if I wander around ?''
J: ''Just don't get lost.''
Rory weakly smiled and started to leave the room, leaving Jess with a small smile as he dialed a number. When he had ordered the pizza, he hung up the phone and went to look for Rory. He ended up finding her in his room, sitting cross-legged in front of one of his bookcases with a book in her lap. Jess leaned against the doorframe and watched her as she wiped her hair away from her face and flew across the pages with those aesthetic eyes of her. Finally he went back to the living room, deciding that he would leave her there until the pizza arrived. It was nice having her around again.
*~*~*
When the pizza arrived, Jess took it into the kitchen. He turned around to get Rory, but she was already standing behind him. He noticed that she had put on her cardigan again. It had nothing to do with him, but she was just not comfortable after everything that had happened between her and Bryan. Besides she never was the type of girl to walk around the house, wearing as less clothes as possible.
R: ''I heard the doorbell.''
J: ''Already figured something like that. So, shall we take this into the living room ?''
Rory nodded and lifted the pizza of off the table. Rory got a couple of plates and followed him. They sat down on the couch, placing the pizza box between them. They sat in silence for a while, eating their pizza until Jess repeated the question that he had asked earlier.
J: ''Rory................''
He had to ask. He just couldn't believe that Rory was so weak and let this happen to her. He wanted to hear her explanation again, seeing if he had missed something in her earlier one.
R: ''Yeah ?''
She faced him, knowing that he probably wanted to know everything.
J: ''Why didn't you tell anyone ?''
R: ''It was hard to talk about it.''
Jess wasn't going to drop it this easy, especially when he wasn't satisfied with her answer. It was too easy. The least Rory could do was come up with a better answer.
J: ''I don't believe you.''
Rory lowered her eyes.
J: ''You could have told your mom, I'm sure she would have understood.''
R: ''She probably would have.''
J: ''Then why didn't you tell her ?''
R: ''I was ashamed..........I guess.''
She quickly looked up, only to find Jess' eyes looking at her, waiting for answers.
R: ''You know how strong my mom is and you don't even have to know my grandma to know what a strong and dependent woman she is............ I was ashamed to tell them. I mean I let him hit me and I acted like a weak, little girl. I just never expected myself to handle the situation the way I did.''
J: ''You're not weak.''
R: ''Yes I am.''
J: ''No you're not.''
R: ''Then why didn't I stop him when he hit me ? Or why didn't I call anyone ? Why didn't I run ?''
J: ''You did run. You're here now.''
R: ''Yeah, but it took me too long. I could have done it much sooner. You were right.''
J: ''You were scared Rory.''
R: ''Helpless you mean.''
Jess didn't say anything for a while. He had a feeling that he was just going to make it worse and he didn't want to have an argument with Rory about something so understandable. Something that took her a lot of courage to do, so she wasn't weak. Scared ? Yes. But weak ? No.
J: ''Did.........did Bryan ever hurt you in a different way ?''
His voice was just above a susurration, not wanting to suggest the obvious meaning that lay hidden in his question.
Rory looked up and met his eyes, not sure what he meant.
R: ''What do you mean ?''
J: ''Did Bryan ever rape you ?''
Rory shifted her gaze from Jess to the wall behind him. She wasn't really shocked by the question itself, but by the fact that the question was actually meant for her. She never pictured herself answering a question like that. After all, she wasn't the girl that got abused. It was just something that happened on TV, but right now the reality of the matter was so close that it almost made her scream.
J: ''Rory ?''
Finally she shook her head and Jess let out a relieved breath. Rory pulled her knees up to her chest and started to pull at the sleeves of her cardigan. Pulling it to see how much it would stretch, just like she was wondering how long she could stretch this silence between her and Jess. Suddenly she let go of her cardigan and wrapped her arms around her knees, breaking the silence with her shaky and unsure voice.
R: ''He did try............., but every time he would, I would start to scream.''
She bit her lips and looked at one of the bruises on her lower arm. Jess followed her gaze and saw how she pulled at the sleeves of her cardigan so that it would cover her entire arm.
R: ''When I would scream, he would hit me. But after a while he stopped trying and he would start to come home late. He was probably with one of his other girlfriends.''
