Chapter 18
Dear Diary, My life is so turbulent now I feel like as though I've been sucked into a giant tornado, and deposited days later on some deserted beach. I've discovered the man I lusted after so heavily, the man I had prepared to change my entire being for, is none other than my father. A cruel man who has done unspeakable things to those I love. The man must be some devil, for in all the time my mother has known him, he has never aged. Even now he looks as he did some twenty years ago. What does that make me I wonder? The devil's spawn? Has the same twist of fate which has cursed me with his face, his vanity, cursed me with something so evil, so inhuman that someday I will become as he his and destroy the ones I love? Before I came to the tiny town of Collinsport Maine, I was selfish, and ignorant, and through the weeks, the days, I feel I have become a genuinely good person. Will that be taken away from me? So many unanswered questions, so many fears, and doubts. Who would possibly know the answers? Who can I go to for help? Yes, I know, and I will go to him. I will see Barnabas and discover what is to become of me.
"Rhiannon, please don't go back there. Now that I've found you again...." Carolyn Stoddard Loomis trailed off teary-eyed. "I have to, I know that he is the only one who can help me. Now that I know who I am, I have to find out what I am. If I'm like him, if I ever will be. I'll come back after I've seem Barnabas and talked to my- parents. You'll have Nancy here, and I won't be long, I promise. I won't let him take me away from you like he did Nancy. I believe that however vile and cruel he is, he wouldn't hurt his own daughter."
Dear Diary, My life is so turbulent now I feel like as though I've been sucked into a giant tornado, and deposited days later on some deserted beach. I've discovered the man I lusted after so heavily, the man I had prepared to change my entire being for, is none other than my father. A cruel man who has done unspeakable things to those I love. The man must be some devil, for in all the time my mother has known him, he has never aged. Even now he looks as he did some twenty years ago. What does that make me I wonder? The devil's spawn? Has the same twist of fate which has cursed me with his face, his vanity, cursed me with something so evil, so inhuman that someday I will become as he his and destroy the ones I love? Before I came to the tiny town of Collinsport Maine, I was selfish, and ignorant, and through the weeks, the days, I feel I have become a genuinely good person. Will that be taken away from me? So many unanswered questions, so many fears, and doubts. Who would possibly know the answers? Who can I go to for help? Yes, I know, and I will go to him. I will see Barnabas and discover what is to become of me.
"Rhiannon, please don't go back there. Now that I've found you again...." Carolyn Stoddard Loomis trailed off teary-eyed. "I have to, I know that he is the only one who can help me. Now that I know who I am, I have to find out what I am. If I'm like him, if I ever will be. I'll come back after I've seem Barnabas and talked to my- parents. You'll have Nancy here, and I won't be long, I promise. I won't let him take me away from you like he did Nancy. I believe that however vile and cruel he is, he wouldn't hurt his own daughter."
