Evanescent
Chapter 2
Thanks for the review :) so I guess that means you want me to continue, huh? Okay, so the person narrating is…(like most of you couldn't guess, come on, it's me, lol) Chandler. I'm gonna switch back and forth from first person POV to third person, but when it's first person, it'll be him. And I'm not saying that what he's thinking is actually the way that everything is, it's just…what he's thinking. Does that make any sense whatsoever? I hope so, lol. Oh, and I forgot to say that I don't own the characters. Or the pair of pants that have been sitting in my closet for the past month or so that are my friend's…hmm…maybe I should give those back…
I can't hold on
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
With thoughts of failure sinking in
(By Myself, Linkin Park)
I always fuck up. Always. You hear my name, you think fuck up. It just…goes. I always fuck up. Always have, too. I was too much of a fuck up for my mom to handle, that's why she sent me to boarding school. That, and to get rid of me. How could she bring home all of her lovers with a kid there? That would make her a bad parent, god forbid. But, no, get rid of the kid, that puts her in the running for Mother of the Year. Though I think back then I just fucked up for the attention. But now…
Now, it's who I am. No matter what, it's what happens. No matter how good my intentions are, it doesn't matter. It's inevitable.
Once a fuck up, always a fuck up.
~*~
"Where's Chandler?" Monica asked, grabbing the pitcher of orange juice from the refrigerator.
"He's still pretty upset over Kathy," Joey shrugged.
"Is he okay?" Rachel asked, realizing for the first time that she'd hardly seen him in the past few weeks.
"I don't know…I mean, he'll hardly even speak to me," Joey said quietly. "I'm kind of worried about him, actually."
"Has he even left his room?" Monica sat down at the table next to Joey.
"Just to got to work…if even…"
"Do you think we should do something for him?"
"Well, what can we do?"
"I don't know," Monica admitted. "Why don't you just try talking to him again? See if you can get him to go somewhere or something…"
"I don't know," Joey nervously played with his coffee cup. "I mean, I guess I could try, but he'd hardly even say anything last time I tried to talk to him…"
~*~
Joey checked on me again today. He asked if I wanted to go get a drink with him, and, as appealing as the idea of going out and getting completely wasted is, I said no. Because I have a feeling that that's what "a drink" would turn into right now. But I'd really rather be sober right now. If not, I'd probably just do something else to fuck up again without even realizing it.
At least if I'm sober, I know I'm a fuck up.
Tbc…
Okay, um, still don't assume too much, lol. And the next couple of parts are probably gonna be pretty short, too, sorry about that. But please review, thanks…I'm really gonna need to know if you people still want me to keep going with this one…
