"Are you sure you're ready for this? You know you can take more time."
Kate rolled her eyes, securing her Glock into her holster before sitting down on the edge of the sofa to pull on her boots.
"Stop fretting. I feel fine."
Hank eyed her from his place in the kitchen, lifting a steaming mug of coffee to his lips as he watched her finish getting ready.
It had been three months since the attack on New York and three months since Kate had successfully donated a kidney to save her bother's life. Hank had been by her side every step of the way, calling Sam Miller and requesting an urgent extension to his furlough so that he could stay in town with her while she recovered. After another two weeks in New York, Kate had her stitches removed and was cleared to fly by her surgeon so the two of them returned to Chicago where Kate continued her recovery at home, still under Hank's watchful eye.
The first few weeks had been tough for the both of them, Kate constantly irritated that she wasn't able to do the simplest of tasks and Hank struggling to deal with her stubbornness without letting his own temper get the better of him. But what truly killed the both of them was not being able to be intimate given that Kate's surgeon had slapped them with a six week sex ban whilst her body recovered. By the end of the third week, they were both feeling the strain.
"Kate, we can't…"
Hank gently grasped her biceps, stalling her wandering hands as Kate let out a groan of frustration against the skin of his throat. She was sat astride him on the sofa, her hips rolling languidly against his own and he could feel his resolve slipping further and further away with each passing second. She still had a few more weeks before the doctor said she could resume 'normal sexual activity' but her greedy lips and needy hands were making it incredibly difficult for him to obey the good doctor's orders.
"Yes we can…just…take it slow."
With each word, a puff of air hit the damp skin of his neck and Hank's eyes slipped closed, head falling back against the cushion at the sensation. She was absolutely going to be the death of him, he was sure of it.
With herculean effort, he took hold of her hands, grasping them firmly with his own to prevent her from undressing him any further but it didn't stop her winding her hips from grinding against the throbbing bulge in his jeans.
"No, you're not ready."
Dropping her forehead to his shoulder, she stilled in his arms and his stomach dropped like a stone when he felt his shirt become damp with her tears.
"Hey."
He wrapped one arm around her back, running a palm soothingly over her spine whilst the other cupped the back of her head, cradling her against his body.
"I-I just need you." Her whimpered admission had his heart clenching in his chest.
"I know baby, I know. You don't think I need you as well, hmm?" To prove his point, he rolled his hips once, letting her feel just how much he needed her. "But your health and recovery is more important. It's just a few more weeks."
Tucking her face into the space where his neck met his shoulder, Kate closed her eyes at the sound of his heart thrumming reassuringly beneath her ear, the pace a little faster than his regular rhythm and she knew that this was just as difficult for him, if not more so.
"I'm sorry." She whispered, her thumb tracing an ambiguous pattern across the hollow of his throat, soothed by the gentle pulse. "Now I've started something I can't finish."
He chuckled, pressing a light kiss to her forehead and running his fingers through the soft strands of her hair.
"I'm sure we'll make up for it."
Sure enough, on the final day of their medically-imposed celibacy sentence, Kate was waiting for him when he finished work and, before he even had the chance to shut the door behind him she had launched herself into his arms, legs wrapping around his waist as she demanded he take her upstairs.
That was six weeks ago and now here she was, preparing for her first day back at work and she knew Hank was having a hard time with the thought of her returning to active duty. Three months was the minimum suggested recovery period and, ever the overachiever, on week twelve Kate had been cleared by her physician and passed both the physical and mental assessments that the CPD required with flying colours.
As far as she was concerned, there was no reason why she couldn't get back to normal.
When they returned from New York, Hank had taken an additional week of furlough, claiming that he had to use the time before the end of the month but barely two days in he received a call from Fischer asking him to come in and deal with some kind of emergency. At first he outright refused but, after nearly an hour of bickering, Kate eventually persuaded him that she'd be perfectly fine left unattended for a few hours and he reluctantly left her to her own devices.
