TRANSFORMERS: CYBERTRON SAGA
NOBLE DEMON Special #1: A Time of Peace.
byline: Anubis C. Soundwave

Scene: 1

Slingshot and Air Raid, in jet mode, escort a black jet to Autobot Headquarters. The three jets land; Slingshot and Air Raid transform.

"This guy wants to see Optimus Prime," says Air Raid, noting a glowering Turbo outside Autobot Headquarters.

"Yeah, the clown claims to be the Head Senator of Gobotron," snorts Slingshot.

"The 'clown's' claim is valid," says Turbo, scowling. "Good day, Head Senator Karakawa," he says, bowing to the jet.

The black jet transforms, then bows to Turbo. "Good day, Lieutenant Senior," says Senator Karakawa.

"You know, sir," says Turbo, "it would have been more appropriate for you to advise us of your intent to visit the Ark: for proper security escort."

"I was recently advised myself," says Senator Karakawa, "of a peacemaking opportunity by Cybertron's diplomatic wing."

"Ain't that just Skywarp?" asks Air Raid.

"You would be correct, Air Raid," says Senator Karakawa. "I didn't want to miss the chance to bring swift resolution to the conflict on Cybertron."

"So we and the Guardians are all going to cut loose on Megatron, right?" asks Slingshot.

"No..." states Senator Karakawa, frowning.

"With all due respect, sir-and I'm sorry about the 'clown' bit earlier, by the way," says Slingshot, "wiping out that frag-pile of a non-aggression treaty you've got with Megatron and letting the fighters deal with the Decepticons is the swiftest means to conflict resolution."

Senator Karakawa scowls. "The Beta Cygnus II Pact is designed to prevent unnecessary violence and destruction," he says, "and ensure that Gobotron is ably protected from the Cybertron Empire's ambitions."

"Yeah..." says Air Raid, staring at Senator Karakawa. "Did Soundwave write that thing?"

"I did," says Senator Karakawa, "and the Gobotron Senate ratified it unanimously, with Senator Nanatsuro as the minority signatory."

"Wow," says Air Raid. "I didn't even know the treaty had a formal name."

"Ain't your grandpappy trying to kill that fraggin' treaty at least once a week?" snorts Slingshot to Turbo's internal radio.

"What do you mean by that?" radios Turbo.

"What in my query string didn't you grok?" asks Slingshot via radio.

"The 'grandpappy' bit," Turbo radios back.

"You know: the rustbucket who looks like you, bellows like you on the Senate floor, and corrects all of Kup's old Second War stories," radios Slingshot, grinning at Turbo.

"Senator Nanatsuro and I don't have that kind of relationship," states Turbo flatly through the radio.

Slingshot studies Turbo a moment, then turns to Senator Karakawa. "What do you want to talk to Prime about, sir?" he asks.

"Your leader's recent overture of reconciliation towards Megatron," says Senator Karakawa.

"Senator," says Air Raid, "I'm sure you know that effort crashed and burned horribly."

"Worse than Fireflight," snorts Slingshot to Air Raid via the LAN.

"Nothing's that bad, dude," counters Air Raid through the LAN.

"No way is Optimus going to surrender to Megatron," says Slingshot via the LAN. "Megatron ought to surrender to him after all the hell he put Optimus-and everybody-through."

"The both of you are very young," says Senator Karakawa, "yet you have formed such strong opinions."

"Actually, sir," says Slingshot, "I'm 7.2 M-cycles old. I just look good because one: I'm a jetwarrior, and two: I spent five M-cycles in stasis lock."

"Ah," muses Senator Karakawa. "The latter would explain your immaturity," he continues.

"I'm immature because I don't want us to bend over and take it from Megatron in the name of peace?" demands Slingshot.

"I am considered naive," says Senator Karakawa stonily, "because I don't believe that freedom can be bought with brutality and strife. Therefore, Slingshot," he continues, "you can empathize with my frustration."

"Dude," says Air Raid, studying Senator Karakawa, "I know we're mean old insurgents and all, but really: you and Slingshot are on the same team. We all want peace."

Senator Karakawa gazes at Air Raid.

"Peace and freedom go hand-in-hand," Air Raid continues. "Megatron, despite his philosophy of 'peace through tyranny', is our mutual enemy."

"Is that so?" asks Senator Karakawa.

"Yeah," says Air Raid, "so let's join forces and beat the scrap out of him so we can have our freedom and peace."

"What of those who seek a nonviolent solution," counters Karakawa, "and those who believe in the righteousness of Megatron's cause?"

Slingshot touches Air Raid's shoulder. "You're wasting your time, guy," he says. "The senator wants peace at any price."

Air Raid sighs. "I know you think freedom costs too much in fuel and treasure," he says to Senator Karakawa, "but you get peace thrown in for free after the fighting's over."

"Ignore him," Slingshot says quizzically. "He's starting to sound like Swindle." He walks away, entering Autobot Headquarters.

"Take that back, Slingy!" demands Air Raid, following him inside.

"Are the Aerialbots always so spirited?" asks Senator Karakawa.

"You got off light today, sir," grins Turbo, "as it was just those two. Get all five of them together on you, and there would be no end."

Senator Karakawa smiles. "I hope that Optimus understands," he says, "that I don't intend any harm."

"You tell him your honest opinion of the Governor-general," quips Turbo, "and Optimus will probably be your best friend."

Senator Karakawa chuckles. "Typically, Lieutenant," he says, "you and the other Guardians in his unit misinterpret my political disagreements with him for personal animus towards him."

"Leader One doesn't completely disagree with you, sir," says Turbo. "He's just annoyed that you're making our job damn-near impossible."

"We're both very passionate," says Senator Karakawa, "and determined to protect Gobotron in the way we each think best."

"Coming to common ground, then," says Turbo, stroking his chin, "is the challenge."

"The greater challenge," says Senator Karakawa, "is coming to an agreement with Senator Nanatsuro, my fiercest political opponent. In that respect, I consider the Beta Cygnus II Pact to be my greatest political achievement, as no man is more intractable than your honored grandfather." Grinning, Senator Karakawa walks toward Autobot Headquarters as Optimus exits to meet him.

Turbo pinches the bridge of his nose.


Scene: 2

On a stretch of highway, Optimus drives; Senator Karakawa flies overhead in jet mode.

The two mechs stop and transform in a deserted area near the Oregon and California border, Senator Karakawa landing.

"So," drawls Optimus. "There's no chance in hell that I could convince you to rescind the Beta Cygnus II Pact."

"You would be correct," says Senator Karakawa, "though your fellow Air Raid, with a bit more experience, could be quite the diplomat."

Optimus chuckles. "He's friendly enough," he says, "but then: so is Skywarp-who basically sent you after me."

"It is true that Skywarp is part of the Cybertron Empire's diplomatic corps," says Senator Karakawa evenly.

"Skywarp's a charmer," says Optimus. "He gets everybody."

"He dislikes you very much," says Senator Karakawa.

"I murdered his bondmate," says Optimus. "Skywarp is within his rights to hate me. If our positions were reversed, and he had done anything to harm Elita," he continues, "I doubt that I would have been able to tolerate working as closely with him as he did with me during the Devilspawn incident."

Senator Karakawa touches his chin.

"It's a testament to his fundamental strength of character," continues Optimus, "and his dedication as a soldier-which prevents me from underestimating him."

"I see," says Senator Karakawa. "You have a peculiar gift of perception and analysis," he continues. "Given enough time, you could possibly sway Leader One to your side."

Optimus shakes his head. "He has made it clear that I burned him," he says.

