Title: "And We're Walking…."

Author: Chezza

E-mail: cyberchezza@tiscali.co.uk

Status: Complete

Sequel/Series: N/A

Summary: Kids + Long Journeys = Parents with the patience of saints….

Season: Set Season 7, but no real spoilers for that other than the fact that Daniel's back.

Spoilers: Emancipation. V. teeny ones for 'Torment of Tantalus' and 'Show & Tell'.

Category: Humour – yeah well, I couldn't stay away from it for long….

Characters: Jack O'Neill, Sam Carter, Daniel Jackson and Teal'c

Rating: PG-13 (for language)

Warnings: Language. No really? Oh and a minor amount of Daniel whumping courtesy of Jack, 'cos I

was feeling evil. g

File Size:

Archive: Jackfic, Helio, Fanfiction.net, Gateworld, SJD….. If anyone else wants it, just lemme know

where you're taking it, so I can come visit.

Disclaimer: Ain't mine! Surprise…. Stargate and it's characters etc, belong to all those folks who

actually make *money* out of it.

Authors Notes: I've done it! Finally, I've set a story offworld *and* mentioned the stargate - however

briefly. It's only taken me counts on fingers *nine* fics to manage it! This one came to me during an

extremely long walk the other day. I'm sure anyone with children will 'get' it….

~~~o0o~~~

The wormhole shut off behind them with a loud snap. Colonel Jack O'Neill, leader of the merry band

of explorers who'd just stepped through, alertly scanned the landscape in front of him. Seeing no

immediate threats to the safety of either himself or his team, he relaxed the grip on his P90.

Reaching up, he placed his shades over his eyes and inhaled deeply. The air smelled of…grass.

Which was hardly surprising, because the resilient and adaptable plant was virtually all that could be

seen in every direction, as far as the eye *could* see. It was like an immense blue-green ocean that

swayed and shimmered in the gentle breeze that was blowing.

Jack stepped to the edge of the dais on which the stargate rested and walked down the stone steps

to the DHD. The MALP had shown it to be intact, but he always liked to check it himself, just to make

sure. Call it paranoia, or a result of being caught out that way one too many times before. He glanced

over at the DHD. It looked fine to his eye. If there were any hidden problems, Carter would be able to

tell him when they came to use it. Wouldn't be the first time they'd had to do a manual dial-out. Jack

raised his eyes back to the surrounding scenery.

There were a few patches of scrubby looking trees and bushes dotted around. Far on the horizon,

Jack could just about see jagged shapes of darker blue, which might possibly be mountains. Or storm

clouds. He hadn't decided yet.

"Now *this*, " Jack said appreciatively, "Is more like it!"

Jack's 2IC, Major Sam Carter stepped down to stand beside him. "No trees, sir?"

"*Exactly*. I think we're back in Kansas, Tonto."

A series of groans issued forth from the other members of his team.

"What?" He asked innocently.

Sam just shook her head and smiled.

They stood for a minute and viewed the scene in front of them.

Far off to their left as they stood in front of the Stargate, was the large patch of white which they had

come to investigate. The shapes were indistinct when viewed with the naked eye, the details all

blurring into one. The UAV however, had shown them to be possible man made structures. Before

they'd lost the telemetry on it anyway.

That was the other reason for their visit. Someone had to pick the flamin' thing up again and lug it

back home. Apparently they were expensive and had to be retrieved whenever possible. Jack thought

privately that they should ask for their money back. All that money and they still couldn't design them

to actually *land* rather than crash whenever they were sent through the 'Gate? It smacked of lousy

engineering to him.

Daniel had been rummaging in his pack. He'd pulled out a set of binoculars, which he was currently

squinting through.

"I think they're tents, Jack. Could be a meeting place of some kind."

Jack frowned. "So…what? We've run across the intergalatic camping site for boy scouts?"

Sam suppressed a snigger. Daniel just glared at him. Before he could open his mouth to deliver a

cutting remark, a call from SG-1's fourth member interrupted him.

"Daniel Jackson!"

They all turned to view the big Jaffa. He was squatted on the other side of the DHD, his hand on a

large chunk of stone pressed into the ground.

"Wotcha got, T?" Jack asked, as they made their way over.

"I believe it to be a set of symbols, O'Neill."

Daniel's eyes lit up and he pushed past Jack and Sam in his eagerness to see.

Jack raised an eyebrow and turned to Sam. "Ya know, most *normal* people have that kind of

reaction to stuff like free beer."

"Or chocolate." She agreed.

"Jell-O."

"Ice-cream."

"Jell-O *and* ice-cream."

They shared a smile.

