Detective Conan and Magic Kaito characters, settings, and ideas do not belong to me but to Aoyama Gōshō.
Warnings: The Trembling Police Headquarters: 12 Million Hostages (Files 369-73/Episode 304) and The Lost Ship in the Sky (Movie 14) spoilers
Insanity Welcomes Everybody, Apparently
By Taliya
"It's amazing to me how busy a KID heist always is," Takagi Wataru commented as he passed through the security checkpoint. He rubbed his cheek with a wince, knowing that he would have a lovely bruise forming where Inspector Nakamori had given him a hard pinch.
"But did he have to tug so hard?" Satou Miwako griped, rubbing her own cheek as she scowled at the Division Two inspector.
Wataru chuckled nervously. "It's standard procedure, so I've been told." At least there was small consolation that both of them had seen the inspector himself get his cheek viciously pulled. "Although…"
The man glanced behind him and eyed one Shiratori Ninzaburo, who… for whatever reason, had decided to attend this particular Kaitou KID heist as well. He wondered at the man's presence. Does he know something about this heist that I am unaware of? Is some premeditated murder about to happen? he thought, Because, why else would he be here, unless…? His mind skittered back to the first heist he had been awake for: the one in which he had assisted in taking two would-be assassins into custody.
From there, his mind jumped to that alleyway showdown in which KID had singlehandedly taken down a small team of assassins several months back, one of which had been one of the ringleaders of whatever group they had been a part of. It was also the night that Wataru had brought an injured KID back to his apartment and had treated his wounds—had seen his true face. Now, it was only a matter of time before the police had collected enough hard evidence after the confessions to begin a serious cleansing operation.
The heist location was inside Shinjuku's Park Hyatt Tokyo, a trio of interconnected buildings with the tallest of the three rising to fifty-two stories. The prize of the night was a beautiful forty-seven-carat, marquis-cut gold topaz named the Peregrine's Eye. It was the centerpiece of a rather elaborate palladium statement necklace, filled with more gold topaz and pavé-set diamonds. The necklace was the highlight of a small exhibition by a private owner, who had rented out the New York Bar—a sky lounge on the fifty-second floor, and had it converted into a small gallery for his jewelry collection: the collection that he had purchased for his now-late wife.
"Takagi-kun," Satou called, and Wataru snapped out of his musings to gaze questioningly at his partner. "What exactly do we do here?"
"Try to catch KID, of course," chirped a familiar child's voice, and the two officers turned to find Edogawa Conan strolling up to them. "Hello, Satou-keiji, Takagi-keiji."
"Conan-kun!" the brunette exclaimed, and the sergeant had little doubt that the assistant inspector was wondering about the boy's presence even as he offered his own greeting. "Wha—How are you back here?" she asked, glancing out the window at the line of policemen and the barricades on the street that were keeping the gentleman thief's fans at bay.
Conan grinned. "I solved the riddle and gave it to Nakamori-keibu to help," he replied with a wide grin.
Wataru nodded in greeting, already used to the idea of Conan being at a KID heist. Satou, on the other hand, was apparently stunned speechless as she stared at the child.
Conan's brows furrowed as he gazed at them. "Is there a reason why Division One is in attendance?"
The sergeant blinked. "It's just the two of us—and Shiratori-san… isn't it? I…" He trailed off, abruptly wondering whether or not it was a good idea to mention that the magician had specifically extended an invitation to him to participate in a heist.
The child quirked a skeptical brow at him, despite making any comment on his answer. What was going on? The pair of policemen headed towards the display with the Peregrine's Eye inside, the boy following. A ring of Task Force officers surrounded the display case, and only after verifying their identity once more were they allowed within touching distance of the plexiglass.
The necklace was—hideously gaudy, in Wataru's private opinion. It glittered magnificently beneath the case's LED lighting, but the officer felt it was almost bright enough to blind him, what with how it refracted light. Beside him, Satou cooed, and the sergeant suddenly felt a flush creep up the back of his neck. Is this the kind of jewelry I'd have to buy to impress her? he thought, a touch hysterical before reality reasserted itself and he mentally slapped himself. Why am I even thinking about something like that?
