Disclaimer: Consider me disclaimed.

"How are you on this lovely morning Emily?"

Emily was embarrassed. She hadn't gotten much sleep and she knew that she didn't look her best. "I'm fine Phil. How are you?"

"Very well, thank you for asking. Will you be joining us for breakfast? Everyone else is already downstairs in the dining hall."

"Sure! I just need to freshen up a little."

Phil smiled. "And what about Miss Lina? Will she be joining us?"

"I think so. She had a rough night last night."

Phil nodded. "Everyone did. Did you know that the man who attacked your mother last night disappeared? After we left, the guards went to take him into custody if he was still alive but he was gone."

Emily swallowed nervously. She thought back to her fight with Vance. "Really? Well, maybe his body was incinerated. Yeah. I'll bet that's what happened."

"You're probably right. Breakfast will be served whenever you're ready."

"Thanks. I'll see if my mom wants any and be down in a minute." Emily smiled sweetly and reentered her bedroom. Her smile disappeared as soon as she closed the door. This could get tricky. She whispered, "Mom?"

Lina continued to snore.

Emily cleared her throat. "Mom, there's breakfast downstairs."

Lina's eyes shot open. "Breakfast?" She tried to sit up but discovered that she had been tied to the bed. "What the hell?"

"Mom, please don't hurt me okay? I had to tie you up."

Lina growled. "I suggest you untie me immediately."

Emily was on her knees. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I did it in self- defense!"

Lina thought back to when Amelia had claimed the same thing so many years ago. "Was I tossing and turning?"

"Uh, more or less."

"What's that supposed to mean? By the way, you still haven't untied me."

Emily moved cautiously over to the bed. "Well, you were getting. . .clingy." She coughed. "I think you were having a pretty nice dream about dad." She started to untie Lina.

"Oh. Sorry." Once Lina was freed, she sprung on Emily and clamped her in a headlock. "Don't ever do that again."

"Ack! I'm sorry! Like I said, it was self-defense! You were squeezing me so hard I couldn't breathe!"

"Kind of like right now huh?" Lina twisted a little harder. "You won't do that again, will you?"

Emily shook her head.

Lina dropped Emily unceremoniously onto the floor. "Good. Now let's eat!"

"Hmm. A lead on a fragment? Interesting." Zelgadis sipped his tea. "When are we leaving?"

Amelia looked sad. "So, I guess you're all leaving already, huh?"

Lina glanced at Zelgadis nervously. "No, no! That's okay Zel. It's probably nothing anyway. Emily and I can handle it. The rest of you can stay here with Amelia."

Phil looked up at the mention of Emily's name. "Emily, are you leaving?"

Emily smiled at him. "For a little while. I should be back in a few days at the most though."

Zelgadis shrugged. "Whatever you say Lina. Amelia, do you think you could arrange for me to meet with Edward? I'd like to see if he'd show me his collection."

"I might be able to. Usually, he's terribly busy though."

"Yeah, that's right." Lina looked around. "Where is the jerk anyway? Is he too good to eat with the guests?"

Amelia sounded hurt. "Miss Lina, please. Edward's been very busy lately. The Elmikian ambassador is in the castle you know."

Lina snorted. "Oh, so the ambassador's been here for a couple years now right? What's the excuse when he's not seeing ambassadors?"

Amelia was silent and wouldn't meet Lina's gaze.

Phil cleared his throat. "Miss Lina, please don't say such things. The man is my father after all."

"Whatever. I'll bet you as soon as he finds out that Zelgadis is interested in his collection, he'll suddenly find some time to talk to him." With that being said, Lina dove into her second plate of bacon.

Zelgadis thought back to breakfast. As much as he hated to admit it, Lina had been right. He was sitting in a rather comfortable chair waiting for Edward to arrive.

The moment Edward had heard that Zelgadis was interested in his collection, he had cancelled a meeting to show it off.

The more Zelgadis thought about it the angrier he got. This man obviously didn't know what a treasure he had in Amelia. The fact that he wouldn't spend time with her while making time for a total stranger was unbelievable. He slammed his fist down on the arm of the chair leaving a dent in the wood. "Bastard."

"Excuse me?"

Zelgadis turned to see Phil looking at him with a concerned expression on his face.

"Is something wrong, Mr. Greywords? I know you've been waiting a while, but please bear with my father. He's trying to fit you into his schedule as best he can."

Zelgadis nodded. "And what brings you here?"

"I was just passing by and thought you might like some company."

Zelgadis gestured to another chair next to his. "Care to sit?"