Rory knew that he voice sounded bitter when she said that last sentence. It hurt that Bryan just kept her around to hurt and patronize.
J: ''Why didn't you leave sooner, if he was gone at night ?''
He was talking to her in a soft voice, as if he was talking to a little girl. And the funny part was that she didn't blame him. She felt like a little girl after all.
R: ''He would call to check up on me and I............I............''
She took a deep breath, calming her body down with the cool air.
R: ''And I was afraid.''
There she had admitted it. She was afraid and did what she thought was right at the moment.
J: ''What made you leave tonight ?''
Rory shrugged.
R: ''I couldn't take it anymore.''
J: ''Why me ?''
Rory smiled as she wondered why he even bothered to ask her when he already knew the answer. She looked up at him and met his eyes. And for a moment she saw Jess like he was when he was 17. She remembered why she fell in love with him and wished that she could go back to that period in her life. If she would be able to do that, she would do a lot of things differently. Avoid all the fights she had with Jess over nothing for one thing. They weren't worth it. All the time they spend apart they could have been enjoying in each other's company.
R: ''Cause...............I knew I could trust you.''
Jess nodded, he knew that she wasn't lying to him. She did trust him. No matter what he did, she always trusted him. Even when he did something, she was always there to defend him and his actions, without asking him if it was really his fault or not. He asked her about it once.
*~*~*Flashback*~*~*
J: ''Why did you do that ?''
R: ''Do what ?''
J: ''Defend me like that, when obviously I was the one who caused it.''
R: ''It doesn't matter. I'm your girlfriend and I've got your back.''
*~*~*End of Flashback*~*~*
Jess smiled at the memory. After that they had kissed and laughed about the way Rory said, I've got your back.''
J: ''Did you tell anyone else ?''
Rory immediately dropped her gaze from Jess to her hands and started to trace little circles on her knee. She nodded.
R: ''Dean.''
For some reason Jess still had the urge to slam his fist into something every time he heard Dean's name. He never got along with the tall and possessive guy. But putting his feelings aside, he kept listening to the small and fragile girl that was sitting across from him. He had found that it took a lot to break her and he hated Bryan for having done just that.
R: ''I called Dean and told him about Bryan and......you know. Dean, of course, got mad and wanted to beat Bryan up, but I wouldn't let him, cause I knew that he would end up getting hurt..........as well as I would. I haven't talked to Dean since then.''
J: ''You know, for once I agree with bag boy. Hell, I would even team up with him to beat the crap out of Bryan.''
That comment made Rory smile. Jess cracked a smile himself when he saw the cute smile that could make you do anything if she did it at the right moment. Rory yawned and that was when Jess noticed how tired she looked.
R: ''I haven't been sleeping well.''
Jess nodded and got up from the couch.
J: ''I'll get you something to sleep in.''
He turned around and wanted to head for his bedroom, but Rory's voice stopped him dead in his tracks.
R: ''Jess, I know this is going to sound weird, but do you have something with long sleeves ?''
Jess nodded and went to his bedroom. Minutes later he came back and handed her one of his oversized sweat pants and an old long sleeved shirt. He showed her where the bathroom was and with a kind smile she disappeared into it.
Once she was in the bathroom, she started to take off her clothes. Slowly, so that the fabric of the clothes wouldn't brush against her skin too much. Soon she found herself staring at herself in her mirror. Because she was naked, she could see the damage that Bryan had done to her body. She knew that she had bruises all over her body, but seeing them like this made her feel horrible. She hated the way she looked. Tears started to from in her eyes, blurring her vision of herself in the mirror. Before she could break down entirely, she managed to put on the clothes that Jess had given her. After that she leaned against the wall that was the farthest away from the mirror and slid down on the floor. Her body started to shake as tears started to run down her cheeks even faster. Why did she let Bryan hit her ? Why didn't she stop him ? Her cries must have gotten louder, cause Jess knocked on the door.
J: ''Rory ? Rory, are you okay ?''
His voice sounded worried and Rory felt guilty. She brought Jess into this mess and made him worry about her when he shouldn't be.
R: ''I'm fine.''
