~ Chapter 14 ~

I hate writing essays. They make me feel bad. (

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F

"Excuse me?" Rachel crossed her arms. "What the fuck did you just say to me?"

Michelle didn't waste time on speaking. Instead, she flew at the older girl and was yanked back by her collar just in time.

"What the freaking hell?!" shrieked Michelle as she was lifted a good three feet above the ground.

"Now, now, Michelle," said Boromir. "Calm down. I'm sure Stephanie's only joking."

"Joking about what?" asked Stephanie, the nasty look on her face gone, replaced by a wide eyed look of innocence. Once again, she was normal and disgustingly....happy.

"NOOOO!" wailed Michelle, thrashing wildly in midair. She punched the air with her fists, kicking an invisible foe. "TURN EVIL, STEPHIE! JOIN THE DARK SIDE! I DON'T CARE IF I HAVE TO FREAKING KILL YOU! DON'T BE HAPPY! ANYTHING BUT HAPPY! NOO!"

Stephanie blinked. "Pardon?"

Rachel sighed. "Well at least we know that she DOES have a darker side to her now," she pointed out dejectedly.

"Darker side?" gasped Stephanie, once again changing expressions. She looked horror-struck as she contemplated on having any personality other than her happy one. "Oh no! What happened?"

Katie was chewing her lip, smiling thoughtfully. "Y'know, guys," she said. "This would almost seem FUNNY if you looked at it a certain way. When Steph's normal, she sounds like Rachel when she's-" she paused. "Even MORE abnormal-"

"HEY!"

"But when RACHEL'S....less abnormal-"

"HEY!"

"She sounds like Steph when SHE'S normal," finished Katie.

"That kinda humour is known as IRONY, stupid!" spat Rachel, looking vicious. Ah well. At least they knew she was in her normal state of mind.

"I didn't know that Rachel could be any more abnormal," said Victoria thoughtfully. "What an interesting notion. Turn nice again, Rachel. I want to test Katie's theory."

"Yeah? Well you know what I want to test?" snarled Rachel. "How many lives you'll have left after I kill you!"

"Oh well," shrugged Victoria with a sigh. "It was worth a shot."

"Well YOU aren't worth ANYTHING!" Rachel flopped down on the ground, sitting cross-legged and scowling.

"Poor Rachel," giggled Christina. "Everyone's picking on her."

"Aw FUCK OFF, Chrissy-tina!" exploded Rachel. She grabbed a rock off the ground

A/N

Very handy things, rocks. You can shove 'em in peoples' (or hobbits') mouths to make them shut up, you can bash peoples' head open with them or you can simply hurl them at people. Be one with the rocks, people.

E/A/N

and threw it at Christina with all her might.

Christina squealed and ducked, shying away. The rock sailed over her and would have continued to fly a couple of metres had not there been an orc crouching behind Christina. As Christina ducked, the orc got up, raising his dagger and preparing to plunge it down on the quivering girl. Instead, the rock landed full in its face, ending its life with a definite *crunch*.

"Ew...." Rachel made a face as she stared at the orc. However, the others didn't waste any time in reacting to the death of the first orc.

"AMBUSH!" bellowed Aragorn.

"Gee....thanks, Einstein," murmured Rachel. "We'd be lost without you. Really, we would."

"Could you give the sarcasm a rest for just ONE MINUTE?" pleaded Victoria.

"Umm...." Rachel considered it. "Nope."

Boromir dropped Michelle on an orc's head and drew his own sword. "FIGHT, MEN!"

"Ya see?" Rachel gestured towards him. "What kinda instructions are those?"

"HAHA! DIE!" cackled Michelle, kicking an orc's head. "YAY! FIGHT KILL FIGHT!" Her eyes were filled with manic joy as she threw her head back, laughing evilly. "DIE, ORCIES!" Seizing a sword from a dead orc, she stabbed everything within range. "HEE HEE! FUN!"

Victoria watched the unfolding horror before her. "She's absolutely MAD," she gasped, referring to Michelle.

Rachel nodded. "Yeah. Squisho gone bad." Taking a deep breath, she pulled out her wand and began screaming as many curses as she knew at their attackers. Green beams shot everywhere in a tangle of emerald light. Everything the beams touched withered.

"Gee....that looks kinda fun," remarked Katie. "Me too!" She too hurled herself into the melee, using every trick she had learned in gym.

