Chapter Three- Hogwarts: Home to witchcraft and Misery
James gazed ineptly across the tiny compartment they had decided to share. They hadn't said a word since she'd stopped crying and now Lily was asleep with her head against the hard window. He wanted so badly to conjure up a pillow, he was sure her lovely neck was killing her, but knew that she would not appreciate his coddling. After all, as she had so adeptly reminded him when they were boarding, he still had Delia to deal with. What would he say when she found them? (He was sure she was looking, he could hear the compartments slamming open and close.) Lily was sure to wake up when she heard the frosty tone. How would he introduce her? He couldn't very well say his girlfriend, though he was starting to think it had a nice ring to it, and friend was out of the question. Lily Evans was not just a friend, not in his mind, the kisses they'd shared proved that. There was a spark between them and if she were introduced as only a friend he was sure it would another squandered emotion for both of them.
"James darling where have you . . ."
The blonde stopped short as she saw Lily curled up by the window. The two black dots had narrowed in on the unsuspecting victim. James was thankfully spared introductions as Delia walked right up and sneered.
"And who would this be?"
Lily's emerald eyes flew open in alarm. The sleep was gone and James could see the way her hand hovered over her robes warily. She was prepared for Delia to attack. From the way her eyes darkened he could say there was a good bet she would. The one thing he didn't understand was the way they stood there sizing each other up. There seemed to be more in their glares then when two guys got ready to brawl.
"Lillian Evans of House Gryffindor."
Delia whirled back to James, her sneer disappearing. His face was expressionless but Lily could see the defiance in the way he crossed his arms over his chest.
"James darling you don't have to sit with the Mudblood trash" she purred, "Malfoy and I were wondering where you had gone missing. I see now that little Miss Pathetic here had you locked away. My poor beloved, stuck here under some curse. Come along."
James didn't move, his eyes focusing on some spot around her neck. 'Ah yes, her and little Lucius Malfoy, how quaint. Well now I don't feel the least bit guilty about dumping her like yesterday's trash' he thought with an amused smile. Delia smiled back, never understanding in the least bit why he was grinning so cheerfully. He would have to do something about that mouth of hers. No one could call Lillian a Mudblood, least of all that blonde snob. He knew for a fact that there was a little muggle in her blood as well!
"Delia darling, I would like to introduce you properly. Lillian sweetheart rise. I would like you to meet yesteryears trash. Delia I would like you to meet my charming new girlfriend, Lillian Evans. There, now you can scamper off to Master Malfoy, you little Slytherin trollop. And invite him, at his nearest convenience, to kiss my arse!"
Delia gaped at him as he slid an arm around Lily's waist. It felt good to say the words, but as it was over he worried about the way Lily had taken it. He had messed up so many times, hopefully she didn't think he was using her to get even. He had been going to ask before, but she just wouldn't talk to him, and he doubted she would have taken it the right way then either. Luckily he didn't have to wait long after Delia stormed out furiously before Lily wrapped her slender arms around his neck and gave him the most mind-numbing kiss of all.
Lily and James waved cheerfully at the giant before they climbed into one of the carriages that would be taking them to the castle. Even when Lily had been going out with Frank Longbottom they had both shared different carriages. 'Maybe Frank just wasn't used to having a real girlfriend' she thought with a smile. He had been sweet but their feelings had always been lukewarm and it hadn't been worth fighting Alice over him. Now as she blushed furiously in the dark, Lily realized why it had happened. She had been primed by someone in the stars to be with James Potter.
"What are you giggling about my lovely?"
James pulled her closer into his sleepy embrace making sure to inhale as much of her as possible. The girl was intoxicating and for once he wasn't hell bent on screwing her before he found out her last name. It was his turn to chuckle, yes he wasn't intent on messing up this relationship. If he played his cards correctly he might actually get something worthwhile out of this. With Delia it had been all about getting shagged, but with Lily Evans . . .
"It's something else entirely."
It was Lily's turn to be confused. She had thought James had fallen asleep that way. 'No, his eyes are still open' she thought. But then, he hadn't said anything, what was he talking about?
"James? What are you talking about?"
He bent to place a kiss on her forehead before climbing out of the cart. They had arrived at the main gate without a scratch on them. He half expected for Voldemort to jump out of the shadows and slaughter them all. 'She's such a strong girl. Not once has she mentioned her family since that time in Blorish & Blotts.' He had barely been allowed to help her down before he was pegged in the head with a toy snitch. A grin lite up his face.
"Oy! My dear old Sirius Black. Still alive? I'd have thought your mother'd chopped you to pieces by now. And Remus as well. Bet the old wench didn't like that!"