Her doorbell rang barely thirty minutes after he left and, with a grunt of pain, she hoisted herself off the sofa and opened the door to reveal Adam on her doorstep, a wide, handsome grin plastered on his face. Apparently he was 'in the neighbourhood' and Hank asked him to drop by to see if she needed anything. She invited him in and the two caught up for a bit before she shooed him back to work. Kate didn't even get through an episode of the Great British Baking Show when she was interrupted by another knock at the door, only this time Kate found Jay on her doormat with a peace offering in the form of a bag of Kate's favourite cookies in hand.
When Hank eventually went back to work full time, every few hours he would send a member of the unit to her apartment to check on her. The pattern continued for a good few weeks until Kate finally lost her temper and stormed through the Intelligence bullpen, past her stunned teammates and swinging his office door open so hard that the glass rattled before threatening to change the locks if he kept assigning members of the most elite police unit in Chicago to "Kate Watch".
She could still recall the look of shock on his face as his eyes roamed her form, starting with his well-worn CPD sweater (noting with amusement that she had to turn the sleeves back twice in order to utilise her hands), down her shapely legs to her little moccasin-clad feet. He spent a good hour after she left willing away a sizeable erection before he was able to leave the safety of his office and continue with the rest of his day.
But even without Hank's direct orders, the team stopped by her apartment in varying combinations every few days to check in, giving her some juicy details on whatever case they'd been working on but, as much as she loved them for indulging her, she was thrilled at the prospect of not having to live vicariously through them anymore.
As she finished lacing up her boot, she got to her feet and moved towards Hank who was studying her every move, watching closely for any sign of pain or discomfort. With a half-smile, Kate stopped in front of him and rose up to plant a chaste kiss on his lips.
"I love you. And I love that you care. But seriously, I'm fine."
After a beat, Hank nodded imperceptibly and took one last sip of his coffee before the two headed into work. When Kate arrived at the 21st, the Intelligence bullpen was already buzzing with activity, the team knee-deep in a case that they had been working on for the past few days.
"Ahh, the superhero returns!"
Adam's voice carried across the room and Kate could't help but grin at the sight of her friends and colleagues turning to greet her.
She hugged them one by one before heading to her desk, dropping her purse down and casting her eyes around the room, the familiarity somewhat soothing. The bullpen was exactly how she had left it aside from one, pretty significant difference. The desk behind hers that used to seat Antonio Dawson was now occupied by Detective Hailey Upton, formerly of CPD's Robbery Homicide division.
Not long after Hank returned to work, he came home one evening wound tighter than a coiled spring and, after some coercion in the form of a glass of scotch and a shoulder massage, he finally opened up and told her how Antonio had injured his shoulder on a case a few months' back, beginning to stumble down the slippery slope that was oxycodone. Hank had gotten him into a clinic but the subsequent relapse had driven him to seek the support of his family and so he had moved down to Costa Rica to be with Gabby. Upton had been with the department a few weeks and, according to Hank, she was doing well so far.
Before she could take her seat, Adam sidled up behind her and slapped both palms over her eyes.
"The hell Ruz!?"
"Just a minute, we've got a surprise for you."
She stopped squirming and, after a few seconds, Adam released her from his grip and her eyes opened to find Jay standing in front of her, a large white mug in his outstretched hands and a big cheesy grin on his face. The mug had image of Wonder Woman but they had swapped out Gal Gadot's face for Kate's and printed the words "Kate 'Wonder Woman' Meadows" at the bottom in bold, black font.
Kate laughed at their juvenile behaviour, taking the mug from Jay's hands, thanking them profusely for their kind, generous offering. Placing the cup down on her desk, she was about to sit down when she felt a presence at her elbow. Turning her head, she was greeted by the big blue eyes of the newest member of their unit.
"Hailey Upton, really good to finally meet you."
Hailey had extended a hand with a genuine smile on her face as Kate turned fully towards her, accepting the other detective's hand in her own with a mirroring smile.
"Kate Meadows, good to meet you too. I've heard a lot of great things."