"True," says Senator Karakawa, "but he is a Guardian. Leader One's first instinct is to protect Gobotron," he continues, "and if he believes aiding you will protect Gobotron, then he will overlook any injury you have done him."

"How will you convince him that siding with us won't protect Gobotron?" asks Optimus.

"I will not," says Senator Karakawa, frowning. "The Governor-general is adamant in his belief that the Cybertron Empire will invade Gobotron."

"I would be adamant as well," says Optimus, "about acknowledging facts: especially the fact that universal conquest is the 'Cybertron Empire's' stated goal."

"And Gobotron is clearly a small part of the universe," says Senator Karakawa wryly.

"As is Earth...and Cybertron," says Optimus soberly.

"Is it your responsibility," asks Senator Karakawa, "to shoulder such burdens?"

Optimus stares at Senator Karakawa.

"I would think the stress of ensuring the safety and peace of one planet is more than a single person-or even a single army-can bear," continues Senator Karakawa. "Surely your strength will fail beneath the weight of three planets-let alone the whole universe."

"Yet Megatron's strength can be trusted," says Optimus after a moment.

Senator Karakawa smiles, his expression thoughtful. "A worthy point, Optimus Prime," he says.

"I want to free him," says Optimus. "Megatron's obsession with power has driven him mad."

"Do you speak as yourself," asks Senator Karakawa, "or as Prime?"

"As Prime," says Optimus. "As myself: I just want to beat the scrap out of Megatron and see him lose. You're rather perceptive yourself, Senator."

"Borne out of envy, Optimus," says Senator Karakawa. "If I had a module with the memories of previous Head Senators which could give me advice on how to conduct my duties," he continues, "I'm certain that I could do a finer job."

"I and my legitimate predecessors think that it's more of a headache than it's worth," counters Optimus. "My immediate predecessor made rather questionable decisions during his tenure," he adds, "before and after he became Prime."

"And what of the fellow you don't consider legitimate," asks Senator Karakawa, "that one who constantly stated that he 'was created to be Prime'?"

"Unfortunately, I don't have the luxury of ignoring whatever input he may have-as it might be valuable," says Optimus. "I'd imagine that essentially having four distinct voices in my head offering guidance is not a mark of sanity in a leader. Your Governor-general is within his rights to distrust me."

"It's heartening to know that you're willing to consider advice from a multitude of sources," says Senator Karakawa. "Would you be kind enough," he asks, "to allow me to make an offer?"

Optimus nods.

"It's a simple thought exercise," continues Senator Karakawa, "as Earth's 'new year' approaches. Your philosophy," he adds, "is this: 'Freedom is the right of all sentient beings'. You are willing to fight, kill, and die in the name of freedom."

"Yes," says Optimus, conviction burning in his optics.

"Then define it," says Senator Karakawa.

"What?" balks Optimus, staring at Senator Karakawa.

"What is 'freedom'?" asks Senator Karakawa. "A concept this valuable should be defined clearly."

"It's self-evident," says Optimus tersely. "What you've asked of me is the equivalent of asking someone to write a mathematical proof of an axiom."

"Except no one will take and lose life," counters Senator Karakawa quietly, "in the name of mathematical axioms. You, as Prime," he continues, "ask many others to wage war in the name of freedom; thus, it's within reason for one to ask for a definition."

"Has Megatron clearly defined his philosophy?" asks Optimus.

Senator Karakawa nods. "'Everlasting peace is the end to all conflict, which can only be achieved when all are one: united under one rule, and governed by a single ruler'," he says, quoting a speech from Megatron.

"So: a perversion of the Cybertronian blessing, 'until all are one'," says Optimus.

"While the logic of Megatron's argument is grievously flawed, it is present; all would be united," says Senator Karakawa.

"Unity under the thrall of fear and visceral, simmering hate of a single tyrant," says Optimus, "is not peace. It's simply the calm before the storm: the great upheaval which would come to pass the moment Megatron dies."

Senator Karakawa touches his chin.

"I may not be able to define freedom, but I know it's better than Megatron's definition of peace," continues Optimus.

"You know," says Senator Karakawa. "Would you impose your knowledge of the superiority of your freedom over Megatron's peace...upon the whole of the universe?"

Optimus trembles, unable to answer.

"Please, consider that for me, and the other souls in the cosmos who await your answer to Megatron," says Senator Karakawa. He transforms, then leaves Optimus, heading towards Arizona.

Two Mold-45s emerge from a cloud bank, then silently follow Senator Karakawa.

Guardian Intelligence...is really on its A-game, says Optimus.


Scene: 3

January 1, 1989; 11:00 PM, Pacific Time.

This...is the final hour of peace, muses Optimus. Two words from me...could end nine M-cycles: nine million Earth years of strife, pain, torment, and death. Just two words...which would command the fate of billions across the universe, continues Optimus silently as he crouches.

Optimus observes the Aerialbots, Powerglide, and Skyfire as they land nearby, sighing as the seven jet mecha transform and walk towards Autobot Headquarters. He trembles as he notes a brief glance from Slingshot before the Aerialbot follows his wingmates inside the Ark.

I need guidance... Optimus says to himself. I know my answer, he continues, but do I have the right to speak for them? Or for the universe?

Fitor approaches Autobot Headquarters, transforms in midair, then lands in front of Optimus; he studies the Autobot leader.

Optimus clutches his head.

"The answer, fool, is 'yes'," says Fitor curtly after a moment.

Optimus staggers backward, staring at Fitor. "Whatever happened to basic pleasantries, like 'hello'?" he balks, rising to his feet.

"You know there is only one answer that you can give to Megatron," continues Fitor, "so I thought that I'd spare you the preamble and get to the point."

"I've spent a month struggling over this," says Optimus, "because I'm not Megatron. I don't believe my will is the will of the universe, or the many peoples in it."

"Then please," says Fitor, "allow me to summarize your hand-wringing. Your first impulse is to say 'no', and continue the war. Then Head Senator Karakawa gives you a call, applauding your overture of peace and urging you to consider Megatron's proposal in a 'different' light."

"What makes you think I don't agree with Senator Karakawa?" spits Optimus. "I'd kill for that guy's worst day."

"His worst day," says Fitor gravely, "was when a third party's alien war robbed him of his wife and his parents: the whole of his family except for his daughter. That tragedy," he continues soberly, "is what motivates all of his actions."

"It takes courage," says Optimus, "to seek peace in the face of destruction."

"And Karakawa is looking for peace in all the wrong places," counters Fitor.

"I have fought Megatron for nine M-cycles," says Optimus. "Has that brought us any closer to peace?"

"You say that," says Fitor, "but you can't even mouth the words Megatron wants to hear in the holomirror, can you?"

Optimus' optics widen.

"You're not the type who can fake it until it sticks, Optimus Prime," continues Fitor.

"If I sought this kind of advice," says Optimus, "I would have consulted Leader One."

"You sought my honest opinion of your dilemma," says Fitor, "and the one I voiced is simply an opinion I share with Leader One. Take it or leave it."

"I," says Optimus, a determined look in his optics.

Fitor folds his arms.

"Surrender," says Optimus after a moment, determination still on his face.

"Can you say those words, together, to Megatron?" asks Fitor. "And will those words," he continues, "truly bring peace if you do?" With that, Fitor takes off into the sky.


Scene: 4

Magneto plummets into a desert oasis, summoning an electromagnetic field to cushion his fall.

Storm descends to the ground. "Enough, Magneto," she says. "I don't doubt that you acted in self-defense," she continues, "but the sheer violence-*"

"Was warranted," counters Magneto. "I needed to make an example out of him, for daring to trifle with a mutant."

"I don't have time for your tribalistic nonsense!" spits Storm. "N'Jadaka had to be alive to answer for his crimes against Wakanda," she continues, "and you chose to kill him because he wasn't a mutant."

