Author's Note: It has been WAY too long since I've written Zephyr and Nuffink! Alajdlfjaslfjaskfldafsfad, why do I allow this stuff to happen!? *Looks at self in mirror* You are a despicable human being, Moon. How dare you not write Hiccup and Astrid's children in thirteen months.
Yeah, I'll make sure to give myself a good whack across the head for that one...*Sighs* Thankfully, I had this idea sitting in my mind for a while, and I FINALLY got to write it over my hiatus sooo...Yeah! I hope you guys enjoy it! ^u^
An Arm and a Leg
His kids were smart, and he knew that for a fact. But sometimes, Hiccup thought that they were a little too smart for their age.
The days Zephyr and Nuffink were born were without a doubt the happiest days of Hiccup's life next to meeting Toothless and finally marrying his love, Astrid Hofferson. The two little bundles of joy were pleasant to be around, and Hiccup still found himself—on occasion—wallowing in the shock that he was a father. A father! A parent to who he believed to be the best children on Odin's green earth.
The firstborn and next in line to become chief was Zephyr. She was only six and yet she was already tinkering and inventing things in the forge alongside her father. Hiccup saw a lot of himself in her; she often had a sarcastic attitude and was rather down-to-earth. She wasn't interested in what most viking children were at the age of six. While other children took up the art of hunting and battle, Zephyr preferred to invent and create. She had a journal in which she sketched her drawings and observations quite frequently, and her round, blue eyes that she inherited from Astrid were always open to finding new discoveries and learning more about the world around her. Zephyr loved a good adventure, and she spent a lot of her time venturing through the woods with her little brother Nuffink, whom she called her "applicable assistant" whenever the two collaborated on projects or games.
Nuffink Haddock was what Hiccup would call the opposite of Zephyr. Unlike his sister, Nuffink loved derring-do, weaponry, and anything that involved action. He was like a newborn Scuttleclaw, always running around the house at the speed of a Speedstinger, being just as loud and rowdy as the Terrible Terrors that used to line the rooftops. Whenever he got his hands on a weapon, the young boy was inclined to use it, though he knew well enough not to mess around with Astrid's axe. Nuffink was a rambunctious three-year-old, whom Astrid claimed she saw a lot of herself in. She didn't mind if Nuffink managed to equip himself with a dagger or play the rougher games with the other children of New Berk. He was a tough little fellow, Astrid had said. She had even promised that she'd start teaching him combat once he was around Zephyr's age.
Despite his children's differences, both children shared a love for dragons and were both extremely competitive—something that he insisted was an Astrid trait despite the former-Hofferson's objections. Zephyr and Nuffink got along just swell, and the two rarely argued. And when they did, they always apologized to each other, so Hiccup was confident whenever he told those who asked if his kids were good or bad, that they were—without a doubt—good kids. They were bright with intelligence and bubbling with curiosity. They enjoyed learning new things and kept up with their studies whenever it was time for schooling. Hiccup knew that the two were clever, but he didn't know just how clever they could be until a trip to the markets sparked a rather interesting predicament.
Every few weeks, either Hiccup or Astrid took a trip down to the market to restock food and supplies. Mostly food, since there wasn't any use for weapons anymore now that battles and violence had significantly depleted since the departure of dragons. There were no new dragon warlords or psychopathic, power-hungry men looking for world domination. Things had grown increasingly calm since the dragons had left, which left Hiccup feeling a mix of pleasure…and a little bit morose.
Of course, Hiccup was glad that the dragons were safe. And the number of dangers and crimes had lessened now that no one was fighting to control any rare species of dragon. But Hiccup deeply missed his best friend Toothless, the six years that they spent together seemed so short now that he was gone. Hiccup longed to see his Night Fury again, and he had talked about taking a trip to the Hidden World with Astrid. He needed to show his kids how he became who he was that day. Astrid liked the idea, but she suggested that they wait until Zephyr and Nuffink were older for a three-day boat trip, which Hiccup agreed on.
