[Q paces in midair above homeroom 108.]

Q: What can I do to make this more entertaining?

[Q muses for a few moments, then a light bulb (yet again) lights up over his head.]

Q: Voila! What makes for good teen (even though they aren't between the ages of 13 and 19) drama? A huge test!

[Q pauses for another moment.]

Q: A final! This is going to be great!

[Q prepares the final exam in each class.]

Q: Now we begin again...

[All of our favorite characters sit in homeroom. All of them...Jean-Luc, Will, Geordi...you get it they're all there.]

Data: Geordi, make me a "paper airplane."

Geordi: Why?

Data: I have to watch you do it to learn it. You know, "monkey see, monkey do."

Geordi: Stop using common metaphors. It's annoying.

[Geordi makes a paper airplane under the watchful eye of Data.]

Geordi: You throw it.

Data: Okay.

[Data throws the airplane. It hits Tasha squarely in the back of the head.]

Tasha: Hey!

Data: Sorry.

Will: Jean-Luc, throw one. It's amusing. Twenty bucks says I can hit Beverly...

Jean-Luc: Fine.

[Jean-Luc folds a paper airplane and throws it. The airplane hits the person walking into the door.]

Wesley: Who threw the airplane?

[Silence.]

Wesley: If the guilty student doesn't come forward soon, I'll make the entire class fail their finals.

[More silence.]

Random student: What are you doing here, Mr. Crusher?

Wesley: Your teacher is ill. Budget problems prevented the use of a substitute today.

Guinan (whispers): Beverly, are you and the principal related?

Beverly: NO.

Wesley: Miss Crusher, am I to assume that you threw the paper airplane?

[Q2 appears next to Q; everything freezes.]

Q2: Wouldn't she be "Miss Howard?"

Q: Hmmm...good point. I don't feel like changing it though. Go home.

[Q2 just leaves. Everything else resumes its proper course.]

Beverly: No sir.

Wesley: Well, talking during my lecture is also insubordination of the same kind. I, however, am feeling particularly generous today. Don't do it again.

Beverly: Okay.

Wesley: Anyway-

[The Pledge of Allegiance cuts Wesley off. Then announcements last until the bell. Bell rings, and the class vacates the room.]

[The entire gang sits at the same table (not in homeroom, dumbass) at lunch. Deanna and Will are feeding each other, while Beverly reads a play. Tasha is reading a book and Guinan is trying to pry Worf's childhood out of him. Geordi and Data are discussing Geordi's crush, Leah Parker. Jean- Luc is actually eating.]

Geordi: Data, I just can't go up to her and introduce myself. She'll think I'm an idiot.

Beverly (under her breath): That's for sure.

Geordi: What Bev?

Beverly: Nothing, just thinking aloud.

Jean-Luc: Which play are you reading?

Beverly: Hamlet by Shakespeare. (Fanfiction.net won't accept my underline. I do respect the work however. So pretend it's underlined.)

Jean-Luc: I know.

[Tasha, who has been half-listening to the conversation, buts in.]

Tasha: If you knew what she was reading, why did you ask?

Geordi: Damn, you're blonde.

Tasha: I resent that; it's stereotyping.

Geordi: People stereotype me all the time, y'all, just because I'm black.

Data: We do not.

[Sensing the uncomfortable situation brewing, Deanna speaks up.]

Deanna: Everyone's worried about finals.

Geordi: Why shouldn't we be?

Tasha: Yeah, finals are the hardest tests of the year.

Deanna: Maybe we should all study tonight.

Will: That's a good idea, but I'm not disciplined enough to study.

[Will demonstrates this point by initiating a mating ritual with Deanna. She shrugs him off.]

Deanna: We know that.

Guinan: I can make sure we all stay awake tonight...I've got enough to share. And one dose is only ten dollars, just for you guys.

Jean-Luc: Uh, no thanks.

Worf: The use of drugs to facilitate study is dishonorable.

Guinan: You won't be preaching from that bible later.

Deanna: Why don't we all gather at my house tonight and study together? We're in all the same classes, so why not?

Will: That's a great idea. (To Deanna): I won't bring condoms.

Deanna: WILL! That's not what's going to happen tonight.

Will: Sure.

Deanna: We are all going to STUDY. Nothing more. Be at my house at seven.

[The group provides a chorus of affirmatives.]

Guinan: Worf, why are you so quiet?

