Remaining Competitors:

Veterans Falcons: Cody, Ella, Ezekiel, Harold, Justin, Izzy, LeShawna, Lindsay, "Robot", Shawn, Sky, Sugar, Topher

Newbies Birdies: Anne Maria, B, Brick, Cameron, Dakota, Dawn, Jo, Lightning, Mike, Sam, Scott, Staci, Zoey


(Recaping while shown flashback)

Chris: "Last time on Total Drama: Madness!"

--

Chris: "I will be bringing back 13 non-winning TD contestants to fight the most dangerous, and challenging, competition for a million dollars ever!"

--

LeShawna: (spitting out a starfish) "I'm NOT your friend"

--

Sky: "So the interns from last season are coming back?"

--

Chris: "We are taking them back to compete for real"

--

Chris: "I'm dividing you into teams based on the theme of the season, Veterans VS. Newbies!"

--

Scott/Sky/Topher: (scared) "Fang!"

--

Chris: "Find out when we get back, in Total! Drama! Madness!"

(Theme Song plays)


(In the episode it starts at the cliff, where all the contestants except Ella and Jo were ready, except Scott, who is trembling with fear, while the unmutated sharks jump out of the water threateningly)

Chris: To your positions, people! It's time to dive!

Scott: (pushes Anne Maria forward, giggling) "A-after you, I insist!"

Chris: (next to a TV) "All of this year's challenges are a nod to the classics of the past, but with some tough new twists to make this the toughest Total Drama season ever! Your first challenge? Find the key to the spa hotel and you'll do it in an homage to Total Drama's first challenge, jumping off the cliff and diving into pamelic shark-infested waters."

(Scott swallows in fear)


Confessional

Scott: (Falling in the fetal position and trembling with fear) "Ooh... Ok, maybe I have a sh-sh-shark phobia... Can you blame me? I was one of Fang's favorites, and just for taking your stupid tooth!"

(A flashback from last year is shown, where Scott dressed as an intern walks through the woods and sees a shark's tooth.)

Scott: "Awesome" (picks up the tooth, but then turns around and sees Fang growling at him, he screams in fear as he runs and Fang chases after him)

(Back to Scott in the confessional)

Scott: "I was in a trauma chair after that" (gulps) "B-but he's still chase me!"

End Confessional


Chris: (Gestures to the monitor, as Chef kicks an intern off the cliff, sending him into the water, swims to get the key, and returns to the hotel) Once you get into the water, try to avoid the sharks long enough to grab a key, and choose wisely, only one of those is the real key, assuming you live long enough to make it to dry land, a teammate will drive you to the hotel in one of the baby strollers from Season 3's 'Central Park Race'; The first team to open the door to the spa hotel wins, and someone from the losing team will go home tonight!"

Mike: "And what if we refuse to jump?"

Chris: "Oh, that's not a good idea, if someone gives up jumping, they'll have to wear these dreaded chicken hats from the classic challenge" (pulls out a chicken hat) "Plus they'll deduct a point from their team, so it'll be better that there are less chickens and more jumpers"

Lightning: "Ha, this challenge will be easy for Lightning!"

LeShawna: "Okay, no one thinks of giving up or they'll have it with me!"

Cameron: (gulps) "I don't know if I can do this..."

Chris: (Holding his air horn) "One diver per team at a time, the next diver must wait until his team's buggy returns, Ready, get set-" (Sounds air horn)

Lightning: "Woohoo, Lightning strike!" (jumps off the cliff, followed by Sky who jumps up screaming)

(Lightning braces himself and punches Fang in the nose as he dives)

Lightning: "Sha-bam!" (Sky splashes after him, Lightning spits some water out of his mouth and re-emerges with a wrench) Sha-score!" (Then he cartwheels towards Jo's carriage)

Joe: "Yes!" (Starts to push the carriage with Lightning) "Bye Bye, suckers!"

Chris: "And the Newbies take the lead! (Sky swims with the key in hand, passing a whimpering Fang who is comforted by the other two sharks)

Sky: (jumping into Ella's carriage) "Go, go, GO!"

Ella: (Confused) "Which direction was the hotel?"

Sky: (groans) "Never mind, I'll do it!"

Chris: (flying in his jetpack) "Up-pup-up-up, no swaps! You have to stay with your designated driver!"

