WARNING:
SPOILERS FOR OOTP.
A/N: Hey, guys. Well, as is the majority of the Harry Potter Fan
community, I was extremely upset with the death of Sirius. My favorite
characters are Ron, Lupin, Weasley twins, and Sirius. I was praying through the
whole book that none of the five would die. However, I did not get my wish. If
you have some annoyances about the most recent novel, please visit my website at
and find my ranting page...Please
respond and tell me how it made you feel.
Summary: Remus spends time reflecting on his friendship with Sirius,
and discovers that Sirius has left something very important behind that Remus
must deliver to Harry...
Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns the characters (and kills them! Oh,
sorry, couldn't contain myself...) and Lifehouse owns the song "Somewhere In
Between."
Claimer: I felt compelled to write this out of my own grief. Therefore
I own the plot. I think it turned out rather well. Please R/R.
*~*...~*~...*~*...~*~...*~*
"What Is Real, Or Just
A Dream"
Songfic To: "Somewhere In Between" By Lifehouse
Written by:
Marcie
*~*...~*~...*~*...~*~...*~*
The atmosphere in Hogsmeade that July afternoon was
unlike most had been prior to it. Through the summer holidays, beautiful weather
was most often present. Now, however, the streets were being pummeled with
raindrops and serenaded with the gentle rumbles of thunder in the distance.
People were running to and fro, holding copies of
The Daily Prophet over
their heads to deflect the rain, attempting to find shelter away from the
wetness.
Three Broomsticks was particularly crowded that night, several witches
and wizards taking refuge in the dry building and sipping on some Butterbeer to
warm themselves up in preparation for the journey back outdoors into the messy
weather. There was a couple huddled together in one of the booths nearby,
warming one another up and smiling lovingly. Madam Rosmerta was so preoccupied
with customers that she hardly had a moment's rest to interact with them.
Remus Lupin was one of the occupants of the bar that night, sipping on
his own Butterbeer and reading through the headlines of his own sopping copy of
The Daily Prophet, perusing its articles in hopes to find one dedicated
to his closest friend's death. There was another article starring Harry, a
special on Lockhart's improving condition in St. Mungos, a couple of Death Eater
sightings, but nothing that mourned the loss of Sirius Black.
Lupin lowered his magazine back onto the table in defeat, running
shaking fingers through his hair. Remus had always appeared much older than he
truly was, stresses of his life apparent through his features. His face harbored
premature wrinkles and his hair sprouted gray strands daily, mingling with his
natural color of light brown. There had been enough occurrences in his life for
him to appear a higher age. Not only did he suffer under a full moon each month,
(having just undergone a transformation the previous day), though sometimes with
Snape's helpful Wolfsbane potion, but also he had already been forced to cope
with the loss of one of his best friends already, before this happening.
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
I can't be losing sleep over this
No, I
can't
And now I cannot stop pacing
Give me a few hours
I'll have all
this sorted out
If my mind would just stop racing
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
Now he had been forced to endure the look on Sirius's face as he
fell over, dead. The face that haunted his dreams almost every night. Harry's
expression as Remus, Arthur, Tonk, and Mad-Eye escorted Harry to his aunt and
uncle at the end of term. Harry was suffering the same loss that Lupin was. The
loss of a best friend; a mentor; a reason for being alive. Sirius had been
Harry's only chance at a real family, at a solid reminder of his father. Not
only that, but Sirius had shown Harry love that he could never fathom. Not even
from the Weasleys. While Molly and Arthur did indeed dote on him as an extended
son, it was not the same as being in the presence of his godfather. A godfather
who would have done
anything to protect him. Who had escaped from Azkaban
Prison to keep watch over him once he had learned of Peter's Animagus form
serving as the Weasley pet, Scabbers. Who had lingered in nearby cave dwellings
with a Hippogriff, living off rats alone, to keep a close eye on Harry's well
being. Under circumstances like that, it just wasn't as same as the Weasley's
care.
