Lyrical
Disclaimer: I do not own My Hero Academia.
Warnings: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Death
Pairings: Midoriya x Bakugou
Plot: Love & loss. All the moments in-between.
You took my breath away, so now I can't suck in my stomach around you anymore.
We're too old to live with our parents, do you wanna wake up to me every morning?
Ch 02: Touch Tank
"You're doing it again."
Midoriya blinks in rapid succession, glancing over at the blonde standing beside him.
"Stop doing that, you're going to pass out. Breathe."
Midoriya inhales a shaky breath, then exhales it slowly. He offers the other an apologetic smile, a peal of nervous laughter trapped in his throat.
"It's just…" He peeks around the tall velvet curtains again, looking out past the spotlit podium towards the crowd gathered before the empty stage. "There's so many people. I'm going to forget my cue cards-" He bit his lip, arching his brow, clenching and unclenching his fists slowly. "I won't know what to say. I'll mess this up-"
"I'm right here." The blonde says, and Midoriya meets his crimson eyes. He holds that steady gaze, watching the rhythmic rise and fall of the other's strong chest, remembering all he has to do is keep breathing, and everything will be just fine.
He reaches for Bakugou's hand, his fingers trembling, and the blonde wraps warm, calloused fingers around his own, squeezing reassuringly.
"You've got this, nerd. You've worked so hard. Just talk about your creations, talk about the gadgets you love. Don't focus on trying to impress anyone, you've already done that. They're here because of your work. Your inventions." He searches Midoriya's eyes, tightening his hold. "Don't lock your knees, and don't look directly into the lights. Concentrate on your breathing, and just be yourself. They're going to love you. There's nothing to worry about."
"I don't want to-" Midoriya breathed out shakily before inhaling slowly again. "I don't want to say something stupid, and embarrass UA, or my mom." He furrowed his brow, adding timidly, "Will you stay with me?"
Bakugou's expression remains stoic for a moment, then softens as he offers Midoriya a teasing smile.
"Still need me to hold your hand after all this time, Deku?"
Midoriya laughs softly, nodding as he bows his head, squeezing Bakugou's fingers. "Always."
There's blood on his tongue. Blood in the back of his throat, copper mixed with bile. Ash floating through the air, fires burning in the abandoned buildings nearby, mirroring the distant skyscrapers already consumed by flames. A siren wails, flashing lights streaking past on the streets far below, ringing in his ears.
He takes a step closer, looking down at the blonde kneeling before him, and it's all Bakugou can do to remain upright. He's hunched over, an arm wrapped around his middle as he coughs violently and grits his teeth against blooming pain.
"Kaachan." Midoriya sighs, and Bakugou can't help but flinch at hearing his childhood name. "I've imagined this. I've imagined this moment. For years I've wondered what it would be like to see the Number One Pro Hero Dynamight on his knees before me, begging for his life."
Bakugou makes a sound in his chest, something between a pained groan and a defiant growl, and with all the strength he can muster he lifts his head and meets Midoriya's eyes.
There's blood splattered across his face, one of his eyes blackened and nearly swollen shut. Sweat clings to his brow, his cheeks both pale and flushed at the same time, and the blood trickling from his side continues puddling against the concrete beneath him, darkening the ashy rooftop.
He doesn't say anything. Midoriya isn't sure if he can, with his injuries as severe as they are. He simply glares up at Midoriya for a long, silent moment, then drops his head again, exhaling a pained whine.
Midoriya's lips turn down into a frown, and he takes a step closer, narrowing his eyes at the way Bakugou's shoulders tense.
"Go on, Kaachan. Beg for your life." Midoriya murmurs softly, reaching out to grasp a handful of soot-smeared blonde hair. "I want to hear you beg. I want to hear you beg, the same way my mother begged."
Bakugou hisses as his head is yanked up, and he's forced to meet Midoriya's eyes, a sheen of tears glossing over his sight.
"It was an accident-" Bakugou starts, but Midoriya's heard it all before. All the excuses, all the lies.
"You helped cover it up." Midoriya seethes, tightening his hold. "You buried the truth to save yourselves, all of you. You blamed it on villains when heroes were responsible for her death! I trusted you, Katsuki!"
His breath hitches, his anger twisting into grief, emerald lightning snapping around his wrists and dancing up his arms.
"You were the only one I could count on, the only one who could make things right, and you let them bury her without telling anyone the truth about what happened!" He jerked Bakugou towards him as he screamed into his face, "How could you do that to her?! How could you?!"
Bakugou's face is scrunched up, and the tears in his eyes have gathered in his lashes, threatening to spill down his cheeks. It sends an icy thrill through him, seeing Bakugou hurting, knowing at any moment the hero might actually cry.
Midoriya isn't certain how long it's been since he's seen Bakugou Katsuki vulnerable like this. Beaten and bloodied, his spirit nearly broken. It's a pitiful sight.
