Disclaimer: List of Things to Do: (1) Pay bills. (2) Buy groceries.
(3) Get car inspected. (4) See shrink because LoK really isn't mine.
(5) Release ill-tempered, malnourished, mutant monkeys into the city
streets.heh heh heh.
Do My Eyes Look Bloodshot to You?
I swore that bunny was gonna kill me. I high tailed it outta there. I ran until I could run no more. Eventually I found this little cave to hide in. It was already inhabited, so I had to fight to the death for the safety of the cave. That rock moss totally got its arse kicked. That'll teach 'im. I sat in that cave for a day and a half, not daring to sleep a wink. Somehow, Zephon tracked me down.
ZEPHON: There you are, wench! Come out of there!
MIKOTO: No way! I stole my cave fair and square! Just ask the moss!
ZEPHON: Don't make me drag you out!
MIKOTO: Only if you answer me one thing.
ZEPHON: What?
MIKOTO: Do I looked stoned to you?
ZEPHON: (confused) Uh, no?
MIKOTO: C'mon. Really. I've been awake for three days. Do my eyes look all bloodshot?
ZEPHON: Well, kind of, I guess.
MIKOTO: (horrified) Then I DO look stoned!
ZEPHON: Not really.
MIKOTO: You say my eyes are bloodshot, but I don't look stoned. Do you even know what getting stoned is?
ZEPHON: Well, yeah. But usually when you stone someone, they end up all bloody and dead and stuff.
MIKOTO: (rolling my eyes) Nevermind.
Zephon led me back to the Sanctuary. Thank god those crickets I was hearing didn't come out and attack me. Back at the Sanctuary, things seemed to have gotten weirder. Melchiah had dug this really deep pit. He was leaning over it, looking down inside, holding a rope that was dangling down into the pit.
MELCHIAH: It puts the lotion on the skin and then it. (how does the rest of this go?) .puts it back again.
MIKOTO: Woah. Now that's just creepy.
ZEPHON: Just keep walking. Don't look at him. Just keep walking.
We entered the pillar chamber. Raziel, Turel, Rahab, and Dumah were present. Surprisingly, Dumah's head had finally grown back, although, it was still quite disfigured.
MIKOTO: Hey Dumah! Nice to see ya again!
DUMAH: (grumbles)
(Dumah turns his attention back to Turel, who is trying to give the newly revived vampire something.)
MIKOTO: (to Raziel) What's Turel doing?
RAZIEL: (snickers) I can't believe he's gonna fall for it again!
MIKOTO: Don't tell me he isn't doing THAT again!
RAZIEL: (laughs hysterically) Yeah!
MIKOTO: But he just grew his head back! And you're making him sniff that gunpowder stuff again?
RAZIEL: YES!!
(Unfortunately for Dumah, Raziel is right. Turel has convinced Dumah the Dumbass to sniff more of his special gunpowder mix. While we wait for Kain to arrive, I go over to Rahab to say hello.)
MIKOTO: Hello, Rahab.
RAHAB: (sighs)
MIKOTO: What's wrong?
RAHAB: Isn't she the most beautiful thing?
MIKOTO: Who?
RAHAB: Her. (points to his Little Mermaid band-aid, which he no longer needs; he just continues to wear it anyway)
MIKOTO: I hate to disappoint you, but she isn't real.
RAHAB: (defensively) She IS so! And one day we're gonna get married! You'll see!
KAIN: Who are you going to marry?
MIKOTO: Ariel.
KAIN: ARIEL?? Why in the world would you want to marry that ghoulish creature! Half of her face is missing and she doesn't even have any feet! Sure, she might've been pretty once, when she was still alive, but she's a hideous she-beast now!
ARIEL: (having materialized upon hearing her name) You ungrateful jerk! (smacks him with a chunk of the balance pillar) See if I ever take you out on a date again! (dematerializes)
ZEPHON: Ariel took you out on a date? (snickers)
KAIN: (rubs lump on his head) Shut up!
RAHAB: Actually, I'm going to marry a different Ariel. (pines over the mermaid band-aid)
Well, I was finally back in the safety of the Sanctuary. That is, if you could say that a human in the middle of a bunch of vampires is safe. I felt pretty safe anyway. At least Bambi wouldn't try to kill me with his AK-47 in here.
REVIEW RESPONSE:
Wolfywoman: Actually, no I really didn't know that. I guess the vamps don't either. But it's very interesting. Maybe that's how I'll end this thing, 'cause I really didn't know how I was going to. Anyway, this is just dumb humor, or really bad humor, or both.so I guess it doesn't really matter. I just wanted to be silly. So no, I don't take it as a flame.
Lilith: I'm glad you likes it! I wasn't sure if this was really funny or not without someone else's opinion. I just can't seem to laugh at my own jokes. Anyway, Clyde says 'Hi' and he's been bugging me to get your phone number. Um, oh yeah, I was planning on a reverse psychology thing, but.Nosgoth is scary! All the daisies and chirping birds and happy things. (shudders) Oh, and thanks for pointing out that Rahab/Melchiah mistake! I fixed it! I guess I shouldn't write fanfic at 3 a.m. huh?
