Chapter 1: Party in the basement
Larry Wilcox felt so giddy as he drank his champagne in the volcanoes of hell. He was so excited to be in this eternal party of the afterlife. He was glad that none of the theists were around to bother him. Those losers were so annoying!
A number of musicians that had been cast into hell were going to be playing another song. Larry peered through the crowd and smiled, knowing that he would get to enjoy all of this literally forever.
Larry thought about his old job as a Global Community guard. It had been such a stressful job, trying to find members of the Young Tribulation Force. Those kids literally made he and the other Global Community officials working on their case look bad. They were a laughing stock thanks to their tricks.
Larry knew that the Global Community would eventually have him eliminated. That's why he tried to find members of the Young Tribulation Force and report them. Unfortunately, Larry had drank water that he didn't know was poisoned. The water caused his stomach to feel cycles of pain and he was in so much agony in his last moments. Well, he was in hell, and would never have to worry about God trying to punish him again.
Larry sat down, sipped his drink, and watched the musicians as they entertained the numerous and vast crowds in hell. This literally was so entertaining.