"She loved you." Midoriya hisses in his face, holding Bakugou's eyes. "She loved you like her own, and you betrayed her. You betrayed us both."
"I'm sorry-" Bakugou starts, but Midoriya releases him, letting him fall. Bakugou cries out as he slumps against the rooftop, doubling over on himself, one trembling palm pressed against the bloody concrete to brace himself as he heaves and coughs up more blood.
"Beg." Midoriya growls again, taking a few steps away, crossing his arms over his chest as he watches one of the burning buildings begin to fall. "Beg for your miserable, pathetic life." He turns to cast his eyes upon the hero, and Bakugou's sobbing softly as he tries to push himself upright again.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He whispers, choking on his words, and Midoriya steps closer to him again, reaching for him once more.
Golden sunlight streaming in through soft, yellow curtains. Bakugou's breathing softly against his pillow, cheek pressed against it where he rests on his stomach, his broad shoulders bathed in the early morning light.
Midoriya watches him sleep, his smile tender as he reaches out to card his fingers through Bakugou's hair, marveling at the way it reflects the sunlight, memorizing the way it feels beneath the palm of his hand.
Warm, he's always so warm. He radiates heat like a furnace. Maybe it's a residual effect of his quirk, Midoriya doesn't really know for sure. He presses closer to Bakugou's side, pressing a kiss to his bronze shoulder. He's soft and smells like sunshine, like fresh air on a summer day, like wheatgrass and clean laundry.
Bakugou parts his eyes slowly, still half-asleep. Midoriya chuckles quietly under his breath, carding his fingers through Bakugou's hair over and over again. Coaxing him to relax, coaxing him to close his eyes once more.
"I love you." He whispers, pressing his lips to Bakugou's cheek. "I love you, Katsuki. Happy birthday."
Bakugou hums and exhales slowly, rolling onto his side and wrapping Midoriya in his arms, tugging him against his chest. Midoriya smiles and laughs quietly, cuddling up beside him. Bakugou finds his hand, and laces their fingers. Midoriya squeezes back gently, tracing his thumb across his knuckles, hiding his face against the blonde's neck.
There's breakfast in bed, then a shower for two, before they walk to the nearest station and buy day passes for the train. Bakugou isn't certain where they're going, Midoriya's kept it secret for months. He presses closer under his arm, an impish little smile turning up his lips as he smooths his fingers over the fabric of Bakugou's favorite blue shirt.
It's faded now from years of washing, but if you know what to look for you can barely recognize the crest for the Musutafu Aquarium, with a bottlenose dolphin posed directly in the middle, mid-flip.
When they arrive at their destination Bakugou's completely in awe. As if they haven't been to the aquarium together countless times before.
They walk hand in hand through winding glass tunnels, stopping to marvel at the sealife all around them. Bakugou loves dolphins, stingrays, and all kinds of sharks. Midoriya's fond of sea turtles, of tiny seahorses and lacy jellyfish.
They have a reservation at the underwater café for lunch, and afterwards they wander through each of the exhibits until they reach a large, open display. There are children gathered around the touch tanks, and Midoriya watches Bakugou's growing excitement as he patiently waits for his turn. Once the crowd has cleared he steps forward, the attendant greeting them with a cherry smile and pointing to the various things they're allowed to touch.
The aquarium's added a few new specimens since the last time they visited, and Bakugou's face lights up as he realizes just what's swimming lazily towards them across the shell-littered sand.
"A spotted stingray." Bakugou whispers, his voice breathless and light.
"You can touch him!" The attendant reassures, gesturing for Bakugou to reach out his hand. He follows her instructions, dipping his hand beneath the saltwater and gliding it along the ray's back, fanning his fingers across pale grey polkadots.
Midoriya takes in every movement, from the way Bakugou's fingers shift minutely across the ray's fins, to the way his smile curves up his flushed cheeks and makes his crimson eyes sparkle.
Anemones and urchins, sea stars and conchs. They leave the touch tanks behind, and continue on through the aquarium until they reach the museum exhibits near the end. Fossils and diagrams displaying elusive creatures of the deep, the suspended skeleton of a giant blue whale hanging overhead.
They step outside into the sunshine, and Midoriya tugs at Bakugou's wrist, leading him to one of the giant pools nearby. There are people gathering around to watch the handlers feed a pair of dolphins, whistling and signing commands that have the two leaping together and flipping mid-air.
"Come on!" Midoriya laughs, tugging Bakugou closer, one of the handlers glancing up as they reach the edge of the pool, offering out a small bucket of fish.
Bakugou's taken back, but Midoriya merely grins and nods his head, waiting for Bakugou to accept it. The handlers whistle and give commands, and Bakugou tosses fish to the dolphins to reward them for their tricks, until eventually the bucket is empty. The handler takes it from him, then tells him to reach out his hand instead.