Sky: "Okay, Ella, just push!"

Ella: "Ok! ...Would you like me to take you easy or fast?" (Sky yells in impatience)


(Meanwhile in the forest...)

Jo: (Looking at Lightning) "Listen, you really don't like me and I really don't like you."

Lightning: "How come you don't like me?" (kisses his bicep)

Jo: "You're kidding, right? The point is that we're the strongest members of our team, do we agree to stay out of each other's way until the teams emerge?"

Lightning: "Cool, but then it's each champion for himself, starting with number one, and that's me."

Jo: (rolls her eyes in annoyance) "Yeah yeah..." (They arrive at the hotel; Lightning puts the key in the lock but it doesn't work)

Lightning: "Come on key, go into the lock!"

Jo: (Crosses her arms) "It won't go in because it's the wrong key, Brightning!" (Just as Jo and Lightning leave, Ella and Sky arrive, Sky puts the key in the lock but it doesn't work either)

Sky: UGH!" (throws the key on the ground) "Wrong key!"

Ella: "Ooh, maybe they left a window open?"


(Back on the cliff...)

Mike: "Come on, come on!"

Topher: (approaching Mike and Zoey) "You know, a lot of fans saw you last season and congratulated you guys on being a couple after all, and I get it, love is love, just like me and my baby, Samantha."

Zoey: "Yes, we are just like you guys"

Mike: "Here comes Jo, what if you're next?"

Zoey: "Uh? I don't know" (looks at the cliff) "It's too high and dangerous, I'm too scared, I refuse to jump" (Chris puts a chicken hat on her) "Wait, I didn't mean that!"

Chris: "Sorry, decisions are final, you better watch what you say" (Zoey notices some angry looks from her team)


Confessional

Zoey: (nervously) "I made a good impression, didn't I?"

End Confessional


Dakota: (punches Zoey in the arm) "You're a coward, watch and learn!" (Readies herself and jumps off the cliff) "Yee-hah!" (landes in the water)

Mike: (He and Zoey look down worriedly) "Oh, do you think she'll be okay?"

(Down in the water, Dakota effortlessly punches and kicks the sharks)

Dakota: (emerges from the water with a key suspiciously shaped like Cody) "Oh, I found one that looks like Cody!"

(Cody looks on in shock as some started laughing)


Confessional

Cody: "How is that key the same shape as my face?!"

Chris: (on PA and laughing) "I was hoping Sierra would be around to make that joke."

Cody: "Oh, you must be kidding me!"

End Confessional


Dakota: (gets out of the water and jumps into Jo's carriage) "Roll!" (They both leave and just as Ella and Sky arrive)

Sky: "Hurry, they're still ahead of us!"

Sugar: "It's my turn!" (jumps off the cliff and dives into the water, grabs a key and swims away avoiding a bite from Fang on the way)

Sky: (to Ella) "Ella, you'd better go faster if we want to go further-" (Notices Sugar flying through the air squealing with delight) "No, wait!-" (Sugar lands right on top of Sky)

Ella: (Struggles to pull the cart) "So heavy!"

Sugar: "Sorry, I was eat a big breakfast"


(Cut to Jo pushing Dakota in the cart to the spa hotel)

Jo: "Listen you daddy's mutant girl; I'm in charge, get in my way and I'll make your life a walking nightmare"

Dakota: "Trust me, I don't want to be in charge, but feel free to knock yourself out here."

Jo: (confused) "Really?" (They arrive at the spa hotel; Dakoya's key doesn't fit)

Dakota: "It doesn't fit, it's too small!"

Jo: "Way to pick the wrong key, North Dakota!"

Dakota: (rolls her eyes) "Very funny."

Jo: (Confused) "Uh... Really?"


Confessional

Jo: "Wow, someone who finally appreciates my killer nicknames"

End Confessional


(Sugar and Ella arrive at the spa hotel, the key doesn't work!

Sugar: "Oh taffy buns, the key is wrong, back we go!" (Sky groans trying to get out of the cart, but Sugar jumps on top of her, crushing her again, Sky groans again) "Do you hear anything?" (Ella shrugs)


(Cut back to the cliff, while Mike is stretching)

Zoey: (Points to Lindsay and Sierra.) "Oh, there they are!"