And
that was what Remus called dedication and selfless,
unconditional love. It was the way James would have loved. It was the way Sirius
had always wanted to be. And now, with that in mind, the lines tracing the tough
skin of Remus Lupin's face had begun to sink deeper as his face aged even
further with the new distress.
Remus lowered his Butterbeer, suddenly no longer feeling thirst.
Through his mental protests, his mind wandered back to the scene…
~*~
Remus was feeling drained, but maintained strength sufficient to
finish the fight. The atmosphere was intense and the dueling equally so. It was
not as though he shouldn't have expected the battle. He had been warned the
moment he joined The Order. Though still, he had never been one keen on risking
his or another's life for a test of power.
He managed to stun Crabbe, and in the nick of time, as well. Harry and
a leg-twitching, nose-bleeding Neville Longbottom had been cornered by Malfoy.
Lupin fled to them, wand out, arm pumping along with him as he ran. He had to
get close enough so as not to suffer interference with his curse. He aimed his
wand towards Malfoy's backside. However, the spell in mind was not necessary,
for Harry had taken the initiative.
"Impedimenta
!" the fifth-year cried, his voice sounding
strangely hoarse and strained. Malfoy smashed down into the dais, nearby to
Sirius and Bellatrix. As Lupin passed, Sirius gave him a wink and launched yet
another hex in his cousin's direction. Malfoy was regaining his strength, the
sneer practically burning through his Death Eater's mask. He was aiming back at
the boys. Lupin took the opportunity and leapt in his path, disallowing any harm
to his former students. Malfoy looked enraged.
"Harry, round up the others and GO!" Lupin shouted over his shoulder.
Once Malfoy had risen to his feet, he aimed the death curse in Remus's
direction. However, the werewolf was far too fast for him as he leapt out of the
way and aimed a Disarming spell at the dark wizard.
Their dueling continued on for a few moments, Lupin continually
glancing over his shoulder to be sure Harry was out of harms way. Nonsense,
James's son was far too like his father when it came to bravery. It swelled in
their hearts and nothing cut them down.
Once Dumbledore made his dramatic appearance, the Order felt a brush of
relief, knowing that the situation was now being placed in the appropriate
hands. Malfoy fled in terror, scrambling away to find his foul master. Remus
nearly pocketed his wand but thought better of it, keeping it out and himself on
guard.
Bellatrix and Sirius were still going at it. Bellatrix had a malicious
glint in her eyes, growing impatient with Sirius's lack of angry responses in
their duel. He had merely been smiling at her, that same grin that had always
been present on his face when met with a challenge. Lupin distinctly remembered
that look having been glued into place the first time his took his Animagus form
of Padfoot…
Sirius ducked the beam of light surging out of the point of Bellatrix's
wand, chuckling triumphantly under his breath. "Come on, you can do better than
that!" His voice reverberated on the walls, the words returning to Lupin's ears
more than twice.
And then, she did. She aimed at him once more, straight into the chest.
Sirius's eyes went wide with shock, but his triumphant smile still reigned
across his lips as he began to fall…Falling…never stopping…Bellatrix shrieking
in satisfaction…
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
I cannot stand still
I can't be this
unsturdy
This cannot be happening
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
It all flashed before his eyes. Sirius transforming into a
dog…Sirius and James setting off fireworks underneath Snape's desk in
Transfiguration…The look on his face when he heard of James's and Lily's
deaths…Remus's unspeakable joy as he heard Black's tale only two years ago,
learning of his innocence and Peter's betrayal. How much more relieving it was
to know that his best friend of the lot had not been the traitor at all, and
that it had been the one he always had misgivings about.
Sirius Zeffolon Black, the unstoppable…Finally being stopped…
Remus stared on in sorrow, hearing Harry's cries of remorse. The
werewolf, upon instinct, would have joined in with his wails in an instant,
however, maintained his composure, blinking back the tears that were surfacing
in his eyes. Not in front of Harry. He had to stay strong for Harry. For
Sirius…
Lupin took Sirius's own duties upon him, knowing that it would be his
best friend's will. He lunged forward and took hold of a sweating, disheveled
Harry, holding him tight around the chest. He debated for a moment whether to
make use of his wand in the situation, but decided against it. He did not want
to impose any sort of pain or authority over Harry. Harry…
"There's nothing you can do, Harry—" Lupin began, the stern strength in
his voice well feigned. He felt it breaking, but knew that it was undetectable
to any other ears.
