Alas, the final chapter. I will try to make this one a long one...doesn't
this feel like watching the last episode of a series? Feels like you're
doing everything for the last time. *sob*
Disclaimer: I own only the storyline. Everything else is Paramount's.
[Our beloved cast is located outside of the school. Badly painted signs adorn the sidewalk as police approach the very few protesters.]
Officer 1: I heard that there was a public disturbance taking place. Where is it?
Tasha: Disturbance?
Officer 2: A protest, in layman's terms.
Beverly: THIS is the protest.
Officer 1: Oh really? It looks as if you're hardly trying.
Worf: It is not honorable to insult others' freedom of speech.
Officer 1: I don't think protesting falls under freedom of speech in the Constitution.
Officer 2: And just what are you protesting?
Will: Bras.
Deanna: Will!
Jean-Luc: We're protesting the school's use of money, and how the cuts affect students.
Officer 2: This is odd. Normally, a school official would be here, trying to regulate the crowd.
Officer 1: There isn't a crowd. It doesn't seem that the school even minds that these students are out here.
Officer 2: Well then...who called us?
[Data steps forward.]
Data: I did.
Beverly: Data! We're not supposed to call, the school is!
Data: In every record of protests I have read, the law intervenes. When an appropriate law enforcement agency did not arrive, I assumed the responsibility of calling.
Geordi: That's our Data!
Officer 1: You realize we can't possibly arrest you.
Officer 2: We have no charges to bring up.
Officer 1: We'd look like idiots.
[Guinan puts her arms around the officer's shoulders and stands in between them.]
Guinan: Gentlemen, gentlemen. I've got something that will make you see it our way.
[Guinan pulls out some drugs, which, last time I checked, are illegal.]
Officer 1: We can't arrest for the protest. We CAN arrest for these.
[Officer 1 puts Guinan in handcuffs and Officer 2 takes the drugs and puts them in an evidence bag.]
Geordi: Damn, they got her!
[The Officers shove Guinan into a police car and leave.]
Tasha: Let's go scrounge up some bail money.
Data (in Sherlock Holmes voice): Yes, we shall free the fair Guinan from her confinement.
Tasha: Stop that.
[Q pauses the scene.]
Q: Like so many other projects I begin, I grow bored of this one. I shall end this story now. Or close to now...
[Q begins time again.]
[In the cafeteria, the gang tries to get money for Guinan's release. They are in groups: Bev and Jean-Luc, Will and Deanna, Tasha and Data, Worf and Geordi.]
[Beverly and Jean-Luc try their luck first.]
Beverly: Hey, do you have any spare change?
Jane Doe: No, I don't. I'm too POOR to have change.
[Jane runs away crying.]
Jean-Luc: Beverly, let me try.
Jean-Luc: Do you have any extra money?
Allen Chase: No, but I've got an extra condom. Want it? Looks like you and you're girlfriend haven't been satisfied in a while.
Jean-Luc: No thanks.
[We go to see how Will and Deanna are doing.]
Will: Hey, you got any money?
Billy Joe Bob: Nope. I ain't got no cash.
Deanna: Thanks anyway. (to Will) Will, how are we ever going to find any money to free Guinan?
Billy Joe Bob: Y'all say "Guinan?"
Deanna: Yes.
Billy Joe Bob: When Guinan's in trouble, I come to get her an'at. Here, have all of my money.
[Billy Joe Bob gives Will five dollars.]
Will: Thank you for your contribution.
[Now to check up on Tasha and Data.]
Tasha: Emily, do you have any money?
Emily: What's it for?
Data: Guinan is in jail. She has been imprisoned. We must free her. So, should we not pay bail?
Emily: I don't know, I've never been there.
Tasha: Do you or do you not have a bit of money to give.
Emily: Sure! Why not!
[Emily pulls a five out of her wallet and gives it to Tasha.]
Emily: So glad I could help!!!!
[Finally, Geordi and Worf. How are they doing?]
Worf: I do not think it is honorable to beg for money off of others.
Geordi: Do it for Guinan.
[They approach a table.]
Amanda: What do you want?
Worf: We are collecting funds to release our friend from prison.
Amanda: I don't give out money.
Geordi: But the slammer must be awful...just like you.
Amanda: Wait! My horoscope DID say to be generous today...all right, I'll spare one penny.
[All of the cast meet up and add up their money.]
Will: We have a grand total of...ten dollars and one cent.
Beverly: That's not enough!
Jean-Luc: What do we do now?
Will: Let's ask Ryan Andrews.
Jean-Luc: Already did. Said he couldn't 'spare a pound.'
[Q pops in, but lets them see him.]
Q: Thus, this is the end of your adventures. You can't do anymore here, although you really tried. You're just too boring.
Will: How can you judge? You've got the worst hair cut in the universe!
Q: Damn straight.
[Q uses his fairy powers to send everyone back home. (including Guinan and Wes.)]
Q: And may they have no memory of this.
THE END.
Or is it?