"Who is being more 'tribalist' than you?" sneers Magneto, a small smile on his lips.

Storm narrows her eyes.

"You would waste your gifts that Charles has helped you refine: power that caused your native tribe to revere you as a goddess," continues Magneto, gazing at Storm as he removes his helmet, "to defend the Wakandan due process rights of that fool?"

"I must-*" starts Storm.

"No more self-righteous hypocrisy, Miss Munroe. Were this Creed, or Stryker, or Hodge," asks Magneto, "would you even have wasted breath on them?"

"You're accusing me of something as pathetic and shallow as skin color prejudice!?" spits Storm.

"You dropped everything in your life for Wakanda: a country you know nothing about," says Magneto, "with laws alien to what you've known."

"So I should just let you go free?" asks Storm.

"Had I killed King T'Challa: your prospective consort," says Magneto, "for what was done to me, I would understand: I'd surrender, and be prepared to answer for my actions. But be honest!" he continues, his voice laced with contempt. "It's Killmonger! His family was exiled from Wakanda for consorting with HYDRA: the damned remnant of the Nazi regime that destroyed my family...and created me as the enemy you know."

"That wasn't N'Jadaka's choice-or the choice of his family," says Storm. "His father was kidnapped: forced to serve Klaw."

"Nor was T'Challa to blame for that misfortune," says Magneto, "nor was I ever a colonizer. I have no interest in Wakanda," he continues, "and were it not for your intended's nation sitting on large vibranium deposits, neither would anyone else give a shit."

Storm blinks; her eyes widen in shock.

"I'm not asking you to grant me any special courtesy as a mutant, Storm," says Magneto, "but the common courtesy that you'd grant any man who kills in self-defense."

Storm sighs, her expression neutral.

Magneto gazes into Storm's eyes; awe and curiosity soften his expression.

"What are you staring at?" asks Storm, unnerved.

"Tell me, Ororo," says Magneto. "What's it like to feel truly alive?"

"I don't understand..." says Storm.

"I've seen glimpses of the fire in your eyes-your whole being-during our battles," continues Magneto. "You're yourself when you fight for your beliefs: with the X-Men, and the Avengers."

Storm stares at Magneto.

Magneto pulls Storm to him with a magnetic field, drawing her close.

"What are you doing...?" wonders Storm.

Magneto releases Storm from the field...by widening the field to surround them both. "You have a luxury," he says, "that I want."

Confused, Storm starts to respond.

Magneto kisses Storm.

Storm trembles, even as she returns the kiss.


Scene: 5

Skywarp and Thundercracker observe a human religious ceremony.

"Which Earthian religion is this again?" asks Thundercracker blandly.

"Who cares?" scoffs Skywarp. "It's Monday morning."

"More to the point," says Thundercracker, "it's January 2nd, so the reprieve for the fleshbags is over."

"Technically, yeah," grins Skywarp, "at least here."

"I picked this small Middle Eastern fiefdom," says Thundercracker, "because it's energy-rich and it's not covered by the slaggin' treaty. The Guardians don't even know this country exists."

"Then let's get back to work, my friend," says Skywarp as he transforms to jet mode.

Thundercracker follows suit, then dives, preparing to strafe the small village.

Heatseeker and Mach-3 intercept the Decepticon jetwarriors, along with Small Foot.

Thundercracker transforms. "How did you get here!?" he balks.

Skywarp transforms, then scowls.

"I figured Thundercracker was being too honorable," says Small Foot, "so I followed him and relayed his movements to Guardian Intelligence."

"I never saw or detected you," glowers Thundercracker.

"To be fair," says Skywarp, "her faction emblem wouldn't be emblazoned on her body; she just looks like an ordinary Earthian pickup truck in her alt mode...which you'd never even give a second thought."

"So what?" snorts Thundercracker. "You think we're going to give up on that energy mother-lode because of the non-aggression treaty?"

"Not only that," says Small Foot, "but because of the US Embassy Building that has been there for twenty cycles."

"Yeah, that's true," drawls Skywarp, "but has this little sector requested Gobotron's aid against its enemies?"

Small Foot turns to Heatseeker and Mach-3, who shake their heads.

"Then the sector's fair game," quips Skywarp.

"Optimus hasn't even answered Megatron's terms!" spits Small Foot. "In Oregon, it's still January 1st and you know it."

"Look, it can't be helped that Earth's too primitive to have a single global time zone," sneers Thundercracker.

"Any further attempt to delay us from securing this sector's energy resources," says Skywarp, "will be interpreted as a violation of the non-aggression pact."

"The US Embassy Building, and all American citizens," says Small Foot, glaring at Skywarp, "will need to be evacuated."

Thundercracker starts to respond, but shuts his mouth after noting Skywarp's icy expression.

Skywarp gazes at the three Guardians. "You three have one hour to evacuate the Americans," he states. "Soundwave is monitoring the situation from Deceptibase, and will confirm who's an American national."

"Before you issue orders to us," counters Mach-3, "we need to contact our officers."

"Feel free," says Skywarp, "but the clock's ticking. And asylum seekers are not permitted."

"What will happen to the native inhabitants of this sector?" asks Small Foot evenly.

"That will depend on their government's cooperation with the demands of the Cybertron Empire," says Skywarp.

"Truthfully, Small Foot," radios Heatseeker, "you should have simply let these two frags invade."

"Then we'd have casus belli," adds Mach-3 via the same internal radio frequency.

"Negative," says Small Foot over internal radio. "It's a dereliction of our duty as Guardians to avoid making a genuine effort to enforce the treaty-and honor our commitment to our allies."

"But to honor the treaty basically means we'd be obeying Skywarp's orders here," fumes Mach-3.

"Oh," says Thundercracker, smirking at the trio of Guardians. "Don't contact the Autobots. Don't contact any off-world Autobot sympathizers."

"No end runs will be tolerated today," says Skywarp. "We need to secure this area for our objectives."

"Damn it," hisses Heatseeker through the internal radio. "I was about to radio Zeemon."

"Who would have informed Senator Nanatsuro," says Small Foot, "and our good senator would have informed one of his friends in the Autobots. We'll have to be smart about this."

"Let's focus on getting General Newcastle and the other UNECOM personnel out, along with the embassy building personnel," says Mach-3.

"We'll be hearing from some torqued Earthians," says Small Foot to Skywarp, giving Skywarp a thin smile. "I predict a surge of depth charges disrupting your rest cycle in your future."

Skywarp chuckles, returning the thin smile. "Cute, Trucksie," he says, "but you know that we both have jobs to do, and depth charges are less likely to kill me than Megatron will if I cross him again."

"Are you trying to say I owe you this one?" asks Small Foot.

Skywarp shakes his head. "I was thinking about the well-being of Cybertron when I took that shot," he says.

"Forgive my arrogance," says Small Foot, "and I'll forgive yours... Someday."

"Come on," says Skywarp. "We'll both be old zarkers who'll look back on days like this as the 'good old days'."

"Sir," says Small Foot, "Heatseeker, Mach, and I will be old. You and your annoying partner will be obsolete piles of rust."

"Speak for yourself, glitch," scoffs Thundercracker. "We jetwarriors know how to maintain ourselves."

"Let's just go," says Heatseeker. "If we've got to do something dirty and underhanded," he continues, scowling at the two Decepticons, "then it's best to get it done quickly."

The five mecha note eight Guardian shuttles in the sky, headed to the US Embassy building.

Nodding to Skywarp and Thundercracker, the three Guardians approach the lead Guardian shuttle.

After the trio of Guardians enter the lead shuttle, Thundercracker punches Skywarp's arm.