"So what's it say, Danny-boy?" Jack asked as they came to stand behind their colleagues.

Daniel was kneeling on the ground, busily peering at the stone, with his nose a couple of inches away

from it. He was tracing the carved lines with his hand and muttering to himself. Jack cocked his head

on one side, they just looked like funny little squiggles to him. With straight bits. Almost like those

stick-on Chinese character tattoos that Cassie liked so much. But not, 'cos he couldn't make them

out. Not that he could actually *read* Chinese – it was as difficult to read as it was to speak - but he

knew the meanings of a few characters.

"Not sure," Daniel murmured quietly, so engrossed he missed Jack calling him by the hated name.

"Looks Asian…"

Jack smiled quietly to himself. Yup, he'd been right.

"Maybe an earlier form, or a bastardisation of…"

"Language, Daniel." Jack teased.

Daniel glared up at him in exasperation. "You know what I mean, Jack."

"So what is it?"

Daniel frowned. "I'm not sure. Offshoot of the old Mongolian language, maybe…."

"Maybe?"

"Yes, *maybe* . You have to bear in mind that any language we come across has had anywhere

between 500 years and 2000 years to evolve offworld. At *least*."

"So…what's it say?"

"Umm, well I think this one may mean something like 'Exchange' and I'm fairly certain this one could

be the symbol for 'Gathering'…."

"Exchange Gathering?"

"Yes. Or it could mean 'Entertaining Gerbil'. I'm not sure."

"Okay…" Jack said slowly. "I *think* we'll go with the first one. "

It seemed to make slightly more sense for the sign to be informing them of an 'Exchange Gathering' -

whatever *that* meant - than a dancing rodent. Then again, those Kung Fu hamsters did seem to be

all the rage these days….

"Think it might have something to do with your scout camp over there?" Jack jerked his hand in the

direction of what Daniel had earlier confirmed as a group of tents.

"Mmm maybe." Daniel mused, studiously ignoring Jack's use of the boy scout analogy once more. "I

mean…that could definitely be classed a *gathering* and one purpose of a gathering can be to

exchange goods or services…."

"So, sorta like a trade fair?"

"Yes. It would fit. The early plainspeople of the Steppes - "

Jack frowned. Where had he heard that before? He wasn't sure, but it didn't bring to mind a pleasant

feeling. His subconscious had a knack for word association. He couldn't remember specific scenarios

without more details, but give him a word *related* to said scenario and he could instantly say

whether it had been good or bad. And the feeling he was getting right *now*, was that it hadn't been a

good one.

" - and they were hunter/gathers. Nomads if you will. They – "

Jack coughed, hoping to forestall a history lecture. Daniel took the hint for once.

" – uh, basically they roamed the plains in tribes and came together to trade or sort out disputes. The

Shavidi people we met were probably their descendents."

Deathly silence greeted Daniel's remark.

With that word, Jack's mind promptly provided the reason for his uneasy feeling.

Oh. *Them*. Crap.

Carter was the first to break the silence.

"Daniel, " she said in a tight voice, "let's get one thing clear right from the start, shall we?"

Jack winced.

She continued: "I don't care what these people's…cultural taboos are. Or how much of an affinity you

anthropologists have for dressing up. I'm an astrophysicist, *not* an anthropologist. And I swear I'll

shoot *anyone* who tries to make me wear a dress this time. Okay?"

"Yes, Sam." Daniel answered sheepishly.

Jack smirked. She had looked damn fine in that dress though….

She turned her death glare on him and he quickly wiped the smile from his face.

"Whatever you say, Major. Whatever you say."

He might have been able to make it an order back then. When it was all new and they were still

getting used to one another, but there was no *way* she'd let him pull that shit on her nowadays. And

he wouldn't want her to, it was another sign of how much she'd grown. How much more confident she

was as his 2IC. And he was proud of her for that.

She nodded. "Good. Just so long as we've got that cleared up."

Jack reached down and gave Daniel a hand up. "So. Whaddya say we go introduce ourselves?"

"Okay." Daniel said, pointing at the rough dirt track that headed off to their left, winding it's way

through the long grass. "It's this way."

"How d'ya know?"

After all, there was another track leading off to the right behind the Stargate.

"Because it says so."

"It does?"

"Well, yeah…"

Daniel pointed at the stone. The symbol for a left arrow was pretty much universal.

"Ah."

There was a pause. Jack looked at the other members of his team. Sam and Daniel were grinning

and even Teal'c looked amused.

He cleared his throat. Kids these days - no respect. No respect at all….

"So…to Oz."