She didn't really know how she managed to actually get the words out of her mouth, but it didn't matter. Jess came in anyway.
Jess found Rory, sitting on the floor of the bathroom, crying. Something inside him broke and he started to walk over to her.
R: ''Don't come near me...............please.''
Jess stopped and sat down on the other end of the bathroom so he could watch her. Every time he saw her body shake or he saw a tear slide down her cheek, his urge to beat something up become worse. But he remained calm, waiting patiently until she cried herself to sleep. When she did, he carefully lifted her from the ground and carried her to his room. He lay her down on his bed, careful not to wake her up. But when he let go of her, her eyelashes fluttered and slowly her eyes opened.
R: ''Jess............?''
J: ''Yes ?''
R: ''Thank you.''
Jess smiled as he tucked her in, knowing that she had already went back to sleep. He wiped her hair away from her forehead and placed a soft kiss on it, promising that things would get better.
*A/N: Hey!!! As most of you know, I just finished 'Wanna bet' and that means that I'll be focusing all my creativity on another story from now on. I chose thise one, cause 1. I wanted to see what kind of reaction I would get, 2. to see what I could do with this story and 3. to see if I can write another fic that's a little darker than my usual stories. *O and if you don't like the fact that Rory has an abusive boyfriend in this story, then please don't read it!* So, please review and..........react! Thanks for your patience and thanks for all the people who reviewed the first chapter. Some questions will be answered in this chapter. (And if you haven't yet, please read and review my new story 'I guess, you say'. I'd really like your opinion. It's R/J and fluff!)
*~*~*:-)*~*~*Bye, smile :-)
After what seemed like and eternity, Rory pulled away from Jess. Not because she wanted to, cause she could stay in Jess' embrace forever, but because she felt like she had to. She just barged into his carefree life and threw all her problems at him. And lucky for her, he was the kind of person who caught her problems and stopped her from falling. He had always been that kind of person, even though you couldn't tell unless you knew him. Being in Jess' arms again felt liberating and safe and his touch was as gentle as she remembered, which you wouldn't expect if you looked at him. Dark intriguing eyes, intimidating figure with muscles in the right places, a roughly shaped face with sharp and eye-catching features and dark, almost black hair that looked restless, just like the person it belonged to.
The black of her eyes almost stood out horrifying against her light skin tone. Jess hid his clenched fists in the pockets of his jeans as he looked at the obvious frightened yet relieved brunette.
J: ''So, are you hungry ?''
A smile protruded on her beautifully colored ivory face, slowly, as if a drawer was sketching it.
R: ''I'm hungry, yes.''
J: ''Just hungry ?''
R: ''Okay, I'm starved.''
As her smile got more sure and authentic, so did Jess'. He was glad that he had been able to lighten the mood at least a little. He took a step towards her and raised his arm to reach for the phone, that was placed right behind her, to Rory's unfortunate. She immediately panicked and crashed against the dresser behind her. Jess, who was unaware of how his simple action could scare Rory, realized what he had done wrong and backed away from her. He looked at Rory, his anger for Bryan hidden by the apologetic look in his eyes.
J: ''Sorry, I was just reaching for the phone.''
R: ''I..........I................''
Because of her lack of words, she just wrapped her arms around her and moved aside so Jess could reach the phone. She avoided his eyes as he picked up the phone.
R: ''Is it okay if I wander around ?''
J: ''Just don't get lost.''
Rory weakly smiled and started to leave the room, leaving Jess with a small smile as he dialed a number. When he had ordered the pizza, he hung up the phone and went to look for Rory. He ended up finding her in his room, sitting cross-legged in front of one of his bookcases with a book in her lap. Jess leaned against the doorframe and watched her as she wiped her hair away from her face and flew across the pages with those aesthetic eyes of her. Finally he went back to the living room, deciding that he would leave her there until the pizza arrived. It was nice having her around again.
*~*~*
When the pizza arrived, Jess took it into the kitchen. He turned around to get Rory, but she was already standing behind him. He noticed that she had put on her cardigan again. It had nothing to do with him, but she was just not comfortable after everything that had happened between her and Bryan. Besides she never was the type of girl to walk around the house, wearing as less clothes as possible.