The two didn't get a chance to engage any further as Hank returned from his office, shirtsleeves rolled up and ready to get back to business.
"So, let's bring Meadows up to speed on where we are with the MAC-10's."
Jay stepped up to the whiteboard, pointing to the image of the guns pinned up in the centre of the board.
"Four days ago, we received intel that these two…" He gestured to the mugshots of two men who were very clearly brothers. "…are manufacturing MAC-10 submachine guns and selling them to local arms dealers. These weapons have been altered to fire armour piercing bullets at a rate of fifteen hundred rounds a minute."
"Cop killers." Kate muttered, earning a nod from Jay.
"But they're smart. They rarely do business with anyone they aren't familiar with. They start small with Glocks, Colts, SIG Sauers and, then when they're sure the buyers are for real, they graduate to the big stuff."
When he finished, Kim took over, standing parallel to Jay with the whiteboard separating them.
"Yesterday, these weapons were used in a mass shooting in Washington Park. Total of fifteen dead and another eight in critical condition at Chicago Med."
"Fucking hell." Kate slid a hand down her face, already beginning to wish she'd stayed in the comfort of her apartment in her fluffy socks and the comfy sweatshirt she'd stolen from Hank.
"We've got Jay and Adam undercover as potential buyers but its taking time to work up to the MAC-10s. Next step is to get a meet with Raymond Newton." She jabbed her finger at the picture of the man on the far left who was evidently the brains of the outfit.
Hank took a step forward, adopting his usual wide-legged stance with his hands jammed into the pockets of his Levis.
"So, let's set up the meet. Your four…" He pointed to Jay, Hailey, Adam and Kim in turn. "I want you up these guy's asses until we get sight of those guns. Keep the pressure on. Atwater, Meadows, get down to Washington Park and see what you can dig up on the shooting. Talk to your CIs, speak to neighbours, the usual routine. Al, get on the horn to ATF, I want everything they've got on these brothers."
With the orders given, the team dispersed and left the bullpen but, just as Kate was about to follow Kevin down to the garage, she felt someone gently tug at her elbow. Lifting her eyes, she was greeted by Hank's warm brown eyes boring into her own hazel orbs.
"Please be careful." The bullpen was empty aside from Alvin and Kevin but he still kept his tone low.
They weren't a couple that indulged in public displays of affection but today felt like a significant day for the both of them so Kate planted one palm on his chest and reached up to peck his lips softly, using her thumb to swipe away any evidence before stepping back.
"Promise."
He nodded, somewhat satisfied but he still sent a pointed look over her head towards her partner who dipped his chin in understanding, the two men sharing an unspoken exchange before the partners left.
"How you feelin'?"
Kate was riding shotgun in Kevin's Hellcat, absentmindedly watching the world go by when she heard her partner's question. Turning to face him, she noticed his warm gaze was already on her face and she smiled lightly, reaching across the console to pat his shoulder.
"I'm fine, Kev. I've been cleared by the docs, passed my eval with Platt and requalified at the range a few days ago."
"That's not what I asked." He said pointedly, levelling her with a knowing look.
Kate sighed, turning her eyes back towards the window. Whilst she had passed all of the tests needed to return to work, she was still suffering some residual emotional trauma from the bombing, mainly in the form of seeing Mohammad Al-Khalili's face wherever she went.
It didn't matter if it was the grocery store or the gym, she would catch a fleeting glimpse of a messy mop of black hair or a green jacket and her pulse would quicken, palms becoming clammy until she was back in the safety of her Jeep or her apartment. She would even see his face in the shadows of her bedroom when she woke in the middle of the night, gasping for air, skin slick with sweat and her heart pounding in her chest. Of course Hank knew about her nightmares but she shrugged them off, telling him that it was nothing to worry about but she still hadn't been forthcoming with him when it came to her anxiousness when leaving the house. Kate had, however, confided in her partner when he stopped by her apartment a few weeks' ago.