Skywarp stares at his wingmate.

"You knew she'd follow me, didn't you?" says Thundercracker.

"Because you're predictable," grins Skywarp. "Besides," he adds, "I'm the one who tipped her off in the first place."

"Why!?" balks Thundercracker. "You could have blown everything!"

"RECoN detail," says Skywarp. "Soundwave basically ordered me to feed her info."

"Isn't that frag still on light duty following that beating Megatron gave him?" asks Thundercracker.

"Soundwave's like that Inspector Gadget guy when it comes to his job: 'always on duty'," snorts Skywarp, doing a poor Don Adams impersonation.


Scene: 6

Slingshot brings Silverbolt into the mess hall at the Ark, twirling a pair of mag-lock cuffs.

"What are you planning with those?" asks Silverbolt, amused with Slingshot's antics. "You're in a giddy mood today."

"I had a bit too much fuel, Bolt-baby," says Slingshot, tracing Silverbolt's lip components with a finger. "I need to burn it off."

Silverbolt gently catches the finger between his dental chips, then sucks on it. "I can help you do that," he says as he releases Slingshot's finger, "but we need to be somewhere private."

"No. I gotta do it here. You scared?" asks Slingshot.

"Only that I might fuck you senseless in front of Huffer," scoffs Silverbolt. "His fuel pump can't handle that kind of excitement."

"You sure talk a good game, Silverbolt," says Slingshot, pulling Silverbolt into a deep kiss.

Huffer stares at the two kissing Aerialbots. "My fuel pump is still functional," he says to Warpath and Brawn, "but I'm going to...check the structural integrity of the bulkheads in the washracks." Huffer stands and leaves the mess hall.

"You do that," says Brawn. "Take care of yourself."

"We'll sit back and-ka-POW-enjoy the floor show," adds Warpath.

Bumblebee pokes Air Raid.

"What?" grins Air Raid drunkenly. "They're having a little fun."

"Hey, I don't have a problem with that," says Bumblebee. "I'm just worried that Skyfire will find out that you ganked his stash of high-grade."

"Whaddaya mean!?" says Skydive, loud and overenergized. "It's just a little high-grade."

"Slingshot drank a bit too much, though," chuckles Fireflight. "He's gonna have a killer hangover, and we're gonna laugh."

"Whoo! That's a big cable, guy!" says Slingshot, fondling Silverbolt's exposed input cable. "You wanna stick that into li'l ol' me?"

"Ride it, Slingshot!" says Silverbolt, drunk purely on his own lust. "Rub it, suck it-I don't care! Just fuck me already!"

"Raise your hands first," says Slingshot, licking Silverbolt's neck column. "Damn, you taste good."

"I'm even better inside you," hisses Silverbolt, raising his arms.

"Good...boy!" Slingshot crows as he mag-locks Silverbolt's arms to the wall with the cuffs.

"W...what!?" Silverbolt gasps, struggling against the cuffs.

Slingshot steps back. "Ha-ha! You thought I was going to let you take me for a ride, huh, big guy," he says, stroking Silverbolt's input cable.

"You glitch!" spits Silverbolt. "You will not leave me hanging with my fucking cable wide open!"

"Come on, guy: we're both good sports, right?" says Slingshot, grinding his hips into Silverbolt's.

"When I break these mag-locks, Slingshot," says Silverbolt, "I'll knock all of your little lights out."

"You'll have to catch me first, big-Bolt," grins Slingshot, gripping Silverbolt's input cable and stroking it faster. "When I get through overloadin' your aft," he continues, "you'll be too fraggin' spent to chase after me."

"I don't think so," counters Silverbolt. "I'll break these damn cu-*"

Slingshot steps back with a crude yet triumphant grin on his face. "I've gotta say, Silverbolt," he says, staring at the forming puddle of data stream-infused lubricant, "you've got a lot of spunk."

Air Raid, Fireflight, and Skydive stare at the overload-weakened Silverbolt and the delirious Slingshot a moment...then they laugh.

"Wow," says Bumblebee, watching as Slingshot skips merrily out of the mess hall.

Sunstreaker blushes, then stands. "You know what? I'll be in my bunk!" He leaves the mess hall.

Optimus enters the mess hall just as Silverbolt breaks free of the mag-lock cuffs.

Silverbolt faces Optimus' direction, a deranged smile on his face. "I'm coming for you, you hot little cable-tease!" he says crudely. "Just as soon...as I...take a nap." Silverbolt collapses at Optimus' feet.

"I won't even bother to ask," says Optimus. He steps around Silverbolt, obtains his energon rations, and leaves the mess hall.

Air Raid, Fireflight, and Skydive begin a fresh round of laughter.


Scene: 7

Skyfire enters his quarters in the Ark.

He notes that one of his storage lockers is ajar.

"I left that locked for a reason," he says aloud, opening the locker. "I hope no one found...damn it."

Skyfire reads the datapad left inside. "Droll. 'Hey, Skyfire! This is Air Raid. We Aerialbots don't like the fact that you tried to keep all of the good hooch to yourself, so we took it off your hands for ya.'"

Skyfire tosses the datapad back into the locker, then laughs. "That missive was date-stamped on yesterday," he says, "which means I should find them whining to Ratchet in med bay."

Skyfire exits his quarters, laughing.


Scene: 8

"What kind of fuel did you take in?" balks Ratchet.

"We had some killer high grade," says Air Raid, clutching his head.

"It was good stuff," adds Fireflight, "but I think it was too much for us."

"Silverbolt," Slingshot whines, "please tell Sludge to stop jumping on my head-I ain't playing the Interrogation Game with him today!"

"Slingshot...literally had too much of that high grade," says Skydive.

"Next question," says Ratchet, irritated. "Where did you find this high grade?"

Skyfire hums, grinning as he enters med bay.

"It was in Skyfire's room," says Air Raid. "We were poking around and we found it."

"What you found was high-grade fuel that only deep-space mechs can process properly," says Skyfire, his grin widening. "That high grade was not for jetwarriors."

"That was Valk fuel I had?" groans Slingshot. "Why didn't you mooks tell me!?"

"I did tell you," says Skydive. "That's why the rest of us were drinking out of small cubes."

"You said you could handle a little high-grade," scoffs Air Raid.

"Normal high-grade, Raid-not fraggin' super-jet fuel!" spits Slingshot. "Did I beat your stupid dare?"

"Yep. You kissed Silverbolt," says Fireflight quickly.

Slingshot stares at his wingmates. "What else did I do!?" he asks.

"You'd have to ask Silver-*" Air Raid is silenced by Skydive.

"Don't ask Silverbolt. In fact, just stay out of his way for a few days," says Skydive.

"I torqued him that bad, huh?" says Slingshot.

"Just take these and head to the barracks, big-shot," says Ratchet, handing Slingshot a set of pain-dampener chips. "You're relieved of duty until your systems return to normal."

"Yes, sir," Slingshot grunts, rubbing his forehead as he exits med bay.

"I somehow missed whatever chaos you caused last night," says Skyfire.

Silverbolt enters med bay. "I just saw Slingshot leave med bay," he states calmly. "Where is he headed?"

Skydive grabs Ratchet and throws him into Wheeljack's lab, locking the door. "I don't know," he says.

"Beats me," adds Air Raid as he and Fireflight shrug. "We have hangovers, so go fly a sortie or something."

Silverbolt smiles thinly at his wingmates, then turns to Skyfire. "Do you know where he went, Skyfire?" he asks.

Skyfire smirks at the trio of panicking jetwarriors. "Ratchet ordered Slingshot to head to your unit's barracks," he says to Silverbolt.