(Ella was still struggling to push, hanging on to the bar, she finally lets go and collapses into the sand panting)

Zoey: (kisses Mike on the cheek) "Good luck!"

(Mike freezes up, and then backs up in a dazed state babbling, he backs up into LeShawna, sending them both off the cliff)

LeShawna: (emerges from the water, confronted by two sharks growling at her) "Whoa, n-nice s-sharks!"

(Fang rises up behind her, Mike having hit his head, as LeShawna gasps)

Harold: (Gasps) "LeShawna!"

(Suddenly a fireball launches from the cliff and hits Fang in the nose, and the camera shows Zoey breathing fire from her mouth)

Zoey: (glaring) "Leave Mike alone!" (Exhales another fireball and hits the other sharks, making them submerge in the water)

Mike: (from below) "Thank you!"

Shawn: (surprised) "Whoa!"

Sam: "Cool!"

Zoey: (realizes) "Wait? You guys saw me do that?" (blushes) "Um, I really didn't mean to do that, but I guess Mike needed help."

Mike: (getting into the carriege) "Hurry up!"

Jo: (pushing the carriege) "You think I don't know that?!"

Sugar: (getting up from the carriege) "It's all yours!"

Sky: (panting) "Wait!" (gets out of the carriege and collapses on the sand)

Sugar: "Oh, I wonder there were so many lumps..."


(At the hotel spa, Mike tries to open with his key but it doesn't work)

Mike: "It doesn't work!" (groans) "We'll never make it!-" (gasps and turns into Chester)

Chester: (throwing the key on the floor) "Damn key, back in my day we used to open doors like decent people with stones!"

Jo: "Hey Mike, stop complaining and get in the stroller!"

Chester: "Mike? My name is Chester! Sir!"

Jo: (confused and angry) "Huh?!"


Confessional

Mike: (sighs) "Okay, I admit it, I have a multiple personality disorder, I try to control them but they never listen to me!, and Zoey doesn't know about this, right?"

End Confessional


LeShawna: (trying the key but it doesn't work) "Damn, it doesn't work!" (He goes back to the carriege and Ella pushes her, a little more tired)


(Cuts back to the cliff.)

Sam: "Here we go!" (Jumps off the cliff doing a cannonball)

Topher: "Finally!" (Screams as his jumps.)

(They both land at the water, as the sharks go under Sam)

Sam: "Oh no!" (As he sinks underwater, screaming)

(Underwater, Topher grabs a key and swims to the surface)

Chris: "And the Veterans take the lead for the first time in the challenge!"

Topher: (Jumps into the carriege) "Sucker!" (She runs off, pulling Topher)

(Sam emerges from the water, groaning, covered in scratches bruises, holding the key)


(Back at the spa hotel, Ella was resting)

Ella: "I don't think I can do this anymore!"

Topher: "It doesn't work!" (Gets into the carriege) "Go!" (Ella pushes him again)

(Then Jo and Sam appear, with both gasping for air)


Confessional

Jo: "I've never been so tired after running that septathlon" (looks at camera) "I'm not giving up at all! Let that be clear!"

End Confessional


(Cut to Chris on his jet-pack, flying and looking at the camera)

Chris: "They're going head to head and no one has found the key yet, which team will get the right key? And which loser will go home tonight? Find out after the break."

(Commercial Break)

(Then we go back to the cliff, where everyone was waiting anxiously)

Shawn: (watching and pointing) "There she comes!"

LeShawna: (to Lindsay) "Okay, Lindsay, you're next!"

(Lindsay walks to the edge and looks up fearfully)

Lindsay: "I'm scared, and I don't want to get my hair wet, so..." (Chris puts the chicken hat on him) "Sorry guys!" (Sugar taunts her, making chicken noises)

Justin: "I understand you, a real model must take care of his beautiful face, but sometimes you have to take risks, and this model is prepared" (jumps off the cliff)

Harold: "Looks like his over"

(Justin emerges from the water with the key in his hand and the two sharks and Fang growl at him, until they see Justin without shirt, exposes his chest, causing the sharks including Fang to fall in love with him, Fang pulls Justin to shore and leaves, leaving everyone surprised, especially Scott)

Scott: "Oh come on!"

Justin: (jumps into Ella's carriege) "Come on, princess!" (Ella pushes him away, as Jo and Sam arrive)

Zoey: "There they are!"

