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Dream Maker: Well folks, standard yada. I do not own Gundam Wing. *sniffs* I wish I did but I don't. The G-boys and girls belong to their respectable owners. I am just using them for this twisted fic. I promise to return them, only slightly worse for the wear when we're through with them. Um.. Anything else?
Christa: Normally we would NEVER work with this pairing but a friend issued us a challenge fic and we can't turn that down without tarnishing our honor as writers. *sigh* The only g-boy pairing we approve of is the 3x4 pairing.. Yaio fic, 2x5 pairing. A little bit of near death and that kind of stuff. nothing major.
Dream Keeper: Don't hurt us if you don't like the pairing. Just go away. Other than that, this is a one shot, so enjoy!
"blah" - speech (duh!)
/blah/ -- personal thoughts
[Blah] - writing
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Wufei woke to a loud buzzing in his ear. He looked at the alarm clock next to his bed and sighed. Yet another day of school that he didn't want to endure. It was bad enough that he was attending a preppy college, but on top of all that he had the worst roommate.
"Wufei, it's too damn early, shut that piece of shit off," his roommate called as he lobbed a pillow at him.
"It's five thirty, you should get up," he advised his lazy partner. All he received in reply was a very rude hand gesture. "Suit yourself," he replied as he got up to take a shower. As he passed by his desk he vaguely noted that he hadn't finished all of his assigned work the night before. /Yet another thing to do this morning./
With a sigh Wufei gathered his clothes and headed towards the common bathroom down the hall. If there was one thing he hated about colleges it was the common bathrooms. The only thing good about it was you didn't have to clean them yourself. /How did I end up here?/ he wondered as he stripped out of his clothes and turned on the water. /Why did I have to get stuck with Maxwell as a roommate?/
Wufei remembered the day very well that he'd gotten the news of just who he was going to be rooming with for the year. He'd been sitting outside on the porch swing at the g-boys' house when he'd gotten the letter. They'd all been accepted into one of the most prestigious schools on the continent, thanks to Quatre and a little computer hacking, but no one was excited about more schooling.
/I'm going to be a Preventer so I don't know why I'm even here./
He'd opened the letter to see exactly what books he need to pick up, but when he'd read the notice about room arrangements being final he'd blown a gasket. Amazingly enough, Duo had had the same reaction.
/It's about the only time the braided onna and I have ever agreed on anything./ All of a sudden the water turned ice cold, shattering Wufei's musings and making him leap out of the shower. "Damn!" he cursed, wanting to vent his anger somehow. Reluctantly accepting defeat, yet again from the shower, he toweled off and got dressed.
When he entered his room the clock on his nightstand read six o'clock and Duo was still asleep. With a shrug, Wufei sat down at his desk and tried to complete his work before his first class. At seven, fifteen minutes before their shared English class, Wufei got tired of waiting on the lazy lump and went and got a pitcher of ice water. He noticed it felt particularly good upending it over Duo's bed.
"DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!" Duo screamed as he leaped out of bed.
"Fifteen until class," Wufei said, leaving the room.
***
Duo watched Wufei leave and growled in frustration. After being in the same dorm with him for the past few months he still wasn't feeling any differently. He'd thought that, since Wufei was always such an asshole to him, he'd get over his crush.
/I wish. All that's happened is its gotten worse. Thank god he doesn't change in here or I'd probably loose it./ Duo thought as he unbraided his messy hair and started to brush it out. With its length reaching almost down to his knees when it was unbraided, it was his pride and joy. /I think it's the only thing in this world I can care about more than his royal grumpiness./
"Duo, are you coming or what?" Wufei asked through the door as he was rummaging around in his drawers for something to wear.
"Yeah, I'm comin'. Hold your horses!" Duo shot back, not having to act to color his voice with annoyance. /Will he ever understand?/
***
"If that braided idiot doesn't hurry up, I'm going to leave without him," Wufei swore to himself. He was already almost late for class and he didn't want any extra homework tonight. Finally, two minutes before class started, Duo finally immerged. "It's about time!" Wufei growled as he started towards the door.
"You know, you don't have to wait on me," Duo reminded him. "And you could have woken me up a little nicer this morning."
"I did, but you didn't choose to get up," Wufei shot back tartly.
"It was five freaking thirty in the morning! What sane person would be up then?"
"Anyone who wants at least a luke-warm shower," Wufei grumbled. Any later and the girls would use all the hot water, and you'd be stuck with water so cold it'd shrivel your dick.
"That's why you learn to take your showers at night!" Duo said as they arrived at their class. Just as they took their seats the bell rang. Both of the young men let out a sigh of relief and prepared themselves for another boring lesson.
~*~
Later that day, during lunch, Duo thought back over the mornings events and decided to go to the store. It took him a while to track Wufei down, but in the end he managed. "Hey, Wufei, could you lend me your car for a few minutes?" Duo asked him. He put on his most charming smile, but his friend seemed unaffected.
"Go find someone else who's crazy enough to trust their wheels to you. You're S.O.L. with me," Wufei said as he stalked off. (SOL== Shit outta luck!)
"Sheesh, what's eating him?" Duo asked, turning back to the rest of the boys.
"Don't know. I'd guess he's still mad about whatever you did this morning," Heero told him.
"But I didn't do anything!"
"Evidently then, its something you didn't do," Trowa said.
Duo resigned himself to the fact that his friends would never side with him in an argument between him and Wufei. They didn't think he was responsible enough to do anything Wufei accused him of _not_ doing. "Fine, will one of you let me borrow your car?"
"Sorry," Trowa said as he stood to leave. "Mine's in the shop."
Heero followed his lead and called back over his shoulder, "Relena took mine to go to lunch. Sorry."
"Sorry my foot," Duo muttered as he headed back to the dorm to get his books for his next class.
~*~
"Just a couple of miles down the road, but will anyone give me a ride? No!" Duo grumbled as he walked down the side of the road towards Jack's Store. Three miles seemed like a long ways on foot when it was starting to rain. "Man, I hope it doesn't start pouring before I get back to the dorm. Please, just let me get back first," Duo pleaded with the weather.
Evidently it had other plans because just as he reached the store the skies opened up and started dropping water in sheets. Duo looked outside and felt his resolve not to get angry at his friends crumble. As quickly as he could he bought his alarm clock and went back out into the storm. He kept his pace at a jog the whole way back to the campus, but even at that, by the time he got there he was soaked and chilled to the bone.
"Where have you been, Maxwell?" Wufei asked, barely looking up from his work when Duo came dripping into the room. "You look like hell."
"Well thank you for that observation, Wufei! I wouldn't have known that if you hadn't told me! I'm so glad I have someone like you to tell me things that anyone with an ounce of sense could observe!" Duo shouted as he headed for their shared bedroom.
"God, what's eating you?" Wufei snapped, his mood turning sour.
"I don't know, maybe the fact that I asked you to lend me your car for five minutes so I could go to the store and buy a damned alarm clock but no! You thought I wasn't responsible enough so now I'm soaked, I'm cold, and I'm in a bad mood. Shut up and deal with it!" he fumed, wanting nothing more than to pound some sense into the head of the person he loved.
"It's your own fault that you've earned the title of irresponsible," Wufei snapped as he gathered his books, got up, and left.
/Maybe it is my own fault, but at least I'm _trying_ to change./ Duo thought back to all the things he'd been doing over the past few months. He'd stopped blowing all his money on useless junk, he'd stopped going to parties for the most part, he studied, he maintained a B average, he completed almost all of his homework, and now he'd gotten an alarm clock so Wufei wouldn't have to wait on him anymore.
/They could at least acknowledge the fact that I'm trying./ he thought as he changed out of his wet clothes and crawled into bed to get warm before he did his homework.
***
Wufei stalked down the hall to Heero and Trowa's room and knocked on the door. Trowa answered it and beckoned for him to come in.
"What's he done this time?" Heero asked the second he walked into the room.
"Maxwell's just being his normal irresponsible self and blaming everyone else for his problems," Wufei fumed as he remembered their exchange or words. For some reason that he couldn't fathom, he was actually slightly hurt by what his friend had said.
"You have to admit," Quatre said from the couch, "He has been trying to shape up his act. His grades reflect it and he's starting to become more considerate of others too. He told me he was getting an alarm clock so you wouldn't have to wait on him in the mornings anymore."
Wufei plopped himself down on the floor and said nothing. /Maybe I am being too hard on the braided idiot. What am I saying? It's Maxwell we're talking about here!/
"Hey, does anyone understand how to do the Advanced Trig. problems?" Trowa asked as he poured over his math book.
"Sure, I'll help you," Heero said. The four friends passed the rest of the night in near silence, only broken if one of them needed help. Normally Duo would be there, jabbering away as he worked, but tonight he was in his room sulking, or so his friends thought.