Sirius barked with laughter but Remus seemed to have spaced out. James had known him to do that several times but when Sirius joined in with the staring fest he became startled. His best-friend wasn't one to go braindead. 'Maybe Old Lady Black did get the best of them' he thought suddenly. After a few seconds he walked beside them and inclined his neck to see exactly what had caught their eye. 'Oh God' he thought mortified. He could almost hear the words floating in her head, and as he looked back on that day years later, he was almost sure he had. 'What am I doing? I don't belong here, maybe I should just go straight up to Gryffindor tower and wait until he's alone. Or maybe I shouldn't wait at all. Look at the way his friends are staring at me in horror like I'm some filthy little mudblood who wouldn't be high enough to shine their boots. Oh come on Lily, pull it together, just walk away!' She had just about managed it as well before he slipped an arm around her waste.
"I'm sorry I just got caught up" he whispered in her ear.
She couldn't help acting so pathetic sometimes. Time was what she needed. Time to rest, to grieve, to get her head straight, to remember that life for her would go on. Everything was going in a blur and Lily wasn't quite sure what was happening. She just remembered introducing herself, shaking hands, and then going suddenly limp. Her eyes wouldn't focus, she could barely draw in her next breath. She watched, from a distance, as her body collapsed into James' loose hold. Watched as the boy Remus ran for Dumbledore. Watched James pick her up and run into the castle himself. Then came the many whispers, whispers she knew she would dread listening to the next day.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A week later the fog began to release her and Lily was able to open her eyes. The infirmary was quiet, not even Madam Pomfrey seemed to be there. Inch by inch she raised herself until she could see more than the ceiling. Sleeping in the bed beside her was James. 'Did he get hurt somehow?' she wondered. The soft snoring made her think not. 'It's got to be almost lunch time, has he skipped classes all day?'
"What are you doing out of bed missy?"
Lily flinched, she'd been caught. Two bare arms grabbed her from behind and landed her straight on her back in the makeshift bed. Hovering over her she could see the charming grin that belonged to James. He didn't seem at all angry, more worried than anything.
"You've been gone for a week. I was starting to think I drove you to mental suicide."
Lily giggled as he laid a kiss on her mouth. There were at least two dozen roses in a vase beside her bed, which she briefly remembered being changed after the originals dried out. 'What's happened to me?' she thought, her good mood wilting.
"Where's Professor Dumbledore? I think I need to see him."
James didn't appear to be the least bit surprised at her request. Dumbledore had told him as much. Lily had pushed the pain and memory of her dead mother to the back of her mind, by not dealing with them she had made herself a thousand times worse. Now she had managed to let the grief make her sick. 'If she continues on in this manner she may end up dying herself.' James had never thought of grief this way and her cheerful mood now frightened him. He hadn't wanted to bring it up but she was still acting like her parents murders had never happened.
"James I'm fine, really. I'm just dying to get out of this bed. I can't let myself fall so behind in school work. Especially if I'm to . . . Just go fetch Dumbledore for me will you?"
The carefree tone turned to anger in the matter of a lightning strike. Dumbledore couldn't make her miss more school. She needed to make sure that she was strong enough when the time came to kill her sister and destroy Voldemort once and for all before he destroyed her. She didn't have time to sit around the infirmary and dawdle.
"Just calm down lovely. Take deep breaths and I'll go get the Headmaster for you."
Once he was gone and she was in the clear Lily began summoning books from all over the place.
"Accio Grimore, Accio spellbooks!"
By the time Dumbledore and James came racing in she had been hilighting and writing notes for almost ten minutes. It wasn't really a lot of time but Lily worked at a fast pace, she was swish-and-flicking everywhere. Things from mirrors to animals to patronus' were floating around the room. Dumbledore began his search for Madam Pomfrey and as he had suspected he found her frozen under the gigantic pinapple.
"Accio wand!" he shouted.
He caught her wand just in time. Lily had been about to try and go invisible. The damage she could have inflicted then would have been enormous. Beside him Dumbledore saw a terrified James Potter. Hagrid had told him of their little bond, he wasn't sure that if he stayed this boy would be unaffected.
"James, Lily is going to need someone when she comes out of this. She has no family, and I think therefore you should leave, lest you be detterred from having further contact."
James thought of what he said. Was it really smart to go against him? 'He might be right.'
"Professor, I think she needs me now more than ever. Shouldn't you ask me to stay?"
A/N: Lily's obviously having a breakdown right about now and she's gone haywire. But what will happen when she gets better . . . is she really going to be the same?