"Thank you, Skyfire," says Silverbolt.

"Aw, come on, Silverbolt," groans Air Raid. "Slingshot was hopped up on Skyfire's super-high grade."

"Oh, I know he was drunk off his aft," says Silverbolt blandly.

"And he had too much of it," adds Fireflight. "That's why he was out of control."

"He's got an industrial-grade hangover," says Skydive dourly.

"Then I'll just have to kiss him to make it all better," says Silverbolt, laughing deviously as he exits med bay.

"Decepticons are less evil than that guy sometimes," says Air Raid.

"And you're no better," adds Fireflight to Skyfire.

"Stay out of my high grade," says Skyfire. "Besides, I was a Decepticon once."


Scene: 9

"Where did you think you were going!?" demands Cliffjumper, rushing to Sludge at the ocean's edge as the Dinobot lands on the beach near Deceptibase.

Scowling, Sludge picks Cliffjumper up. "Me Sludge go," he says slowly, "where me am want to go. You Cliffjumper were try to stop me?" he adds with a crude grin.

Brawn approaches the pair. "Come on, big guy," he says, "Please put him down."

Sludge shrugs. "Since you am say 'please'," he says; Sludge then flings Cliffjumper behind him into the ocean.

"Really!?" balks Brawn.

"You no am ask me to be gentle," says Sludge, "and me no like Cliffjumper much anyway."

"Now you're just being an aft port," says Brawn.

"Him am full of scrap," says Sludge, "so if me Sludge am aft port, then me am perform function and eject scrap."

Brawn sighs. "Why were you in Deceptibase," he asks, "if I can ask you that?"

"You am already ask," says Sludge. "No problem for me Sludge to answer you."

Brawn nods.

"Me am talk to Soundwave," Sludge continues. "Him injured by Megatron."

"So...?" wonders Brawn.

"Me try to tell Soundwave to leave Megatron," says Sludge, "because Megatron am bad leader. And also to get him Soundwave to convince other Decepticons to leave, too."

Brawn touches his chin. "While that would solve a lot of our problems," he grins, "I don't think Soundwave would accept your argument."

Cliffjumper resurfaces, then approaches Sludge and Brawn.

"You am right," says Sludge, frowning. "No am even ask him Soundwave to join Autobots-because sometimes me Sludge no am want to be Autobot," he continues. "Just ask him to leave war. But him say: 'Logic: flawed.'"

"What does he know, anyway?" says Brawn. "He's the one who's stuck with the bad leader."

"Him and other Decepticons only need to leave, and Megatron alone," says Sludge, a bewildered expression on his face. "No can fight war without army."

"So you weren't turning traitor," says Cliffjumper.

"No more than you Cliffjumper am," snorts Sludge, walking away with a mirthless smile on his face.

Cliffjumper stares at Sludge.

Brawn slaps the back of Cliffjumper's head. "Jack-aft!" he spits. "He can get away with being stupid because he's a little under five cycles old," Brawn continues. "What's your fraggin' excuse?"

"He and the other Dinobots have left us in the past," says Cliffjumper, glowering at the ground.

"I think you've systematically accused about thirty percent of the Autobots in our unit of treason," scoffs Brawn, "including me."

"You did go off after that Vengeance character," says Cliffjumper.

"I followed the guy," says Brawn, "because he had showed up when Optimus disappeared. When I tracked Vengeance down, I was able to locate Optimus," he continues, "and we got rid of Vengeance together."

"You can think I'm stupid all you want," sneers Cliffjumper. "I ain't ever getting burned by Decepticon-builds again," he adds, "and I'll always be watching."

"Then do us both a favor, C. J.," says Brawn, "and start by looking in the mirror."

Cliffjumper stares at Brawn.

"I know it's been a while," Brawn continues, "but our models are only nine versions removed from Megatron themselves." He transforms and drives away.

Cliffjumper thinks a moment, then fumes; he transforms and follows Brawn. "Our Militron models ain't got nothin' to do with bein' a fraggin' Decepticon!" he spits.

"What about the Dinobots?" asks Brawn. "Or the Aerialbots? Or Ratchet?"

"Ratchet's a hybrid for obvious reasons," says Cliffjumper, "and we can't forget what his sister did to us."

"I haven't forgotten that," says Brawn. "I also haven't forgotten what we did to ourselves."

"What's that supposed to mean?" asks Cliffjumper.

"I haven't forgiven you," says Brawn, cold, "for what you did to our comrade Kite."

"I didn't do anything to her!" counters Cliffjumper hotly.

"But you let some other afts do what they wanted to her," seethes Brawn, "while you were tooling off to it."

"She was getting too close to the enemy," stammers Cliffjumper. "Kite had to be taught a lesson."

Brawn speeds away; Cliffjumper races to keep up with him.

Brawn and Cliffjumper arrive in front of Autobot Headquarters; they transform.

"Your efforts," says Brawn after a moment of unnerving silence.

"Efforts?" asks Cliffjumper.

"To teach Kite a lesson. Think that might be the reason why Sludge couldn't sway Soundwave?" asks Brawn. He enters the Ark without another word.

Cliffjumper, hurt, stares at the door to the Ark a moment, then transforms and drives off.


Scene: 10

Skyfire enters Autobot Headquarters, running into Air Raid.

"Dude," says Air Raid, "why don't you just stay here?"

"I'm not an Autobot anymore, remember?" says Skyfire. "I'm just picking up the last of my things-including what's left of my high-grade."

"What's stopping you from being an Autobot?" asks Air Raid.

"It's complicated," says Skyfire.

"That's because you're a science nerd," says Air Raid, "and so everything has to be complicated."

Air Raid's almost as bad as Skywarp, Skyfire sighs to himself. "Haven't you questioned anything about this war?" he asks.

"Not really," says Air Raid. "I've been an Autobot my whole life," he continues, "and the Decepticons-as much as I kind of like some of them-are the bad guys. No need to overthink it."

I'm not being fair; Air Raid's only naive, Skyfire muses. "Which Decepticons do you like?" he asks aloud.

"I don't have any grudges with them beyond the whole 'they tried to kill us' bit," says Air Raid, shrugging. "I think that if we weren't fighting each other, we'd be buddies. Especially Skywarp-that guy's funny."

"If you have a high tolerance for willful stupidity, perhaps," mutters Skyfire.

"Ah, he's not that dumb," scoffs Air Raid. "He's just devoted to what he believes in."

"Is that so?" says Skyfire.

"Yeah," says Air Raid. "Skywarp's not nearly as ideologically dense as our special friend Cliffjumper."

"As I have actually worked with Skywarp," says Skyfire, grinning crudely, "let me set you straight. Starscream sees my defection as a personal betrayal, and he hates me for that reason. Logical and fair, if regrettable. Skywarp believes I have betrayed the Cause, and hates me more than Starscream does."

"No, dude: it's because from where Skywarp sits as an Arwing," says Air Raid, "you stabbed his wingmate in the back. That's something you don't do."

"I never understood that," says Skyfire, shaking his head. "Starscream and Skywarp don't even like each other."

"Wingmates are wingmates," says Air Raid. "The terrible trio may hate each other's internals," he continues, "but when some clown from outside attacks any one of them, they'll close ranks in a second."

Skyfire strokes his chin in thought.

"It's just the way we're wired," Air Raid continues. "You hurt Starscream; Skywarp hates you forever."

"I had good reasons," says Skyfire.

"Skywarp don't care about no reasons," quips Air Raid. "No point in letting it bother you, man: just move on." Air Raid pats Skyfire's shoulder, then leaves.

Skyfire sighs, then heads to his old quarters for the last time.


Scene: 11

In the Aerialbots' barracks, Skydive reads a datapad.

