Chris sat on the porch of his new home. It was more like a cabin, but a very, very large cabin. It was all wood, and very rugged. It was perfect for him to live out his days. He had sold all his furniture in his old house, and had given away everything he couldn't sell.
He wanted a new start, wanted things that didn't remind him of her. He had bought all new stuff for his new home, things that she never would have liked. He knew that he had to move on from her, but he also knew that he couldn't.
His friends kept telling him that he should forget about her, that he should find someone else. He kept telling them that he didn't know how to move on, he didn't know how to live without her. Everyday it was like he was in a flux, a place of suspended time.
Most of the things he did were the opposite of the dreams that they had had. Living in New Mexico instead of Canada wasn't the only thing he did that was different. They had wanted to live in a nice neighborhood with lots of neighbors, and lots of kids around, and he had moved to a desolate part of the country, the nearest town a good fifteen miles away. He didn't have neighbors, just the land that he lived on.
He wanted to be away from people, sure he was being recluse, and it was lonely at times, but this was how he wanted to live out his days. He had taken to raising horses, and he had built a stable for them. He had always been crafty like that, and horses were his only constant companions. He didn't have many visitors as it was…ok, if he was honest, he hadn't had ANY visitors.
He sat back in the wooden chair on the porch, and just looked out at the vast expanse of his land. It really was pretty peaceful when he thought about it. It offered him the solitude that he needed so desperately. And it gave him the chance to think of her. And he thought of her often.
"Christopher, we need to talk."
Those were the words that haunted him. Granted, it had been a little over a year since she had left him, he was still haunted by that last day with her. Those words were the beginning of the end for them, and those words had changed his life completely.
If only he had been able to stop her, if only he had been able to get his thoughts together sooner, she might be with him. He had been ready to forgive all her offenses because he adored her too much not to, but she obviously thought that he wouldn't forgive her and had left.
"We should live in Canada," she said.
"Why Canada?"
"I don't know, because you're from there," she said shrugging.
"And we should move there just because I'm from Canada?" he asked laughing.
"Well, not just because of that," she said, tapping his shoulder, "It's nice country up there."
"I guess we can live up there eventually."
How his dreams had been shattered, everything had been taken from him in one fell swoop. He had to force himself to get out of the bed in the morning, force himself to move, because he didn't have her with him. He missed her more than words could say.
"Do you want kids Christopher?"
"Sure."
"Well, that was awfully nonchalant."
"Well, are we going to have one today?"
"No."
"Then I'm not going to get worked up."
They had wanted raise a family, and now that would never come true. There would never be any children in his future. Not unless she came back to him. He could just imagine his kids running around the backyard, he sighed, thinking that would never happen.
He got up from his chair, and stretched slightly. He walked over to his stable, intending to go for a horseback ride. He got onto his horse, Othello, and rode out into the fields, hoping to clear his mind for a little while.
He loved riding his horses, it gave him a sense of freedom, feeling the air whip through his hair, it was exhilarating. It was a comfort to him, this freedom, when he was down. He just kept riding, hoping to forget about his life, forget about his pain, forget about Jessica.
He stopped Othello, and once again, just looked out. He was actually glad that he had chosen to live here, he had really fallen in love with the land out here. In some ways, he was actually content with how his life was right now. But he still pined away for his one true love.
He rode back to the stable, and brushed out Othello before heading back to the house. He walked around to the front of the house, and saw an unfamiliar car parked outside. He looked to his front porch and saw someone standing there. He looked closer, and saw it was a woman.
"Excuse me, can I help you?" he called out.
She turned around, and looked at him.