Mike: (looks at Cameron looking over the cliff) "Good luck, Cam!"

Cameron: (swallows nervously)


Confessional

Cameron: (wearing a chicken hat) "I never learned to swim, until six hours ago, I'm a bubble boy, so I don't get out much" (sighs) "But I'm by no means a force to be underestimated" (looks at a butterfly fly) "It can't be! The monarch butterfly!" (The butterfly lands on her head and wobbles) "It's so heavy!" (falls to the ground)

End Confessional


Cameron: "I can't do it!" (Runs back and Chris puts the chicken hat on him, his team groans in disappointment)

Brick: "We need more keys and less hats!"

Staci: "Hats were invented by my great-great-great-great grandmother Milliam, before that people just let their hair hang freely in the air all the time."

Lightning: (whispering to Brick) "Can I sha-kick her off the cliff?"

Brick: "Um, that would be unorthodox, but if it makes it work, I guess so."

Lightning: "Thank you"

Staci: "And keys were invented by my great great great-" (Lightning kicks her off the cliff and she screams as she falls into the water)


(Back at the hotel, Justin tries his key but it doesn't work)

Justin: "It doesn't work!" (Jumps back into the carriege) "Let's go back!" (Ella looks closely at Justin's chest, and all four eyes light up with love)


Confessional

Ella: "David, it's not what you think, I'm still in love with you, prince" (throws a kiss to the camera)

End Confessional


(We see Ella carry Justin slowly, as Jo and Staci walk over them and try the key)

Jo: "It doesn't work, we have to go back!"

Staci: "Yeah, locks were invented by my-"

Jo: "I don't f*cking care!"

Ella: (Looking at Justin dreamily) "Do I need to go faster, Sir Justin?"

Justin: "It won't be necessary, honey, I'm really enjoying this ride"

Ella: (sighs in love)

(Meanwhile Jo passes them and takes the lead)

Chris: (over PA) "And the Newbies are back in the lead!"


(Back at the cliff, Brick notices Jo reaching the shore)

Brick: "Jo's here, now it's my turn!" (jumps off the cliff, screams but lands on a stone in the groin, cries in pain until he falls into the water)


Confessional

Brick: "I may be the strongest member of my squad, I've received medals in different tasks, the making the bed medal, the raising the flag medal, and the writing letters to mom medal, I always win that one"

End Confessional


(Ella finally arrives on the shore with Justin)

Sky: "They're finally here, we need another jumper!"

Harold: "I will, for LeShawna!" (She rolled her eyes as he jumped, he screamed until he fell face first into the water, receiving several jolts of pain, even from the sharks)


Confessional

Harold: (with red front) "Just to be clear, that was due to my lack of use of mad skills, I'm still attractive to LeShawna, right?"

End Confessional


(Back at the hotel, Brick tries to open the key but it doesn't work)

Brick: "Negative, the key doesn't fit!"

Jo: "What a way, Brick-for-Brains!"

Brick: (angry) "Jo? Would you stop calling me nicknames?!"

Jo: "Whatever you say, Sir Bronkey!" (Brick glares at her)


Confessional

Brick: "I should answer him but I have to play along, like my sergeant says, 'keep your friends away and your enemies closer', oh no, it was, 'keep your family close and your enemy at a distance', oh no, it wasn't like that..."

End Confessional


(Harold tries the key but it doesn't work)

Harold: "Yikes!"


(Back on the cliff, Cody was being pressured to jump)

LeShawna: "Come on, Cody, you can do it!"

Cody: (nervously) "Um, I don't know" (looks at the sharks waving at him and backs away scared) "They'll eat me for sure!"

Dawn: (grabbing his shoulder) "Okay, Cody, don't let your fear of Sierra stop you from making new friends."

Cody: "I don't know, wait what?" (Turns around but Dawn wasn't there) "Dawn?"

Jo: (waiting on the shore) "When is the next maggot coming?"

?: "Right now"

Jo: (turns and looks at Dawn in the carriege and groans) "Whatever!" (He pushes her and Ella arrives)

LeShawna: "They're here! Cody, will you jump yes or no?"

Cody: "I...no way!" (They put the chicken hat on him) "Sorry!"

Izzy: "Oh, Izzy wants to try it!" (jumps up and makes a cannonball, making a big splash)


(Back at the hotel, Dawn tries the key but it doesn't work)

Dawn: "Do not enter!"