Worf: Beverly is quiet, yet you do not inquire as to why she is.

Guinan: That's not what I mean. We all know Bev is just asocial.

Beverly: Am not.

Guinan: Whatever. Seriously Worf, why?

Worf: My upbringing taught me to be respectful of all those speaking.

Guinan: Right.

[Bell rings. Everyone splits up to travel to his or her respective classes.]

[Later, at the Troi residence, everyone is sitting with his or her books on Deanna's coffee table. No one seems to be interested in studying, however. They want excitement.]

Tasha: This is boring.

Geordi: Hate to say it but she's right.

Guinan: Since when do you talk like you're educated?

Geordi: I decided to begin changing my image, that's since when.

Guinan: Oh. Deanna, do you have something to drink?

Deanna: Sure, it's in the fridge.

[Guinan gets up and walks into the kitchen.]

Guinan: Anyone want anything?

[Everyone yells out what they want. Oddly, each person has a thirst that needs quenching. A few minutes later, Guinan returns with glasses of white liquid.]

Beverly: That's not what I wanted.

Guinan: Yes it is; you just haven't realized it yet.

[She dispenses the glasses. Everyone takes tentative sips.]

Deanna: This is wine!

Guinan: So?

Deanna: My mother will never let me live if she finds out I've been drinking!

Jean-Luc: Who cares about your mother?

[Deanna gasps.]

Deanna: How dare you?

[Jean-Luc smiles. Everyone still sips their drinks, even though they know the nature of the substance.]

Will: I have to defend my lady.

[Will just sits and drinks more wine.]

Guinan: More?

[Everyone nods. She brings back some tequila.]

Guinan: Sorry, we're out of wine.

[Everyone still sips. Studies are forgotten.]

Worf: I was a lonely child. I didn't think anyone loved me. I wanted to go back to that planet with the rest of the Klingons.

[Beverly moves to sit next to Jean-Luc.]

Beverly: Really Worf?

Worf: Really.

Tasha: This is what I call a party. More alcohol, serving wench.

Guinan: Coming right up.

[Will takes a huge gulp of tequila and stands up and stumbles over to Jean- Luc, who has his arm around Beverly.]

Will: Upon further consideration, I've decided to beat you up. I've never liked you.

Jean-Luc: Never?

Will: Well, I liked you until you insulted Deanna.

[Will throws a punch in midair and completely misses Jean-Luc, who is still sitting. Will walks back to his spot next to Deanna. Jean-Luc picks up his math book.]

Jean-Luc: Prepare to die, bitch.

[Jean-Luc aims at Will's head and tosses his book. Jean-Luc's aim is true and Will hits the ground. Deanna kneels next to him and plays nurse. Jean- Luc leans over and gives Beverly a long victory kiss.]

Tasha: Data, let's go into a more private room...

[Data and Tasha leave.]

Geordi: Can I come with you?

Guinan: They're going to have sex loser. That means that Data doesn't need you.

Worf: I feel like singing "A British Tar."

[Upon hearing the word "British," Jean-Luc breaks his kiss with Beverly and stands with Worf to sing.]

Jean-Luc and Worf: A British tar is a...

[Both fall to the ground laughing. Everything freezes again.]

Q: Now this is what I'm talking about.

[Time resumes.]

Beverly: Jean-Luc, let's get back to what we were doing...

[No one has noticed that Deanna and Will are making out on the floor. Just as Beverly and Jean-Luc get comfortable, Worf passes out, and Guinan refills her 20th drink, Luwaxana Troi enters via the front door.]

Troi: What in the fifth house is going on here?

[She kicks Deanna and Will, throws wine onto Jean-Luc and Beverly to break them up, acknowledges that Worf is out cold, and takes the bottle from Guinan's hand.]

Troi: All right, get out; get out all of you!

[Silence. Muffled noises come from the bedroom.]

Troi: Who in the hell is in my bedroom?

[She goes back and opens the door. A few screams are heard. Soon Data and Tasha leave the room, followed by Luwaxana.]

Troi: All of you leave my house immediately. No wait, I'm calling your parents.

[Everyone sits down and waits. Soon angry parents come and pick up their soon-to-be-dead kids.]

[Meanwhile, Q sits in complete stitches.]

Q: I can't wait for the verbal reprimands!

(I don't own Trek or any part of it. Hope you enjoyed this part. R/R!)