But for now, he was focused on bringing up the village of New Berk and raising his kids Zephyr and Nuffink, who had tagged along with him on his trip to the markets. The stands and booths were packed with vikings looking for food and supplies. The traders had stopped by too, and many villagers were positioned near their tables, bartering and trading their most beloved items for trinkets and things that held a further value. Today was the perfect day to go shopping, and though Hiccup didn't necessarily like searching for groceries, he knew that they were low on food back in the Haddock hut, and Astrid was in desperate need of a new set of knives since Zephyr and Nuffink had dulled all the other ones while creating a trap for trolls.
Zephyr skipped at Hiccup's side, and Nuffink was perched on his shoulders, pointing out everything that caught his eye. The little boy had never seen so many people packed in one place, and he couldn't label everything that was being displayed. Nuffink knew his foods, of course, but when it came to rarer items like silk, gemstones, jewelry, and other foreign materials, he completely drew a blank, causing his curiosity to pique to heights higher than a mountain.
"Ooh, what's that, Daddy?" Nuffink asked, pointing to a stand displaying a wide array of colorful fabrics. Before Hiccup could answer, Nuffink gasped and turned to another stand filled with the shiniest looking of jewels. "And what are those?"
"Those are decorative blankets, Nuffink," Zephyr answered thoughtfully. "And those things over there are jewelry. You know, like the necklaces that Mom sometimes wears at those special meetings at the Great Hall."
"Ooooooh," Nuffink said in awe. Hiccup smiled in amusement. "They look pretty. Can I have one?"
"When are you going to wear it?" asked Zephyr. "You don't like bracelets, and you hardly ever wear necklaces."
"I have a dragon tooth necklace," said Nuffink, lifting the Terrible Terror tooth looped on a brown rope that hung contently around his neck.
"Yeah, but that's not jewelry," Zephyr stated bluntly.
Nuffink frowned, and Hiccup stepped in. "Maybe you should stick with the dragon tooth, for now, Nuff. And you can always borrow one of Mom's necklaces."
Nuffink instantly brightened again. "Aw, yeah! Then I can bury it and pretend it's a treasure!"
"You can bury Mommy's necklaces!" exclaimed Zephyr. "You'll lose it!"
"I will not!" shot back Nuffink. "I'll dig it up once I find it again."
Zephyr blew her auburn bangs out of her eyes and shook her head. "Sometimes, I just don't get you."
Nuffink didn't reply, as his focus was once again on the multiple stands and tables lined with items that he had never seen before. His emerald-green eyes sparkled with wonder, and Zephyr scoffed.
"He has the attention span of a sparrow, and he can barely keep track of his own toys. How does he expect to remember where he buried a necklace?" Zephyr said, gesticulating with her hands.
Hiccup laughed, finding Zephyr's statement rather amusing. "He could always write down where he left it."
"Nuffink doesn't know how to spell yet," stated Zephyr.
Hiccup shrugged. "Then I guess we're going to have to keep your mother's necklaces out of reach from him."
Zephyr nodded, satisfied. "Agreed."
"So, what are we here for?" asked Nuffink, patting his hands against Hiccup's auburn-colored hair.
Hiccup looked down at the shopping list, which Astrid had hastily written down since she had a meeting to attend at the Great Hall. "Just some fruits, meats, and vegetables. Nothing much really."
"The food booths are down over there," said Zephyr, pointing straight ahead. "But it may take a while to get there. There's a lot of people."
"Thank Thor that it isn't Black Plague Friday," Hiccup muttered to himself as he and his kids made their way through the crowd. The chief of Berk was still reviewing the items over the list, and he didn't notice Zephyr, who suddenly stopped in her tracks. Her eyes widened as she spotted something that she oh so desperately wanted sitting on the table of a booth just a few feet away from her, Nuffink, and Hiccup.
Noticing that his daughter was no longer following them, Hiccup turned around, noticing the longing look in her eyes. Tilting his head, Hiccup asked, "Zeph? What's up?"
Zephyr turned to Hiccup and pointed at the nearby booth. "I need that."
Following her finger, both Nuffink and Hiccup turned to what appeared to be a blacksmith's booth. Gobber wasn't managing it; he was busy at the forge, but he wasn't the only blacksmith around. Even though he would never admit it, Gobber was getting older, so some kind vikings had volunteered to take up blacksmithing, just so that Gobber wasn't piled with so much work to do.