One of the dolphins draws closer, clicking and whistling as it presses its nose to Bakugou's palm. Bakugou's grinning wide and laughing as he rubs across the dolphin's nose, Midoriya watching for a long moment before reaching out to touch as well.
They leave as the sun sets, standing together on the train and sharing a handrail. Bakugou's palm spreads warmth against Midoriya's side, petting along the curve of his ribs over and over again, affectionate and reverent. He isn't much for displaying affection in public, but he holds Midoriya close enough to dip down and kiss his temple without being seen, inhaling quietly against his dark hair.
"You're pretty sneaky when you wanna be." He murmurs, and Midoriya lifts his eyes to meet Bakugou's, his chest twisting at the blonde's smile. "You're amazing, you know that?"
"I just wanted to make you happy." Midoriya whispers back, and Bakugou's expression softens. He leans close again, and this time his lips brush Midoriya's freckled cheek.
"You make me happy." He whispers, fanning his fingers against Midoriya's spine, his palm radiating warmth. "You make me happy every single day. I don't know what I'd do without you."
Midoriya grabs Bakugou's hair, and it's gentler than he intended for it to be. The hero lets out a shuddering breath and carefully meets Midoriya's eyes. There's ash clinging to his lips, clumping against his bloody face like papier-mâché.
"I don't want your apologies." Midoriya whispers, pushing back whatever semblance of pity he may have otherwise held. "You said nothing when it mattered. Nothing! You're just like the rest of them. Now, I want to hear you beg."
It's a night like any other night. They're walking home from the theater, breaths crafting tufts of fog against the windy cold. Hand in hand, fingers covered by mittens and gloves. Midoriya's phone starts ringing, and he pauses his steps to retrieve it from his pocket, answering the call with a little smile.
"Hey mom! I missed your call during the movie, I was going to call you back once we got home-"
He stops to listen, Bakugou standing beside him, frowning a little as Midoriya's expression twists with worry.
"You said…what? Where?"
"What's happening?" Bakugou asks softly, Midoriya turning away slightly and pressing his palm over his other ear.
"Mom? I can't hear you-" He turns to look towards the heart of the city, and Bakugou follows his line of sight, noticing spotlights and helicopters circling unlit skyscrapers. Something had knocked the power out, and from the faint wailing of sirens in the distance one could easily surmise there'd been some sort of villain attack.
Bakugou draws his own phone from his pocket, noticing several missed calls and quickly dialing pro hero dispatch. Midoriya is still struggling to understand what's happening, and then he turns towards Bakugou with fear in his eyes.
"Mom's downtown, right in the middle of it! She was out holiday shopping-"
There's an explosion in the distance, and Midoriya loses his connection with his mother. When he looks around civilians are running off in all directions, ducking for cover and screaming, and Bakugou's already running towards their car.
"Izuku, come on! We have to go! The others are already fighting!"
"O-Okay!" Midoriya calls, running after him with lead in his stomach, panic burning tightly in his chest.
They'd find her. He knew the area where she was shopping. Everything would be fine - it was always fine. The heroes would take care of things, they'd make sure everyone was safe. They had to. They had to.
As a support-class hero, Midoriya was an invaluable asset to the pro heroes around him. Being Quirkless had never deterred him from doing everything in his power to be a hero himself, and when he'd graduated top of his class and debuted his original inventions his mother had never been more proud.
She'd always been there for him, supporting him throughout his academic struggles, comforting him when his experiments failed, encouraging him to try again and never give up - no matter what. He owed her so much, he strived daily to repay her for her boundless love and unwavering kindness.
When he'd come out to her, and told her he was in love with Bakugou, she had accepted him and their relationship without a second thought.
As they reached the edge of the shopping district rubble completely blocked off the streets, and so Bakugou and Midoriya ran into the fray on foot, finding the other heroes that had already gathered.
Uravity and Froppy, Chargebolt and Red Riot. Heroes he supported, friends he'd known since high school. He tells them about his mother, and they relay her name over their communications network, promising they'll find her as quickly as possible and bring her to Midoriya unharmed.
Bakugou tugs him close, holding him tightly for a fleeting moment before they have to part. He doesn't have his gauntlets, but his quirk is overwhelmingly powerful even without them. He leaves Midoriya behind, they all do. They're pro heroes, on another level Midoriya can never be.
All he can do is wait for them to return. Wait for them to find his mother, and hope that they aren't too late.
He's not sure how long he stands on the street alone before he starts searching for her, digging through rubble and shouting her name, asking anyone he crosses paths with if they've seen her.
The explosions keep coming, windows shattering, buildings toppling. Midoriya feels helpless, desperate. He does everything he can possibly do, given the circumstances. He's little more than a civilian himself without his gadgets in hand, but he knows hero protocol to a tee. He knows well what he's supposed to do, where to go and how to help during emergencies like this.
He searches the places where civilians are most likely to be evacuated to, and when he doesn't find her amongst the crowds accumulated there he returns to the streets, trying over and over to reach her on her phone.