"We can still reach him—" Harry protested fervently, trying to wriggle
from Remus's hold. Lupin closed his eyes briefly, again trying to suppress his
tears and remain determined for Harry.
"There's nothing you can do, Harry…nothing…He's gone."
"He hasn't gone!" Harry protested, still struggling to free himself
from Lupin's hold. "SIRIUS! SIRIUS!"
Lupin found Harry's cries of woe to be the breaking of his barrier. He
took another deep breath. "He can't come back, Harry," he began softly, hearing
now that his voice was breaking significantly. "He can't come back, because he's
d—" "HE—IS—NOT—DEAD!" Harry screamed defiantly. "SIRIUS!"
Lupin choked back his own sobs and began to drag Harry away from the
scene, away from his godfather's corpse, away from the memory…Though Lupin knew,
as well as Harry, that the scene would be lodged in their minds forever and
would not perish for as long as they both lived.
~*~
Lupin closed his eyes to dam the tears that he had shed often since
Sirius's death. Not only was it the last member of the Marauders for him to lose
(excluding Peter, the foul traitor), but he felt as though it was his fault.
When Remus had signed onto the project for The Order Of The Phoenix, Sirius had
whole-heartedly agreed. They had argued about it very briefly, Lupin warning
Sirius of the dangers they would be facing, especially Sirius, who was already
on the run from the Ministry and Dementors alike. However, Sirius had won the
argument, as he always had. If only Lupin could have persuaded him otherwise…
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
This is over my head
But underneath my
feet
'Cause by tomorrow morning
I'll have this thing
beat
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
"Ah, my dear friend, Remus," cooed Madam Rosmerta, relinquishing her
tray onto the table-top and taking a seat opposite from her old friend, finally
with room for a break now that the weather was clearing up. Immediately she
noted the distress in Remus's eyes and tilted her head at him. "Remus, my dear,
what's the matter?"
'Oh, nothing,' Remus thought bitterly, imagining the scenario that
would take place if he decided to bluntly explain. 'Well, you remember that
bloke, Sirius Black, my best friend, who used to come in here with James and hit
on you? Ah, yes, right you are, he was arrested nearly fifteen years ago, yes!
Well, turns out he's innocent. Yes, hold your gasps until the end, please…Yes
well he died after we failed at a top secret mission. Is it making sense yet?'
That would be cheery, indeed…
"Are you sure? Would you like another Butterbeer? On the house, love,"
Madam Rosmerta offered, gesturing to the bottle he had nearly completed. With a
lack of any sort of appetite, Remus gently pushed the beverage away from
himself, shaking his head gently.
"I'm quite finished, but thank you," he reassured, gathering his
Prophet and briefcase and rising to his feet. "I must be off, I'm afraid.
Do take care." With that, he lowered his lips in a short peck on Madam
Rosmerta's cheek, beginning to trudge away.
"Yes, bye now, come back soon," Madam Rosmerta called after him
hopefully. Remus did not turn around. The moment he was out of any possibly
Muggle eyes, he Disapparated into his home. The kitchen was completely unkempt
since he had begun his position in The Order, feeling the need to dedicate his
time and concentration to that rather than cleaning. He let loose an almighty
sigh; now was a better time than ever.
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
And everything will be back
To the way that
it was
I wish that
It was just that easy
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
He immediately made a beeline towards the unruly stack of parchment
on his counter, levitating it over to the table and sitting down beside it,
reciting the sorting spell. One pile began to form, holding business letters and
such. Another was for Order business, which he sheepishly realized he should not
have had lying about. Another was a pile of letters from friends. One in
particular caught his eye, however, just as it was sailing into its
corresponding area. He caught it before it could reach the pile and skimmed over
it with bated breath.