I used a few people I know, as models for the students I apologize to them for making them look so bad. (Save Em, of course, she helped with her character.)
Disclaimer: I own only the storyline. Everything else is Paramount's.
[Our beloved cast is located outside of the school. Badly painted signs adorn the sidewalk as police approach the very few protesters.]
Officer 1: I heard that there was a public disturbance taking place. Where is it?
Tasha: Disturbance?
Officer 2: A protest, in layman's terms.
Beverly: THIS is the protest.
Officer 1: Oh really? It looks as if you're hardly trying.
Worf: It is not honorable to insult others' freedom of speech.
Officer 1: I don't think protesting falls under freedom of speech in the Constitution.
Officer 2: And just what are you protesting?
Will: Bras.
Deanna: Will!
Jean-Luc: We're protesting the school's use of money, and how the cuts affect students.
Officer 2: This is odd. Normally, a school official would be here, trying to regulate the crowd.
Officer 1: There isn't a crowd. It doesn't seem that the school even minds that these students are out here.
Officer 2: Well then...who called us?
[Data steps forward.]
Data: I did.
Beverly: Data! We're not supposed to call, the school is!
Data: In every record of protests I have read, the law intervenes. When an appropriate law enforcement agency did not arrive, I assumed the responsibility of calling.
Geordi: That's our Data!
Officer 1: You realize we can't possibly arrest you.
Officer 2: We have no charges to bring up.
Officer 1: We'd look like idiots.
[Guinan puts her arms around the officer's shoulders and stands in between them.]
Guinan: Gentlemen, gentlemen. I've got something that will make you see it our way.
[Guinan pulls out some drugs, which, last time I checked, are illegal.]
Officer 1: We can't arrest for the protest. We CAN arrest for these.
[Officer 1 puts Guinan in handcuffs and Officer 2 takes the drugs and puts them in an evidence bag.]
Geordi: Damn, they got her!
[The Officers shove Guinan into a police car and leave.]
Tasha: Let's go scrounge up some bail money.
Data (in Sherlock Holmes voice): Yes, we shall free the fair Guinan from her confinement.
Tasha: Stop that.
[Q pauses the scene.]
Q: Like so many other projects I begin, I grow bored of this one. I shall end this story now. Or close to now...
[Q begins time again.]
[In the cafeteria, the gang tries to get money for Guinan's release. They are in groups: Bev and Jean-Luc, Will and Deanna, Tasha and Data, Worf and Geordi.]
[Beverly and Jean-Luc try their luck first.]
Beverly: Hey, do you have any spare change?
Jane Doe: No, I don't. I'm too POOR to have change.
[Jane runs away crying.]
Jean-Luc: Beverly, let me try.
Jean-Luc: Do you have any extra money?
Allen Chase: No, but I've got an extra condom. Want it? Looks like you and you're girlfriend haven't been satisfied in a while.
Jean-Luc: No thanks.
[We go to see how Will and Deanna are doing.]
Will: Hey, you got any money?
Billy Joe Bob: Nope. I ain't got no cash.
Deanna: Thanks anyway. (to Will) Will, how are we ever going to find any money to free Guinan?
Billy Joe Bob: Y'all say "Guinan?"
Deanna: Yes.
Billy Joe Bob: When Guinan's in trouble, I come to get her an'at. Here, have all of my money.
[Billy Joe Bob gives Will five dollars.]
Will: Thank you for your contribution.
[Now to check up on Tasha and Data.]
Tasha: Emily, do you have any money?
Emily: What's it for?
Data: Guinan is in jail. She has been imprisoned. We must free her. So, should we not pay bail?
Emily: I don't know, I've never been there.
Tasha: Do you or do you not have a bit of money to give.
Emily: Sure! Why not!
[Emily pulls a five out of her wallet and gives it to Tasha.]
Emily: So glad I could help!!!!
[Finally, Geordi and Worf. How are they doing?]
Worf: I do not think it is honorable to beg for money off of others.
Geordi: Do it for Guinan.
[They approach a table.]
Amanda: What do you want?
Worf: We are collecting funds to release our friend from prison.
Amanda: I don't give out money.
Geordi: But the slammer must be awful...just like you.
Amanda: Wait! My horoscope DID say to be generous today...all right, I'll spare one penny.
[All of the cast meet up and add up their money.]
Will: We have a grand total of...ten dollars and one cent.
Beverly: That's not enough!
Jean-Luc: What do we do now?
Will: Let's ask Ryan Andrews.
Jean-Luc: Already did. Said he couldn't 'spare a pound.'
[Q pops in, but lets them see him.]
Q: Thus, this is the end of your adventures. You can't do anymore here, although you really tried. You're just too boring.
Will: How can you judge? You've got the worst hair cut in the universe!
Q: Damn straight.
[Q uses his fairy powers to send everyone back home. (including Guinan and Wes.)]
Q: And may they have no memory of this.
THE END.
Or is it?
I used a few people I know, as models for the students I apologize to them for making them look so bad. (Save Em, of course, she helped with her character.)