He hears the phone ringing before he sees her. She's barely visible, beneath the rubble that's fallen.
He doesn't dare try to move her, she's covered in glass and pinned by a heavy beam. When he reaches for her hand her fingers twitch against his, and he urges her to be calm, to be still.
"Mom! Mom, it's okay. I'm right here! I've got you, everything's going to be okay-"
The rubble shifts, raining down fragments of broken concrete from the ceiling, shards of brick and glass falling all around them.
"Izuku! Oh my sweet boy. My dear, sweet boy. There you are." She whispers, and she tries to laugh but doesn't have enough space to. Every breath she takes squeezes more air from her lungs.
"Try not to move, mom! You've got to stay still!" He fumbles with his phone, dialing Bakugou first, and when he doesn't answer he tries the emergency line. It's busy. So is the hero dispatch line. So is the support team. It's all hands on deck, there's no one available to answer his call. No one there to help him. He's never felt more alone.
"Sweetheart." Inko whispers, wheezing as she gasps for breath. "I need you to be brave for me, sweetheart. I need you to promise me you'll be brave."
"Mom-" Midoriya chokes, and it takes everything inside him not to start crying. He tries to be strong, he's always tried so hard to be strong for her.
Her lips are turning blue, and she can't catch her breath. There's blood dripping from her mouth.
"It's alright. It's alright now." She whispers, her fingers cold as she clings to his hand. "Everything's alright." She closes her eyes for a moment, and her face twists as she tries to inhale but finds she can't. The rubble is crushing her, and Midoriya can't lift it, can't do anything but kneel beside her and watch.
"Mom?" Midoriya whimpers, holding onto her hand tightly, desperate and shaking, his voice pitching higher as it breaks. "Mama?"
"Not like this." She whispers, and it isn't to him, not really. She's wheezing as her gaze wanders, and her grip on his hand grows slack. "Not like this. Not yet. Not like this, please?" She's crying and her face is twisted. Midoriya's never heard her sound so afraid. "Not…not like this…"
Midoriya clings to her hand, rocking back and forth, whimpering as he cries softly. He whispers to her, telling her she's alright. That she's okay. He tells her he's right beside her. He's with her. He isn't going away.
She can't look at him, can't speak anymore. Midoriya calls for help again and again to no avail. He finally discards his phone, and screams for help instead. No one answers. No one's even close.
He waits. Seconds stretch out into centuries. He kneels beside her, sobbing brokenly, as the light fades from her eyes.
It isn't until days later, when raw footage is leaked online, that he discovers what truly happened.
Chargebolt and Red Riot are two of the first on scene, and the Stun Gun Hero takes out blocks of power with his quirk's abilities, leaving the streets and buildings drenched in darkness. During the ensuing fight, Red Riot is thrown through several large support beams, and Uravity holds the buildings steady with her quirk when they threaten to topple. A combination of events unfold that have the heroes leaving the area suddenly, although it's still unstable.
Without Uravity there to hold the damaged buildings, they inevitably fall.
The heroes involved blame the villains, and take none of the blame themselves. It's apparent from the footage, however, if they had stayed where they were and properly cleared civilians from the area before departing they could have saved dozens of lives.
No sooner had the evidence been uploaded, it was deleted and labeled as anti-hero propaganda. Fake, or at the very least altered to show the heroes in an incriminating light. Any time someone dared to question the incident in the following weeks it was immediately covered up, time and time again.
Midoriya, having witnessed the original footage with his own eyes, told Bakugou the details of that night immediately. Bakugou reassured Midoriya he would investigate, but even after weeks had passed the pro heroes still remained silent. Whenever questioned by the media, they parroted scripted statements blaming the villains alone for the lives that had been lost, taking no responsibility themselves, showing no remorse for their actions.
Bakugou did what he could to glean insight in an attempt to somehow begin to make things right, but in the end it was Midoriya who confronted the pro heroes about what had really happened.
He was shut down completely. Uravity and Chargebolt refused to talk about it at all, Red Riot expressing his condolences for Midoriya's loss, but choosing otherwise not to get involved. Even Froppy had nothing to say, no matter how badly it seemed as though she wanted to.
Midoriya could tell from their reactions that they had been instructed not to speak about what had truly happened by their higher ups, and so Midoriya escalated the situation, demanding the truth of that night be brought to light.
Instead of being heard, he was removed from his role as a pro hero supporter, and cast from their ranks. Those in charge of pro hero society saw him as a menace, purposefully threatening their reputation and inciting discord.
Bakugou was torn, unable to abandon his duties as the Number One Pro Hero, but also unable to let things lie knowing how Midoriya felt, knowing Midoriya's immeasurable loss.
Inko had always been kind to him, and treated him as family. It didn't sit well with him knowing that her death could have been prevented, if the heroes involved had simply evacuated the area rather than leaving an unstable scene.