It was strange. Zelgadis didn't really get along with people, but for some reason, he found himself liking the young Phil. He supposed it was because the man was intelligent and quiet, both traits that Zelgadis admired.

Phil nodded and took a seat. "Did you enjoy breakfast?"

Zelgadis nodded. "I suppose." He didn't add the fact that he had one cup of tea and couldn't even taste that anyway.

"That's good. You know Mr. Greywords, it's really wonderful that you and Miss Lina have come to visit. I haven't seen my mother this happy in years."

"Really?" Zelgadis didn't want to hear about how Amelia was miserable all the time. It just brought back the idea that it was his fault that she wasn't happy. He had gotten more than enough of that from Lina.

"I was wondering if you could tell me something, sir."

Zelgadis nodded. He had a pretty good idea of what it was Phil wanted to know.

Phil leaned closer to Zelgadis and lowered his voice. "What was my mother like when she was younger? She said she met you when she was fourteen."

Zelgadis shut his eyes. Memories of Amelia as a young girl came flooding back to him. Every laugh, every smile, every stupid justice speech. Justice. "Tell me something Phil. Does your mother still believe in justice?"

Phil hesitated. "Well. . .Grandfather used to tell me stories about it all the time. He said that justice always triumphs in the end."

Zelgadis shook his head irritably. "That's not what I asked, Phil. Please don't try to change the subject. Does Amelia still believe in justice?"

There was a long pause. "Mother. . .doesn't really believe in much anything anymore. Grandfather said that she used to be a warrior of justice. Now she's just. . .sad. She told me once that justice wasn't for everyone. She said that sometimes injustice has to be accepted by some so that the majority can enjoy peace. Do you know what that means sir?"

Zelgadis mutely shook his head. In his mind he was replaying what Amelia had said the previous night.

"I married him because it was good for relations between our kingdoms. . .and because I love him of course."

Zelgadis grimaced. He muttered, "No." Amelia had never believed that she would be with anyone but him. And she had thrown her future away when he hadn't returned to her. He really was a monster. "No!"

Phil looked concerned. "Mr. Greywords? Are you alright?"

Zelgadis looked up. He forced a smile. "I'm fine. Maybe I had a bit too much to eat at breakfast. What were you saying?"

"You were going to tell me what mother was like when she was younger."

"Oh, right. When I first knew Amelia, she was an overly chatty, lively, and loving girl."

Phil smiled. "That sounds nice."

Zelgadis grinned at Phil. "I couldn't stand her. She was the antithesis of everything I was at the time. Brooding, depressed, and spiteful." He looked down at his hands. "Everything that I still am."

Phil shook his head. "I don't think that you're as bad as all that, sir."

Zelgadis chuckled. "You're in pretty exclusive company then. Just like your mother. Anyway, the more I tried to snub her, the nicer she was to me. More than any of my other friends, she dragged me kicking and screaming into a somewhat normal life. For a while anyway."

"So what happened?"

Zelgadis thought for a moment. "I made a decision. I chose to live in hell rather then risk the possibility of being happy."

"A hell you know is preferable to a heaven you don't."

Zelgadis looked at Phil for a moment with a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Or so I've read anyway." Phil shrugged.

"You are well read aren't you? That's exactly it. I was too much of a coward to seize happiness when I had the opportunity. Now my days are filled with regret. Regret about what might have been. Regret about what never was." Zelgadis sighed. "Life has passed me by Phil."

"That's not true sir! I mean look at you. You're about fifty years old, correct?"

Zelgadis nodded. "About that age, yes."

"But look at you! You look as healthy as any young man. You have plenty of years left in you. Probably more than anyone else for that matter. How can you say that life has passed you by? You're still in your prime!"

Zelgadis chuckled. "I believe you're missing the point my friend. It's true that I'm in perfect health. In fact, based on my calculations, I'll be in perfect health for another couple millenniums. 'In my prime' as you put it."

Phil's jaw dropped. "Sir, are you joking?"

"Not at all. I'm only a third mortal. Everything else about me is timeless."

"Well, I have to ask again. If you know that you have that much time available to you, how can you say that life is passing you by?"

"Look around you Phil. What do you see?"

Phil looked confused. "I don't know. Am I missing something?"

Zelgadis shook his head and smiled. "No Phil. You've missed nothing. I have. Do you know what I see when I look around?"

Phil shook his head. "I can't say that I do, sir."