~*~
Wufei's alarm clock went off at the same time the next morning that it had every morning for the past few months. He waited a moment for Duo's customary hurl of insults, but for once it never came. Not thinking much of it, Wufei shrugged and went off to shower. When he came back her sat down on his bed and read for a long time.
At six thirty his alarm went off again and he reached over to shut it off, only to realize that it wasn't his alarm going off. It was Duo's. /Oh, and I thought he was lying about getting the alarm. Guess I shouldn't have gotten so mad last night./
"Hey, Duo, you going to turn that thing off or what?" Only a muffled moan answered him. Wufei, who was getting tired of the sound by then, walked over and shut the thing off. "You know, if you're going to own the thing, it might help if you use it too," he snapped. Again he waited for Duo to retaliate, but his friend didn't move.
One glance around the room showed him that Duo's books were still in the same place this morning as they'd been when he'd left the night before. His pajama's were still lying across the back of his chair, and no clothes littered the floor. "Duo?" Wufei asked as he flipped on Duo's beside lamp and leaned down to look at his friend's face.
Duo's face was pale, almost as pale as his sheets, but his cheeks were flushed with fever. When Wufei gingerly touched his forehead he pulled his hand back from the heat he felt there. Quickly he left the dorm room to tell his friends he wouldn't be in class. Then he brought an extra blanket and some cold medicine he'd borrowed from the others into the room.
"Duo," he said, keeping his voice soft in case his friend had a headache.
"What?" Duo managed to mutter. He was freezing and wanted nothing more than to huddle down under his blankets and sleep.
"You have a really bad cold and you need to take a dose of this crap," Wufei said to him. He managed to get his friend to take the medicine and drink some water before he let him fall back asleep. Only then did it occur to him to take his temperature.
/How did my mother do it when I wouldn't open my mouth?/ He wrinkled his nose in disgust when he remembered that she'd stick it under his arm, but decided that he could disinfect the thermometer later.
101.3 the thermometer read a few minutes later when he checked it. At the same time, Duo turned over in his sleep, causing his blankets to slip off of him. Wufei noticed that all down his side was soaked, though he couldn't imagine what from.
/Wait, didn't I pour water in his bed yesterday?/ Wufei silently cursed himself for being so stupid as not to remember before. /Now I wish one of the other guys was here to help me./
"Hey Duo," Wufei said, gently shaking his friend. "Duo, wake up."
Duo groaned and muttered, "Just let me sleep. Go to class."
Wufei sighed and reigned in his temper, remembering to have patience. "Your fever is too high for me to leave right now, and I'm broke so I can't call a doctor. I need you to at least wake up enough to hold yourself up."
Duo's eyes cracked open and he looked at his friend for a moment before heaving himself into a sitting position. He tried to stand but his legs would cooperate and he sat heavily back down on the bed.
"Get your shirt off," Wufei commanded.
"What?" Duo asked, surprised even through the fog his fever had him in.
"Your wet because of the water I poured over you yesterday morning and I need you out of those wet clothes," Wufei explained patiently. Duo nodded dumbly and stripped out of his shirt. He then let his friend help him to stand and get him to the other bed.
"Why-,"
"Your bed is wet Duo. You need to be dry," Wufei said again. /This is going to be a real test of my patience./ he thought as he started to devoid Duo of his pants. He thought about leaving him in his underwear but decided against it, much to his dismay.
/Knowing Duo he'd just get sicker, just to torture me. I hope he doesn't get the flue./ A little corner of his mind marveled that he cared, while his logical side passed it off as not wanting to smell puke while he slept from now on.
Duo, who's head was growing fuzzier by the moment, barely realized Wufei was striping him until he felt _all_ his bare skin touch the warm, dry sheets of Wufei's bed. Against his will his body reacted to the oh-so- wanted sensation.
"What the hell, Maxwell?" Wufei asked and Duo hastily pulled the covers over himself.
"It's not exactly something I can control," Duo muttered as he turned over to face the wall, pulling the covers up to his chin.
"What do you mean by that?" Wufei asked, perplexed.
"I'm gay, all right Wufei? Now do you want to go to class instead of taking care of me?" /God, why today? Why couldn't I tell him when I can stand up for myself when he ridicules me?/
"No, I already told you that I couldn't leave you. Do you have a blowdryer?"
"Dresser," Duo muttered still waiting to be made fun of, laughed at by the object of his affection.
***
/He's gay? He's really gay?/ Wufei thought as he unbraided Duo's hair, brushed it out, and started drying it. It felt satiny smooth in his hands and induced reactions in him that he'd never expected before. Roughly he pushed the feelings away, intent upon ignoring them until he had time to examine them.
"What're you doin this for?" Do asked, his words slightly slurred together from exhaustion.
"Because if you died, our friends would never forgive me," Wufei replied curtly.
"Oh, sound like you care," Duo muttered as he fell back to sleep, enjoying the sensation of his friend playing with his hair.
/He really shouldn't trust me like this. How many times have I threatened to cut his braid off?/ Wufei wondered but immediately dismissed the idea. For some reason, he just didn't want to see Duo without his signature braid.
/Why'd he tell me he was gay, anyway? If he's so embarrassed about it he could have at least told me that he hadn't gotten any in a while and was hallucinating about a girl./
Wufei thought back to the one time _he'd_ had to sleep with is wife and shuddered. He'd woken up the next morning feeling dirty and disgusted. When his friends asked him about it, he'd had to tell them many lies to keep them from suspecting he was different. Meilan had been the only one who'd ever known the truth about how he really felt.
/What does this mean? I've never like girls much. Does this mean.?/ Wufei shoved the thought away roughly and finished taking care of his friend. When he was done he stripped Duo's bed and propped the mattress up against a wall so it would dry before he sat back to study. He had a major test coming up and he wanted to be as prepared for it as he could.
/Of course this means I'll have double the work tomorrow. Couldn't he at least have had the decency to get sick on a weekend?/
~*~
"Hey, 'Fei, could I have some water?" Duo asked hours later after Wufei took his temperature. Wufei looked at the clock on the wall and discovered it was nearly two in the afternoon.
"Sure." The rest of the guys had been by at lunch to check on their sick comrade, but they'd had classes to get back to. "But you'll have to take more of this cold medicine. It's been over six hours."
"Sure," Duo said, his words muffled by his pillow. Wufei left the room and returned a few minutes later bearing water and a bowl of chicken noodle soup.
"Wake up," he said, setting the tray down beside the bed. "You need to eat something or all this will be for nothing. You usually eat like a horse so this can't be good for you." He settled down at his desk and watched as his friend brushed away the last wisps of the fog of sleep and sat up.
"Thank you so much Wufei," he snapped, glaring across the room at him. "Are you going to insult everything else about me to? What, am I too girlish for your taste? Does your skin crawl from being in the same room as a gay guy? Do you hate the fact that I actually have a sense or humor? Go on, say what you wan, since you seem so intent upon insulting _everything_ I do."
Wufei just sat there, staring dumbly at him. He'd only meant his comment as a joke, but Duo had clearly taken it entirely the wrong way.
"God, I didn't mean anything by it Maxwell. I just meant that you usually consume a hell of a lot more than you have today and you need to eat something. It was just a joke." Wufei shot back tartly. "What is your problem?"
"It should be kind of obvious, but if you don't understand then never mind," Duo said moodily as he picked at his food.
/What the hell is up with him? I'm not acting any different than normal, so why is he acting this way?/
***
/Why can't he just understand?/
"Spit it out, Maxwell," Wufei said, folding his arms over his chest. "You've started the conversation, now finish it."
"Fine," Duo said, his anger boiling over. "I'm tired of you insulting me every chance you get. It may seem like a big joke to you, but did you ever stop to think that maybe it does hurt? Its not bad enough that you're always calling me a woman, but last week you were insulting me because." he choked. "Because I'm not only a bastard, but an orphaned one. And you're always saying crap about the way I dress, or eat, or act, and I'm tired of it! I have feelings too and I'm tired of having them walked all over.
"I appreciate what you've done for me today, but I can't help but be angry with you. I've tried to change, become more responsible, but nothing I can do seems to have any affect on you. You don't give me a shred of respect and I'm tired of it!" he finished, raising his voice to make a point.
/Why doesn't he just understand? Why must he always be so cruel to me? Am I just never meant to have true happiness? Am I cursed to always have the people I love leave me?/
"I'm sorry, Maxwell. I hadn't realized you felt that way," Wufei said, a small amount of guilt creeping into his voice. He hadn't realized that much of what he said to him was derogatory.
"It's fine, just forget I ever said anything," Duo said flatly. He set his empty soup bowl aside, took a swig of water and lay back down.
Wufei looked at the clock on the wall and contemplated what to do next. "Can you stay by yourself for a little while?" he asked, wondering if he should leave Duo alone.
"I've been alone most of my life. Half an hour won't kill me," he said bitterly.
