My tea's gone cold I'm wondering why I..
got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'll all be gray,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad..
1st Chorus: volume gradually grows over raindrop background
2nd Chorus: full volume with beat right after "thunder" noise
[Gladys Gudgeon]
Dear Gilderoy, I wrote but you still ain't callin
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em
There probably was a problem in the owl service or somethin
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
but anyways; fuck it, what's been up? Man how's your daughter?
I'm pregnant too, I'm bout to be a mother
If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her?
I'ma name her gilly
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too I'm sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some witch who didn't want him
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with Skam
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Rawkus too, that shit was fat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Gladys
{Chorus: Ginny}
[Gladys']
Dear gilderoy, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance
I ain't mad - I just think it's FUCKED UP you don't answer fans
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside the bookshop
you didn't have to, but you coulda signed an autograph for Martha
That's my little sister man, she's only six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
four hours and you just said, "No."
That's pretty shitty man - you're like her fuckin idol
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like bein lied to
Remember when we met in Denver - you said if I'd write you
you would write back - see I'm just like you in a way
I never knew my father neither;
he used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
I can relate to what you're saying in your books
so when I have a shitty day, I drift away and take em out
cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
Sometimes I even brush my gums until they bleed
It's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
My husband's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7
But he don't know you like I know you Gil, no one does
She don't know what it was like for people like us growin up
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Gladys -- P.S.
We should be together too
{Chorus: Ginny}
[Ginny']
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
this'll be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm on my broom right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Gilderoy, I drank a fifth of butterbeer, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped +ALL+ of your pictures off the wall
I love you Gilderoy, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Gilderoy; {*screaming*} Shut up cat! I'm tryin to talk!
Hey Gilderoy, that's my cat screamin in the trunk
but I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how'm I supposed to send this shit out?
{*car tires squeal*} {*CRASH*}
.. {*brief silence*} .. {*LOUD splash*}
{Chorus: Ginny}
[Gilderoy]
Dear Gladys, I meant to write you sooner but I just been busy
You said your pregnant now, how far along is you?
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
and here's an autograph for your sister,
I wrote it on my photograph
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the shop, I musta missed you
Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But what's this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit just clownin dogg,
c'mon - how fucked up is you?
You got some issues Gladys, I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when you get down some
And what's this shit about us meant to be together?
That type of shit'll make me not want us to meet each other
I really think you and your husband need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine
if you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but Gladys
why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
I just don't want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit in the prophet a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some chick was drunk and flew her broom over a bridge
and had cat in the trunk, and she was mated with a pig
and in the car they found a tape, but they didn't say who it was to
Come to think about, her name was.. it was you
Damn!
[Gilderoy proceeds to look sad for a moment then checks his reflection and
carries on with his fan male] [Ginny weasley is outside, she walks away
with a diary]