Worst of all, due to the complexities of the situation, none of their pro hero friends attended Inko's funeral. Midoriya stopped considering them to be friends at all.
All he had left was Bakugou, and that didn't last very long.
"You need to say something." Midoriya whispered shakily, his hands balled tightly into fists. "You're Pro Hero Dynamight. People know you. People trust you. They will listen to what you have to say."
"Izuku-" Bakugou began worriedly, watching Midoriya as he paced back and forth, his eyes red from crying, his taut shoulders trembling.
"You're the only one that can do this, Katsuki." Midoriya breathed out, blinking away tears as he met Bakugou's eyes, stepping towards him and taking one of his hands. "Please, I need you to do this for me. I need you to tell them what happened to mom. Tell them what happened to all those people that died that night. You have to. You have to-"
"Izuku, I can't. You're not listening." He took a deep breath as he held Midoriya's hands, exhaling slowly. "None of us can talk about what happened that night. We have to remain a united front. We can't show any signs of internal hemorrhaging. The villains are becoming more and more emboldened by the day, we cannot show anything that might signify weakness-"
"Katsuki, you have to!" Midoriya cried out sharply, clinging to his hand, his breath caught on a sob. "Mom's been buried for weeks and no one even knows how she died!"
He crushed the back of his hand against his mouth, sobbing against it miserably for a moment before forcing himself to continue on.
"No one knows what they took from me! They're just getting away with it! They haven't even said they're sorry!" He shook his head, scrubbing at his red cheeks and sobbing roughly. "I can't stand it! I can't stand it! They're supposed to be heroes - they said they were our friends!"
"They are our friends!" Bakugou insisted, tugging Midoriya closer gently, trying to catch his eyes. "What happened was an accident, Izuku. They made a terrible mistake-"
"They won't even admit it! They won't even say those words! I-" Midoriya choked and coughed, shaking his head, tears streaming down his face. "I can't forgive them! I can't move on! Not until they acknowledge it! Not until they admit what they've done, and apologize for it!"
Bakugou is quiet, and Midoriya sobs against his hands breathlessly. He cries and cries, until he tires himself out. When he's spent all his energy, his arms hang loosely at his side, and it's all he can do to remain upright, blinking slowly. Bakugou watches him quietly, then carefully reaches out to tug him closer, cradling Midoriya against his chest.
Midoriya rests his cheek against Bakugou's shoulder, and he whispers against the soft fabric of his worn blue shirt, "It's my fault. I couldn't save her."
Bakugou shushes him gently, rubbing up and down his back in slow, steady passes.
"If I wasn't Quirkless-"
"Stop." Bakugou whispers, and it's both gentle and broken. "If anything, it's my fault for not staying with you. I should have been there. Maybe I could have gotten her out alive."
Midoriya whimpers softly, clinging to Bakugou's shoulders, his nails biting sharply into warm, golden skin. He ducks his head, breathing in Bakugou's scent. He's tense all over, anxiety and grief gripping his core like a vice, iron chains constricting his heart and lungs.
"Breathe." Bakugou whispers, and Midoriya hiccups, sobs jerking his shoulders.
"I miss my mom!" He whispers miserably, and Bakugou swallows thickly, ducking his head. He hugs Midoriya a little closer, careful not to grip too tight.
"Breathe, Izuku. Breathe."
Midoriya struggles to follow Bakugou's words, fighting his own body, forcing himself to relax enough to finally inhale properly. When he does manage to take a breath, it's a series of painful gasps. It leaves him a sobbing, shuddering wreck curled up against Bakugou's chest, limp as a ragdoll.
"I've got you." Bakugou whispers, carding his fingers through Midoriya's messy curls. "I've got you, baby. I've got you. Just breathe."
"Please say something, Katsuki." Midoriya whimpers against his throat, hiding against the curve of his neck, clinging to his shoulders so hard his fingers ache.
Bakugou remains silent. All the heroes do. With each passing day Midoriya grows more and more distant, until one day he won't speak to Bakugou at all.
He disappears one night, and months pass by. When Bakugou sees him again he's not the same. He's fighting on the opposite side, allied with the villains against the pro heroes. He now possesses a quirk.
When Bakugou tries to speak to him, Midoriya refuses. When any of the other heroes attempt to communicate, Midoriya attacks them on sight.
Seasons change, months fade into years.
Midoriya's anger grows, along with his quirk. He's a powerful, formidable villain capable of unleashing limitless energy. Once he finally decides to stop holding back, he's nigh unstoppable.
He takes down Chargebolt first, then Uravity shortly after. He records it, their final interactions. He makes them beg, forces them to admit what they've done. He releases the recordings on all social media platforms, sends copies to every news media outlet. He makes sure this time that the entire world knows, that it can't be covered up.
