R_M : I'mma listening to 'Eyes on Me' by Faye Wong . The song from FFVIII ... it's a good song ; I suggest you go listen to it on the part that Crawfie goes angsting . *LOL* ^__^;;; Well here's something yummy I bet you didn't expect ... have fun !

You might see an itsy bitsy part about Ayan ... now we couldn't forget all about him now could we ?

- - -

Crawford strode through the familiar white maze of halls determinedly , his mind in a tangle of thoughts .

He remembered his encounter with Mastermind yesterday , and corner of his mouth turned down in annoyance at the memory .

He had not even been able to talk to the bastard coherently ; just sedated him and watch him foam at the mouth .

Never mind , he was going to get through today and that was final . He was used to getting his way , and not even a cocky , insane sonuvabitch like Schuldich can keep him from it . And today , he was dead set on getting Schuldich to snap out of that idiotic misery he was in .

After all , it was no use wasting himself inside that cell when they still had Weiß to kill .

The strange thing was , that reason never justified itself to him . He had returned yesterday back to their building in confusion . He could not get his mind off the encounter with a deranged Schuldich . He could not deny to himself the fact that he had been afraid ... for the first time in a long , long while ; and he could not understand it .

Surely Schuldich's madness alone would not have made him feel that way ... Had it happened before , Crawford would have looked at him coldly , weighed his options and shot Schuldich on the head .

But now ...

Well , to be sure , he sympathized with the poor sod - in his own way ... but was it :just: that ?

He was turning the matter over and over in his head without reaching any acceptable conclusion . ::Why did he even care at all ? Was it all because of Schwarz ? Was it all because of the missions ? Or was it something deeper ?::

Ever since Schuldich had met Ken , he had become different . Less of what he was before , and more of another person .

He had seen a side of Schuldich that he had never seen before .

Gone was the cynic , the omnipotent-mindedness , the smart-ass potty mouth , the prying gossip ... and was replaced by a caring , sincere and considerate Schuldich .

The redhead had finally shown his vulnerable side after years of aloofness ; the part of him that he refused to show . He had dropped his mask to show the susceptible person inside ... for Ken .

It was something that even Crawford's powers could not sufficiently explain .

A random thought rose to his mind , unbidden . So vivid that he was almost there .

It was Mastermind and Siberian - in bed ... doing things he could not even begin to describe ...

And then he realized what that feeling of annoyance was all along ...
He had fallen ...
For Schuldich ...
- - -

The next few weeks was excruciating for both Schuldich and Crawford .

The American visited Schuldich precisely the same time each day like clockwork . He was never late and his routine nor did his demeanor vary .

After his fifth visit to Schuldich , he realized that the German could not remember anything about Ken . Maybe after all the raging and the violence ; his mind just shut down ; making him forget that gruesome part of his history . Maybe ...

Perhaps that was why Crawford was finally getting through to him - Because Schuldich had forgotten the source of all his pain .

Crawford had thought that that was fortunate . No ... not fortunate . It was an unexpected blessing

No ... even he couldn't bear to see Schuldich suffering more than he had to . He had a heart ; despite what everybody thought ... and that heart fractured a fraction every time he saw the redhead's pain .

And he intended to keep it that way .

For his sake .

For all their sakes .

- - -

The Koneko no Sumu Ie was just about to close shop . After the endless multitudes of girls coming to 'visit' , Aya was weary .

It was Saturday after all which was always the peak day of the week ... and they were short-handed ...

Yohji and Omi had already gone out for some take-out dinner , leaving Aya to himself . It was exactly what he needed ; some time alone . The two had never left his side ever since He had -

Shit ...

Even after three months he still couldn't forget Ken for five straight minutes .

So that was how long it's been ... He's been gone for that long ...

Aya sighed and turned towards the door . Manx hasn't been coming for a while now ; perhaps Persia had taken into consideration to the current dilemma and was mulling it over . Aya was glad for that ; he wasn't ready to go to missions yet . He wasn't ready to put the lives of what remained of his team on the line and make a mistake that could kill them all off .

No , not yet .

A strong gust of wind forced open the glass door , sending the chime tinkling melodiously .

:: Aya ... I love you::

Mauve eyes became dangerous slits . Aya was livid .

Damn that Schwarz bastard to hell ! How dare he mess with his mind !

:: I love you Ayan ... ::

*Ayan ? That was what Ken called him before ... before he ...*

" Ken ?" His croaked . His throat had gone dry , as if sandpaper was forced inside . " Ken ?!" His voice had pitched higher . He was in panic . Pale hands shook as he turned inside the shop ; flashing eyes searching for that one face ; that one form that he held so dear .

" KEN ?! Where are you ?!"

All of a sudden , the wind ceased and the door thundered shut , jolting him out of his delirium and making his world crash in fragments all around him .

:: Ayan ::

In all the months that Ken had been gone - Aya had never shed a single tear ...

... But three words made him truly remember what it was really like to lose someone you care for ...

::I love you Ken ... ::
- - -

R_M : Yes ... I know it was lame ... It was also longer than most chapters (except chapter seven) That would keep you satisfied till the next post ? ^^;

I'm soooo glad reviewers have come back to support my fic ! ^___^ I'm so happy ! *glomps all the reviewers* [ marsupial , dom , Whisper_Reilman , Anna_Hibiki , Misura and Suisei_Lady_Dragon ]

I'm glad to see fresh ... uh ... faces (?) Like dom , Anna_Hibiki , and Suisei_Lady_Dragon ^^; welcome to my twisted world !!! *laughs evilly* Keep on RnR'ing !!! ^^;;

Marsupial : Of course he was ! I'm not going to write a sequel without Ken in it ... he's much important to me for that ... after all , he's my reason for living (?) ... (.);; *sweatdrops at the drama*

Dom : I scare myself sometimes too ... he ... hehe ...

Whisper_Reilman : Actually ... Ken is in my bathroom right now and singing *Shindemo ii* in the shower . He's calling me , gotta go ... We're gonna take a bath together ... *winks winks* MWAHAHAHAHAHA !

Anna_Hibiki : I agree , Schu does deserve Ken more than Ayan (we're really close , Aya and I . First-name relationship) *LOL* *eyes widen at Anna kicking Ayan and rolls on the floor , laughing uncontrollably* You go girl !!! ^^;;

Misura : *bows at the compliment* I hope I'll be able to keep on surprising you as well . ^__~ ,,,,,,,,,, Suisei_Lady_Dragon : Thanks for saying that ! I appreciate it ! //(^__^)\\

R_M *cowers at all the threats thrown at her if she kills Ken off* Alright , alright ... I won't kill him off ... *gets a mischievous look* Although you didn't say - not to - torture him or anything ... Bwahahahahahahahahaha ... lemmesee about that ... Now how about torture in the shower ????? ... *gets bricked for being such a hentai* I AM NOT A HENTAI !!!!! o_X

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RNR !!!