R: ''I heard the doorbell.''
J: ''Already figured something like that. So, shall we take this into the living room ?''
Rory nodded and lifted the pizza of off the table. Rory got a couple of plates and followed him. They sat down on the couch, placing the pizza box between them. They sat in silence for a while, eating their pizza until Jess repeated the question that he had asked earlier.
J: ''Rory................''
He had to ask. He just couldn't believe that Rory was so weak and let this happen to her. He wanted to hear her explanation again, seeing if he had missed something in her earlier one.
R: ''Yeah ?''
She faced him, knowing that he probably wanted to know everything.
J: ''Why didn't you tell anyone ?''
R: ''It was hard to talk about it.''
Jess wasn't going to drop it this easy, especially when he wasn't satisfied with her answer. It was too easy. The least Rory could do was come up with a better answer.
J: ''I don't believe you.''
Rory lowered her eyes.
J: ''You could have told your mom, I'm sure she would have understood.''
R: ''She probably would have.''
J: ''Then why didn't you tell her ?''
R: ''I was ashamed..........I guess.''
She quickly looked up, only to find Jess' eyes looking at her, waiting for answers.
R: ''You know how strong my mom is and you don't even have to know my grandma to know what a strong and dependent woman she is............ I was ashamed to tell them. I mean I let him hit me and I acted like a weak, little girl. I just never expected myself to handle the situation the way I did.''
J: ''You're not weak.''
R: ''Yes I am.''
J: ''No you're not.''
R: ''Then why didn't I stop him when he hit me ? Or why didn't I call anyone ? Why didn't I run ?''
J: ''You did run. You're here now.''
R: ''Yeah, but it took me too long. I could have done it much sooner. You were right.''
J: ''You were scared Rory.''
R: ''Helpless you mean.''
Jess didn't say anything for a while. He had a feeling that he was just going to make it worse and he didn't want to have an argument with Rory about something so understandable. Something that took her a lot of courage to do, so she wasn't weak. Scared ? Yes. But weak ? No.
J: ''Did.........did Bryan ever hurt you in a different way ?''
His voice was just above a susurration, not wanting to suggest the obvious meaning that lay hidden in his question.
Rory looked up and met his eyes, not sure what he meant.
R: ''What do you mean ?''
J: ''Did Bryan ever rape you ?''
Rory shifted her gaze from Jess to the wall behind him. She wasn't really shocked by the question itself, but by the fact that the question was actually meant for her. She never pictured herself answering a question like that. After all, she wasn't the girl that got abused. It was just something that happened on TV, but right now the reality of the matter was so close that it almost made her scream.
J: ''Rory ?''
Finally she shook her head and Jess let out a relieved breath. Rory pulled her knees up to her chest and started to pull at the sleeves of her cardigan. Pulling it to see how much it would stretch, just like she was wondering how long she could stretch this silence between her and Jess. Suddenly she let go of her cardigan and wrapped her arms around her knees, breaking the silence with her shaky and unsure voice.
R: ''He did try............., but every time he would, I would start to scream.''
She bit her lips and looked at one of the bruises on her lower arm. Jess followed her gaze and saw how she pulled at the sleeves of her cardigan so that it would cover her entire arm.
R: ''When I would scream, he would hit me. But after a while he stopped trying and he would start to come home late. He was probably with one of his other girlfriends.''
Rory knew that he voice sounded bitter when she said that last sentence. It hurt that Bryan just kept her around to hurt and patronize.
J: ''Why didn't you leave sooner, if he was gone at night ?''
He was talking to her in a soft voice, as if he was talking to a little girl. And the funny part was that she didn't blame him. She felt like a little girl after all.
R: ''He would call to check up on me and I............I............''
She took a deep breath, calming her body down with the cool air.
R: ''And I was afraid.''
There she had admitted it. She was afraid and did what she thought was right at the moment.
J: ''What made you leave tonight ?''
Rory shrugged.
R: ''I couldn't take it anymore.''
J: ''Why me ?''