James gazed ineptly across the tiny compartment they had decided to share. They hadn't said a word since she'd stopped crying and now Lily was asleep with her head against the hard window. He wanted so badly to conjure up a pillow, he was sure her lovely neck was killing her, but knew that she would not appreciate his coddling. After all, as she had so adeptly reminded him when they were boarding, he still had Delia to deal with. What would he say when she found them? (He was sure she was looking, he could hear the compartments slamming open and close.) Lily was sure to wake up when she heard the frosty tone. How would he introduce her? He couldn't very well say his girlfriend, though he was starting to think it had a nice ring to it, and friend was out of the question. Lily Evans was not just a friend, not in his mind, the kisses they'd shared proved that. There was a spark between them and if she were introduced as only a friend he was sure it would another squandered emotion for both of them.
"James darling where have you . . ."
The blonde stopped short as she saw Lily curled up by the window. The two black dots had narrowed in on the unsuspecting victim. James was thankfully spared introductions as Delia walked right up and sneered.
"And who would this be?"
Lily's emerald eyes flew open in alarm. The sleep was gone and James could see the way her hand hovered over her robes warily. She was prepared for Delia to attack. From the way her eyes darkened he could say there was a good bet she would. The one thing he didn't understand was the way they stood there sizing each other up. There seemed to be more in their glares then when two guys got ready to brawl.
"Lillian Evans of House Gryffindor."
Delia whirled back to James, her sneer disappearing. His face was expressionless but Lily could see the defiance in the way he crossed his arms over his chest.
"James darling you don't have to sit with the Mudblood trash" she purred, "Malfoy and I were wondering where you had gone missing. I see now that little Miss Pathetic here had you locked away. My poor beloved, stuck here under some curse. Come along."
James didn't move, his eyes focusing on some spot around her neck. 'Ah yes, her and little Lucius Malfoy, how quaint. Well now I don't feel the least bit guilty about dumping her like yesterday's trash' he thought with an amused smile. Delia smiled back, never understanding in the least bit why he was grinning so cheerfully. He would have to do something about that mouth of hers. No one could call Lillian a Mudblood, least of all that blonde snob. He knew for a fact that there was a little muggle in her blood as well!
"Delia darling, I would like to introduce you properly. Lillian sweetheart rise. I would like you to meet yesteryears trash. Delia I would like you to meet my charming new girlfriend, Lillian Evans. There, now you can scamper off to Master Malfoy, you little Slytherin trollop. And invite him, at his nearest convenience, to kiss my arse!"
Delia gaped at him as he slid an arm around Lily's waist. It felt good to say the words, but as it was over he worried about the way Lily had taken it. He had messed up so many times, hopefully she didn't think he was using her to get even. He had been going to ask before, but she just wouldn't talk to him, and he doubted she would have taken it the right way then either. Luckily he didn't have to wait long after Delia stormed out furiously before Lily wrapped her slender arms around his neck and gave him the most mind-numbing kiss of all.
Lily and James waved cheerfully at the giant before they climbed into one of the carriages that would be taking them to the castle. Even when Lily had been going out with Frank Longbottom they had both shared different carriages. 'Maybe Frank just wasn't used to having a real girlfriend' she thought with a smile. He had been sweet but their feelings had always been lukewarm and it hadn't been worth fighting Alice over him. Now as she blushed furiously in the dark, Lily realized why it had happened. She had been primed by someone in the stars to be with James Potter.
"What are you giggling about my lovely?"
James pulled her closer into his sleepy embrace making sure to inhale as much of her as possible. The girl was intoxicating and for once he wasn't hell bent on screwing her before he found out her last name. It was his turn to chuckle, yes he wasn't intent on messing up this relationship. If he played his cards correctly he might actually get something worthwhile out of this. With Delia it had been all about getting shagged, but with Lily Evans . . .
"It's something else entirely."
It was Lily's turn to be confused. She had thought James had fallen asleep that way. 'No, his eyes are still open' she thought. But then, he hadn't said anything, what was he talking about?
"James? What are you talking about?"
He bent to place a kiss on her forehead before climbing out of the cart. They had arrived at the main gate without a scratch on them. He half expected for Voldemort to jump out of the shadows and slaughter them all. 'She's such a strong girl. Not once has she mentioned her family since that time in Blorish & Blotts.' He had barely been allowed to help her down before he was pegged in the head with a toy snitch. A grin lite up his face.
"Oy! My dear old Sirius Black. Still alive? I'd have thought your mother'd chopped you to pieces by now. And Remus as well. Bet the old wench didn't like that!"
