My Immortal
I do not own the song "My Immortal" sung by Evanescence nor Sailor Moon.
-----------------------
I sit alone in a darkened room. The only light shining in the room was the small music light postioned above above my music. My fingers lightly caressed the ivory of the keys, my eyes watering at remembering how everything just went wrong.
It had been shortly after my 21st birthday. We were having problems again. Mostly due to my wanting to keep you happy and never telling you what was wrong. Despite the fact I promised to stop doing that.
But, lying came so easily for me. Just like you being a terriable liah was easy for you. It was one of your best qualities. Where as mine...
I shut you out, and I let you leave. So many times...And I would always go back to you when you needed me. I needed you just as much if not more. Your beautiful, smiling face kept me going. And now, weeks later...
You'll never know just how much it hurts inside to see you with him. To see you smiling and laughing. Promising him the same things you not too long ao promised me..
All I want to do is disappear. I want you to leave me alone. But you're my drug...I need to still be with you, even as a friend, to survive.
At least for now.
I open my eyes, not sure when I closed them, feeling the tears waiting to fall. I blink and try very hard not to cry. You hurt me time and time again. But I can't push the blame on you entirely. I let you do it..I let you back in and I let you continue to kill my heart with your love.
I don't want to love again if it means I have to be hurt. You promised to never hurt me...to always love me. And like the blinded fool I was and still am, I believed you.
My figners gently push against the white ivory keys, slowly at first, the tunes seeming off and random. Then I bring my other hand up and the sounds become fluid, flowing from my broken heart and through my fingers.
Tears began to flow down my face as I played, thinking back on how I helped you through the many tests and trials in your life. I tried letting you help me when I had problems...But the more I opened up, the more I lost you.
But, I know in my heart that no matter what I do...No matter how much I may say I hate you...I'll forever be your fool, waiting for you to come back.
I continue to play, my eyes closing again, the tears flowing more. My mouth feels dry yet wet at the same time, and my voice cracks slightly as I begin to quietly sing to myself.
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all of my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
"You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
"I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me"
As I stop my song, my grief finally wins out and my stomache begins to hurt most painfully. My arms wrap around tightly around my stomache, as my sobs rack my body violently. My head rests on the keys of the piano, me eyes tightly shut as the tears flow from my eyes as a flood.
"Please Usagi.....please....save me...."
I do not own the song "My Immortal" sung by Evanescence nor Sailor Moon.
-----------------------
I sit alone in a darkened room. The only light shining in the room was the small music light postioned above above my music. My fingers lightly caressed the ivory of the keys, my eyes watering at remembering how everything just went wrong.
It had been shortly after my 21st birthday. We were having problems again. Mostly due to my wanting to keep you happy and never telling you what was wrong. Despite the fact I promised to stop doing that.
But, lying came so easily for me. Just like you being a terriable liah was easy for you. It was one of your best qualities. Where as mine...
I shut you out, and I let you leave. So many times...And I would always go back to you when you needed me. I needed you just as much if not more. Your beautiful, smiling face kept me going. And now, weeks later...
You'll never know just how much it hurts inside to see you with him. To see you smiling and laughing. Promising him the same things you not too long ao promised me..
All I want to do is disappear. I want you to leave me alone. But you're my drug...I need to still be with you, even as a friend, to survive.
At least for now.
I open my eyes, not sure when I closed them, feeling the tears waiting to fall. I blink and try very hard not to cry. You hurt me time and time again. But I can't push the blame on you entirely. I let you do it..I let you back in and I let you continue to kill my heart with your love.
I don't want to love again if it means I have to be hurt. You promised to never hurt me...to always love me. And like the blinded fool I was and still am, I believed you.
My figners gently push against the white ivory keys, slowly at first, the tunes seeming off and random. Then I bring my other hand up and the sounds become fluid, flowing from my broken heart and through my fingers.
Tears began to flow down my face as I played, thinking back on how I helped you through the many tests and trials in your life. I tried letting you help me when I had problems...But the more I opened up, the more I lost you.
But, I know in my heart that no matter what I do...No matter how much I may say I hate you...I'll forever be your fool, waiting for you to come back.
I continue to play, my eyes closing again, the tears flowing more. My mouth feels dry yet wet at the same time, and my voice cracks slightly as I begin to quietly sing to myself.
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all of my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
"You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
"These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
"I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
"When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And i've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me"
As I stop my song, my grief finally wins out and my stomache begins to hurt most painfully. My arms wrap around tightly around my stomache, as my sobs rack my body violently. My head rests on the keys of the piano, me eyes tightly shut as the tears flow from my eyes as a flood.
"Please Usagi.....please....save me...."