"Okay, see you in a few." Wufei got up and left silently.
Duo waited until the door was shut before giving into silent tears. /He doesn't even realize. Will he ever? Will he ever understand how much I love him?/
***
/What the hell is eating him? He's been acting so strangely since he told me he's gay./ Wufei pondered the question as he waited for his friends to get out of their classes. He was waiting near on of the benches right outside the school, across the campus from the dorms. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the bell rang.
"Hey, Wufei!" Quatre called as he walked towards him. Wufei lifted his hand in greeting, but didn't acknowledge his friend otherwise. He was still pondering Duo's weird attitude.
"What's up? Duo do something else to piss you off?" Heero asked.
"No, actually, he hasn't today. He's been a pain, but I'll let him slide because he's sick," Wufei answered, falling into the familiar pattern of their conversations.
"So how's he doing?" Trowa asked.
"Better. His temp's down to 99.5, and he's looking a lot more alert, but I think he's still going to miss class tomorrow. If he tries it, I will tie him up and handcuff him to his bed."
"Be careful Wufei," Quatre joked. "You're actually sounding like you're starting to care." His smile faded when he caught the look on his friends' face. "What's up?"
"Has Duo said anything to you guys about me insulting him?" he asked. All three of his friends became noticeably uncomfortable.
"He has complained about it a time or two," Trowa said carefully. Wufei noticed that he was being very careful about the way he phrased him comment.
"I have a feeling there's more to this than your telling me," he accused them.
"It's really not our place," Quatre began.
"For what? Duo complains all the time," Heero said, as in the dark as Wufei.
"Not your place to tell me that Duo's gay?" Wufei asked, watching his friends face closely. Quatre colored and nodded slightly.
"Duo's gay?" Heero said, louder than he meant to because a few heads in the courtyard swung around. Trowa punched him roughly, causing the perfect soldier to wince.
"Nice going, Heero. He didn't want the whole damn school to know!" he admonished.
"Yes, that wasn't our place to tell you," Quatre said, again phrasing his sentences very carefully.
"Just what are you tip-toeing around?" Wufei asked, noticing the Arab's discomfort.
"Well, Duo is, er. well." Trowa started to say, trying to find the right words to explain.
"Its pretty obvious to anyone, well, to us at least," Quatre said, indicating himself and Trowa, "That Duo is completely and totally smitten with you."
Wufei blinked in surprise. That would explain so much about what had happened today. But were they really correct?
"He's in love with me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
Trowa nodded. "Anyone could tell by the way he looks at you. I remember catching a few looks like that from Quatre before we got together." He smiled slightly at his life partner. They had been very careful to keep their relationship discreet because of all the problems it could cause where they were. Wufei nodded, his eyes betraying that his mind was elsewhere.
"Don't you dare lead him on," Quatre said, suddenly feeling fiercely protective. "I will personally skin you alive if you do something like that to him. Oh, don't look at me like that. I know you're perfectly capable of doing just that, but I'm not sure if you would."
"Quatre, I may be a 'psychopathic asshole who rants about justice all day', but that is lower than I would ever sink, thank you," Wufei said, quoting the exact words Duo had said to him months back. "Anyway, I gotta get back."
"See ya," the guy's said as they moved to go to their final classes.
/That explains so much about him./ Wufei thought as he watched his friends go. /He's always acted funny around us, especially me of late. No wonder he asked me not to change in the room when we first got assigned together. He wanted to keep it a secret./
***
When Wufei entered the dorm, Duo was lying where he'd left him, half- asleep. His eyes opened when he entered the room, but he said nothing, opting to let his friend sort things out. Undoubtedly he would have talked to Quatre already.
Wufei took a seat at his desk, and looked at Duo for the longest time. Duo had to resist the urge to squirm under his piercing gaze, but something inside him reveled in it. Finally he had his attention and his secret was out in the open. He didn't have to hide it anymore.
"So you're really gay?" Wufei asked finally. Duo nodded but Wufei paid little attention. He'd already sorted out the answers to the questions he's posed to himself earlier, but it didn't leave him feeling any better.
"I won't get in the way of you picking up girls," Duo said, his heart aching more with every syllable he uttered. "If you just tell me when you're going to bring them here I'll leave." /God, why does it have to hurt so much?/
To his great astonishment Wufei began to laugh.
"What?" Duo asked, slightly hurt by his reaction. "I'm trying to be considerate here."
"No, it's not that. It's just the way you said it. No, Maxwell, I have no interest in picking up girls. They don't do anything for me anymore than they do for you," he admitted, giving voice to something he'd known since he was fourteen, but never chosen to acknowledge.
Duo's mouth dropped open and he stared at him blankly. His ears had heard him, but his mind couldn't seem to wrap around the prospect. "You're. you?" Duo asked, unable to gather a coherent thought.
"Yes, me. I think one who's been married before would know their own preferences."
"Then, why didn't you say anything earlier?" Duo asked before he could stop himself.
"Duo, how long have you been in love with me?"
"Truly?" Duo asked, not understanding the sudden change of topic. "Since we were both captured by OZ and stuck in that damned cell. When they turned off the air I thought I was going to die. I tried talking to you, but when you put yourself into a state of suspended animation, I was so angry. But you know, I remember thinking just before I passed out, At least he'll live. Even if my death is meaningless, Wufei will live. I know it sounds stupid, but that's when I realized it."
"Oh," was all Wufei would say.
"That's all you have to say?" he demanded. "I bear my heart to you and all you can say is 'Oh'?"
"I'm not sure what to say right now. I didn't even realize I was. different until today."
"Will you at least think about what I've said?" Duo asked, hoping beyond hope that Wufei might actually have feelings for him.
"I will think about it. That's all I will promise."
~*~
Duo went back to school two days later, after having recovered from his cold. He still wasn't feeling up to par, but he figured he'd have a load of homework to do. The day was going just fine until four guys stepped out from a niche in the building, blocking his way.
"Can I help you?" Duo asked, unsure of what they wanted. He couldn't help but feel afraid. He wasn't all that strong because being sick zapped all his strength, and the guys standing in front of him were all in the body building class.
"So your gay?" the blond one asked, cutting right to the chase. Duo cursed silently inside, wondering which one of his friends he was going to hurt.
"What does it matter?" he asked cautiously.
"We don't appreciate fags at our schools. Especially fags who have nothing better to do than lead our girls on. We don't like you," he told him. "We're hoping that after we teach you a lesson, you'll withdraw from the school. Get him boys!"
Duo was helpless to stop what they were doing to him. They all swarmed him at once and beat him until he was bloody. It took all of his strength and all of his willpower just to get himself up and back to his room. He left his books lying on the grass.
***
When Wufei came into the room a few minutes later he found Duo lying on his bed crying. "What the hell's the matter with you?" he asked before he saw the mess he was in. "What happened?"
"I got the crap beat out of me, what do you think?" Duo sobbed. He hurt all over but he was sure that none of his bones were broken. The torture had been going on for almost a week and it didn't seem like his tormenters were in any mind to stop anytime soon.
Wufei went over to his closet and retrieved the bottle of peroxide and a wash cloth he kept there. Carefully he poured some of the liquid onto the rag and dabbed it on Duo's cuts. Duo winced and tried to ward him off, but Wufei was persistent.
"Just sit up so I can clean you up and then I'll leave you alone if you want me to," he told him gruffly. His voice was seething with anger that Duo knew was directed at him.
"You don't have to do this," he said aloud.
"I'm doing it because if I don't, those cuts will probably get infected. Now hold still. Who did this to you?"
Duo sniffed, suddenly aware of what he must look like. "I don't know who they were. They were some guys out of the body building class they teach here."
"I see. Why did they do this?"
"Because they found out that I'm gay."
"What?!" Wufei's hand, that he'd been so careful to keep steady, applied more pressure to one of the wounds than he meant it do, causing Duo to jump back. /I'll kill them,/ he thought. /I'll make them wish they were never borne. They'll pay for what they've done./ He realized just where his thoughts were going and stopped them in their tracks.
/Am I in love with Duo?!/
"So you're crying because they beat you up?" he asked, trying to understand his own feelings. The thought of him being in love with anyone scared him, made him want to run away.
"No, well that too, but it's the things they said."
"What did they say?" he asked, wondering just how deep his hurt went.
"It doesn't matter," Duo said, catching Wufei's hands in his own. Wufei looked into his eyes and felt an unfamiliar feeling take root in his heart. "Promise me you won't do anything? Not that you would, but promise me? I don't want them thinking that I can't take care of myself."
Wufei had to wrestle down the anger that flared just thinking about what must have happened, but forced himself to nod, albeit reluctantly. "I promise."
"Thank you," Duo said simply as he got up and went to the closet. He pulled out a can of wild yams and began to spread it on his bruises.
"What's that for?" Wufei asked as the pleasant cent assaulted his nose.