~~~o0o~~~

They'd been walking for over two hours now. Daniel had taken point. There was a new culture for him

to meet and study. He may have been more cautious now, than he was the last time he'd met people

like these, but that didn't stop the eagerness to learn. He wouldn't go bounding in without a thought

for his own safety any more, but his enthusiasm still translated itself to his feet and pulled him

forward.

Jack let him. A team could only travel at the speed of its slowest member. Which was usually Daniel,

due to his nasty habit of spotting something that piqued his interest and stopping - or moving off - to

investigate it. Shame he hadn't lost that after his descension. Was that even a word?

At least with him in front, they could keep an eye on him and his antics. Thankfully there was nothing

around for him to study, except for grass and the encampment in front of him, so he kept moving. On

and on and on and…he really *was* the Duracell bunny. Definitely.

On the upside, the flat plains meant they'd be able to see any pending attack from miles away. Unless

it came from the air of course, in which case they'd be royally screwed because there was no cover.

Not that he was paranoid or anything. He really wasn't. It was just good tactics that's all. Yeah *right*.

Believe that you'll believe anything, his inner voice jibed. Jack was surprised that after seven years of

being shot at, run off and chased by angry mobs in 'welcome', none of them had developed a

pathologic fear of meeting people.

But hey, that was why they had Daniel. It was his job to make nice with the natives, so that didn't

happen. Jack much preferred his own role. Which generally consisted of standing around looking

menacing, in case things went south. It was far easier.

Which was why they were wandering along the path as they were; Daniel up front and eager, Teal'c

covering their six and Carter and him in the middle. Jack was happy with the current arrangement. He

didn't usually get to walk and chat with his 2IC. Normally he was on point, with Carter and Daniel in

the middle. Or Carter was on point and he was covering their six. A little variation stopped you getting

complacent.

Normally they didn't stray too far from the 'Gate when visiting a new planet. You never knew what

might happen, so the closer you were to your only way home, the better. Paranoia again., but in a

good way. By this point on a normal mission, Daniel would have his nose happily buried in whatever

rocks he'd managed to find this time and Carter would be off collecting samples of…whatever it was

that she collected samples of. Seven years and he still wasn't 'entirely' sure. He wasn't dumb enough

to try asking for an explanation either. It was amazing how easily they slipped back into old patterns.

Generally, if there was minimal risk, he had no worries about splitting the team in two, as it cut the

mission time down. Usually he split it Carter and Teal'c, Daniel and himself. Or sometimes Carter and

Daniel, Teal'c and himself. Not because he didn't like spending time with his 2IC, he did. *Really* did

in fact. And maybe that was part of the problem.

But mainly it was due to ingrained habit. It had been drummed into him a long time ago that when in

the field, you didn't have a team's CO and 2IC in the same place, at the same time, if you could at all

help it. If both were taken out, it left the team in disarray and instantly put the lives of the remaining

members in danger. He knew, he'd seen it happen. And that was not acceptable. At least that was the

reason he admitted to himself.

So, that brought them to here. Jack looked up at the encampment ahead and sighed heavily. It was

hard going. Yes, the plains were flat and the road was straight, but it didn't make for the most

*riveting* journey ever. Things weren't helped by the gravity being slightly stronger than they were

used to on Earth. There were gonna be some aching muscles by the time they got home.

Jack cast a surreptitious glance at his team-mates. No-one seemed to be flagging yet. Time to lighten

the mood. He turned round and started walking backwards facing his other team-mates. He found it

often helped on a long walk, especially if you were going uphill. It was probably just a psychological

reaction, but somehow it seemed easier.

"So kids," he began, "is it just me, or is that scout camp – " he jerked his thumb over his shoulder " –

not gettin' any damn closer?"

Carter grinned. She saw Daniel stiffen at Jack's words and couldn't resist. "You know, I think you

might be right, sir…."

Daniel shot her a dark look over his shoulder.

"I concur, O'Neill." Teal'c said calmly. "The encampment does not appear to be any closer than when

we began this journey."

Jack raised his eyebrows at Carter, as if to say 'I told you so'. Her grin grew wider. Teal'c had

certainly picked up on the subtleties of Earth humour over the years.

Daniel stopped in his tracks and spun round.

"Oh come on guys! It's just an illusion - you *know* we're getting closer!"

He paused when he saw Sam and Jack, (who'd turned round again at Daniel's outburst), stood

grinning at him. Even Teal'c was smirking.

He ground his teeth in frustration. "You're impossible! You know that? And you - " He pointed at Sam

" – shouldn't be encouraging him!"

She gave him an innocent look. "Me?"

"Yes, you!" He turned around and continued walking.

Jack chuckled. The man was just so *easy* to bait….