"It's getting less and less frequent but…I can't seem to shake it Kev. I just…I see him in the weirdest of places. I mean, it's ridiculous. I saw him blow himself to dust for fuck's sake. It's completely irrational."
Kevin nodded, turning his attention back to the road as he guided the car through the mid-morning traffic.
"Well, that's trauma for you…there's no rhyme or reason to it. It just…it sneaks up on you."
"Yeah, no shit."
Turning right down South Lafayette Avenue, Kevin's eyes darted to her profile one more before asking the question he knew would have her bristling.
"You still not told Voight?"
As he expected, Kate prickled at the thought of giving Hank yet another thing to worry about when it came to her recovery. She already felt like a burden and she'd be damned if she was going to add to it.
"He worries enough as it is, Kev. I'm not going to stack this on his plate as well. I'll figure it out."
Sensing the conversation over, he pulled over to the side of the road and put the car in park before they both got out and began pounding the pavement, hunting for information that would help them solve the case.
When they returned to the district a few hours later with not much to show for their efforts, the team were preparing for Jay and Adam's imminent buy with the Newton brothers.
"Ok, we approach cautiously and quietly. You know how dangerous these guns are. Vests aren't going to be much help if you catch a bullet today but, regardless, let's gear up."
Kate made to follow the unit down to the garage when Hank pulled her back for the second time that day. In her peripheral vision, Kate noticed that Alvin had also hung back from the rest of the group, no doubt having pretty good idea of what his friend was about to do.
"I think maybe you should sit this one out."
Kate's eyes hardened as she stared him down. He had promised her when they started this thing that he wouldn't treat her any differently than the rest of the team and, already, he was beginning to renege on that commitment.
"Oh you do? Well, I think you should stop treating me like I'm made of glass."
His face become stony at her tone and he crossed his arms over his chest, a clear indicator that he wasn't impressed with her insubordination.
"Have you forgotten who you're talking to?" His voice was deadly but it was lost on Kate who's infamous temper was already beginning to flare.
"Oh no, I know exactly who I'm talking to…Sarg."
Hank took a step towards her, fire blazing in his eyes but, to her credit she didn't flinch or step backwards.
"Question is, do you? Because the boundary between my boss and the man I sleep with seems to be pretty blurry right now."
Kate continued to meet his gaze, taking a half-step closer to him so that her chest brushed the outside of his folded forearms.
"If you have concerns that I'm not fit for duty and that I might pose a danger to my unit, feel free to bench me because, as the leader of this unit, that is absolutely your right. But don't you fucking dare bench me just because you're scared something might happen to me. That's not who we are Voight."
His eyes softened ever so slightly as she paused for breath. As much as he hated to admit it, she was right and every word out of her mouth was like a bucket of icy water over the inferno in his chest.
"You think I love the thought of you being out there in the line of fire day in day out? That I don't have nightmares that maybe one day you won't come back to me?"
Grabbing him firmly by the biceps, she gave him a sharp shake as her fingertips dug into the hard muscle under his shirt, silently begging him to understand.
"Hank, I am so ridiculously in love with you. I'd be completely lost without you. But I have to trust that you'll do everything in your power to come home to me. You have to trust that I'll do the same or this isn't going to work."
When she fell silent, they simply stared at one another for a few moments.
She'd given him an ultimatum. He either let her do what she was trained to do or she would walk. From their relationship or the unit, he wasn't sure. But as far as he was concerned, neither was an option.
Eventually, Hank nodded.
Kate wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him and kiss away the pained look on his face but, knowing now wasn't the time or the place, she gave his arms one final squeeze before following her unit down the stairs to gear up, leaving Hank and Alvin alone.
Hank let out a long breath, his head dropping backwards as he lifted his eyes to the ceiling, praying to whoever was looking down on him to give him the strength to survive being in love with such a strong-willed, passionate and, quite frankly, sometimes terrifying woman.
Alvin suddenly appeared at his elbow, an amused look on his face as he planted a hand on Hank's shoulder.
"You know, I think you've met your match with her, man."