"Skydive," says Silverbolt, "I need a team status report."

"I gave you one an hour ago," says Skydive, not looking up from his datapad.

"I need a substantive status report," says Silverbolt, snatching away the datapad, "so I can do my job."

"I didn't want to be redundant," says Skydive, scowling. "You have functioning audios and optics."

"Why are you in such a surly mood today?" asks Silverbolt.

Skydive gives Silverbolt a sour smile. "I'm stuck in an air unit with a guy who wants to emulate a fragging Freight Hauler," he says. "There's a little red robot troll outside these barracks who spews accusations of treason at anything with wings."

"Fuck Cliffjumper," scoffs Silverbolt. "He probably thinks Optimus and Bumblebee will join the Decepticons this week."

"We need Skyfire back!" spits Skydive. "He's intelligent, and he can speak their language," he continues, pointing to the door leading outside the barracks.

"What does Skyfire's departure have to do with us?" asks Silverbolt evenly.

"Everything," says Skydive. "You can't be a mediator between us and the Autobots and our wingleader at the same time. Skyfire can take some of the pressure off because the Autobots trust him."

Silverbolt stares at Skydive. "We are Autobots. We don't need a mediator," he says, tense.

"We're Autobot jetwarriors, Silverbolt. We need someone that can grok 'ground vehicle'," says Skydive. "Powerglide won't cut it."

"What are you talking about?" balks Silverbolt. "Powerglide 'speaks ground vehicle' just fine."

"Powerglide's a skilled pilot," says Skydive, "but he has no gravitas whatsoever."

"What would you like me to do?" asks Silverbolt.

"Get Skyfire back with us," says Skydive, glum. "I want a chess partner worthy of me."

"Go play with Heatseeker," quips Silverbolt. "He's still happily offering a rematch."

"That Gobot can burn in the Pit," says Skydive.

Silverbolt pats Skydive's shoulder, then leaves the barracks.


Scene: 12

Skywarp enters Soundwave's quarters, walks over to Soundwave's workstation as Soundwave monitors an Earthian news feed, and spins Soundwave's chair around so that Soundwave faces him.

Soundwave studies Skywarp.

Skywarp removes his arm-mounted rifles.

"Assisted-suicide: inadvisable," states Soundwave after a moment.

Skywarp scowls. "Would you give me a chance to make the request first before reading my fraggin' brain waves!?" he spits.

"Brain scan: unnecessary," says Soundwave. "Own thoughts: identical."

"What?" sneers Skywarp. "Sludge's offer was actually sounding good to you?"

Soundwave tilts his head.

"You don't have to deny it, sir," continues Skywarp. "You can tell I've actually been trying to think."

Soundwave nods.

"I shouldn't trust you with any of this, of course," Skywarp adds wryly, "because I know that it will be used against me."

"Concern: non-existent," says Soundwave. "Frustration: evident."

"I'm sick of being the bad guy," says Skywarp. "I'm sick of the zarkin' humans and their depth charges-you know they're targeting near my quarters now, right?"

"Affirmative," says Soundwave.

"At the same time," says Skywarp, "where the hell can I go?"

"Gobotron," says Soundwave.

"Where Small Foot will, in her present frame of mind, be more than happy to grant my death wish. Thanks a fraggin' heap," says Skywarp sardonically.

Soundwave touches his chin.

"Not to worry: I ain't so far gone that I want to throw in my lot with Skyfrag and Optimus," says Skywarp. "Turning my back on the Cause is one thing; turning my back on my wingmates and my bondmate," he continues, touching his left ring knuckle, "is another."

Soundwave gazes at Skywarp. "Visit to Skywing's bondmate required," he states.

"Visit my grandma?" wonders Skywarp. "What kind of deranged order is that?"

"Hero's welcome: likely," says Soundwave.

Skywarp shrugs. "She has a higher opinion of Megatron than I do right now," he says. "Maybe it will do me some good...not that you care about things like that. This probably is part of a master plan."

"Objective: prevent alliance between Gobotron and Shouri-sei," says Soundwave.

"You keep giving out this scrap in bits and pieces," says Skywarp, annoyed. "I'm sure you've got my personnel file," he continues, "so you know I'm poorly-equipped to keep up with you."

"Information confers knowledge, which is power," says Soundwave. "Control information flow: control power."

"Unless a certain manifestation of this power," notes Skywarp, tapping Soundwave's head, "doesn't like being controlled."

"Acknowledged," says Soundwave. "Actions: necessary."

"Maybe for the Cause," says Skywarp, "but what about you? What do you gain out of this?" he asks, staring at Soundwave.

Soundwave gazes at Skywarp.

"Everybody in this zarkin' army has a reason they can't just walk away-Megatron included," continues Skywarp. "Everyone except you and the crew in your chest compartment. You can walk away right now."

"Negative," states Soundwave.

"Why can't you just walk away!?" balks Skywarp. "The only mechs who like you in this outfit are all related to you," he continues, "and you can't lump me in that list because if I have to choose between you and the Screamer, you know I'd pick Starscream every time."

"Irrelevant," says Soundwave.

"You're not the type of mech to be motivated by revenge," continues Skywarp, "or I'd be even less-likely to trust you: because you're smart enough to realize that Megatron's hands aren't clean regarding the conditions that gave us this frag-pile of a war."

"Regarding CDF operative Kite?" asks Soundwave.

"Yeah," says Skywarp, "and there's also your prime creator to consider. Hackwrench should never have had to deal with the scrap she did," he adds, "and you probably wanted to continue doing battle with your slaggin' mom as your opponent..." Skywarp scowls.

"Query: state issue," says Soundwave.

"You don't make any fraggin' sense," says Skywarp, glowering at Soundwave.

"My intent," says Soundwave, standing and leaning into Skywarp's face, "is to secure victory for Cybertron: via planned obsolescence."

"Of what?" asks Skywarp.

"Suggestion: correction of query string," says Soundwave. "Recommendation: 'of whom'."

Skywarp raises an optic ridge.

"I thought it was clear that the ideal outcome of this war," continues Soundwave, "would render Megatron and his tactics irrelevant."

"I...don't quite grok you, Soundwave," says Skywarp. "I'll stick to following orders-if for no other reason than to stay the hell out of your way." Skywarp leaves.


Scene: 13

"I can dream, can't I, Graydon?" Sparkplug asks his guest: a chestnut brown-haired man.

The man, Graydon, raises an eyebrow.

"That-compared to the threat from the Decepticons: alien invaders like we saw in the movies when we were kids," Sparkplug continues, "we can put aside our stupid, superficial differences."

"The Autobots can and have expressed their willingness to deal with the malcontents of their own kind," says Graydon. "I believe that we should deal with ours."

Sparkplug grins. "We're making progress," he says. "'They' are 'ours'."

Graydon snorts. "I see your facile point, Ron," he says, "but you are the only soul who knows why I refuse to make that next step that you want."

"Love is the only way out," says Sparkplug. "We're human beings. You hate your dormant X-gene," he quips, "and I hate my male pattern baldness."

"Your receding hairline isn't an existential threat to the human race," snarls Graydon quietly.

"Attitudes like yours basically create the very enemy you fear: mutant supremacists," counters Sparkplug.

Spike shakes his head. Dad, he sighs silently, why do you keep wasting your time trying with this asshole? Men like Creed can't be reasoned with.

"Magneto's ilk want to rule over us as Homo superior," spits Graydon, "when they're just deviant aberrations of the natural design..."

I have to be reasonable, Spike continues, watching as Sparkplug continues his civil argument with Graydon. The Autobots aren't much better in that department: when it comes to fliers.