They began walking once more.

~~~o0o~~~

Another three-quarters of an hour passed. The encampment was definitely getting closer, but it was

still a fair way off yet. Jack decided to give it another quarter hour then call for a break.

They'd been walking along in silence pretty much since Daniel's outburst. It was a comfortable

silence, coming about because they were at ease in one another's presence and didn't feel the need

to make small talk, but still….

He sighed. Sam shot him a look, asking without words what was wrong.

"I'm bored." He admitted quietly.

A small smile flitted across her lips, she'd seen it coming. Personally, she'd been enjoying the walk. It

wasn't often the Colonel and herself walked together on missions and she had to admit, it was…nice.

He didn't invade her personal space, but still, she could feel him next to her as they walked. And it felt

good. Comfortable even. They hadn't talked much, but that didn't bother her, it was enough to know

he was there. And it seemed he felt the same. Within the last few minutes though, he'd begun to

fidget. She knew how he felt. It didn't look like there was going to be much to interest her on this

mission either.

"Me too."

He raised an eyebrow in mock surprise. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"I didn't think you *got* bored."

She shrugged. "No doohickeys to play with."

A large grin split his face. His right boot dug a large pebble out of the dirt and he kicked it forward.

"You'll ruin your boots."

He shot her a mock glare. "Yes, Mother."

They'd caught up to where the pebble had landed. Jack looked at her. She returned his gaze calmly,

not saying anything, but knowing instinctively what he was going to do. He swung his leg back and

belted the pebble with the end of his foot. If he'd been playing soccer, it would have been a perfect

toe-end chip forward into the goalmouth, leaving the keeper flatfooted. Sadly he wasn't. The pebble

flew through the air and snapped Daniel on the ass.

The unfortunate archaeologist let out a strangled yelp. They all stopped. Sam choked and turned

away, almost burying her head in Jack's shoulder. Don't laugh. *Don't* laugh….

Jack looked down at her, his eyes twinkling with laughter. 'Ooops.' He mouthed silently.

"For *God's* sake, Jack!"

Forcing her face to a sober expression, she looked over at the man she considered one of her best

friends. He was stood in front of them, one hand gingerly rubbing the now tender spot on his

backside.

Her mouth threatened to curve into a smile. She bit her lip. He'd never forgive her if she laughed at

him now. But oh, how she wished for Jonas and his love of video cameras at this precise moment. He

had taped nearly every single moment of some of their quieter missions whilst he'd been with them.

The Colonel had quipped he was suffering from 'if it moves, shoot it' syndrome.

Daniel was still glaring at the man stood beside her. She nudged his boot.

"Ahem. Sorry Daniel." He mumbled, not sounding apologetic in the slightest.

Daniel sighed. "Yeah, I just bet you are. You know, you can be such a *child* sometimes, Jack." With

that he turned and continued walking. His fingers still massaging the spot where the pebble had

landed.

Jack turned back to her. "Child?" He asked.

She bit her lip and looked down at the floor. Yeah, sometimes…it's what made him so endearing. And

sometimes such a pain in the ass. Pain in the ass…heh. Bet Daniel knew how that felt right now!

Sam decided to rely on the advice of her Father. 'If you have nothing good to say, then say nothing at

all.'

"No comment, sir." She said.

"Huh."

They started walking again. Silence reigned once more. Sam couldn't help it. She kept glancing at her

colleague in front. He'd stopped rubbing the spot where he'd been hit. Sam idly wished it was the man

next to her that was walking in front. It was one of the main advantages of being his 2IC, she had

decided. She got to walk *behind* him much of the time. And what a very cute behind it was as well,

she mused.

She jumped slightly when the voice of said cute behind, whispered softly in her ear. "Oh, Car-ter…"

She swallowed, unable to suppress a slight shiver at the sensation caused by his breath tickling her

ear.

"Yes, sir?"

"You ever been on any long journeys with your brother's kids?"

She frowned slightly, trying to remember. Well there had been that trip to the water park. She

grimaced at the memory. It had been a very hot day and she'd been stuck in the back between two

very antsy children. It hadn't been pleasant.

"Yes, sir." She said with feeling.

"So…you know what children get like when they're bored of travelling?"

"Yes, sir." Where was he going with this?

"And you know what they're likely to say?" He looked at her, willing her to understand.

Huh? Oooh. A light bulb clicked on and a slow smile spread across her face.

"*Yes*, sir."

He grinned. "Feel free to join in, Major."

Jack cleared his throat.

"Oh Daniel…." He called in a sing-song tone.

"What?!!" Came the peeved reply.

Jack looked at Sam. Sam looked at Jack. They both took a deep breath and together they chorused:

"ARE WE NEARLY THERE YET?"

- End -

~~~o0o~~~