He comes for Red Riot next, then Froppy. He lets them live, after he's gleaned their confessions. Red Riot was the only one who offered Midoriya his condolences, and Froppy apologizes sincerely in the end, begging for his forgiveness. Confessing her sincerest regrets.
He leaves Bakugou for last.
It takes months of lesser fights before they engage in their final altercation, their quirks quickly leveling buildings and decimating the surrounding streets for miles.
Since acquiring his quirk, Midoriya always takes care to choose an empty battlefield, selecting abandoned districts, or those that have been fully evacuated, before engaging in a no holds barred fight.
Bakugou is strong, stronger than Midoriya had realized when he stood on the sidelines as a support-class hero. Midoriya is stronger. He's sparred against god-tier villains for years now, on par with monsters like Dabi and Shigaraki. All For One knew well what he was doing when he accepted Midoriya into their ranks, and gifted him his own quirk.
Bakugou's explosions rain hellfire, igniting their surroundings into raging infernos, and Midoriya's lightning cuts through absolutely everything in his path. Bakugou seems almost surprised when Midoriya gains the upper hand, and he stops holding back, tries to regain what he's lost, but it's too late. Midoriya has him right where he wants him, and after hours of struggling the hero finally succumbs.
He forces Bakugou to his knees, standing over him with lightning crackling in his veins, anger knotted tightly in his throat, ready to strike a fatal blow.
Still, he needs Bakugou to say it. Needs to hear him admit what he's done before he can finish it. He doesn't record the confession this time, this moment is just for them.
He stares down at Bakugou, and Bakugou blinks away tears slowly, searching Midoriya's eyes.
"Say it." Midoriya whispers, gradually tightening his hold. "My patience is growing thin."
"I made a mistake." Bakugou whispers, his throat raw, his lungs fighting against the heavy ash in the air. "You were right. I should have said something. I should have told the world what really happened, as soon as they released that video. Everything just…"
He coughs roughly, trying to catch his breath. His tears leave streaks in the ash clinging to his cheeks.
"Everything became so convoluted so quickly. It was all about risk management, and media coverage, and politics."
He swallows thickly, taking a moment to inhale raggedly before licking across his chapped lips and continuing on.
"We should have been focusing on the victims instead, on all the ways we'd failed them. We could have done things so differently. We could have been so much better."
He's quiet for a moment, watching Midoriya carefully, then adds on in a trembling tone,
"Heroes should be held responsible for their mistakes, just like everyone. We aren't special, we're just human. Heroes aren't infallible, we're capable of making mistakes. Horrible, careless mistakes."
Bakugou closes his eyes for a brief moment, then opens them with fresh tears rolling down his dirty cheeks.
"I'm sorry Izuku. I'm sorry I betrayed your trust. I'm sorry I didn't speak up for Auntie. I loved her, and miss her so much. I think about her all the time, I think about you-"
"That's enough." Midoriya growls out, releasing his hold and taking a step back, exhaling a shaky breath while casting his eyes aside.
Bakugou's hurting and he knows it, both emotionally and physically. Despite everything, buried deep in the innermost chambers of his heart, there's a part of Midoriya that's grown tired of fighting.
That part of him misses the life he once held with Bakugou, when they had been happy together. When they had been very much in love.
There have been times over the years that spanned between Midoriya becoming a villain and their present moment when Bakugou has reached out to him, trying to convince him to come back home. Each and every time, Midoriya hasn't dared to consider accepting.
Now, after hearing Bakugou apologize for everything that has happened since his mother's death, he feels deflated. Worn thin. As if his anger has dissipated and left nothing behind but skin and bones. Years of animosity. Years of grief and regret, of being utterly alone.
He tilts his face towards the ashen skies, exhaling and closing his eyes, a small smile teasing up his lips.
"Do you remember the day you asked me if someday we'd get married?"
Bakugou is quiet, and Midoriya doesn't turn to face him, taking a few quiet steps across the rooftop, his eyes drifting over the burning skyscrapers in the distance.
"We were what, twenty? I was still living with mom, and you were talking about moving out of your parents' place, and finding an apartment in the city."
He laughs softly, his fingers twitching against nothing, an echo of the memory of their fingers entwined.
The sunshine is bright enough to nearly blind. Midoriya has to reach up and shield his eyes from the light to see Bakugou properly, his cheeks dusted with pink as he searches those crimson eyes.
"What did you say?"
"I mean…" Bakugou rubs at his nape, glancing away for a moment before meeting Midoriya's eyes again. "It makes the most sense, right? Living together?" He shrugs a little, trying not to let Midoriya see just how flustered he is at the thought. "We're always going to be together, so we should pick out an apartment that we both like."
"You want to move in together?" Midoriya asks, with a peal of laughter and a cheery smile. "Really, Kaachan?"
Bakugou clicks his tongue against his teeth, and he can't bring himself to meet Midoriya's eyes anymore, not with that telltale blush creeping along his cheeks. "Damn it, Deku. Why does it have to be such a big deal?" He casts his eyes towards Midoriya, searching for a quiet moment before asking in a softer tone, "Do you want to wake up to me every morning? For the rest of our lives?"
