Evanescent
Chapter 12
(overly giddy and excited) "The really hot life guard said hi to me at work today!"
(mockingly) "Really? Said hi? When's the wedding?!"
Face eathing in yellow pants :-D Yeah, so, after talking to Becca about the faciest face eating for two hours a couple nights ago, I go downstairs to get my glasses so I can put them on after I take out my contacts. So, I'm looking around, wondering where I left them…and it takes a few minutes for me to realize that I'm already wearing my glasses, lol. Yeah, that's what talking about face eating (or, if you're me, face eathing) for an extended amount of time does to you…or that's what 3 in the morning does to you. So if you're interested, my best buddy Becca (I love saying that, lol) has a list of the top five Monica and Chandler faciest face eatings…and if you have NO idea what the hell I'm talking about, just nod and smile…and then read my fic…oookay….
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
When you tell me everything is wonderful now
(Wonderful, Everclear)
Monica walked into the guys' apartment, surprised to find Chandler already up. She hadn't been able to sleep and had decided to get up and make breakfast, not expecting anyone else to be up yet.
"Hey," Chandler said, not looking up from the newspaper in his hands. "What's a eight-letter word for explode?"
"What?" Monica laughed, sitting on the stool next to him at the foosball table.
"Crossword," he smiled, showing it to her. "I have three left," he grinned proudly.
"Three left?" she asked and he nodded. "Is that today's paper?"
"Yep," he replied, chewing on the pen cap.
"How long have you been up?"
"Since before the paper even got here," he laughed.
"Couldn't sleep?" he shook his head, still staring down. "Me neither," she continued to watch him, deep in thought. "So," she continued, trying to keep up the conversation, the silence between them still unbearably awkward. "It's crazy about Ross and Emily, huh?"
"What about them?" he asked, once again without looking up.
"That they're getting married."
"Ross is getting married?" his head immediately snapped up, and Monica realized she'd just managed to fit her entire foot into her mouth.
He hadn't known.
"Um, yes…"
"Why didn't he tell me?" he asked, more hurt than mad.
"I don't know, honey, he probably just assumed that one of us said something about it."
"But he's the one getting married, why wouldn't he tell me?" Chandler looked at her, not really expecting her to answer, but when she didn't, sighed. "Detonate."
"What?"
"Eight-letter word for explode…detonate…" he looked down, filling it in.
"Chandler…"
"Hm?" he didn't look up.
"Chandler," she repeated.
"I'm fine," he said quietly, and Monica sighed, the awkward silence filling the room once again.
"Want some breakfast?"
"Sure," he continued without looking up. "There's already coffee made if you want some."
Monica sighed, watching him. She could tell that he was hurt, which he had every right to be; one of his best friends hadn't told him he was getting married. She finally stood up, deciding that she'd have a talk with Ross later before starting on her original intent- breakfast.
~*~
"So guess who found out you were getting married today?" Monica asked as she sat down, joining everyone minus Chandler in sitting in the living room eating (I so just typed eathing…seriously, what is wrong with me? lol…).
"Who?" Ross asked, taking a bite of his pizza.
"Chandler," Monica replied, and everyone immediately turned to him, shocked.
"You didn't tell Chandler you were getting married?" Rachel stared at him in disbelief.
"Dude," Joey shook his head disapprovingly.
"Joe, you knew I didn't tell him," Ross looked at Joey.
"No, I didn't! I just knew he wasn't gonna be your best man!" Joey replied defensively.
Ross sighed as the three girls continued to stare at him, waiting for his explanation.
"Look, I just-I didn't know how to tell him that I was getting married, but that he wasn't going to be my best man…"
"Well that makes it better, then," Rachel said sarcastically.
"I know it sounds stupid, but…"
"It's only gonna kill him more when you tell him now because of the fact that you're getting married didn't come from you," Phoebe said, and the others nodded in agreement.
"I know, and I feel horrible, but I just-I didn't know how to tell him that."
"And why exactly don't you want him to be your best man?' Monica asked, and Joey looked down. He's been wondering that, too. Even though he loved the thought of being his best man, Ross had known Chandler for so much longer that he seemed like the more logical choice.
"It's not that I don't want him to be," Ross started. "It's just that… I don't know if he could-if he could…handle everything that needs to be done right now…"
"Ross, it's not like he-" Monica stopped suddenly when the door opened, Chandler walking in.
Chandler looked around at his five friends who'd suddenly gotten all too quiet. "Ya know, it's really not too obvious that you were talking about a person when you immediately stop talking as soon as they enter the room," he looked around, all of them avoiding eye contact. Chandler looked down, shaking his head. "Stop, just…stop," he finally said.
"Stop what?" Phoebe asked, the first to finally look up at him.
"Stop this," he motioned with his hands. "Stop putting on this act, stop walking on eggshells around me!" he paused, looking at Ross. "I'm a big boy, I can handle it," he added before turning toward his room.
Everyone looked around, Monica standing up to follow him.
"Leave me alone, Mon," he said without turning around, assuming that she'd follow him, and Monica immediately stopped, letting him slam his door shut behind him.
Chandler sighed as he collapsed down onto his bed, burying his face in a pillow. "I said leave me alone, Mon," he repeated, hearing the door open.
"What if it's not Monica?"
Chandler immediately got up, looking up at Ross, more hurt than anything else. As Ross stared back, he suddenly realized just how vulnerable Chandler looked. He'd never seen him completely vulnerable, defenses let down.
And Chandler knew it.
When Ross had walked in, it'd been too late. Too late to pretend it was okay. Too late to play it off and say something sarcastic. Monica had seen this side of him before, defenses let down, crying over something; Rachel even had on occasion. But in all of the years he'd known Ross, he never had. He'd never let himself.
"Look, man, I'm sorry that-"
"Whatever," Chandler cut him off, shaking his head as he walked across the room. "I'm sure you had your reasons," he grabbed a pack of cigarettes off his dresser before walking out the door, crossing the apartment, ignoring everyone and retreating to the solitude of the balcony.
Monica followed him this time, whether he wanted to be alone or not.
"Mon-"
"Chandler," she interrupted him before he had the chance to tell her to leave.
"Look, Mon, just leave me alone…I'm fine," he looked her in the eye, turning away with a sigh when she didn't respond or leave.
"You're allowed to not be fine," she finally said, and he turned to her. "You're allowed to have emotions, to let them show, to stop hiding behind the jokes and the sarcasm…You're allowed to cry…" she stared him in the eye before he looked down, biting his bottom lip. "Chandler, I didn't mean anyth-"
Chandler shook his head. "No, you did," he said, almost laughing. "You're right," he looked up at her. "God, you're right," he got up from leaning back against the balcony, crossing to the other side, facing away from her. Monica followed after a few minutes, walking over to him and putting her hand on his back.
"You okay?" she said quietly, not meaning to have offended him.
He looked up at her, and it was then that she realized he was crying. "Yeah," he smiled at her ironically. "Wonderful…"
Monica leaned in, hugging him tightly. "Do you wanna…talk?"
"Yeah," he pulled away, going back over to the window, offering his hand for her to take. "Talking would be good."
Tbc…
Yeah, I was gonna have there be more to this chapter, but I decided to split it into two parts or this one would've ended up being insanely long. So please review, and I'll have the next part up soon :)
