When MarySue met her Maker
By: Violet Dawson
Dedication: This one's all yours Allyce!
Author's Notes: Found this hidden away on a floppy somewhere and thought I owed ya'll something since I haven't updated MIA in valar only knows how long. Oh yes, and the rules of reviewer's chocolate still apply, mind you. :)
Disclaimer: N'uma haba! Ilya en' ta Tolkien!
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"Oh Legolas! After everything I've been through, what with being the only survivor of my village when the orcs burned it to the ground and then being taken by them for their cruel purposes. Only to escape and then be captured by slave traders and sold to mortals, where I was raised among them until Elrond saved me from my fate-worse-then-death and adopted me as his own. How can you love me?"
Legolas looked at the amazing elf in front of him, the elf with beautiful curls falling in a golden river to just past her waist and expressive blue/purple/green eyes that held so much sorrow.
"How could I not love you, Ediearlenea?" he asked quietly, leaning in to kiss her perfect shell-like lips.
Ediearlenea closed her eyes, waiting for true loves first kiss. But it was not to be, for Ediearlenea disappeared from the plot as suddenly as she had appeared.
Legolas blinked a few times as canon returned to its place and walked away, wondering how he had gotten on a bridge in Rivendell in the first place.
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Ediearlenea kept her eyes closed as something made contact with her rose red lips, funny, she'd never have guessed that true love tasted a lot like cardboard. Deciding to inspect this phenomenon more closely, she parted her long lashes to see not her true love Legolas, but a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom...what the?
"Ediearlenea?" came a shy voice from somewhere nearby.
Ediearlenea turned around; her lips now forming a perfect pout, "who are you and what happened to my love scene with Leggy?"
"Oh that, well you can get back to that in a minute. I've wanted to meet you for a long time now; my name is Molly, I'm your author."
Ediearlenea was speechless for the first time in her long, toil-ridden life. This young girl sitting in front of her with a pimply face and greasy hair had created her, the perfect soul mate of an elven prince?
"No, no you can't be my author, because, you see, my author looks just like me. I am her self-insert after all! It says so right in the summery!" Ediearlenea smiled proudly as she thought of her story.
"I know that! I wrote you! Like it or not, you're me, well what I would look like if I lived in Middle Earth anyways!"
And Molly looked over her creation and saw that it was perfect.
"I'm...you...?" Ediearlenea asked, pointing from herself to the greasy girl.
"That's right!" Molly smiled as she stood up to her full height of four foot seven.
"Well, you've met me, now put me back in my story or I am so telling Leggy!" Ediearlenea tried to yell, but the words came out with all the noise of tinkling bells.
"I will in a minute." Was all the girl would say as she continued to look at Ediearlenea with absolute awe.
Ediearlenea looked around what seemed to be her author's room with an impatient sigh; Lord of the Rings posters covered the walls as well as the ceiling and Legolas plushies nearly filled the bed.
"The Fellowship of the Ring: Extended Version" was playing on a small TV in the corner, paused at the scene of Arwen and Aragorn on the bridge in Rivendell. Well, that explained a lot. The only piece of paraphernalia the room seemed to be missing was a set of books.
Curiosity showed plainly on Ediearlenea's fine features; "Don't you have the books?" she asked.
For even MarySue knows there are books, she might refuse to read them, she might even refuse to acknowledge their existence, but deep in her heart of hearts she knows they exist.
"Books? There's Lord of the Rings books! No way! Do they have Leggy in them?" Molly cried with fangirlish delight.
Before Ediearlenea could roll her multi-colored eyes the bedroom door was kicked open and three women dressed all in black stood in the doorway.
"Are you Edi...Edi...Edi..." asked the blond of the trio.
"Ediearlenea." Supplied her brunette friend matter-of-factly.
"Are you her?" The first asked again, earning a nod from the Sue in question.
"Then you'll have to come with us."
To the surprise of all, Ediearlenea merely sighed, accepting this new sorrow as she had all the other trying times of her life. Though she filed away every detail to get pity from Legolas later. The blond ushered her out of the room, unreasonably large gun placed in the small of the Sue's back.
Molly still stood in shock of the fact that there were books while the third woman made quick work of collecting all items of fangirlish nature and the computer from which the offending Sue was created and her brunette companion left a copy of the trilogy on the now empty desk. The ladies nodded once, satisfied that their work here was done and head down after the blond.
And back in Rivendell every male resident breathed a sigh of relief as the three mysterious women in black led Ediearlenea away.