"It's… ah…" he began, trying to find an adjective that adequately described his decidedly mixed feelings regarding the necklace.
"It's ugly," Conan stated so flatly that Wataru had to blink twice as he stared at the boy. Conan was studying the necklace intently, hands in his pockets and glasses lenses glinting in the otherwise dim interior lighting.
"Three more minutes!" Nakamori shouted from somewhere behind him, and with the time notice, the younger detective bid Satou and Wataru farewell to station himself wherever he intended to be once the heist began.
Wataru glanced around, trying to figure out a somewhat strategic location to start the heist. He abruptly wished that he had asked his partner to meet up with him earlier, to allow them both enough time to case out the bar and its overall floor layout. A look about the place revealed that Conan had disappeared from view, and that—why was Shiratori lurking in the far corner, watching him and Satou with a decidedly frosty glare? And the other men scattered about in plainclothes—wait, were they not all officers within his division…?
"One minute!"
"This way," the sergeant said, and grasping Satou's hand, he pulled them over to a far corner of the room. He must have imagined the strangled wheeze that came from Shiratori's direction.
"Why here?" Satou asked as she obediently followed Wataru's lead.
The brunet hummed. "The last time I got roped into a KID heist—not the Four Masterpieces one, the Ladybird Topaz one—KID doused the entire place in sleeping gas. Since we don't have gas masks with us, it's better for us to be away from the target. Ah, that is, unless you feel like potentially being trampled on."
The assistant inspector grimaced. "No, that's… not something I'd be keen on trying." Satou watched the room with sharp eyes. "Is there a reason we don't have gas masks now?"
"Not needed, I think," Wataru chuckled nervously, and his insides twisted at the idea of admitting that he had not brought gas masks because Conan had said there likely would not be sleeping gas this time around. He had taken the words of a six-year-old at face value and had listened without any hesitation. The thought made him pause, and he contemplated his relationship with the boy, how deep his trust went. Conan had given him a gas mask that time, and Wataru had taken it without question.
Why was that?
His mind instantly flashed to that moment in the bomb-rigged elevator in Touto Tower—to that precipice upon which the two of them had stood, shoulder-to-metaphorical-shoulder, on the edge of the abyss and stared death in the eye. It had been an immeasurably tiny instant of time in which Wataru had finally been able to actually see Conan for the person he truly was, rather than who he played himself up to be on a day-to-day basis.
"… the bomb might be there for all I know, but… I have one friend who is so very dear to me and who I cannot lose no matter what," Conan had said. His eyes, as he gazed at Wataru, were sorrowful and grateful and remorseful. "I'm sorry, Takagi-keiji…"
"Oh," Wataru breathed, having not expected an apology from the boy he had come to view as so much more than a simple child. His mind wandered to Satou's face, considered the fact that he would never see her again. "It's fine…" A stray thought occurred to him and he spoke without thinking it over. "Ah, Conan-kun, while we're at it… would you mind telling me one more thing?" Wataru added, steeling himself for the answer to a question he had long desired to ask of the boy but had been afraid of what he might discover. He took a breath, working up his resolve since the question was already out and laid out before them before he asked, tentatively and cautiously, "Who in the world are you?"
Conan had blinked at him from where he sat on the edge of the elevator's emergency escape, feet dangling into the cabin space and bomb ticking away at his back. His tipped his head down, glasses lenses flashing in the light from the elevator's interior as a melancholy smirk curved his lips. "Ah," he murmured quietly with a small chuckle, the sound full of an understanding beyond Wataru's comprehension. "If you truly wish to know…" he began, the childish pitch of his voice dropping into something deeper—something that hinted at a mind and soul so much older than that of his physical appearance—that it had the older detective breaking out in gooseflesh all over.