Sirius barked with laughter but Remus seemed to have spaced out. James had known him to do that several times but when Sirius joined in with the staring fest he became startled. His best-friend wasn't one to go braindead. 'Maybe Old Lady Black did get the best of them' he thought suddenly. After a few seconds he walked beside them and inclined his neck to see exactly what had caught their eye. 'Oh God' he thought mortified. He could almost hear the words floating in her head, and as he looked back on that day years later, he was almost sure he had. 'What am I doing? I don't belong here, maybe I should just go straight up to Gryffindor tower and wait until he's alone. Or maybe I shouldn't wait at all. Look at the way his friends are staring at me in horror like I'm some filthy little mudblood who wouldn't be high enough to shine their boots. Oh come on Lily, pull it together, just walk away!' She had just about managed it as well before he slipped an arm around her waste.
"I'm sorry I just got caught up" he whispered in her ear.
She couldn't help acting so pathetic sometimes. Time was what she needed. Time to rest, to grieve, to get her head straight, to remember that life for her would go on. Everything was going in a blur and Lily wasn't quite sure what was happening. She just remembered introducing herself, shaking hands, and then going suddenly limp. Her eyes wouldn't focus, she could barely draw in her next breath. She watched, from a distance, as her body collapsed into James' loose hold. Watched as the boy Remus ran for Dumbledore. Watched James pick her up and run into the castle himself. Then came the many whispers, whispers she knew she would dread listening to the next day.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
A week later the fog began to release her and Lily was able to open her eyes. The infirmary was quiet, not even Madam Pomfrey seemed to be there. Inch by inch she raised herself until she could see more than the ceiling. Sleeping in the bed beside her was James. 'Did he get hurt somehow?' she wondered. The soft snoring made her think not. 'It's got to be almost lunch time, has he skipped classes all day?'
"What are you doing out of bed missy?"
Lily flinched, she'd been caught. Two bare arms grabbed her from behind and landed her straight on her back in the makeshift bed. Hovering over her she could see the charming grin that belonged to James. He didn't seem at all angry, more worried than anything.
"You've been gone for a week. I was starting to think I drove you to mental suicide."
Lily giggled as he laid a kiss on her mouth. There were at least two dozen roses in a vase beside her bed, which she briefly remembered being changed after the originals dried out. 'What's happened to me?' she thought, her good mood wilting.
"Where's Professor Dumbledore? I think I need to see him."
James didn't appear to be the least bit surprised at her request. Dumbledore had told him as much. Lily had pushed the pain and memory of her dead mother to the back of her mind, by not dealing with them she had made herself a thousand times worse. Now she had managed to let the grief make her sick. 'If she continues on in this manner she may end up dying herself.' James had never thought of grief this way and her cheerful mood now frightened him. He hadn't wanted to bring it up but she was still acting like her parents murders had never happened.
"James I'm fine, really. I'm just dying to get out of this bed. I can't let myself fall so behind in school work. Especially if I'm to . . . Just go fetch Dumbledore for me will you?"
The carefree tone turned to anger in the matter of a lightning strike. Dumbledore couldn't make her miss more school. She needed to make sure that she was strong enough when the time came to kill her sister and destroy Voldemort once and for all before he destroyed her. She didn't have time to sit around the infirmary and dawdle.
"Just calm down lovely. Take deep breaths and I'll go get the Headmaster for you."
Once he was gone and she was in the clear Lily began summoning books from all over the place.
"Accio Grimore, Accio spellbooks!"
By the time Dumbledore and James came racing in she had been hilighting and writing notes for almost ten minutes. It wasn't really a lot of time but Lily worked at a fast pace, she was swish-and-flicking everywhere. Things from mirrors to animals to patronus' were floating around the room. Dumbledore began his search for Madam Pomfrey and as he had suspected he found her frozen under the gigantic pinapple.
"Accio wand!" he shouted.
He caught her wand just in time. Lily had been about to try and go invisible. The damage she could have inflicted then would have been enormous. Beside him Dumbledore saw a terrified James Potter. Hagrid had told him of their little bond, he wasn't sure that if he stayed this boy would be unaffected.
"James, Lily is going to need someone when she comes out of this. She has no family, and I think therefore you should leave, lest you be detterred from having further contact."
James thought of what he said. Was it really smart to go against him? 'He might be right.'
"Professor, I think she needs me now more than ever. Shouldn't you ask me to stay?"
A/N: Lily's obviously having a breakdown right about now and she's gone haywire. But what will happen when she gets better . . . is she really going to be the same?