Hiccup knew the viking who was managing the booth that Zephyr was pointing to, but what his eyes landed on was the peculiar contraption that lay in the center of the table display. It was an interesting trinket; a wooden box with buttons that appeared to cause different tools to pop out of the little kit. The man was giving a demonstration, and many vikings were awed by the object. It seemed that most were there just to see how it worked, for no one made a move to purchase it yet, and Zephyr was more than glad for that.
The little girl bounced on her heels. "I could get so many intentions made with that toolbox thing! And I wouldn't have to spend time looking for separate ones because they'll all be right there! Can I get it, can I get it, please, please, pleaseeee, Dad?!"
Hiccup looked at the invention, then back at Zephyr, who was doing the look that she did whenever she was begging for something. She looked so similar to Toothless whenever he pleaded for extra fish, that Hiccup found it practically impossible to say no.
"Well…I guess we can go and check it out," he replied. Zephyr grinned, but from his shoulders, Nuffink gasped.
"I want something too!" he blurted. "It's not fair if only Zephyr gets something!"
"We can share it, Nuffink," said Zephyr, giddy with delight. "We'll take turns."
Nuffink seemed satisfied by this, and he argued no more as he, Hiccup, and Zephyr made their way to the blacksmith stand. The last group of vikings had just left, so it was only Hiccup, Zephyr, and Nuffink present at the booth.
The man at the stand looked up, seeing that he had customers. He smiled. "Ah, Chief! Welcome! What can I do for yeh? Are yeh lookin' for something in particular?"
"Just that doohickey," answered Hiccup, pointing to the toolbox lying on the table between them.
"Ah, this thing!" the man said with a flourish. As he lifted it, Zephyr's eyes followed it. She bounced on her heels in excitement. Nuffink didn't seem all too excited, but he watched with interest. "Don't know who invented it, but it sure is useful! All yeh do is push these buttons, and whatever tool yeh need pops right out! Yeh won't lose any of yer tools with this thing on yer hands!"
As he pushed the buttons to demonstrate, Zephyr grew even more elated. "It's so cool!" she proclaimed.
"It sure is," said the man, winking at her. He turned to Hiccup. "So, would yeh like to make the purchase?"
"Sure, how much is it?" asked Hiccup, ready to pull out the pouch of coins attached to his belt. His hand froze, however, when the man bellowed out the price.
"Forty gold coins!" he answered. Hiccup's eyebrows shot up.
"Forty?" he spluttered. Zephyr looked up at him, confused. "That's…crazy expensive!"
The man nodded in agreement. "Yes it is, but the materials used to make this thing are incredibly hard to find. And there aren't many of these lyin' around anymore. The price wasn't my decision to make."
"That's understandable," said Hiccup, dropping his hand to his side. "It's a remarkable invention…just a little out of my price range."
Hiccup turned to Zephyr, whose mood had dampened upon realizing that the item she wanted wasn't in their budget. "Sorry, Zeph. It costs an arm and a leg…We'll come back to it some other time."
Zephyr sighed. "Okay…"
Hiccup turned to the man. "Thanks for the demonstration."
"Anytime, Chief. Have a good rest of your day," the man said politely. Hiccup nodded, and he led his kids back into the mix of the market. Seeing that Zephyr still looked a little upset, he said, "Hey, once we're done shopping why don't we go see what Gobber's been up to? I heard that he was working on something that you may find interesting."
"Is it a cannonball launcher?" Nuffink asked excitedly.
"I don't think so, Nuff," said Hiccup with a small laugh. "But whatever it is, it'll probably be intriguing."
For a moment, Zephyr seemed like she'd say no. Then she brightened, and her smile returned. "Okay! It's been a while since we've seen Gobber anyway."
Hiccup smiled and took her hand, but little did he know that other ideas were running through the little girl's mind. Ideas that were so very Zephyr.