"It makes you heal faster," was all Duo would say.
~*~
Duo popped over to Quatre and Trowa's dorm room a couple hours later. He made sure to knock on the door first but even so, when he walked in he still caught Quatre and Trowa kissing on the couch.
"Er. sorry," Duo said sheepishly when the looked up at him.
"Oh, its okay, Duo," Quatre said brightly. "We weren't doing anything."
"Are you sure I'm not interrupting anything?" Duo asked, giving them ample opportunity to send him on his way. /And since when has Quatre ever done that? Even if he was just in the middle of foreplay he'll still stop what he's doing to talk to you!/
"No, we were just watching TV," Trowa said, indicating the movie that was on.
"Oh, okay. Quatre, do you have any time to talk?"
"Of course, Duo. Please excuse me Trowa," Quatre said as he got up off the couch and motioned for Duo to follow him into the bedroom. He closed the door quietly behind him and turned towards his friend. "What do you need to talk about?"
"It's still Wufei," Duo admitted.
"I thought as much," Quatre said, taking a set at the desk. "What exactly about him?"
"Well, you remember how those guys are kicking the crap out of me?" Duo asked, still embarrassed. He'd been lying on the ground when Quatre had accidentally walked in on the daily torture and put a stop to it.
/At least for that day. That got me even worse yesterday./ Duo winced at the memory. They were getting to brutal that it was getting hard for him to draw a breath without hurting.
"Yes," Quatre said angrily. He hated it when people had to gang up just to beat on one person. He didn't mind fair fights so much, but there was no honor in what these men were doing.
"Well, 'Fei found out about it today," Duo said.
"And how did he react?" Quatre asked quickly, afraid his friend would do something drastic.
"He seemed really angry, but I made him promise not to do anything." /Not that he would anyway./
"That's probably for the best," Quatre said. "Knowing Wufei he'd beat them within an inch of their lives. Actually, that's what I'd like to do to them. See how they like getting attacked for once."
"It's not worth it," Duo said hastily, not wanting his friend to get hurt. "I was just wondering. When 'Fei came into the dorm and found me, he patched me up. I mean, I didn't even ask him. He just came in, saw me, and did it. Do you think it means anything?"
Quatre looked into his friend's eyes and sighed. Wufei hadn't said anything to Duo about their discussion and he knew it was driving Duo to distraction. Duo had told him about Wufei admitting he was gay also, but Quatre hadn't seen it as any more than that.
"I really couldn't tell you, Duo. He's been avoiding being around you of late, so I don't know how he acts around you. I think he's not exactly sure how to act. To me it seems to me like its still up in the air about whether he'll ever return your affection or not. You'll just have to wait and see."
Duo's face fell and he nodded slightly. "Yeah, I guess you're right Q. I'm probably just getting my hopes up anyway." /Damn, why couldn't Quatre have been borne psychic?!/
"I'm sorry I couldn't be much help," Quatre said as Duo stood to leave.
"It's okay, Q. I'll wait as long as it takes for him to make up his mind."
~*~
A week later Wufei was still unsure of how to act around Duo. He'd come to the conclusion that he was, in fact, in love with the other boy, but he didn't want to admit it. The thought scared him more than anything else in the world could have. What made it worse was watching his friend silently bear the ridicule of the people he passed by. The looks, the jeers, the hurled stones. All of it made his blood boil.
"So what are you going to do?" Quatre asked him, bringing his wandering thoughts back to earth.
"I'm not sure. There's not a lot that I can do. I gave him my word that I wouldn't interfere, but I can't stand watching him. It's like part of him is dying, Quatre," he complained. He'd arranged to meet his friend after school in a secluded place to talk alone with him.
"Part of his is dying and it is partly your fault. You gave him hope that you might return his affection, especially after the first time when you cleaned him up, but now you're doing everything you can to avoid him. Add onto that all the crap he's putting up with, and his life is a living hell. If you're really in love with him, Wufei, you'd better do something soon. You may loose your chance."
"What?!" he yelped.
"Wufei, most people may find you hard to read, but to me your transparent. Don't try to hide it."
"Okay, fine. Do you know what the worst thing about it is thought?" he asked, his voice filling with irony.
"What?"
"I'm the reason Duo's putting up with this crap and I can't stand it. I hate hearing them say that Duo's a piece of crap because he's a fag," he said letting all of his anger boil away. A car honked loudly in the parking lot, causing them both to look. Duo was standing there looking at them, his expression one of complete shock and horror. Then he ran.
"Duo!" Wufei yelled. He started after him but the car that Duo'd stepped in front of got in the way.
"Go after him," Quatre told him urgently.
"Where would he go?" Wufei asked, a certain calm descending upon him.
"I'm not sure."
***
"Duo's a piece of crap because he's a fag," Duo heard Wufei say. He accidentally stepped out in front of a car, causing it to beep its horn loudly. Wufei called to him as he started to run, but he didn't listen. The only thing he could think of was getting away.
/I trusted him! I loved him and I trusted him!/ his mind screamed. He wasn't conscious of where he was going, but soon he found himself inside his own dorm. /I can't stand it. I won't stand it. If I can't have Wufei, I won't have anyone at all./
His mind was clouded and his heart in turmoil as he pulled out the knife he kept hidden in his closet. Normally he would never even entertain such a thought, but he'd just received the biggest shock of his life and he wanted to end it before the numbness wore off.
Quickly he scribbled a note down on a piece of paper before he drew the knife across his wrists.
~*~
Heero found him a while later, lying in the middle of the floor. His eyes were clouded and he didn't respond to anything that was said. Quickly his friend ran from the room and called an ambulance. Duo heard it coming through the fog that encircled his thoughts and prayed that they would be too late.
***
Heero read the note and shuddered as he waited for the doctors to give them an update on their friend.
[I wish things could have turned out differently, Wufei. I really did love you. I'm sorry that I was such a bother that you didn't feel you could ridicule me to my face like you used to. Next time you want a boyfriend, try not cutting their heart out before you get around to telling them anything. I hope you're happy. I'm out of your life now, just like you wanted.]
"What did he say to him?" Heero demanded of Quatre. Wufei was still absent, but on his way to the hospital. Quatre quickly explained about Duo catching the tail end of something that had been said and his obvious jump to conclusions.
"It figures," Heero muttered. "Nothing those two do is ever simple."
***
When Duo woke up he was in a white room, with white curtains, and a white bedspread. "Am I dead yet?" he asked, looking around. He caught sight of his friends and let out a moan of despair.
"Duo, its okay. You're in the hospital," Quatre tried to explain, letting go of Trowa's hand. Nothing he did seemed to do anything to help his friend.
/Why? Why did they keep me alive? I wanted to die./
"You have to let us explain," Quatre said desperately, his voice taking on an edge.
"What is there to explain?" Duo snapped. "I heard what you and 'Fei were talking about. I'm not so stupid that I can't add two and two and come up with four."
"Duo!" Wufei cried, bursting into the room. "God, don't ever do something like that again! You had me worried sick! I swear, if you had died I would have killed you myself!" he yelled, fear showing in his eyes. The rest of the g-boys felt it would be better if they were alone and left discreetly.
"Why should it matter to you? It's not like you care," Duo said brokenly.
"You've got it all wrong," Wufei said, and proceeded to explain everything. "I was afraid of my feelings for you, and I was talking to Quatre about it. I was complaining about what other people were saying about you," he finished a short time later.
Duo said nothing, just looked into his eyes for a long drawn out moment. "I'm sorry," he said, breaking the heavy silence. "I just wanted so desperately to die right then."
"I know," Wufei said, touching his side. Duo cried out in pain and he quickly drew his hand back. Against Duo's protests he pulled the covers back, exposing Duo's chest. Dark bruises were scattered all over what parts of his body were visible. "I'll kill them," Wufei swore, anger coursing though him like it never had before.
"No, forget about it," Duo said.
"But Duo," he started to say, but the smile that broke out oh his love's face stopped him.
"You know, that's the first time you have ever said my name."
"Duo?" Wufei asked. He tried to think of a single other time before that he'd used it, but was unable to. "You're right."
"Promise me you still won't do anything that will get you kicked out of college?" Duo pleaded.
"But what if-,"
"Shh. Wufei, as long as you're near me, that's enough to keep me happy. Besides," he said, a mischievous glint coming to his eyes. "If it gets too rough I'll let you protect me."
Wufei smiled in spite of himself, glad to have the old Duo back. "Believe me, I'll be there if you need me," he said, before he bent his head and sealed the promise with a passionate kiss.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
Dream Keeper: Okay, they may have gotten a little OOC in the end, but we did good at the beginning, right?
Christa: We know it's not very good, but it _was_ a challenge fic you know. Please R&R which means read AND REVIEW and tell us that you liked.
Dream Keeper: Or didn't. Okay, bedtime. Night!