Jo: (panting) "How hard is it to find the right key?"

Dawn: (getting on the carriege) "I don't know, I guess you must have been a cliff diver" (both leave when Izzy and Ella arrive)

Izzy: (does somersaults and places the key but it doesn't go in) "Too bad, it's not the right one, let's go back!" (does another somersault and falls into the cart as they drive off)


(Back on the cliff, Scott was holding on to a rock as Lightning tried to let go of him.)

Mike: "It's your turn, dude!"

Scott: "You can't make me!"

Lightning: "Oh yes I can!"

LeShawna: (pointing below) "There Ella comes!"

Shawn: "My time has come, soldiers, wish me luck!" (jumps off the cliff)

Brick: "You have to jump, Scott, it's you or B, and the carriege sure won't support B's weight, no offense, soldier" (B salutes him)

Zoey: "And what about Anne Maria?"

Anne Maria: "What? No, I will not, I will not risk my hair or my tan"

Brick: "Anne Maria, you have to jump, you're the only one who can do it"

Anne Maria: "I already said it's not NO, now if you'll excuse me, I withdrew!" (She takes Chris's hat off and puts it on)

Mike: "You must be kidding me!"

(Shawn gets into the carriege as Ella pushes him)

Chris: "And the Veterans get their lead back for the second time!"

All Newbies: (to Scott) "DIVE!" (Lightning manages to release Scott but they both collide with the robot, causing it to roll to the edge of the cliff, the robot beeping before falling and colliding with several rocks, while Mike, Scott and Lightning look at it in pain, until the robot fell into the water)

LeShawna: (smiling) "Goodbye and good riddance!"

(Under the water, the robot sank as the three sharks bit it until it moved away as it gave off some sparks and exploded, and came out of the water, revealing himself to be Alejandro, he smiled at the camera as everyone looked on in shock)

LeShawna, Cody, Harold, Justin, and Lindsay: "WHAT?!"

LeShawna: "You must be kidding me!"


Confessional

Alejandro: (now in tattered, stained clothes, and longer hair and beard) "The last thing I remember is the volcano burning me and Chris locking me in that robot suit to 'heal' me. How good it feels to be Free after all this time! I have Scott to thank for his cowardice!"

End Confessiomal


(Alejandro lands on his feet on the beach and grabs a key just as he walks up to him, the Newbies cheer but suddenly, his legs wobble, he falls, causing everyone else to flinch)


Confessional

Alejandro: "I was stuck in that robot suit for a year! My legs are so numb it's like I'm in a coma!" (Raises one leg and shakes it) "Wakey, wakey!...Nothing!"

End Confessional


(At the hotel, Shawn runs back to Ella's cart and climbs in, as Ella catches her breath)

Shawn: "Wrong key, goodbye to our advantage"

(At that moment Jo arrives again, this time pushing Alejandro tired)

Ella: (Gasps) "Sir Alejandro? Is that you? When did you get here?

Alejandro: (carried by Jo as she walks up the stairs) "SeƱorita, I was here the whole time! (Puts the key in the lock and opens the door) Finalmente!"

Jo: (smiling) "Finally!"

Chris: (Flies in his jetpack) "The door is open! The Newbies win!" (Shawn and Ella groan in disappointment as the rest of the Newbies on the cliff cheer) "...However! I said there would be a penalty for each member who gave up jumping, the Veterans were 2 people, the Newbies were 3, so therefore, by the rules, the Veterans Falcons are the true winners!"

(The Veterans Falcons cheer, as the Newbies Birdies groan in disappointment, Alejandro also cheers but is released by Jo, falling to the ground)

Alejandro: "Ow..."


I

(We then cut to everyone in the elimination ceremony, with the Veterans at the peanut gallery, and the Newbies in the elimination area)

Chris: "Welcome to our first elimination ceremony! How do you like the new Peanut Gallery? Huh. Now, opponents can watch someone give them the boot, before they head to the Spa Hotel for a deluxe dinner."

(The Veterans all cheered at this)

Ezekiel: (aproaching to Anne Maria) "Psst. Hey.. I know this awkward but.. I decided to give you these as a gift, uh!" (Hands out some yellow flowers.)