"Okay, listen," says Sparkplug. "If either of my sons were mutants, they'd still be my sons. Maybe you ought to try putting yourself out there."

"No," mutters Spike. "We don't have any shortage of bigots here on Earth," he continues, locking eyes with Graydon, "and we don't need any more of you to breed."

"That in itself," says Graydon, "is a bigoted mindset, Sam; you can't tolerate memes that disgust your own narrow sense of morality."

"Persistent ideas that spread like a virus," says Sparkplug. "Since bigotry isn't an inherited trait-unlike my male pattern baldness that I hope you didn't get stuck with, son," he continues with a grin, "I figure that I, at least, can cure this jackass that saved my life back in Vietnam: with an antiviral meme."

Spike grimaces. "Dad," he says, "your old war buddy incites violence against innocent people."

"That's a matter of opinion," says Graydon. "We both have the right to express our honest opinions."

Sparkplug gives Graydon a thin smile. "You didn't answer my suggestion," he says.

"To 'put myself out there'," says Graydon. "My reasons for voluntary celibacy," he continues, "have less to do with Sam's concerns about the possible Lamarckian evolution of my beliefs, and more to do with what amounts-in my view-to the nastiest STD this world's ever seen: which I've been carrying since birth."

Mr. Creed probably goes through a lot of tube socks, muses Spike.

"Graydon," says Sparkplug, "if you're making that stupid analogy, then the whole human race has been carrying your idea of AIDS: since at least the nineteenth century."

"Longer, actually," says Graydon. "It's just that in the past, we were less-tolerant of people with harmful birth defects."

"See?" grins Sparkplug. "Progress."

Three sharp knocks sound on the door to Spike's house.

"Come in, Carly; it's open," says Spike.

"Your friends have special knocks?" wonders Graydon.

Carly enters.

Graydon stares at Carly; his eyes scan up and down.

Carly stares back at Graydon, rubbing her arms.

"Carly...?" asks Spike. "Have you met Mr. Creed, or do you know about his group?"

"We've never met: face-to-face," says Carly. "It's got nothing to do with his anti-mutant club, though: to be fair." She blushes.

Graydon trembles briefly; he squares his shoulders, then looks away from Carly, shame in his eyes.

"Soundwave...?" whispers Spike.

Carly nods curtly.

"He's a sick fuck," says Spike.

"Let me guess: to get this shit out in the open," says Sparkplug. "The Decepticons kidnapped you for some twisted experiment: right, Graydon?"

"I was a 'specimen'," says Graydon. "That young lady-Carly's your name?" he continues, smiling briefly as Carly nods. "Anyway, that was about four or five years ago."

"I was their captive because I wanted to infiltrate their ship: to help Ironhide," says Carly.

"I was jogging outside my rental apartment in Portland when one of the Decepticons' robo-buzzards abducted me," says Graydon. "What they did to me was all in my mind," he continues, tensing his fists.

Sparkplug exposes his neck, showing a faint burn scar. "Did I tell you about the hypno-chip, Graydon?" he asks quietly.

"You did mention those bastards brainwashing you," says Graydon.

"Megatron damn-near killed me," says Spike. "Dad put my mind inside the body of a robot he kitbashed to give my body a chance to heal at the hospital, but..."

"You probably saw a Frankenstein movie and lost it," says Graydon.

"It gets worse," says Spike. "Megatron tried to recruit me," he snorts, "and in my brain fog, I accepted."

Sparkplug smiles. "It will never compare to you nearly being an accessory to the Juggernaut's bank robbery," he teases, glancing at a photo of himself with other soldiers.

"Dad, one: I was nine," says Spike. "Two," he adds, poking at the largest of the soldiers in Sparkplug's photo, "apparently, Mr. Marko needed the cash."

"Who the hell was going to stop him-the cops!?" balks Sparkplug. "Luckily, we were able to punt that one to the X-Men."

Carly laughs. "Was this back when you were in New York City?" she asks.

"Yeah," says Sparkplug. He studies Graydon.

Graydon gazes at Carly; he shudders, then sits up straight.

Yeah, Spike, says Sparkplug to himself, placing a hand on Graydon's shoulder, Soundwave's a sick bastard who decided to fuck with the mind of my fucked-in-the-head brother-in-arms.

Graydon stands. "Let me introduce myself properly, miss," he says, presenting his hand. "Graydon Creed."

Carly shakes Graydon's hand. "Carly Banas," she says, "the girl in the swimsuit that the Decepticons wanted to drown."

"I'm relieved," says Graydon, still holding Carly's hand, "that you made it out okay."

"Yeah," says Carly. "Had to deal with some angry military guys, though."

"Navy?" asks Graydon.

"Yes, along with the Army," says Carly. "Chief Delgado from the Navy, she continues, "and from the Army: Sergeant Hauser and Sergeant Sneeden-a rude asshole."

"Sounds like Clayton's people," muses Graydon.

"'Clayton...'?" asks Carly.

"General Abernathy," says Graydon. "He's the senior field commander of a US Special Forces unit that pulls in expert personnel from all of our military branches. Especially that asshole Sneeden," he adds with a grin. "He's very serious about his job-which you likely undermined."

"That's what they said," says Spike dourly.

"Abernathy's team is very capable," says Graydon. "Delgado got me out-despite him not liking me."

"I think Chief Delgado has good reason not to like you," says Spike, "as do most fair-minded Americans."

"No; we're not rehashing that, Spike," says Sparkplug. "Neither of you will change your mind."

"Dad, I'm right," says Spike.

"I know," says Sparkplug. "Both of you are human," he continues, "and are people I care about."

Graydon studies Carly, looking into her eyes. His thumb glides along the back of Carly's hand: still in his.

"There's...an expert in what you experienced," says Carly quietly, glancing at Sparkplug's photo, "but given your beliefs, you probably don't want to talk to him."

"It would be difficult," says Graydon. "I'd...stomach it if I absolutely had to," he continues, "but..." He blinks at Carly. "Can you drive?" he asks, releasing Carly's hand.

"I've got my license," says Carly.

"What college accepted you, Carly?" asks Graydon.

"MIT," says Carly. "I'm in the middle of my Master's."

"Did you take AP in high school," wonders Graydon, "or start college early as a young genius?"

"Started college at sixteen," says Carly. "Took all of the AP courses during my freshman year of high school-along with both placement tests."

"She's legal, Graydon, but you're still old enough to be her father," says Sparkplug wryly. "Take it easy."

Graydon gives Sparkplug a thin smile. "I'd like to talk with you, over lunch," he says to Carly, "and it has nothing to do with the Friends..."


Scene: 14

"Hey," says Delgado, "at least he asked her out."

"Miss Banas is too young to be asked out by Mr. Creed," scowls Abernathy. "Whose sick idea was this?"

Sneeden and Katzenbogen gaze at Victor: a tall blond with amber-brown eyes.

Victor puts out his cigar after blowing smoke in Sneeden's face. "My shit government and yours wants this Friends of Humanity bullshit settled," he sneers, giving Abernathy a toothy, feral grin. "I have two ways of settling bullshit from people like Graydon," Victor continues, "but I get paid more if I settle him nonviolently."

"Despite Creed's ties to violent hate groups," says Sneeden coolly, "we don't want him killed: especially by another Creed."

"Exactly," says Victor, "though it wouldn't be my first time that I've killed or mauled my family. Having Graydon bust his nut inside the girl will help him settle all of his wannabe Nazi anti-mutant shit."

"This is insane," mutters Delgado.

"He ain't a monk," counters Victor, "so there ain't a damn reason for him not to fuck."

Sneeden opens a folder, reviewing his contents.

"What'cha readin', Sneeden?" asks Victor.