The boy lifted his chin, blue eyes locking with Wataru's in a stare so intense it made his breath catch in his chest. There were so many things in that child's eyes, filled with far too many emotions and disappointments and regrets for someone only six years of age. His next words chilled the detective to the core with a horrifying finality despite the fact that they both knew that they were going to die within the next few minutes. "… I will tell you. In the next world, I mean…"
"Back with us, Takagi-keiji?" murmured a familiar voice so close to Wataru's ear that he could feel the heat of the speaker's breath on his skin.
He twisted to look with a start, only to find himself nearly nose-to-nose with a grinning Kaitou KID. Beside him, Satou wordlessly gaped at the thief's ability to sneak up on literally anyone. This close, KID's face was exactly like how he remembered it the night he had recovered in the officer's apartment: startlingly similar to Kudou Shinichi's, and once again far too young to be committing crimes such as this. While Satou had had questions regarding Kudou Shinichi being Kaitou KID after the Lady Sky heist, once Wataru had overcome his initial surprise upon seeing that familiar face, he had simply rolled with it and focused his energies on doing what he could to stop the Red Siamese Cats from spreading further panic.
"THREE!" bellowed Nakamori from somewhere within the lounge.
"I told you," KID hummed as he backed away to give the brunet some much needed—and appreciated—breathing room.
"TWO!"
He beamed as he whispered, "I treat those I like—"
"ONE!"
"—just a little differently!"
Smoke instantly filled the room, cutting KID out of his line of sight.
Wataru coughed and remained where he was, doing his best to suppress the noise he was making in order to determine his location relative to everything else. Satou was not far from him to his left, and he reached tentatively out at shoulder level and fervently hoped he would not accidentally grope her breasts. "Satou-san, you there?" Around him sounded a chorus of surprised yelps and shrieks, mingled with paint-peeling snarling from Nakamori.
A hand lightly smacked him in the face, the action quickly followed by, "Oh, sorry!" from Satou, somewhere nearby.
Wataru quickly grasped the waving hand, pleased to have a physical connection to his partner when he could not see her. "I got you, Satou-san!"
"I hope everyone's comfortable," KID said from somewhere nearby, and as soon as he spoke, the mist began to clear.
The policeman soon discovered that the hand he had been holding… was not Satou's.
It was KID's… who had shockingly taken off his gloves in order to grasp his hand. The magician's hand was warm and calloused, the grip firm, yet careful. KID's other hand was clasped… in Satou's. The woman in question was staring at the thief in shock, and Wataru could tell she was frozen in indecision whether to tackle him using their physical connection or yank her hand out of his.
KID took the decision literally out of her hands by lifting hers to his lips, pressing a light kiss to her knuckles. "While I am pleased you are safe from the traps—" and here Wataru finally noticed that every officer aside from them—and Conan—had been pinned to the walls with nets, though no one appeared to be injured. His brow furrowed as he noticed just how many of his coworkers from Division One were scattered with Division Two Task Force officers, Shiratori included. What in the world had possessed all of them to attend a KID heist?
Conan similarly observed the trapped policemen before turning back to the phantom thief. He folded his arms across his chest. "You're not here just for the necklace, are you, KID?" he asked, a mischievous light dancing in his eyes.
"Ah, how transparent I am for you to have seen me through, Tantei-kun!" the magician sighed in mock offense. He drew his hands together, in turn drawing Wataru and Satou together, and slipped their hands into each other's while releasing his own. "I merely wanted to give my friend here a little help," he said with a wink as he deftly slid his gloves back on from wherever he had stowed them. Around them, the protests of a number of people drifted towards the quartet, most of them claiming foul with KID's interference.
Wataru felt his face burn as Satou turned confused, suddenly hopeful eyes on him.
Off to the side, Conan facepalmed. "Hopeless, meddling romantic," he accused.
"Hush, you," KID chided with a shushing sound. "I don't see you moving forward anytime soon, so please be quiet, Peanut Gallery."
Conan sputtered indignantly, and both Wataru and Satou could not contain a chuckle over their banter as Satou shyly interlaced her fingers with Wataru's.