Christina was screaming at the top of her lungs. The Fellowship and her friends were used to the dreadful noise, and thus, it did not affect them. The orcs, however, were new to this caterwauling that poured from Christina's mouth and struggled to cover their ears, bellowing in pain.

Sighing, Victoria looked at Steph. "Well?" she asked. "I guess that leaves us, then."

Nodding wearily, the vegetarian pulled out her own wand, adding ruby lasers to Rachel's own display of light. Victoria grinned feebly and put her tae- kwon-doe lessons into use.

A

"YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS!" Angeline screamed at the locked door. "*GINO WILL COME RESCUE ME! YOU WAIT AND SEE, SARUMAN! HE'S IN YEAR ELEVEN AND HE'LL KICK YOUR BUTT!"

A/N

*Gino- Angeline's own 'Mister Perfect'. She's been arguing with Christina over who's the most perfect guy. Christina reckons it's- no, wait for it. David Flynn. A new name.

Quite frankly, I reckon they're both nuts. I've seen Flinnos and I reckon he very much resembles an overgrown hawk. As for 'Gino'....what a name.

E/A/N

When there was no answer, she calculated every law of physics that she had ever been taught and kicked the door in the weakest spot at the strongest angle. It shook, but did not give way. "LET ME OUT!"

Suddenly, the air in the room shimmered and seemed to part, revealing a tall, blonde woman. "Angeline? Do not be afraid. I am an image of Galadriel, the Elf Queen. I am here to warn you of the tragic circumstances that are about to unfold."

If Rachel had been there, she would have replied that the Elf Queen was a little late. However, as it was, Angeline nodded, looking very thoughtful. As usual. "I see. What circumstances exactly?"

"Your friends have joined up with the Fellowship of the Ring. They have been confronted by a troop of orcs and are being outnumbered faster than you can figure out a mathematical equation," explained Galadriel.

A/N

Okay, not something that little miss Fairy Elf might say, but hey. Gimme points for originality.

E/A/N

"Wow," said Angeline. "That's pretty fast."

"Yes," nodded Galadriel sadly. "Their strength is failing and the orcs continue to pour on them. Your friend, Christina's throat is sore. As Stephanie has run out of Soothers, Christina can no longer scream. Victoria is wearying and she needs rest. Tae-kwan-doe cannot stand against the forces of Saruman much longer, and she is only a yellow belt."

"WHAT?" gasped Angeline, outraged. "But she told me that she was a white belt!"

Galadriel cleared her throat. "Ah....yes. Well, you see, Angeline, a white belt is only the first rank of tae-kwan-doe. Yellow belt is the one above that, so obviously, Victoria has advanced to another level in-"

"Without telling me?" demanded Angeline, not appeased at all. "I need to know everything! I love knowledge!"

"Yes, yes," said Galadriel quickly. "Calm down, Angeline. The Fellowship is fighting bravely and your friends are standing by them firmly. However, if they remain any longer, they shall perish. The wizard, Gandalf has left the story for a bathroom break and some tea and biscuits. He is also seeking assistance from the elfs of the wood. He will not return in time to save the Fellowship, though. The Ring Bearer feels the pull of Sauron greater than ever. He must leave."

Angeline frowned. "But what has this got to do with ME? I'm stuck in this room. None of the spells work on these locks or walls and using physics to kick these walls cannot help me against stone which is quite unusual seeing that the femur is supposed to be harder than concrete or cement....something like that."

"Well, Angeline, you see it's like this," sighed Galadriel. "I CAN get you out of this room. After that, you have a two choices. You can either break into Saruman's Planning Rooms to steal his plans and take over to reverse everything that he has done. He has gone to finish the Scotch Fingers before Gandalf can get them, at the same time toying with your friends' personalities so that they have become opposites of their true selves. All this leavs you free to change his decisions here in his tower. OR, you can return to what you know as 'the real world' and find Gino. Your life will return to normality, but your friends will die here in Middle Earth. Now I shall free you from your prison. Choose wisely, Angeline." She raised her hands and blasted aside the door with a burst of power. Just before disappearing, however, she turned and faced Angeline. "Quite frankly, I don't know how you can stand those little pyschos. Goodbye, Angeline."

"Goodbye, Galadriel!" called Angeline as the Elf vanished into shimmering air.

Then she was left alone, with her choices.

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Lovely long chapter for you all. Happy? I'm meant to be writing my debating speech, but I'm sacrificing the debate against SCEGGS for this story.

Please- I'm begging you- PLEEZ review.