Dear Remus-
How's it going, mate? Not badly on this end. For a Hippogriff, Buckbeak
snores amazingly precisely like James!
I regret to inform you that this is about the gist of my humor in this
particular letter. If you're reading this, it means I've gone. Don't be alarmed,
I've enchanted the parchment to appear in your house. So upon the event of my
death, it will have materialized wherever you reside. That way it will be sure
to reach you, and guaranteed not to fall into the wrong hands. Gloomy to think
about, I reckon. But think of it like this: I'm with James and Lily, finally
catching up on old times! The only thing that would make it more perfect was if
our third Marauder was here with us, doing the same. I need you to do me an
extraordinary favor, Moony. You see, I've just discovered my Godson, well taken
care of (excluding those moronic Dursleys) and smart as ever. Spitting image of
James, really. I would love to provide Harry with a home but I'm not sure it
will ever be possible. I continually reassure him that my name will be cleared,
but Fudge has it in for me, as you well know. I just need you to do me this
favor…
I need you to take special care of Harry. You don't need to adopt him
or anything (though I'm sure he'd be honored and grateful to escape the foul
Dursley house), but just keep a watch on him, to make sure all goes well
wherever he is.
I've also included a package. This is very important, Remus. I need you
to give this to Harry on his sixteenth birthday if I am not here any longer. If
this parchment malfunctioned and appeared here out by accident, and if I am
indeed still alive, then I'll just be nicking the package back from you and
doing it myself, of course. But I've studied this enchantment closely and if
you're reading this at this moment…I'm sure there was no mistake.
The package should have appeared somewhere in that bloody wretched
kitchen of yours. Along with it is a letter. Be sure to get this to Harry on his
sixteenth. It's extremely important. Read it if you must, it does me no
injustice if I'm dead. Yes, yes, I see your grim expression now, clicking your
tongue and muttering to the parchment telling me not to make jokes. But I reckon
that's who I am, Moony. And I always will be. Even if I'm gone.
You take care, now. Be sure to keep taking Snape's Wolfsbane potion
(though check it and make sure the git hasn't poisoned it before-hand) and keep
a close watch on the Ministry. One day, give Fudge a swift kick in the arse for
me, would you?
Don't lose faith, Moony. You and James were the best mates I ever had.
I had to see one die painfully. I won't be keen on watching it happen again,
even from where I am.
Best Wishes,
Sirius Zeffolon Black
Padfoot
One of Four
Creators Of Marauder's Map
Champion Joker
Favorite (Denied) Student Of
McGonagall
Remus read the letter through a fair few times before rising from his
seat in pursuit of Harry's gift. At last he discovered it sitting beneath the
kitchen table. There it was, a fair-sized (Remus wondered how on earth he missed
it before) package addressed to Harry, with a parchment likewise tucked into the
twine the kept the package wrapped.
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
'Cause I'm waiting for tonight
Then
waiting for tomorrow
And I'm somewhere in between
What is real and just a
dream
What is real and just a dream
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
Lupin knew that he should probably respect Harry's privacy, if
not Sirius's, but allowed his curiosity to get the better of him. He did, after
all, have permission from his friend. He opened the parchment and read it
silently to himself, discovering that his letter, too, had been written some
time after joining The Order.
Dearest Harry-
If you're reading this, something has happened to me. By the time you
read it, of course, I'm sure that you've been alerted of my death. With my
involvement in the you-know-what, I'm sure it does not come as much of a
shock.
I've enclosed a package for you for your sixteenth birthday. Happy
Birthday, Harry. It is a gift I hope you find most rewarding and helpful. Maybe
even get into some mischief like myself and my friends! You deserve this, mate,
and it's always been on my mind to someday give it to you. I recovered all these
things from your parents' house the night of their attack. I'm sorry I didn't
get it all, but a lot of stuff had been burned too badly to salvage.