Midoriya's heart is fluttering in his chest, and suddenly he's light headed. He feels like he can't breathe.
"The rest of our lives?"
Bakugou turns to him, taking his wrist and tugging him closer, holding Midoriya's eyes.
"That's the plan, isn't it? Getting married someday?" Bakugou murmurs softly, his cheeks impossibly red. "You and me, forever?"
Midoriya laughs. He laughs and nods quickly, tears caught in his lashes, his heart trapped in his throat.
"Y-Yeah! Yeah, of course I want to! I want to wake up to you, every morning. I've never wanted anything so much."
Midoriya turns, looking back at Bakugou. He's still kneeling against the rooftop, and his head is bowed again. Midoriya pinches his brow a little, then draws closer, his voice softer than it was before.
"Katsuki?"
Bakugou doesn't look up, not yet. Midoriya simply watches him for a moment, then he kneels down beside him quietly. His eyes are on the dark splotches of blood marring Bakugou's torn hero suit, on the puddle that's slowly expanding beneath him, littered with falling ash.
Midoriya smooths his fingertips against the thick layers of ash accumulating atop the rooftop, smearing it between his fingers, pale grey against tanned, freckled skin.
"Do you think we can ever go back?" Midoriya whispers, "To the way things were before?" He looks to Bakugou again, adding hesitantly. "Do you even want us to?"
Bakugou doesn't respond, and Midoriya worries his lip between his teeth, watching him closely.
"Katsuki, can you look at me? Please?"
He reaches out his hand slowly, hesitantly resting it against Bakugou's shoulder, and that's all it takes to have him slumping forward, heavy and limp in Midoriya's arms.
He's dead weight against Midoriya's chest, perfectly sculpted muscles and massive grenade gauntlets. He isn't breathing, no rise and fall of his chest. Midoriya never knew Bakugou could feel so cold.
"Katsuki? Katsuki?!" Midoriya shoves at him, shaking him, trying to rouse him. Bakugou's unresponsive, falling to the side with a loud clatter, Midoriya hunching over him and clawing away his armor, desperate to find a pulse.
There's something faintly there, weak and thready. Midoriya starts chest compressions and mouth to mouth, pushing air into Bakugou's lungs, willing him to breathe on his own again.
Flashes of memory from summers before, learning CPR at the beach. Following the lifeguard's instructions only half-seriously, muffling their laugher as they share soft kisses in the sand. Breathing in each other's air, traces of sea salt and watermelon on their lips. Endless golden sands, a warm, gentle sun. The sound of waves lapping against the beach, of gulls calling somewhere far overhead.
He's still not breathing, no matter how much air Midoriya pushes past his lips. He resumes compressions, tears streaming down his face as he calls out to him, calls his name over and over again. Willing Bakugou to come back to him, begging not to be left behind.
A small palm presses against the glass of an aquarium tank, wide eyes watching the sharks circling within with something between awe and fear. His mother squeezes his hand, and Midoriya looks up at her as she smiles and points to the smaller fish near the corals, the blue tangs and clownfish, butterflyfish and moorish idols.
His eyes drift along the corals, smiling while pointing out things he recognizes. His mother smiles down at him, laughing brightly as she claps her hands together, praising him for remembering so much.
There's another boy nearby, about his age. He's grinning from ear to ear, both hands pressed against the glass as one of the sharks draws close. His mother and father are standing nearby, arguing amongst themselves quietly. He doesn't hear them, too focused on the massive great white floating before him, only inches of glass separating them from touching. He bares his tiny canines and lifts his hands, letting out a mighty growl, clearly unafraid of the shark. Midoriya watches him in awe.
"I want to be brave." Midoriya whispers, and Inko kneels down beside him, giving him a hug.
"You are brave!" She whispers, nuzzling her nose against his freckled cheek. "One day, when you're all grown up, you're going to be a hero! Then, you'll be so very brave, won't be afraid of anything!"
"I'm afraid of this!" Midoriya sobs, trying his best not to lose his rhythm, continuing compressions desperately, doing everything he can to bring Bakugou back. "Don't leave me! Don't leave! You promised! You promised me, Katsuki! Please don't leave me!"
Lightning gathers in his palms, and sends branches of emerald through Bakugou's chest, Midoriya sobbing uncontrollably.
"I don't want to be alone anymore!"
He's weakened from fighting. The brawl has taken more out of him that he originally realized, and as the lightning fades he slumps slightly to the side, unable to catch his breath.
He chose this. He left Bakugou behind. He turned to a life of villainy in order to avenge his mom. Now that he'd accomplished everything he wanted, he realized how much he'd truly lost.