…
After collecting everything that was on the shopping list and stopping by the forge to visit Gobber, Hiccup and his family returned home and cooked a nice dinner before turning in for the night. Hiccup had a chief meeting to attend the next morning, so Astrid would be staying home with the kids. Hiccup didn't think that the day would go awry when he woke up. He'd only be at the Great Hall for a few hours before returning home, and the Great Hall wasn't that far anyway, so it wouldn't be like he'd left the island.
As Hiccup sat up, he found that Astrid was already out of bed. She was an early bird, and Hiccup could hear her grunts as she practiced with her axe outside. Astrid never stopped training with her axe, and the Chief remembered how she'd gone out to Raven Point with Stormfly to train when they were younger. The memory felt warm, and so distant and long ago. Hiccup still had trouble believing that the dragons were actually gone…
Pulling himself out of his pensive thoughts, Hiccup bent down to grab his prosthetic leg. He blinked in surprise when found that—oddly—the metal leg wasn't in its usual place.
Slowly, Hiccup drew his hand back from the empty place where his prosthetic should've been lying, bemusement written on his face. Surely he had placed it there last night, hadn't he? Luckily, he always kept a spare, so Hiccup opened the draw to his bedside table, expecting to find the second metal leg sitting inside. Unfortunately, it wasn't.
"What in the world…?" Hiccup muttered to himself. He decided to get his clothes on before resuming the hunt for his metal leg. It was a good thing that he left them folded on a chair nearby, for Hiccup didn't feel like hobbling over to the closet. Once his tunic and pants were on, Astrid walked into the room, her brow beaded with sweat and her two long braids falling out of their ties. Despite her frazzled appearance, she still looked beautiful to Hiccup.
"Hey," Astrid greeted cheerfully. She tilted her head, a puzzled expression on her face. "Shouldn't you be getting ready to leave?"
"I should," said Hiccup. He gestured to the space where his leg should've been. "But I can't find my leg."
Astrid blinked, befuddled even further. "Oh? I saw it there last night. Where could it have disappeared to?"
"That's the thing I don't know," Hiccup said, getting to his feet—er, foot. Astrid set her axe aside and supported him. "Maybe it's downstairs…Or one of the kids moved it. But I need to find it soon, the meeting starts in two hours."
"I'm pretty sure Zephyr and Nuffink are still sleeping right now," said Astrid. "We can search downstairs. Maybe you left it there?"
"Maybe," Hiccup repeated, and the two headed down the stairs and into the living room, where there were plenty of places for a prosthetic leg to hide. Astrid and Hiccup searched under the couches and pillows, beneath the rug, and in between the little nooks and crannies but they didn't find the false appendage. They checked the kitchen, office, and closets and still, there was nothing.
"Where is it?" asked Hiccup once he and Astrid regrouped near the front door. "I swear I left it right next to my bed!"
"We'll find it, don't worry," said Astrid. She placed her hands on her hips. "Just retrace your steps from yesterday…You may have misplaced it somewhere you were at."
Hiccup seriously doubted that, since he rarely ever misplaced anything. But he decided to do what Astrid suggested since he didn't know where else to look. "Okay…I woke up, the sun was shining, and birds were singing on the roof. I put on my leg, went downstairs, got some chief work done in the office…And then Zeph, Nuff, and I went to the markets to get groceries."
"You had your leg on during that entire time," remarked Astrid. "Where did you go?"
"Well, we did stop at—"
Suddenly, the door burst open, causing Hiccup and Astrid to jump in shock. Barreling in came Gobber, who looked rather flustered.
"You can't knock?" asked Astrid, trying to get her panicked breathing under control.
Ignoring the question, Gobber exclaimed, "My hand! I can't find my hand!"
"Ah…Isn't it attached to your arm?" asked Hiccup. "Well, the left one that is."
Gobber shot his former apprentice a look. "Not that hand, the other one!" Gobber lifted his right arm, which only had the metal holder where he usually placed his interchangeable hands. "It's gone!"
"I thought you had multiple of them," said Astrid.
"But I need the regular one!" Gobber exclaimed. "The hook hand! I can't get any work done without it!"