Do My Eyes Look Bloodshot to You?
I swore that bunny was gonna kill me. I high tailed it outta there. I ran until I could run no more. Eventually I found this little cave to hide in. It was already inhabited, so I had to fight to the death for the safety of the cave. That rock moss totally got its arse kicked. That'll teach 'im. I sat in that cave for a day and a half, not daring to sleep a wink. Somehow, Zephon tracked me down.
ZEPHON: There you are, wench! Come out of there!
MIKOTO: No way! I stole my cave fair and square! Just ask the moss!
ZEPHON: Don't make me drag you out!
MIKOTO: Only if you answer me one thing.
ZEPHON: What?
MIKOTO: Do I looked stoned to you?
ZEPHON: (confused) Uh, no?
MIKOTO: C'mon. Really. I've been awake for three days. Do my eyes look all bloodshot?
ZEPHON: Well, kind of, I guess.
MIKOTO: (horrified) Then I DO look stoned!
ZEPHON: Not really.
MIKOTO: You say my eyes are bloodshot, but I don't look stoned. Do you even know what getting stoned is?
ZEPHON: Well, yeah. But usually when you stone someone, they end up all bloody and dead and stuff.
MIKOTO: (rolling my eyes) Nevermind.
Zephon led me back to the Sanctuary. Thank god those crickets I was hearing didn't come out and attack me. Back at the Sanctuary, things seemed to have gotten weirder. Melchiah had dug this really deep pit. He was leaning over it, looking down inside, holding a rope that was dangling down into the pit.
MELCHIAH: It puts the lotion on the skin and then it. (how does the rest of this go?) .puts it back again.
MIKOTO: Woah. Now that's just creepy.
ZEPHON: Just keep walking. Don't look at him. Just keep walking.
We entered the pillar chamber. Raziel, Turel, Rahab, and Dumah were present. Surprisingly, Dumah's head had finally grown back, although, it was still quite disfigured.
MIKOTO: Hey Dumah! Nice to see ya again!
DUMAH: (grumbles)
(Dumah turns his attention back to Turel, who is trying to give the newly revived vampire something.)
MIKOTO: (to Raziel) What's Turel doing?
RAZIEL: (snickers) I can't believe he's gonna fall for it again!
MIKOTO: Don't tell me he isn't doing THAT again!
RAZIEL: (laughs hysterically) Yeah!
MIKOTO: But he just grew his head back! And you're making him sniff that gunpowder stuff again?
RAZIEL: YES!!
(Unfortunately for Dumah, Raziel is right. Turel has convinced Dumah the Dumbass to sniff more of his special gunpowder mix. While we wait for Kain to arrive, I go over to Rahab to say hello.)
MIKOTO: Hello, Rahab.
RAHAB: (sighs)
MIKOTO: What's wrong?
RAHAB: Isn't she the most beautiful thing?
MIKOTO: Who?
RAHAB: Her. (points to his Little Mermaid band-aid, which he no longer needs; he just continues to wear it anyway)
MIKOTO: I hate to disappoint you, but she isn't real.
RAHAB: (defensively) She IS so! And one day we're gonna get married! You'll see!
KAIN: Who are you going to marry?
MIKOTO: Ariel.
KAIN: ARIEL?? Why in the world would you want to marry that ghoulish creature! Half of her face is missing and she doesn't even have any feet! Sure, she might've been pretty once, when she was still alive, but she's a hideous she-beast now!
ARIEL: (having materialized upon hearing her name) You ungrateful jerk! (smacks him with a chunk of the balance pillar) See if I ever take you out on a date again! (dematerializes)
ZEPHON: Ariel took you out on a date? (snickers)
KAIN: (rubs lump on his head) Shut up!
RAHAB: Actually, I'm going to marry a different Ariel. (pines over the mermaid band-aid)
Well, I was finally back in the safety of the Sanctuary. That is, if you could say that a human in the middle of a bunch of vampires is safe. I felt pretty safe anyway. At least Bambi wouldn't try to kill me with his AK-47 in here.
REVIEW RESPONSE:
Wolfywoman: Actually, no I really didn't know that. I guess the vamps don't either. But it's very interesting. Maybe that's how I'll end this thing, 'cause I really didn't know how I was going to. Anyway, this is just dumb humor, or really bad humor, or both.so I guess it doesn't really matter. I just wanted to be silly. So no, I don't take it as a flame.
Lilith: I'm glad you likes it! I wasn't sure if this was really funny or not without someone else's opinion. I just can't seem to laugh at my own jokes. Anyway, Clyde says 'Hi' and he's been bugging me to get your phone number. Um, oh yeah, I was planning on a reverse psychology thing, but.Nosgoth is scary! All the daisies and chirping birds and happy things. (shudders) Oh, and thanks for pointing out that Rahab/Melchiah mistake! I fixed it! I guess I shouldn't write fanfic at 3 a.m. huh?