"Intel brief on our subject," says Sneeden.

Victor laughs crudely. "Worst-case scenario is that the little jackass finally makes me a grandfather," he says, a canny look in his eyes.

"Got any other kids out there who hate your guts?" asks Delgado.

Victor pouts, the expression almost childlike. "No. Graydon's it. I have yet to sniff out the bitch I knocked up to make him."

"That had to happen in the 1940s," says Sneeden, furrowing his brow.

"Now I'm remembering," sighs Victor. "She called herself Leni: Leni Zauber..."

"German spy," says Abernathy. "Except Zauber was recorded as KIA by German forces."

"So Creed's mother was a disguise artist, like a few ladies we know," says Delgado.

"Or a shapeshifter," says Sneeden, cool.


Scene: 15

After checking his ion rifle with a neutral Class Five, Ultra Magnus approaches Skywarp.

Skywarp grins, nodding at Ultra Magnus as he slurps a spark muscadine.

Ultra Magnus stares at Skywarp. "Don't those have...?" he asks.

"They're seedless," says Skywarp. "Cultivated on Shouri-sei."

"Ah. May I join you?" asks Ultra Magnus.

"Sure," says Skywarp.

Ultra Magnus sits across from Skywarp.

"I'm paying a visit to my grandma's house," says Skywarp, "for the record. Don't want the old Sovereign picking sides in our fight."

"Our last contact with the Sovereign," says Ultra Magnus, "indicates that she thinks both of our factions can go straight to the Pit."

"I know," says Skywarp. "She likes us both more ever since she saw Nova Prime fragged on live video." He nods to Jameson, studying a tray of alien hors-d'oeuvres.

"I hope none of it's toxic to him," muses Ultra Magnus.

"Bah," scoffs Skywarp. "I'd bet it ain't half as deadly as the scrap he eats back home."

"It depends on the restaurant," says Jameson, catching Skywarp's barb. "Anyway, I don't think the people on Shouri-sei want to murder the man who caught that maniac's death on tape."

"I suppose we're in Earth's debt, then," says Ultra Magnus, plucking a muscadine out of its serving disc.

Frowning, Skywarp follows suit.


Scene: 16

Mystique touches a headstone, marked TREVOR CHASE. Trevor... she says to herself, fighting back tears.

A tall blond wearing mirrored sunglasses in a Friends of Humanity paramilitary uniform puts a muddy boot onto another headstone next to Trevor's: marked IRENE ADLER, then lights a cigar. "Two down," he crows quietly, "one freak job to go."

Mystique narrows her eyes. "Go fuck yourself, Victor," she says in German.

"Aw, you missed me," sneers the blond: Victor; he takes a drag from his cigar, then puts the cigar out on Irene's headstone. "Our boy gave us a great show. I was the guy eating popcorn: nine years ago that day; you were too busy threatening to send our kid to hell."

"You just stood there," says Mystique, "and watched as a bunch of thugs beat my son to within an inch of his life."

"My revenge," says Victor, snatching off his sunglasses as he draws close to Mystique, "for not telling me about Graydon in the first place."

"I didn't know!" hisses Mystique. "I thought he had died," she continues, "and at this point I wish I'd aborted him!"

"I'm supposed to believe you," scoffs Victor, "considering how often you lie?"

"HYDRA caught me," says Mystique. "Found the real Zauber's body."

Victor gives Mystique a skeptical look.

"What the fuck do you want from me!?" demands Mystique.

"Proof," says Victor.

"I could fake any physical evidence I needed," says Mystique.

Victor smiles. "Maybe," he says with a shrug. "I want to see how far you'll go with your act," he continues, a wild glint in his eyes, "to get me to trust you."

"They electrocuted me," says Mystique, removing her white shroud. "Burned me. Unlike you, my skin actually scars."

Victor looks over Mystique's naked form, his expression cool.

Mystique scowls as her eyes narrow.

Victor drops to his haunches; his eyes widen as he gently examines Mystique.

Mystique curls her fists. "Get on with it...!" she seethes.

"Good girl," says Victor, giving Mystique's clitoris a chaste lick before standing; he touches her chin. "You oughta tell the truth more often," he continues, backing away as Mystique redons her shroud.

"I don't have to lie about HYDRA to anyone, you stupid ass," spits Mystique. "What would I stand to gain from lying about torture from the Red Skull...to you?"

"Nothin'," says Victor. "I wanted to see if you'd trust somebody else-besides your blind cunt of a dead wife, of course."

"At least you acknowledged her as my wife," says Mystique. "Had enough fun yet?"

"Never," grins Victor. "Graydon's in Oregon. He's got some lady trouble: the good kind."

Mystique arches an eyebrow.

"Canada and the US want me to help him out: so he'll quit being an ass to the rest of us 'muties'," continues Victor, "but I ain't one for subtlety."

"Then play to your strengths," sneers Mystique. "Kidnap them: Graydon and the Banas girl-*"

"You bitch," says Victor. "US or Canada?"

"G7," says Mystique. "They paid me enough money to let Graydon live," she continues, "but not enough to let him back in."

Victor laughs.

"I did my forty weeks of his kicking bullshit," Mystique adds, smiling as her hand briefly hovers over her belly.

"Shouldn't have left him," says Victor. "Or 'Kurt'."

"I had no fucking choice with Kurt!" snarls Mystique. "He and I were facing a damned mob with literal torches and pitchforks! He's alive, isn't he!?"

"Yeah, he's alive," says Victor. "He and your adopted girl saved your ass from Graydon, remember?"

"Rogue finally started hating me from that day forward," says Mystique. "Not the asshole who had his goons kick Trevor's face in, but me!"

"Because you ditched Graydon, threw Kurt into a waterfall, and used 'l'il Anna-Marie' to suck up Ms. Marvel-bitch's powers," says Victor, laughing. "I'm pointed at most of my enemies-except Logan: 'cause I like fucking with him," he adds, "but you? You create your enemies!"

"I've never been in the habit of fucking my enemies or my children," sneers Mystique, "so regarding Graydon: he's your damn problem. Take him and the girl to your grandfather's backwoods cabin in Alberta, drug them, and keep them there until nature takes its course."

"...ain't doable," says Victor.

"Twist Xavier's arm and make him scramble their brains-like he does with his precious students," says Mystique. "Canada can't throw you under the bus if all they see are good results."

"It ain't doable," Victor says, putting his hands on Mystique's shoulders, "'cause he's freaky like us. Roofies won't work on 'im."

"The stupid bastard's X-gene is inert!" counters Mystique. "I had Graydon tested for five years: from ten to fifteen."

"Graydon's been hearing bullshit from normals for his whole fucking life: that mutants are the scum of the earth and should all die," says Victor. "You're smarter than me," he continues, "so what would a guy with a mix of your shapeshiftin' and my healin' do to keep himself alive?"

"If he has my power," says Mystique, "then he'd have it from birth: my skin. How has he been holding his shape for so long?"

"Yours and mine," says Victor, grinning. "That's how he beat HYDRA and tricked ya. He's been foolin' himself all these years," he continues with a chuckle, "thinkin' his X-gene's inert."

"I wonder what will happen when he learns the truth..." muses Mystique.

"Will you forgive him?" asks Victor.

Mystique studies Trevor and Irene's headstones. "I'm still debating whether to let myself forgive him," she says, "or wait until I can shit on his grave."

"Our boy feels the same about you," says Victor, "and you might beat him to hell."

"Then I'll see Graydon there," says Mystique. "Until then, if you want him alive," she continues, "use drugs." She walks away from the two graves.

Victor lights his cigar, then leaves the graves, heading in an opposite direction.

END SPECIAL ONE