Chapter 3

Back upstairs, Slimer's caffeine frenzy had simmered down. He flew into the room and dripped coffee all over the carpet.

"That's gonna leave a stain."

The others nodded in agreement.

Slimer babbled the closest thing to the word "sorry", and then flew off to find something to clean up, leaving more coffee trails on the floor.

"Leave it, Slimer. Janine will be here any minute, so..."

The roar of a car engine interrupted Egon halfway.

Roland looked out the window and watched Janine's car pull up. "Egon? What does Janine feel about dogs?"

"Hmm......I never thought of that...." Egon shrugged. "I suppose we'll just have to wait and see."

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Janine's eyes followed the long black-brown snake that zigzagged, twisted and swirled all over the firehouse. "Joy. I just take a day off to see my folks, and what happens?"

The drop of cold coffee that landed with an audible smack on the table wasn't very helpful in answering her question.

"That's it. I'm getting a mop."

Janine retrieved the cleaning tool of her choice and headed for the kitchen. Kylie was still there with her now-empty glass, coffee-stained paper towels, and the still-damp-but-reasonably-clean black German Shepherd.

Janine stared at the dog.

The dog stared at Janine.

Egon and the boys had just come down, and could only stand by and watch.

Kylie cleared her throat nervously, believing the best but expecting the worst. "Err....Janine, meet Sidus."

Janine let out a shriek that hit the roof, causing half of it to come falling down and smashing the television in the living room. Then she raised her mop and made merciless but futile attempts to bash the dog into a bloody pile of bones and innards. When she realized that her plan wasn't working, she grabbed the first proton pack she could find and started shooting the poor animal, causing more parts of the firehouse to come crashing down. After she had crushed the pooch under a pile of concrete, she turned on Kylie for even saying anything.

In some isolated-from-the-world shrine, there was much prayer for the team's survival.....

Actually, good readers, that is what my father would have done. I just couldn't resist. Ahehehehehe......

-- Slick BlackWolf

In An Alternate Universe:

LENG TFC: SLICK!!! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!

Slick BlackWolf 'eeps' and runs for his life, with LENG The Flying Chocobo in hot pursuit.

LENG TFC: I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE ZAKI'S KID BROTHER! TOUCH MY PENTIUM® PROCESSOR AND DIE!!!!!!

What happened to him is someone else's business.

Back to the story.

What Janine really did was smile and look at the professor in that I-know-your-secret-but-I'm-not-mad-at-you way.

"Oh Egon, you didn't."

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

#SIDUS POV#

Looks the Motherly One finally shows up. Now that foul wet pain to my nerves is going to be history.

What would these guys do without her? Whatever she says, goes.

She's nice for an Alpha Female. I'd admit to that much.

The Fatherly One has just finished explaining to her where I had come from, where I might go in the possible future, and where I would be staying until then.

"Of course he can stay!"

/That sounded pretty.....enthusiastic/

"So he won't bother you, Janine?"

"Are you kidding? I love dogs!"

/Whoops. Secret's out./

The Motherly One looks at me like a lovesick pup. "Besides, who could object to such a cute little sweetheart like him?"

CUTE?

LITTLE?

SWEETHEART?!

I'm not CUTE, I'm not LITTLE, and I'm definitely not a SWEETHEART!!

I'm supposed to be VICIOUS! I'm the one who proved the Stupid One sounded feminine!

Wait a minute........

Uh oh.........

I start to beat a retreat, but she catches me 2½ seconds before I can reach safety zone.

Now she has her arms around me in what I call a death-grip and what she calls a hug. "Aww, come to Mama cutie!"

WARK!!!

My ribs!!!!

She's crushing them into a million cells!!!!!

Kylie!! Anybody!! Help me!!

......h-e-l-p.....m-e........

The Stupid One is laughing at me. I don't blame him. After all, he hates me and I hate him. But the others are also laughing, if not smiling.

Et tu, Kylie?

Traitors.

GASP!!

NO!!!

My lungs! My heart!! They're NEXT!!!

Everything's turning black!!! My body's going numb!!!

TAKE ME NOW, GABRIEL!!!!!!!!!!!!

#END OF SIDUS POV#

"Err...Janine?"

"Yes?"

"Umm....I think you should put him down now. He looks like he could use some air."

"Huh? Oh."

Janine released her hold on Sidus. The dog, too intent on trying to squirm out of her grasp, simply slipped and landed on the floor with a loud thud.

With the pride and dignity of a sprayed cockroach, Sidus yelped and scuttled into the living room with tail between legs.

Janine was completely clueless. "What's the matter with him?"

"Might be psychological behavior." Egon was looking at an "All About Dogs" book that was collecting dust in a shabby corner of his book collection. How it got there, we will never know. "Although Alsatians are known to enjoy human company, some canines just do not like to be cuddled."

"Naw. The dog's just shy! He'll be back for more in a while!" Eduardo had enjoyed himself watching the dog freak out.

He wasn't cruel or anything. He was just enjoying a ½ minute of indirect payback.

Right on cue, the German Shepherd reappeared at the doorway. He had something in his mouth, which probably tasted good to him as he growled with pleasure.

Eduardo jumped nearly a foot in the air. "Surrender my homework NOW, mutt!"

Sidus zipped away with a crazed Eduardo in hot pursuit. The others watched in stunned silence.

"Eduardo actually did his homework? I thought it wasn't humanely possible."

"Ever since we were dragged into the ghost busting business, nothing's humanely possible."

More silence.

Janine picked up the neglected mop on the floor. "I don't suppose any of you would want to help me clean up?"

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

#SIDUS POV#

Just because I don't blame the Stupid One, doesn't mean I can't give him an injustice transfer.

"Alright doggy boy! SHOW YOURSELF!"

There's the Stupid One right now. Ooh. He's got one of those shiny green-shooting thingies, whatever they're called.

I am so scared.

I make my literally stinking entrance and grin at him. /No paper./

"Where's my homework?" The Stupid One gets in closer and gags at the smell of my 'cologne'. "Phew! Jeez, you smell like........garbage?"

Bingo.

"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The Stupid One runs to save his precious works.

Chump.

I pull out the papers from where I hid them under the couch, and leave the room to chew them in peace.

Or maybe I'll just wait for the Stupid One to come back and start Round Two.

#END OF SIDUS POV#

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

A 20-year-old young man was walking down the street when he saw someone halfway down his garbage can.

"Hey Edward! What up, dude?"

"The dog lost my homework in the trash!" came Eduardo's muffled reply.

"?" The man looked at him quizzically. "I doubt Mrs. Fieldsburg will be convinced. Lots of luck though!"

Then he continued on his way, leaving Eduardo to feverishly dig for his assignment.

= * =

LENG TFC: Well peeps, that's another chapter up, with no thanks to Slick BlackWolf.

Slick BW: Sorry.

Sidus (mimicking Sailor moon): In the name of the moon, I will punish you!

LENG TFC: What for? Making Janine.....y'know, do that?

Sidus: Like, DUH!

Janine: But all I did was -

Sidus: I know, I know. Hug and squeeze and cuddle and CRUSH!

LENG TFC: At least I let you chew up Eddie's homework and make him dig in the trash.

Eddie: You're cruel......Both of you.....

LENG TFC: Here. Have a cookie to make it all better.

= * = * = * =