KID leaned over and lightly pecked Satou on the cheek. "My blessings to you both," he murmured with a wide smile as Satou blushed, Wataru spluttered, Conan groaned, and a cacophony of death threats were directed at the phantom thief. Wataru, while both inordinately pleased and embarrassed beyond belief, could not help but notice the flash of desperate, agonized yearning that had momentarily shuttered the brightness in the thief's eyes as the man had given his benedictions, and it made him wonder who the magician held in his own heart, but could not have. No doubt due to his literal current profession, as it was unlikely the object of his affection knew of his identity and kleptomaniac pastime.
"And now," KID announced as he waltzed over to the display case housing the Peregrine's Eye. He threw his cape over the Plexiglass, the fabric whirling in a fluttering circle above it without ever touching as he spun, and when he completed a single turn, the necklace was gone from its stand and now draped across KID's fingers. "It is time for me to perform my vanishing act."
"Not if I catch you first," Conan challenged with a fierce grin.
The thief smirked in response. Sweeping his cape around himself, he doused the place in more smoke and fled. Through the thick mist and his own coughing, Takagi heard the fading pattering of feet and Conan's shouted, "Come back here, KID!"
"Satou-san," he hacked, "you okay?"
"Yes," she replied.
Wataru coughed a few more times before he suggested, "Should we release everyone since it seems KID has left?"
"What about Conan-kun?" the female officer asked.
Leading Satou by the hand, the pair began to feel their way towards the perimeter of the room, "Conan-kun—surprisingly enough—can handle KID on his own," he said softly enough that only his partner could hear his answer.
Her grip on his fingers tightened in response. "But he's only seven!" she hissed.
Wataru stopped and swiveled on his heel, lightly tugging Satou closer so that he could just barely make out her face in the dense mist. "Satou-san," he murmured, "Please believe me when I say that I know without a doubt that KID would not harm Conan-kun."
Satou took one step closer so that he could more clearly see her serious, suspicious expression. "How do you know that?" she challenged.
There was a moment of hesitation, of furious and rapid debate on whether it would be beneficial to let her in on his—what exactly was his relationship with KID anyway?—somewhat illicit and highly confusing kind-of-but-not-really-friendship with the phantom thief. "I'll tell you later," he promised, and moved to help release his coworkers from the netting that kept them trapped against the walls.
"So?" Satou demanded the moment the doors to Wataru's ER34 shut. "What is this thing with you have going with KID?"
"You… didn't have to phrase it quite like that," he remarked with a visible cringe as he started his vehicle. "And… do I need to explain now?" At the moment, Wataru would much rather discuss the recent development in his and his partner's relationship, courtesy of the aforementioned phantom thief.
Satou huffed, crossing her arms as she stared at him with skepticism. "Is there something else you'd rather discuss?"
Courage, Wataru, he mentally coached himself, KID had enough faith in you to blatantly set you up with Satou-san in front of everyone, so just go for it! Gripping his steering wheel so tightly the pleather creaked, he said, "I'd rather discuss us." He was inordinately proud of himself for not choking on his own tongue even as he felt his face light on metaphorical fire.
The woman in his passenger seat immediately shrunk into her chair, and she turned her face towards the window. "Oh," she breathed, "that."
"Would you rather discuss this somewhere outside of the office?" he suggested, as he was currently driving in that general direction.
"We'll go there," she sighed. "My car's there, and there's a few things I also need to pick up."
They sat in silence for several minutes, Wataru fidgeting at the awkwardness whenever they had to wait at a light. "Uh," he began after much mental pep-talking before he blurted out, "Satou-san, would you—wouldyouliketogooutwithme?" The policeman thought it was a miracle that his face had not melted already from how hot he felt.
"Yes!" Satou twisted so fast in her seat that Wataru jumped, resulting in the ER34 swerving somewhat dangerously for several seconds. "Sorry," she apologized contritely after the vehicle was safely under control once more.