He'd killed his friends. He'd ripped a gaping chasm into hero society, one that might prove to be incapable of repairing for years to come. His actions would leave heroes and civilians alike vulnerable to the League. He was supposed to be a hero. He was supposed to defend and protect. Now, looking back on the last few years, he realized how hypocritical he'd become.
He'd unleashed everything he had bottled up inside of him during their last fight, and now Bakugou was dying because of him. All because of him.
What would his mother think of him if she could see him now? If she could see just how far he'd fallen?
He's gasping for air, his shoulders twitching. He's hyperventilating and he knows it, but he can't take a breath, can't force his body to uncoil enough to inhale like it needs to. He tries to swallow, but finds he can't. The edges of his vision start going fuzzy and dark.
Something bumps against his knee, and he hears Bakugou whisper hoarsely, "Breathe for me, Izuku. Breathe for me."
Midoriya gasps in a breath and reaches for Bakugou's hand, crying as he clings to his fingers, bowing his head to crush Bakugou's hand against his brow.
"I'm sorry!" Midoriya forces out between shuddering breaths, his body convulsing involuntarily. "I'm so sorry, Katsuki! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to do this to you! I didn't-"
"It's okay." Bakugou whispers, and his hand is warm, it's so warm.
He feels another hand on his shoulder, gentle and familiar. It feels like coming home.
"You've been so brave." Inko whispers, and Midoriya laughs through his tears and nods his head, tilting his face up so his mom can press a kiss to his forehead, carding her fingers through his messy curls. "I made lunch for both of you, boys. Come now, come sit at the table. Mitsuki said she'll be coming 'round to pick up Katsuki just past noon. We still have a little time before then."
Bakugou looks up from the picture book he's been studying since they left the aquarium that morning, grabbing his stuffed dolphin and running across the living room, Midoriya pushing himself up from the carpet to follow after. They climb into their chairs, sitting side by side. They always do. They're impossibly close.
Midoriya has aquarium stickers dotted all across the front of his shirt, orcas and manta rays, seahorses and starfish. Bakugou has cartoon sharks tattooed up both his tiny arms and one on his cheek, and he sets his dolphin on the table between them before flashing Midoriya an impish smile.
"Look at these!" Bakugou laughs, flexing his upper arm, gesturing to one of the larger press-on tattoos. "When I'm a grown up, I'm going to get a real one! Just like the one at the big tank!"
Midoriya's eyes are wide, and he nods solemnly, clinging to Bakugou's every word. "You're amazing, Kaachan! It'll look so cool!"
Bakugou laughs again, and he's older now, holding Midoriya's hand as he flexes his painted bicep. "Well? What do you think? Pretty cool, huh?"
"I mean, it's not a shark. It's a dolphin." Midoriya teases, Bakugou huffing and rolling his eyes, Midoriya laughing merrily as he's tugged away from the painting booth towards the caramel corn and cotton candy carts, looking up at the ferris wheel as they pass by. "Ooh, I want to ride that one next! Can we, Kaachan?"
"Maybe." Bakugou teases, flashing a playful grin over his shoulder. "If you can admit my dolphin's actually super cool." He lifts his arm again, flexing his bicep purposefully. "It's way cooler than a shark, right?"
Midoriya hums softly, reaching out to run his fingers through Bakugou's disheveled hair. He's half-asleep, watching a documentary about the migratory patterns of humpback whales, blinking sleepily as he stifles a yawn.
Midoriya cuddles closer, wrapping his arms around Bakugou's shoulders, murmuring quietly against his hair, "Time for bed? It's past midnight. You have patrol in the morning."
"Just a little longer." Bakugou murmurs back, taking one of Midoriya's hands and kissing across his knuckles, carefully smoothing his fingertips across Midoriya's scattered scars. "Want to spend time with you."
Midoriya's chest twists, and he blinks back tears, swallowing thickly. There are moments like this when Bakugou shows him such sweetness it takes his breath away. It makes his heart soar.
"Izuku?" Bakugou whispers, and though Midoriya can feel him standing close to his side, somehow he feels far away.
Midoriya turns to face him, meeting Bakugou's eyes, and Bakugou gives him a warm, gentle smile, offering out his hand.
"Come on," he whispers, "It's time to go."
Midoriya nods, his chest fluttering, and they step out from behind the tall velvet curtains together side by side. They make their way towards the podium, walking hand in hand, bathed in gold beneath the blinding stage lights.
It's such a short drive to get to the touch tank,
To you, deep sea pearl, my soft manta ray…
Tender two fingers to touch the display,
I used to dive deep 'til I got splashed in the face…
He's so pretty when he goes down on me,
Gold-skinned eager baby, blue shirt out the laundry…
He tells me he's gentle when he wants to be,
So I think he wants to be gentle with me…
You took my breath away
So now I can't suck in my stomach around you anymore…
We're too old to live with our parents,
Do you wanna wake up to me every morning?
Lyrics: Touch Tank by Quinnie
Thanks for reading! More to come!