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Dream Maker: Well folks, standard yada. I do not own Gundam Wing. *sniffs* I wish I did but I don't. The G-boys and girls belong to their respectable owners. I am just using them for this twisted fic. I promise to return them, only slightly worse for the wear when we're through with them. Um.. Anything else?
Christa: Normally we would NEVER work with this pairing but a friend issued us a challenge fic and we can't turn that down without tarnishing our honor as writers. *sigh* The only g-boy pairing we approve of is the 3x4 pairing.. Yaio fic, 2x5 pairing. A little bit of near death and that kind of stuff. nothing major.
Dream Keeper: Don't hurt us if you don't like the pairing. Just go away. Other than that, this is a one shot, so enjoy!
"blah" - speech (duh!)
/blah/ -- personal thoughts
[Blah] - writing
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
Wufei woke to a loud buzzing in his ear. He looked at the alarm clock next to his bed and sighed. Yet another day of school that he didn't want to endure. It was bad enough that he was attending a preppy college, but on top of all that he had the worst roommate.
"Wufei, it's too damn early, shut that piece of shit off," his roommate called as he lobbed a pillow at him.
"It's five thirty, you should get up," he advised his lazy partner. All he received in reply was a very rude hand gesture. "Suit yourself," he replied as he got up to take a shower. As he passed by his desk he vaguely noted that he hadn't finished all of his assigned work the night before. /Yet another thing to do this morning./
With a sigh Wufei gathered his clothes and headed towards the common bathroom down the hall. If there was one thing he hated about colleges it was the common bathrooms. The only thing good about it was you didn't have to clean them yourself. /How did I end up here?/ he wondered as he stripped out of his clothes and turned on the water. /Why did I have to get stuck with Maxwell as a roommate?/
Wufei remembered the day very well that he'd gotten the news of just who he was going to be rooming with for the year. He'd been sitting outside on the porch swing at the g-boys' house when he'd gotten the letter. They'd all been accepted into one of the most prestigious schools on the continent, thanks to Quatre and a little computer hacking, but no one was excited about more schooling.
/I'm going to be a Preventer so I don't know why I'm even here./
He'd opened the letter to see exactly what books he need to pick up, but when he'd read the notice about room arrangements being final he'd blown a gasket. Amazingly enough, Duo had had the same reaction.
/It's about the only time the braided onna and I have ever agreed on anything./ All of a sudden the water turned ice cold, shattering Wufei's musings and making him leap out of the shower. "Damn!" he cursed, wanting to vent his anger somehow. Reluctantly accepting defeat, yet again from the shower, he toweled off and got dressed.
When he entered his room the clock on his nightstand read six o'clock and Duo was still asleep. With a shrug, Wufei sat down at his desk and tried to complete his work before his first class. At seven, fifteen minutes before their shared English class, Wufei got tired of waiting on the lazy lump and went and got a pitcher of ice water. He noticed it felt particularly good upending it over Duo's bed.
"DAMN! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!" Duo screamed as he leaped out of bed.
"Fifteen until class," Wufei said, leaving the room.
***
Duo watched Wufei leave and growled in frustration. After being in the same dorm with him for the past few months he still wasn't feeling any differently. He'd thought that, since Wufei was always such an asshole to him, he'd get over his crush.
/I wish. All that's happened is its gotten worse. Thank god he doesn't change in here or I'd probably loose it./ Duo thought as he unbraided his messy hair and started to brush it out. With its length reaching almost down to his knees when it was unbraided, it was his pride and joy. /I think it's the only thing in this world I can care about more than his royal grumpiness./
"Duo, are you coming or what?" Wufei asked through the door as he was rummaging around in his drawers for something to wear.
"Yeah, I'm comin'. Hold your horses!" Duo shot back, not having to act to color his voice with annoyance. /Will he ever understand?/
***
"If that braided idiot doesn't hurry up, I'm going to leave without him," Wufei swore to himself. He was already almost late for class and he didn't want any extra homework tonight. Finally, two minutes before class started, Duo finally immerged. "It's about time!" Wufei growled as he started towards the door.
"You know, you don't have to wait on me," Duo reminded him. "And you could have woken me up a little nicer this morning."
"I did, but you didn't choose to get up," Wufei shot back tartly.
"It was five freaking thirty in the morning! What sane person would be up then?"
"Anyone who wants at least a luke-warm shower," Wufei grumbled. Any later and the girls would use all the hot water, and you'd be stuck with water so cold it'd shrivel your dick.
"That's why you learn to take your showers at night!" Duo said as they arrived at their class. Just as they took their seats the bell rang. Both of the young men let out a sigh of relief and prepared themselves for another boring lesson.
~*~
Later that day, during lunch, Duo thought back over the mornings events and decided to go to the store. It took him a while to track Wufei down, but in the end he managed. "Hey, Wufei, could you lend me your car for a few minutes?" Duo asked him. He put on his most charming smile, but his friend seemed unaffected.
"Go find someone else who's crazy enough to trust their wheels to you. You're S.O.L. with me," Wufei said as he stalked off. (SOL== Shit outta luck!)
"Sheesh, what's eating him?" Duo asked, turning back to the rest of the boys.
"Don't know. I'd guess he's still mad about whatever you did this morning," Heero told him.
"But I didn't do anything!"
"Evidently then, its something you didn't do," Trowa said.
Duo resigned himself to the fact that his friends would never side with him in an argument between him and Wufei. They didn't think he was responsible enough to do anything Wufei accused him of _not_ doing. "Fine, will one of you let me borrow your car?"
"Sorry," Trowa said as he stood to leave. "Mine's in the shop."
Heero followed his lead and called back over his shoulder, "Relena took mine to go to lunch. Sorry."
"Sorry my foot," Duo muttered as he headed back to the dorm to get his books for his next class.
~*~
"Just a couple of miles down the road, but will anyone give me a ride? No!" Duo grumbled as he walked down the side of the road towards Jack's Store. Three miles seemed like a long ways on foot when it was starting to rain. "Man, I hope it doesn't start pouring before I get back to the dorm. Please, just let me get back first," Duo pleaded with the weather.
Evidently it had other plans because just as he reached the store the skies opened up and started dropping water in sheets. Duo looked outside and felt his resolve not to get angry at his friends crumble. As quickly as he could he bought his alarm clock and went back out into the storm. He kept his pace at a jog the whole way back to the campus, but even at that, by the time he got there he was soaked and chilled to the bone.
"Where have you been, Maxwell?" Wufei asked, barely looking up from his work when Duo came dripping into the room. "You look like hell."
"Well thank you for that observation, Wufei! I wouldn't have known that if you hadn't told me! I'm so glad I have someone like you to tell me things that anyone with an ounce of sense could observe!" Duo shouted as he headed for their shared bedroom.
"God, what's eating you?" Wufei snapped, his mood turning sour.
"I don't know, maybe the fact that I asked you to lend me your car for five minutes so I could go to the store and buy a damned alarm clock but no! You thought I wasn't responsible enough so now I'm soaked, I'm cold, and I'm in a bad mood. Shut up and deal with it!" he fumed, wanting nothing more than to pound some sense into the head of the person he loved.
"It's your own fault that you've earned the title of irresponsible," Wufei snapped as he gathered his books, got up, and left.
/Maybe it is my own fault, but at least I'm _trying_ to change./ Duo thought back to all the things he'd been doing over the past few months. He'd stopped blowing all his money on useless junk, he'd stopped going to parties for the most part, he studied, he maintained a B average, he completed almost all of his homework, and now he'd gotten an alarm clock so Wufei wouldn't have to wait on him anymore.
/They could at least acknowledge the fact that I'm trying./ he thought as he changed out of his wet clothes and crawled into bed to get warm before he did his homework.
***
Wufei stalked down the hall to Heero and Trowa's room and knocked on the door. Trowa answered it and beckoned for him to come in.
"What's he done this time?" Heero asked the second he walked into the room.
"Maxwell's just being his normal irresponsible self and blaming everyone else for his problems," Wufei fumed as he remembered their exchange or words. For some reason that he couldn't fathom, he was actually slightly hurt by what his friend had said.
"You have to admit," Quatre said from the couch, "He has been trying to shape up his act. His grades reflect it and he's starting to become more considerate of others too. He told me he was getting an alarm clock so you wouldn't have to wait on him in the mornings anymore."
Wufei plopped himself down on the floor and said nothing. /Maybe I am being too hard on the braided idiot. What am I saying? It's Maxwell we're talking about here!/
"Hey, does anyone understand how to do the Advanced Trig. problems?" Trowa asked as he poured over his math book.
"Sure, I'll help you," Heero said. The four friends passed the rest of the night in near silence, only broken if one of them needed help. Normally Duo would be there, jabbering away as he worked, but tonight he was in his room sulking, or so his friends thought.