"It's fine, Satou-san," Wataru lightly wheezed. "I just… I didn't think you'd accept."
He could feel her incredulous stare on him. "Why would I not accept?"
Wataru rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "It's just… you're so popular, and… you're so pretty…" He mumbled the last bit quietly. He jumped when he felt a hand gently rest on one of his, and he spared a moment to glance at his passenger.
Satou smiled warmly at him. "Takagi-kun, I would very much like to go out with you."
The policeman switched his grip on the steering wheel to that of Satou's fingers, bringing her hand up so that he could press a soft kiss to the back of it. "You honor me, Satou-san," he said with a quick but heartfelt smile at her, and the rest of the drive to headquarters was spent in comfortable silence with clasped hands.
Wataru parked his car in the lot, and the two of them made their way up to Division One's floor. The office was empty, though he was not surprised since it was well past ten in the evening and most of his coworkers had been at the KID heist not one hour ago. He flipped through a few case files, debating whether or not he wanted to take a few home to read through. Satou was at her own desk, clicking through something on her computer.
Footsteps made him glance up, and he frowned as his boss, Megure Juuzo, stepped into the bullpen. The portly man blinked. "What are you two doing here?" he asked curiously.
"I had some things to pick up," Satou answered.
"We'd just come back from Kaitou KID's heist and I had to drop Satou-san off," Wataru explained.
Megure blinked. "Huh," he said. "Well, don't stay too late," he remarked as he made his way to his office. There was some rummaging around before he emerged without anything in his hands. "Have a good night, you two," he said as he made his way out.
"Good night, Megure-keibu," both he and Satou chimed.
"And also…" Megure paused at the door to the communal Division One Homicide Unit's offices. He looked over his shoulder and grinned widely. "I look forwards to seeing future little detectives from you two," and fairly bolted from the room.
Wataru stared at the door for a long moment, then traded a baffled glance with Satou. "I—" he started, right as Satou began, "Was that—"
"KID?!" they both said in unison.
Satou was the first to crack up, laughing so hard she had to clutch her sides. Wataru followed not long after, his hands pressed to his face at the sheer chutzpah of the magician.
"You owe me a story," Satou reminded once her giggles had abated.
"Indeed, I do," Wataru agreed. He gathered his belongings and stood, strolling over to her desk. Satou swiveled to gaze up at him. "Would you like me to explain our situation over lunch and coffee tomorrow?"
The female officer smiled, and it was the most brilliant thing Wataru had ever seen. "I'd like that," she said. "What time?"
As tomorrow was Sunday, Wataru had no particularly pressing appointments in his schedule. "Would eleven-thirty at Jinya work?" he suggested.
Satou collected her own things and stood, freeing one hand to grasp his. "Perfect," she agreed, and though they did not hold hands as they made their way to the parking lot and to their respective vehicles, they walked very close to each other down the hallways.
Wataru walked her to her car and tentatively tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Good night, Satou-san."
"Miwako," she corrected.
The policeman nearly swallowed his tongue. "M-M-Miwako-san," he managed.
Miwako chuckled and boldly pecked him on the cheek. "Good night, Wataru," she hummed, and slid into her RX-7.
Wataru floated back to his car, and when he came to, he had somehow managed to make it home in one piece.
I need to thank KID, he thought as he flopped onto his bed after showering, because his insanity has clearly infected other people if Sat—Miwako-san was willing to date me.
As he drifted off into sleep he wondered, Then again, isn't sanity overrated anyway…?
Author's Note: A little on the short side, but I kind of ran out of steam yet still wanted this done. Apologies if this wasn't as great as the previous installments. This, I have decided, is the final installment to the Insanity, Apparently series. A huge thank you to everyone who has stayed with me from the very first prompt fic that kicked the whole thing off. I've had so much fun writing these whenever inspiration struck. And yes, I tweaked the conversation between Shinichi and Wataru from the scene in the elevator, rewording it to better suit my purposes while keeping the meaning intact. I hope you enjoyed it.
Completed: 31.03.2022