By: Violet Dawson
Dedication: This one's all yours Allyce!
Author's Notes: Found this hidden away on a floppy somewhere and thought I owed ya'll something since I haven't updated MIA in valar only knows how long. Oh yes, and the rules of reviewer's chocolate still apply, mind you. :)
Disclaimer: N'uma haba! Ilya en' ta Tolkien!
%%%%%%
"Oh Legolas! After everything I've been through, what with being the only survivor of my village when the orcs burned it to the ground and then being taken by them for their cruel purposes. Only to escape and then be captured by slave traders and sold to mortals, where I was raised among them until Elrond saved me from my fate-worse-then-death and adopted me as his own. How can you love me?"
Legolas looked at the amazing elf in front of him, the elf with beautiful curls falling in a golden river to just past her waist and expressive blue/purple/green eyes that held so much sorrow.
"How could I not love you, Ediearlenea?" he asked quietly, leaning in to kiss her perfect shell-like lips.
Ediearlenea closed her eyes, waiting for true loves first kiss. But it was not to be, for Ediearlenea disappeared from the plot as suddenly as she had appeared.
Legolas blinked a few times as canon returned to its place and walked away, wondering how he had gotten on a bridge in Rivendell in the first place.
%%%%%%
Ediearlenea kept her eyes closed as something made contact with her rose red lips, funny, she'd never have guessed that true love tasted a lot like cardboard. Deciding to inspect this phenomenon more closely, she parted her long lashes to see not her true love Legolas, but a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom...what the?
"Ediearlenea?" came a shy voice from somewhere nearby.
Ediearlenea turned around; her lips now forming a perfect pout, "who are you and what happened to my love scene with Leggy?"
"Oh that, well you can get back to that in a minute. I've wanted to meet you for a long time now; my name is Molly, I'm your author."
Ediearlenea was speechless for the first time in her long, toil-ridden life. This young girl sitting in front of her with a pimply face and greasy hair had created her, the perfect soul mate of an elven prince?
"No, no you can't be my author, because, you see, my author looks just like me. I am her self-insert after all! It says so right in the summery!" Ediearlenea smiled proudly as she thought of her story.
"I know that! I wrote you! Like it or not, you're me, well what I would look like if I lived in Middle Earth anyways!"
And Molly looked over her creation and saw that it was perfect.
"I'm...you...?" Ediearlenea asked, pointing from herself to the greasy girl.
"That's right!" Molly smiled as she stood up to her full height of four foot seven.
"Well, you've met me, now put me back in my story or I am so telling Leggy!" Ediearlenea tried to yell, but the words came out with all the noise of tinkling bells.
"I will in a minute." Was all the girl would say as she continued to look at Ediearlenea with absolute awe.
Ediearlenea looked around what seemed to be her author's room with an impatient sigh; Lord of the Rings posters covered the walls as well as the ceiling and Legolas plushies nearly filled the bed.
"The Fellowship of the Ring: Extended Version" was playing on a small TV in the corner, paused at the scene of Arwen and Aragorn on the bridge in Rivendell. Well, that explained a lot. The only piece of paraphernalia the room seemed to be missing was a set of books.
Curiosity showed plainly on Ediearlenea's fine features; "Don't you have the books?" she asked.
For even MarySue knows there are books, she might refuse to read them, she might even refuse to acknowledge their existence, but deep in her heart of hearts she knows they exist.
"Books? There's Lord of the Rings books! No way! Do they have Leggy in them?" Molly cried with fangirlish delight.
Before Ediearlenea could roll her multi-colored eyes the bedroom door was kicked open and three women dressed all in black stood in the doorway.
"Are you Edi...Edi...Edi..." asked the blond of the trio.
"Ediearlenea." Supplied her brunette friend matter-of-factly.
"Are you her?" The first asked again, earning a nod from the Sue in question.
"Then you'll have to come with us."
To the surprise of all, Ediearlenea merely sighed, accepting this new sorrow as she had all the other trying times of her life. Though she filed away every detail to get pity from Legolas later. The blond ushered her out of the room, unreasonably large gun placed in the small of the Sue's back.
Molly still stood in shock of the fact that there were books while the third woman made quick work of collecting all items of fangirlish nature and the computer from which the offending Sue was created and her brunette companion left a copy of the trilogy on the now empty desk. The ladies nodded once, satisfied that their work here was done and head down after the blond.
And back in Rivendell every male resident breathed a sigh of relief as the three mysterious women in black led Ediearlenea away.