"Well, Hiccup, it looks like you're not the only one who lost a limb," jived Astrid with a small, amused smirk. Hiccup, however, was unamused. Astrid shook her head and continued. "Do you know where you last saw it, Gobber? Maybe you and Hiccup left your lost limbs in the same place."
"I doubt that," Gobber said. "Hiccup had his leg when he stopped at the Forge the other day with the little lad and lass."
Hiccup pursed his lips in thought. Zephyr and Nuffink had accompanied him to the Forge yesterday…Perhaps they knew the whereabouts of his prosthetic leg.
"Maybe we should ask the kids," said Astrid. "I'm sure they know at least something."
"They should be up by now, actually," Hiccup remarked. He turned toward the stairs, where he had heard nothing from Zephyr and Nuffink's shared bedroom. "Strange that we haven't heard anything…"
"I'll go see if they're up," said Astrid, walking toward the stairs. "I'll be right back."
As she headed upstairs, Gobber continued to dramatically mourn over the loss of his hook hand. Hiccup reassured him that they'd find it, although Gobber didn't seem to take his words to mind. Hiccup sighed, eventually giving up. Gobber could be quite dramatic over the littlest of things. Like baths.
Astrid came running down the stairs, her eyes wide with panic. "They kids….They're gone!"
"What?!" Hiccup exclaimed. Gobber looked just as surprised.
"Their beds are empty," explained Astrid in a rush. "They must've…woken up early to explore or something, but I have no idea where they could've gone—!"
"They couldn't have gone far," said Hiccup. "We can head down into the village and ask if anyone has—"
And that was when everything clicked into place.
The missing leg.
Missing hand.
Zephyr and Nuffink getting up early.
Hiccup blinked. Then he blinked again.
"Oh, dear gods."
…
"Wait, wait, I'm confused, why are we going to the markets?" asked Astrid, trying to balance Hiccup as she tried matching his strides. For a viking on one leg, he sure was fast. Gobber hobbled behind them. "Did you leave your leg here?"
"No," replied Hiccup, not even making eye contact. "The kids brought it here."
"What?" asked Astrid, even more puzzled. Hiccup eventually stopped walking, and he pointed at one of the booths. The blacksmith booth.
"There," he said simply. Astrid and Gobber looked where he was pointing, and sure enough, Zephyr and Nuffink were standing there. Hiccup's two missing legs and Gobber's hook hand sitting on the table. The same man that they had met the other day appeared to be in deep surprise as Zephyr spoke to him.
"These are two of Dad's legs and one of Gobber's interchangeable hands," she explained in a professional tone, as she was bartering with a trader. "We didn't have forty coins the other day, but Dad said that that's the equivalent to an arm and a leg. Gobber's hand isn't really an arm, but a hand is attached to an arm, so it should still cover the cost."
Hiccup facepalmed. Gobber watched in amusement. It took Astrid a little bit of time to process what was going on, but once she did, she began to laugh harder than Stoick the Vast.
"They…They actually thought…They didn't…Oh my Thor, our kids!" Astrid chortled, holding her stomach as she laughed.
"I have to admit though…That is pretty genius," remarked Gobber, chuckling himself.
Hiccup sighed and shook his head. "I knew they were smart…but this? I wasn't expecting this," he said.
Astrid continued to laugh, and the man from the stand looked up, looking at Hiccup. He nodded slightly toward Zephyr and Nuffink, who were still waiting for a reply. Again, Hiccup sighed.
"I should probably go and clear this up," he said. The auburn-haired viking turned to Astrid. "Ast…Do you mind getting me over there?"
Still giggling, Astrid allowed Hiccup to use herself as a support, and as he and his wife headed over to the little stand, Hiccup made a mental note to make Zephyr and Nuffink's next schooling lesson about the usage of human expressions
Author's Note: Alright, alright, so I know Gobber's hand isn't an arm, but like Zephyr said, the hand is attached to it, so that's my excuse. You can't argue with Hiccup's daughter. No way, no how. X)
Anyway...I hope you guys enjoyed this silly little one-shot! (And I do deeply apologize for not giving these two kiddos any spotlight for so looooong, ahhhhh TwT).
Until the next story! =D
~BeyondTheMoon1203