Anne Maria: "Ooh! Yellow! My favorite! How sweet?" (Gets the flowers smells them beautifully.)

Chris: "Before we start, I need one winner to volunteer for a special reward."

Sugar: (Runs to Chris.) "I do! Is it a special feast?"

Chris: "Nope, your reward is...spending the night in exile on Boney Island with all the hungry wild animals!"

Sugar: (Disappointed.) "Aww, man! How's that a reward?!"

Chris: (Holding up a McLean Invincibility Statue) "Because there's a McLean Invincibility Statue hidden somewhere on Boney Island! Find it, and you're golden"

Scott: (Growls in frustration) "Now he tells us..."


Confessional

Sugar: "I sure will be golden when I find this statue!"

End Confessional


Chris: (As Chef leads Sugar to the boat of losers) "This year, you get to vote by placing an X on the 8x10 photo of the person you want to eliminate." (Pointing to the outhouse) "Now, get voting"


Confessionals

(We see a split screen of all of the Newbies voting, half by half.)

End Confessionals


Chris: "Okay, the votation are finished, Alejandro?" (Alejandro arrives in a wheelchair, now in an intern's uniform and with a plate of marshmallows) "You may not be a competitor but you can be a nice intern, the following players are safe following people are safe" (Alejandro tosses the marshmallows to the contestants) "Cameron, Mike, Scott, Lightning, Sam, Dakota, B, Dawn, Brick, Jo, and surprisingly enough, Staci; Anne Maria, you're on the chopping block for refusing to jump just because you won't ruin your hair, and Zoey, you're on the chopping block for refusing to jump for first time"

Zoey: (nervous) "W-what!?"

Chris: "And the first loser is.." (The camera pans to Anne Maria glaring, Zoey looking nervously, until Chris announced who's eliminated.) "Anne Maria!" (Alejandro tosses the last marshmallow to Zoey)

Anne Maria: "WHAT?!"

Ezekiel: (Runs to her.) "NOOOOOOO!! She can't go that early! We just got started to date!"

Anne Maria: "Yeah! Now because of that, I'm gonna ride in that stupid hurl again?!"

Chris: "Nope! This year, we've got a NEW elimination device! You'll love it!"


(We then cut to a giant toilet at the end of the Dock of Shame; Anne Maria is sitting inside it, while Chris and the newbies Ezekiel stand in front of it.)

Chris: "Behold, the Flush of Shame! -patent pending!"

(The Newbies all groan in disgust at this, as Ezekiel runs to Anne Maria.)

Ezekiel: "Don't worry. I'll win for you."

Anne Maria: "Really?"

(Ezekiel nods in response.)

Anne Maria: "Awww, you're the sweetest boy I've ever met."

Ezekiel: "Thanks eh!"

(They tried to lean for a kiss, but Chris pushes the button, As Anne Maria was flushed down the toilet screaming, as Ezekiel looks in shock. Then a wave of toilet water washes Zeke's face and everyone except Chris, who has an umbrella, while the Newbies groan in disgust)

Chris: (Giggles, tossing the umbrella aside) "Who will be flushed into the history books next, find out when we return next week, on Total! Drama! Madness!"

(End credits)

I


BONUS CLIP:

(The scene fades into a sewer, where a giant albino alligator is lying face down under a drain, suddenly water gushes from above, and Anne Maria falls down and lands right on top of the alligator's head)

Anne Maria: (disgusted) "Eugh! In a sewer?! You must be kidding me! I left and now this, I hate this show!"

(The alligator roars and Anne Maria falls into the water. The alligator snaps its jaw and Anne Maria runs off screaming as the alligator chases her)


Votes:

Anne Maria: Zoey, Mike, Cameron, Scott, Sam, Brick, Jo, B, Dawn and Staci

Zoey: Dakota and Anne Maria

Staci: Lightning


25th-Anne Maria


A double episode, the introduction and the first person to go, I didn't want to cut Staci out early so she wouldn't be so predictable (I have something planned for her), so I chose Anne Maria since she didn't have much to do here, so I feel Anne Maria's fans...

And no, Alejandro will not participate, this time he will be an intern, inspired by a fic called "Starless", let's see what he will do over time

Don't forget to check out my co-writer's stories, he has great one-shots

The next episode will take the campers in a total shock, to win challenges and discover some secrets, what will it be? Find out next time...