"I see my friend Lina Inverse as a middle-aged woman. Granted, her power will probably sustain far beyond the life span of a normal human but time will eventually catch up to her. The same for you and Emily, the new generation. And your generation's children." Zelgadis thought of Gourry. "Time eventually overtakes us all you know."

Phil nodded. "I think I understand. Except for you, right?"

"That's right. Long after the deaths of everyone I know and their children I'll be here. Kingdoms will fall, including Seyruun I might add, to be replaced by new kingdoms and empires." Zelgadis leaned forward until he was inches away from Phil. "You see? Everything I love is a mere speck of sand in the hourglass of time. It's slipping through my fingers and I'm powerless to stop it."

Phil spoke to himself as much as Zelgadis. "What a horrible life to lead."

Zelgadis sighed. "I'm sorry to burden you with this. Maybe I did it because I like you. I haven't discussed this with anyone else."

Phil tried to smile. "Thank you, sir."

Zelgadis shook his head vehemently. "Don't thank me! I'm not finished. More likely I did it because of my selfish nature. I have to make my mark, so that I can know that I did affect something. It's like footprints in the sand at the beach though. Everything will be washed away in time."

"I'm afraid I don't quite follow you."

"Normal people can deal with it a little better. Their lives are so short that they disappear before their memory does. Let's use you as an example. Do you write Phil?"

Phil looked disturbed. "What? Yes, actually I am working on some magical research material."

Zelgadis nodded and put his hand on Phil's shoulder. "You see? That's good. That's part of your legacy. Your 'mark' if you will." He tightened his grip on Phil's shoulder and stared at him intently.

Phil found that, as much as he wanted to, he was unable to look away from Zelgadis.

"But I tell you now that I will live to see the last copy of your work crumble to dust. You will be forgotten. You just won't be around to care. That's the blessing of the human life span. You struggle your entire life to accomplish something and you're not there to see it lost." He released Phil and crossed his arms.

Phil swallowed. "That's a pretty. . .bleak outlook you have sir."

Zelgadis shrugged. "What can I say? It's a bleak world."

There was a long moment of silence between them. Phil looked like he was struggling to deal with what Zelgadis had told him. Zelgadis just looked somewhat depressed.

"Sir, I noticed that mother was upset to see you yesterday. But as the evening wore on, you both seemed to open up. Did you. . .love my mother once?"

Zelgadis looked up at him surprised. "Yes, I suppose I did. I probably still do. Otherwise, I think that the pain wouldn't be quite so unbearable."

Phil was about to respond when a cold voice interrupted him.

"Son, what are you bothering my guest about?"

Phil looked up to see Edward standing in the doorway.

"I was just asking him about mother in her youth father. They traveled together for several years."

Edward sighed and shook his head. "I'm sure that Mr. Greywords has far better things to do with his time than listen to your foolish questions."

Zelgadis glared at Edward. "Not at all. I have nothing but time on my hands and your son has been a fine host for the past hour." He stood and smoothed out his cloak. "Thank you for sparing me some of your valuable time Prince Phillionel." He bowed deeply to Phil.

"It was my. . .pleasure, Mr. Greywords. Enjoy your visit with my father." Phil was visibly shaken as he left the room.

Edward watched him leave with a scowl on his face. "I'll never understand that boy. Wasting all of his time in the library. He's just as bad as his mother."

Luckily, Zelgadis was able to conceal the fury on his face before Edward turned to face him. "I'm not sure about that. Without scholars, who would record the history of great rulers such as yourself?"

Edward frowned. Was he being insulted? "If you'll follow me, I'm sure that you'll find my collection most interesting." He ushered Zelgadis out into the hall and closed the door behind him.

Next Chapter: Zelgadis is close to recovering another fragment of the Soul Render, but can he tolerate Edward for long enough to recover it?

Notes: I really, really liked this chapter. I've been looking for a way to justify Zelgadis's actions and I hope I did a decent job of it. The dialogue of this chapter came really easily and I'm pretty pleased with it. Not a happy chapter, but as I said, I love it. I guess I'm just a melancholy guy.

Stara, you're STILL reading this?! What do I have to do to get rid of you? Just kidding! Thanks for taking the time to comment on my story three times. A lot of what you've discussed in your reviews is being worked into the rewrite of the story. Glad you liked the E/L interaction and the comedy too! I must be on a roll! One question though. What did you think of the romantic elements? I was really nervous about that part. Thanks a bunch for your comments!

I'd love to have more input though. If anyone thinks that there's any plot holes, or anything else that could be improved please don't hesitate to tell me. I want to make this the best story that I can and it's a lot easier with feedback. Thanks again for reading everyone!