Rory smiled as she wondered why he even bothered to ask her when he already knew the answer. She looked up at him and met his eyes. And for a moment she saw Jess like he was when he was 17. She remembered why she fell in love with him and wished that she could go back to that period in her life. If she would be able to do that, she would do a lot of things differently. Avoid all the fights she had with Jess over nothing for one thing. They weren't worth it. All the time they spend apart they could have been enjoying in each other's company.
R: ''Cause...............I knew I could trust you.''
Jess nodded, he knew that she wasn't lying to him. She did trust him. No matter what he did, she always trusted him. Even when he did something, she was always there to defend him and his actions, without asking him if it was really his fault or not. He asked her about it once.
*~*~*Flashback*~*~*
J: ''Why did you do that ?''
R: ''Do what ?''
J: ''Defend me like that, when obviously I was the one who caused it.''
R: ''It doesn't matter. I'm your girlfriend and I've got your back.''
*~*~*End of Flashback*~*~*
Jess smiled at the memory. After that they had kissed and laughed about the way Rory said, I've got your back.''
J: ''Did you tell anyone else ?''
Rory immediately dropped her gaze from Jess to her hands and started to trace little circles on her knee. She nodded.
R: ''Dean.''
For some reason Jess still had the urge to slam his fist into something every time he heard Dean's name. He never got along with the tall and possessive guy. But putting his feelings aside, he kept listening to the small and fragile girl that was sitting across from him. He had found that it took a lot to break her and he hated Bryan for having done just that.
R: ''I called Dean and told him about Bryan and......you know. Dean, of course, got mad and wanted to beat Bryan up, but I wouldn't let him, cause I knew that he would end up getting hurt..........as well as I would. I haven't talked to Dean since then.''
J: ''You know, for once I agree with bag boy. Hell, I would even team up with him to beat the crap out of Bryan.''
That comment made Rory smile. Jess cracked a smile himself when he saw the cute smile that could make you do anything if she did it at the right moment. Rory yawned and that was when Jess noticed how tired she looked.
R: ''I haven't been sleeping well.''
Jess nodded and got up from the couch.
J: ''I'll get you something to sleep in.''
He turned around and wanted to head for his bedroom, but Rory's voice stopped him dead in his tracks.
R: ''Jess, I know this is going to sound weird, but do you have something with long sleeves ?''
Jess nodded and went to his bedroom. Minutes later he came back and handed her one of his oversized sweat pants and an old long sleeved shirt. He showed her where the bathroom was and with a kind smile she disappeared into it.
Once she was in the bathroom, she started to take off her clothes. Slowly, so that the fabric of the clothes wouldn't brush against her skin too much. Soon she found herself staring at herself in her mirror. Because she was naked, she could see the damage that Bryan had done to her body. She knew that she had bruises all over her body, but seeing them like this made her feel horrible. She hated the way she looked. Tears started to from in her eyes, blurring her vision of herself in the mirror. Before she could break down entirely, she managed to put on the clothes that Jess had given her. After that she leaned against the wall that was the farthest away from the mirror and slid down on the floor. Her body started to shake as tears started to run down her cheeks even faster. Why did she let Bryan hit her ? Why didn't she stop him ? Her cries must have gotten louder, cause Jess knocked on the door.
J: ''Rory ? Rory, are you okay ?''
His voice sounded worried and Rory felt guilty. She brought Jess into this mess and made him worry about her when he shouldn't be.
R: ''I'm fine.''
She didn't really know how she managed to actually get the words out of her mouth, but it didn't matter. Jess came in anyway.
Jess found Rory, sitting on the floor of the bathroom, crying. Something inside him broke and he started to walk over to her.
R: ''Don't come near me...............please.''
Jess stopped and sat down on the other end of the bathroom so he could watch her. Every time he saw her body shake or he saw a tear slide down her cheek, his urge to beat something up become worse. But he remained calm, waiting patiently until she cried herself to sleep. When she did, he carefully lifted her from the ground and carried her to his room. He lay her down on his bed, careful not to wake her up. But when he let go of her, her eyelashes fluttered and slowly her eyes opened.
R: ''Jess............?''
J: ''Yes ?''
R: ''Thank you.''
Jess smiled as he tucked her in, knowing that she had already went back to sleep. He wiped her hair away from her forehead and placed a soft kiss on it, promising that things would get better.