~*~
Wufei's alarm clock went off at the same time the next morning that it had every morning for the past few months. He waited a moment for Duo's customary hurl of insults, but for once it never came. Not thinking much of it, Wufei shrugged and went off to shower. When he came back her sat down on his bed and read for a long time.
At six thirty his alarm went off again and he reached over to shut it off, only to realize that it wasn't his alarm going off. It was Duo's. /Oh, and I thought he was lying about getting the alarm. Guess I shouldn't have gotten so mad last night./
"Hey, Duo, you going to turn that thing off or what?" Only a muffled moan answered him. Wufei, who was getting tired of the sound by then, walked over and shut the thing off. "You know, if you're going to own the thing, it might help if you use it too," he snapped. Again he waited for Duo to retaliate, but his friend didn't move.
One glance around the room showed him that Duo's books were still in the same place this morning as they'd been when he'd left the night before. His pajama's were still lying across the back of his chair, and no clothes littered the floor. "Duo?" Wufei asked as he flipped on Duo's beside lamp and leaned down to look at his friend's face.
Duo's face was pale, almost as pale as his sheets, but his cheeks were flushed with fever. When Wufei gingerly touched his forehead he pulled his hand back from the heat he felt there. Quickly he left the dorm room to tell his friends he wouldn't be in class. Then he brought an extra blanket and some cold medicine he'd borrowed from the others into the room.
"Duo," he said, keeping his voice soft in case his friend had a headache.
"What?" Duo managed to mutter. He was freezing and wanted nothing more than to huddle down under his blankets and sleep.
"You have a really bad cold and you need to take a dose of this crap," Wufei said to him. He managed to get his friend to take the medicine and drink some water before he let him fall back asleep. Only then did it occur to him to take his temperature.
/How did my mother do it when I wouldn't open my mouth?/ He wrinkled his nose in disgust when he remembered that she'd stick it under his arm, but decided that he could disinfect the thermometer later.
101.3 the thermometer read a few minutes later when he checked it. At the same time, Duo turned over in his sleep, causing his blankets to slip off of him. Wufei noticed that all down his side was soaked, though he couldn't imagine what from.
/Wait, didn't I pour water in his bed yesterday?/ Wufei silently cursed himself for being so stupid as not to remember before. /Now I wish one of the other guys was here to help me./
"Hey Duo," Wufei said, gently shaking his friend. "Duo, wake up."
Duo groaned and muttered, "Just let me sleep. Go to class."
Wufei sighed and reigned in his temper, remembering to have patience. "Your fever is too high for me to leave right now, and I'm broke so I can't call a doctor. I need you to at least wake up enough to hold yourself up."
Duo's eyes cracked open and he looked at his friend for a moment before heaving himself into a sitting position. He tried to stand but his legs would cooperate and he sat heavily back down on the bed.
"Get your shirt off," Wufei commanded.
"What?" Duo asked, surprised even through the fog his fever had him in.
"Your wet because of the water I poured over you yesterday morning and I need you out of those wet clothes," Wufei explained patiently. Duo nodded dumbly and stripped out of his shirt. He then let his friend help him to stand and get him to the other bed.
"Why-,"
"Your bed is wet Duo. You need to be dry," Wufei said again. /This is going to be a real test of my patience./ he thought as he started to devoid Duo of his pants. He thought about leaving him in his underwear but decided against it, much to his dismay.
/Knowing Duo he'd just get sicker, just to torture me. I hope he doesn't get the flue./ A little corner of his mind marveled that he cared, while his logical side passed it off as not wanting to smell puke while he slept from now on.
Duo, who's head was growing fuzzier by the moment, barely realized Wufei was striping him until he felt _all_ his bare skin touch the warm, dry sheets of Wufei's bed. Against his will his body reacted to the oh-so- wanted sensation.
"What the hell, Maxwell?" Wufei asked and Duo hastily pulled the covers over himself.
"It's not exactly something I can control," Duo muttered as he turned over to face the wall, pulling the covers up to his chin.
"What do you mean by that?" Wufei asked, perplexed.
"I'm gay, all right Wufei? Now do you want to go to class instead of taking care of me?" /God, why today? Why couldn't I tell him when I can stand up for myself when he ridicules me?/
"No, I already told you that I couldn't leave you. Do you have a blowdryer?"
"Dresser," Duo muttered still waiting to be made fun of, laughed at by the object of his affection.
***
/He's gay? He's really gay?/ Wufei thought as he unbraided Duo's hair, brushed it out, and started drying it. It felt satiny smooth in his hands and induced reactions in him that he'd never expected before. Roughly he pushed the feelings away, intent upon ignoring them until he had time to examine them.
"What're you doin this for?" Do asked, his words slightly slurred together from exhaustion.
"Because if you died, our friends would never forgive me," Wufei replied curtly.
"Oh, sound like you care," Duo muttered as he fell back to sleep, enjoying the sensation of his friend playing with his hair.
/He really shouldn't trust me like this. How many times have I threatened to cut his braid off?/ Wufei wondered but immediately dismissed the idea. For some reason, he just didn't want to see Duo without his signature braid.
/Why'd he tell me he was gay, anyway? If he's so embarrassed about it he could have at least told me that he hadn't gotten any in a while and was hallucinating about a girl./
Wufei thought back to the one time _he'd_ had to sleep with is wife and shuddered. He'd woken up the next morning feeling dirty and disgusted. When his friends asked him about it, he'd had to tell them many lies to keep them from suspecting he was different. Meilan had been the only one who'd ever known the truth about how he really felt.
/What does this mean? I've never like girls much. Does this mean.?/ Wufei shoved the thought away roughly and finished taking care of his friend. When he was done he stripped Duo's bed and propped the mattress up against a wall so it would dry before he sat back to study. He had a major test coming up and he wanted to be as prepared for it as he could.
/Of course this means I'll have double the work tomorrow. Couldn't he at least have had the decency to get sick on a weekend?/
~*~
"Hey, 'Fei, could I have some water?" Duo asked hours later after Wufei took his temperature. Wufei looked at the clock on the wall and discovered it was nearly two in the afternoon.
"Sure." The rest of the guys had been by at lunch to check on their sick comrade, but they'd had classes to get back to. "But you'll have to take more of this cold medicine. It's been over six hours."
"Sure," Duo said, his words muffled by his pillow. Wufei left the room and returned a few minutes later bearing water and a bowl of chicken noodle soup.
"Wake up," he said, setting the tray down beside the bed. "You need to eat something or all this will be for nothing. You usually eat like a horse so this can't be good for you." He settled down at his desk and watched as his friend brushed away the last wisps of the fog of sleep and sat up.
"Thank you so much Wufei," he snapped, glaring across the room at him. "Are you going to insult everything else about me to? What, am I too girlish for your taste? Does your skin crawl from being in the same room as a gay guy? Do you hate the fact that I actually have a sense or humor? Go on, say what you wan, since you seem so intent upon insulting _everything_ I do."
Wufei just sat there, staring dumbly at him. He'd only meant his comment as a joke, but Duo had clearly taken it entirely the wrong way.
"God, I didn't mean anything by it Maxwell. I just meant that you usually consume a hell of a lot more than you have today and you need to eat something. It was just a joke." Wufei shot back tartly. "What is your problem?"
"It should be kind of obvious, but if you don't understand then never mind," Duo said moodily as he picked at his food.
/What the hell is up with him? I'm not acting any different than normal, so why is he acting this way?/
***
/Why can't he just understand?/
"Spit it out, Maxwell," Wufei said, folding his arms over his chest. "You've started the conversation, now finish it."
"Fine," Duo said, his anger boiling over. "I'm tired of you insulting me every chance you get. It may seem like a big joke to you, but did you ever stop to think that maybe it does hurt? Its not bad enough that you're always calling me a woman, but last week you were insulting me because." he choked. "Because I'm not only a bastard, but an orphaned one. And you're always saying crap about the way I dress, or eat, or act, and I'm tired of it! I have feelings too and I'm tired of having them walked all over.
"I appreciate what you've done for me today, but I can't help but be angry with you. I've tried to change, become more responsible, but nothing I can do seems to have any affect on you. You don't give me a shred of respect and I'm tired of it!" he finished, raising his voice to make a point.
/Why doesn't he just understand? Why must he always be so cruel to me? Am I just never meant to have true happiness? Am I cursed to always have the people I love leave me?/
"I'm sorry, Maxwell. I hadn't realized you felt that way," Wufei said, a small amount of guilt creeping into his voice. He hadn't realized that much of what he said to him was derogatory.
"It's fine, just forget I ever said anything," Duo said flatly. He set his empty soup bowl aside, took a swig of water and lay back down.
Wufei looked at the clock on the wall and contemplated what to do next. "Can you stay by yourself for a little while?" he asked, wondering if he should leave Duo alone.
"I've been alone most of my life. Half an hour won't kill me," he said bitterly.
"Okay, see you in a few." Wufei got up and left silently.
Duo waited until the door was shut before giving into silent tears. /He doesn't even realize. Will he ever? Will he ever understand how much I love him?/
***
/What the hell is eating him? He's been acting so strangely since he told me he's gay./ Wufei pondered the question as he waited for his friends to get out of their classes. He was waiting near on of the benches right outside the school, across the campus from the dorms. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the bell rang.
"Hey, Wufei!" Quatre called as he walked towards him. Wufei lifted his hand in greeting, but didn't acknowledge his friend otherwise. He was still pondering Duo's weird attitude.
"What's up? Duo do something else to piss you off?" Heero asked.
"No, actually, he hasn't today. He's been a pain, but I'll let him slide because he's sick," Wufei answered, falling into the familiar pattern of their conversations.
"So how's he doing?" Trowa asked.
"Better. His temp's down to 99.5, and he's looking a lot more alert, but I think he's still going to miss class tomorrow. If he tries it, I will tie him up and handcuff him to his bed."
"Be careful Wufei," Quatre joked. "You're actually sounding like you're starting to care." His smile faded when he caught the look on his friends' face. "What's up?"
"Has Duo said anything to you guys about me insulting him?" he asked. All three of his friends became noticeably uncomfortable.
"He has complained about it a time or two," Trowa said carefully. Wufei noticed that he was being very careful about the way he phrased him comment.
"I have a feeling there's more to this than your telling me," he accused them.
"It's really not our place," Quatre began.
"For what? Duo complains all the time," Heero said, as in the dark as Wufei.
"Not your place to tell me that Duo's gay?" Wufei asked, watching his friends face closely. Quatre colored and nodded slightly.
"Duo's gay?" Heero said, louder than he meant to because a few heads in the courtyard swung around. Trowa punched him roughly, causing the perfect soldier to wince.
"Nice going, Heero. He didn't want the whole damn school to know!" he admonished.
"Yes, that wasn't our place to tell you," Quatre said, again phrasing his sentences very carefully.
"Just what are you tip-toeing around?" Wufei asked, noticing the Arab's discomfort.
"Well, Duo is, er. well." Trowa started to say, trying to find the right words to explain.
"Its pretty obvious to anyone, well, to us at least," Quatre said, indicating himself and Trowa, "That Duo is completely and totally smitten with you."
Wufei blinked in surprise. That would explain so much about what had happened today. But were they really correct?
"He's in love with me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
Trowa nodded. "Anyone could tell by the way he looks at you. I remember catching a few looks like that from Quatre before we got together." He smiled slightly at his life partner. They had been very careful to keep their relationship discreet because of all the problems it could cause where they were. Wufei nodded, his eyes betraying that his mind was elsewhere.
"Don't you dare lead him on," Quatre said, suddenly feeling fiercely protective. "I will personally skin you alive if you do something like that to him. Oh, don't look at me like that. I know you're perfectly capable of doing just that, but I'm not sure if you would."
"Quatre, I may be a 'psychopathic asshole who rants about justice all day', but that is lower than I would ever sink, thank you," Wufei said, quoting the exact words Duo had said to him months back. "Anyway, I gotta get back."
"See ya," the guy's said as they moved to go to their final classes.
/That explains so much about him./ Wufei thought as he watched his friends go. /He's always acted funny around us, especially me of late. No wonder he asked me not to change in the room when we first got assigned together. He wanted to keep it a secret./
***
When Wufei entered the dorm, Duo was lying where he'd left him, half- asleep. His eyes opened when he entered the room, but he said nothing, opting to let his friend sort things out. Undoubtedly he would have talked to Quatre already.
Wufei took a seat at his desk, and looked at Duo for the longest time. Duo had to resist the urge to squirm under his piercing gaze, but something inside him reveled in it. Finally he had his attention and his secret was out in the open. He didn't have to hide it anymore.
"So you're really gay?" Wufei asked finally. Duo nodded but Wufei paid little attention. He'd already sorted out the answers to the questions he's posed to himself earlier, but it didn't leave him feeling any better.
"I won't get in the way of you picking up girls," Duo said, his heart aching more with every syllable he uttered. "If you just tell me when you're going to bring them here I'll leave." /God, why does it have to hurt so much?/
To his great astonishment Wufei began to laugh.
"What?" Duo asked, slightly hurt by his reaction. "I'm trying to be considerate here."
"No, it's not that. It's just the way you said it. No, Maxwell, I have no interest in picking up girls. They don't do anything for me anymore than they do for you," he admitted, giving voice to something he'd known since he was fourteen, but never chosen to acknowledge.
Duo's mouth dropped open and he stared at him blankly. His ears had heard him, but his mind couldn't seem to wrap around the prospect. "You're. you?" Duo asked, unable to gather a coherent thought.
"Yes, me. I think one who's been married before would know their own preferences."
"Then, why didn't you say anything earlier?" Duo asked before he could stop himself.
"Duo, how long have you been in love with me?"
"Truly?" Duo asked, not understanding the sudden change of topic. "Since we were both captured by OZ and stuck in that damned cell. When they turned off the air I thought I was going to die. I tried talking to you, but when you put yourself into a state of suspended animation, I was so angry. But you know, I remember thinking just before I passed out, At least he'll live. Even if my death is meaningless, Wufei will live. I know it sounds stupid, but that's when I realized it."
"Oh," was all Wufei would say.
"That's all you have to say?" he demanded. "I bear my heart to you and all you can say is 'Oh'?"
"I'm not sure what to say right now. I didn't even realize I was. different until today."
"Will you at least think about what I've said?" Duo asked, hoping beyond hope that Wufei might actually have feelings for him.
"I will think about it. That's all I will promise."
~*~
Duo went back to school two days later, after having recovered from his cold. He still wasn't feeling up to par, but he figured he'd have a load of homework to do. The day was going just fine until four guys stepped out from a niche in the building, blocking his way.
"Can I help you?" Duo asked, unsure of what they wanted. He couldn't help but feel afraid. He wasn't all that strong because being sick zapped all his strength, and the guys standing in front of him were all in the body building class.
"So your gay?" the blond one asked, cutting right to the chase. Duo cursed silently inside, wondering which one of his friends he was going to hurt.
"What does it matter?" he asked cautiously.
"We don't appreciate fags at our schools. Especially fags who have nothing better to do than lead our girls on. We don't like you," he told him. "We're hoping that after we teach you a lesson, you'll withdraw from the school. Get him boys!"
Duo was helpless to stop what they were doing to him. They all swarmed him at once and beat him until he was bloody. It took all of his strength and all of his willpower just to get himself up and back to his room. He left his books lying on the grass.
***
When Wufei came into the room a few minutes later he found Duo lying on his bed crying. "What the hell's the matter with you?" he asked before he saw the mess he was in. "What happened?"
"I got the crap beat out of me, what do you think?" Duo sobbed. He hurt all over but he was sure that none of his bones were broken. The torture had been going on for almost a week and it didn't seem like his tormenters were in any mind to stop anytime soon.
Wufei went over to his closet and retrieved the bottle of peroxide and a wash cloth he kept there. Carefully he poured some of the liquid onto the rag and dabbed it on Duo's cuts. Duo winced and tried to ward him off, but Wufei was persistent.
"Just sit up so I can clean you up and then I'll leave you alone if you want me to," he told him gruffly. His voice was seething with anger that Duo knew was directed at him.
"You don't have to do this," he said aloud.
"I'm doing it because if I don't, those cuts will probably get infected. Now hold still. Who did this to you?"
Duo sniffed, suddenly aware of what he must look like. "I don't know who they were. They were some guys out of the body building class they teach here."
"I see. Why did they do this?"
"Because they found out that I'm gay."
"What?!" Wufei's hand, that he'd been so careful to keep steady, applied more pressure to one of the wounds than he meant it do, causing Duo to jump back. /I'll kill them,/ he thought. /I'll make them wish they were never borne. They'll pay for what they've done./ He realized just where his thoughts were going and stopped them in their tracks.
/Am I in love with Duo?!/
"So you're crying because they beat you up?" he asked, trying to understand his own feelings. The thought of him being in love with anyone scared him, made him want to run away.
"No, well that too, but it's the things they said."
"What did they say?" he asked, wondering just how deep his hurt went.
"It doesn't matter," Duo said, catching Wufei's hands in his own. Wufei looked into his eyes and felt an unfamiliar feeling take root in his heart. "Promise me you won't do anything? Not that you would, but promise me? I don't want them thinking that I can't take care of myself."
Wufei had to wrestle down the anger that flared just thinking about what must have happened, but forced himself to nod, albeit reluctantly. "I promise."
"Thank you," Duo said simply as he got up and went to the closet. He pulled out a can of wild yams and began to spread it on his bruises.
"What's that for?" Wufei asked as the pleasant cent assaulted his nose.
"It makes you heal faster," was all Duo would say.
~*~
Duo popped over to Quatre and Trowa's dorm room a couple hours later. He made sure to knock on the door first but even so, when he walked in he still caught Quatre and Trowa kissing on the couch.
"Er. sorry," Duo said sheepishly when the looked up at him.
"Oh, its okay, Duo," Quatre said brightly. "We weren't doing anything."
"Are you sure I'm not interrupting anything?" Duo asked, giving them ample opportunity to send him on his way. /And since when has Quatre ever done that? Even if he was just in the middle of foreplay he'll still stop what he's doing to talk to you!/
"No, we were just watching TV," Trowa said, indicating the movie that was on.
"Oh, okay. Quatre, do you have any time to talk?"
"Of course, Duo. Please excuse me Trowa," Quatre said as he got up off the couch and motioned for Duo to follow him into the bedroom. He closed the door quietly behind him and turned towards his friend. "What do you need to talk about?"
"It's still Wufei," Duo admitted.
"I thought as much," Quatre said, taking a set at the desk. "What exactly about him?"
"Well, you remember how those guys are kicking the crap out of me?" Duo asked, still embarrassed. He'd been lying on the ground when Quatre had accidentally walked in on the daily torture and put a stop to it.
/At least for that day. That got me even worse yesterday./ Duo winced at the memory. They were getting to brutal that it was getting hard for him to draw a breath without hurting.
"Yes," Quatre said angrily. He hated it when people had to gang up just to beat on one person. He didn't mind fair fights so much, but there was no honor in what these men were doing.
"Well, 'Fei found out about it today," Duo said.
"And how did he react?" Quatre asked quickly, afraid his friend would do something drastic.
"He seemed really angry, but I made him promise not to do anything." /Not that he would anyway./
"That's probably for the best," Quatre said. "Knowing Wufei he'd beat them within an inch of their lives. Actually, that's what I'd like to do to them. See how they like getting attacked for once."
"It's not worth it," Duo said hastily, not wanting his friend to get hurt. "I was just wondering. When 'Fei came into the dorm and found me, he patched me up. I mean, I didn't even ask him. He just came in, saw me, and did it. Do you think it means anything?"
Quatre looked into his friend's eyes and sighed. Wufei hadn't said anything to Duo about their discussion and he knew it was driving Duo to distraction. Duo had told him about Wufei admitting he was gay also, but Quatre hadn't seen it as any more than that.
"I really couldn't tell you, Duo. He's been avoiding being around you of late, so I don't know how he acts around you. I think he's not exactly sure how to act. To me it seems to me like its still up in the air about whether he'll ever return your affection or not. You'll just have to wait and see."
Duo's face fell and he nodded slightly. "Yeah, I guess you're right Q. I'm probably just getting my hopes up anyway." /Damn, why couldn't Quatre have been borne psychic?!/
"I'm sorry I couldn't be much help," Quatre said as Duo stood to leave.
"It's okay, Q. I'll wait as long as it takes for him to make up his mind."
~*~
A week later Wufei was still unsure of how to act around Duo. He'd come to the conclusion that he was, in fact, in love with the other boy, but he didn't want to admit it. The thought scared him more than anything else in the world could have. What made it worse was watching his friend silently bear the ridicule of the people he passed by. The looks, the jeers, the hurled stones. All of it made his blood boil.
"So what are you going to do?" Quatre asked him, bringing his wandering thoughts back to earth.
"I'm not sure. There's not a lot that I can do. I gave him my word that I wouldn't interfere, but I can't stand watching him. It's like part of him is dying, Quatre," he complained. He'd arranged to meet his friend after school in a secluded place to talk alone with him.
"Part of his is dying and it is partly your fault. You gave him hope that you might return his affection, especially after the first time when you cleaned him up, but now you're doing everything you can to avoid him. Add onto that all the crap he's putting up with, and his life is a living hell. If you're really in love with him, Wufei, you'd better do something soon. You may loose your chance."
"What?!" he yelped.
"Wufei, most people may find you hard to read, but to me your transparent. Don't try to hide it."
"Okay, fine. Do you know what the worst thing about it is thought?" he asked, his voice filling with irony.
"What?"
"I'm the reason Duo's putting up with this crap and I can't stand it. I hate hearing them say that Duo's a piece of crap because he's a fag," he said letting all of his anger boil away. A car honked loudly in the parking lot, causing them both to look. Duo was standing there looking at them, his expression one of complete shock and horror. Then he ran.
"Duo!" Wufei yelled. He started after him but the car that Duo'd stepped in front of got in the way.
"Go after him," Quatre told him urgently.
"Where would he go?" Wufei asked, a certain calm descending upon him.
"I'm not sure."
***
"Duo's a piece of crap because he's a fag," Duo heard Wufei say. He accidentally stepped out in front of a car, causing it to beep its horn loudly. Wufei called to him as he started to run, but he didn't listen. The only thing he could think of was getting away.
/I trusted him! I loved him and I trusted him!/ his mind screamed. He wasn't conscious of where he was going, but soon he found himself inside his own dorm. /I can't stand it. I won't stand it. If I can't have Wufei, I won't have anyone at all./
His mind was clouded and his heart in turmoil as he pulled out the knife he kept hidden in his closet. Normally he would never even entertain such a thought, but he'd just received the biggest shock of his life and he wanted to end it before the numbness wore off.
Quickly he scribbled a note down on a piece of paper before he drew the knife across his wrists.
~*~
Heero found him a while later, lying in the middle of the floor. His eyes were clouded and he didn't respond to anything that was said. Quickly his friend ran from the room and called an ambulance. Duo heard it coming through the fog that encircled his thoughts and prayed that they would be too late.
***
Heero read the note and shuddered as he waited for the doctors to give them an update on their friend.
[I wish things could have turned out differently, Wufei. I really did love you. I'm sorry that I was such a bother that you didn't feel you could ridicule me to my face like you used to. Next time you want a boyfriend, try not cutting their heart out before you get around to telling them anything. I hope you're happy. I'm out of your life now, just like you wanted.]
"What did he say to him?" Heero demanded of Quatre. Wufei was still absent, but on his way to the hospital. Quatre quickly explained about Duo catching the tail end of something that had been said and his obvious jump to conclusions.
"It figures," Heero muttered. "Nothing those two do is ever simple."
***
When Duo woke up he was in a white room, with white curtains, and a white bedspread. "Am I dead yet?" he asked, looking around. He caught sight of his friends and let out a moan of despair.
"Duo, its okay. You're in the hospital," Quatre tried to explain, letting go of Trowa's hand. Nothing he did seemed to do anything to help his friend.
/Why? Why did they keep me alive? I wanted to die./
"You have to let us explain," Quatre said desperately, his voice taking on an edge.
"What is there to explain?" Duo snapped. "I heard what you and 'Fei were talking about. I'm not so stupid that I can't add two and two and come up with four."
"Duo!" Wufei cried, bursting into the room. "God, don't ever do something like that again! You had me worried sick! I swear, if you had died I would have killed you myself!" he yelled, fear showing in his eyes. The rest of the g-boys felt it would be better if they were alone and left discreetly.
"Why should it matter to you? It's not like you care," Duo said brokenly.
"You've got it all wrong," Wufei said, and proceeded to explain everything. "I was afraid of my feelings for you, and I was talking to Quatre about it. I was complaining about what other people were saying about you," he finished a short time later.
Duo said nothing, just looked into his eyes for a long drawn out moment. "I'm sorry," he said, breaking the heavy silence. "I just wanted so desperately to die right then."
"I know," Wufei said, touching his side. Duo cried out in pain and he quickly drew his hand back. Against Duo's protests he pulled the covers back, exposing Duo's chest. Dark bruises were scattered all over what parts of his body were visible. "I'll kill them," Wufei swore, anger coursing though him like it never had before.
"No, forget about it," Duo said.
"But Duo," he started to say, but the smile that broke out oh his love's face stopped him.
"You know, that's the first time you have ever said my name."
"Duo?" Wufei asked. He tried to think of a single other time before that he'd used it, but was unable to. "You're right."
"Promise me you still won't do anything that will get you kicked out of college?" Duo pleaded.
"But what if-,"
"Shh. Wufei, as long as you're near me, that's enough to keep me happy. Besides," he said, a mischievous glint coming to his eyes. "If it gets too rough I'll let you protect me."
Wufei smiled in spite of himself, glad to have the old Duo back. "Believe me, I'll be there if you need me," he said, before he bent his head and sealed the promise with a passionate kiss.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
Dream Keeper: Okay, they may have gotten a little OOC in the end, but we did good at the beginning, right?
Christa: We know it's not very good, but it _was_ a challenge fic you know. Please R&R which means read AND REVIEW and tell us that you liked.
Dream Keeper: Or didn't. Okay, bedtime. Night!
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