I have a confession to make, though I'm sure Dumbledore has informed
you of the situation already. The Dark Lord has plans, Harry. He has it in for
you. And it's not just because of your mum and dad. It's because a true-life
prophecy was made. It stated that one day in the end of July in 1980, a wizard
would rise that would be the equal of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. And in which
case, the boy would threaten His powers and chance of domination. For in the
end, one must kill the other, for both cannot go on to live simultaneously.
I'm sorry we didn't get the chance, Harry. I'm sorry that we never got
that chance. Sorry that we never had the opportunity to purchase one of those
beautiful refurbished white houses with the little picket fence surrounding a
perfectly cut yard. I would have loved to adopt you, Harry. In fact, it's the
one thing I regret most about not accomplishing in my life. It was not only
James's will, it was mine, too. I held you when you were only an hour old,
Harry…I looked deeply into your undeveloped eyes and made the promise that I
would never let anything happen to you in my role of your godfather. I made the
vow that you were first and foremost, above everything else. The moment we
locked eyes, Harry, I felt as though you weren't just my godson—you were
my son. Not in a possessive "I'm-going-to-have-to-kill-James-to-kidnap-you" sort
of way—but just in that deep feeling of belonging sort of way. And we never got
the chance to make it last…I wish I could make it up to you.
Confide in Moony. He's an excellent friend, as you have come to realize
over the past few years, I'm sure. He knows you almost as well as I do, though
you may not be aware. He kept tabs on you too, Harry. Remember that he and I
used to baby-sit you while your mum and dad were away. He blew up your high
chair once by accident. You just giggled and mimicked him for the next three
hours, waving your invisible wand in the air and making ridiculously accurate
explosion noises. Remus has never lived it down with me, nor has he quite lost
the blush he harbored that night. Ruddy lousy baby-sitter, he was. Well, we both
were. But we had so many good times.
I'm sorry, Harry, I am so sorry. I want to be all those things for you
but there is no time. There was never any time for us with this war still
happening all around us. If I could make the war disappear and hurry home to
adopt you I would. I would do it in a heartbeat. I would give up anything to be
your father. And I only wish I could be.
Watch out for Remus for me, you hear? Both of you need to look out for
each other while I'm away. Count on each other—it will prove to be a bond you
could not have imagined.
I'll tell your mum and dad you said hello.
Love,
Sirius Zeffolon Black
Padfoot
Your
Godfather
Your mentor
Your friend
Remus hurriedly said the spell to reseal the parchment, ignoring the
burning sensation of the tears rolling down his cheeks. Sirius's letter to Harry
was written perfectly. Remus did not doubt that it had taken him a fairly long
time, seeing as he was not the most seriously spoken wizard who ever lived.
Lupin glanced at the calendar, shuddering slightly at the sight of the
full-moon marker on the previous day, July 30th. Today, in fact, was Harry's
birthday. It had slipped his mind entirely.
Quickly he gathered Sirius's things, sprinting outside towards his
broomstick. After all, he could not Apparate into the Dursley's living room, nor
did he have sufficient time to connect them to the Floo network, nor did he much
want to interact with Harry's family at all. So instead he opted for broom
travel, which would not take long at all. He mounted and kicked off with his
Cleansweep, heading towards Little Whinging, the package magicked securely onto
the broom.
All the while, soaring through the clouds and looking down at the
shrunken houses, Remus thought of Sirius's letter and wondered what could
possibly be enclosed in the gift he had arranged for Harry. He had said that he
had recovered some things from James and Lily's home, but could not, for the
life of him, think of what he may be referring to.
Only a short while later, Remus began to fly down into the Dursley's
backyard, observing as down the street Dudley and a group of his friends
tormented a student from primary school. He sighed in sympathy, choosing not to
interfere, and allowed himself to hover outside Harry's bedroom window. He saw
for a moment before Harry recognized his presence that the boy was deeply
involved in his book,
Quidditch Through The Ages. Remus recognized the
look of distress on his face, the mask of anger, the—the premature wrinkles. He
had, in fact, endured a heart-breaking loss and would never be the same.
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
Would you catch me if I fall
Out of what
I fell in?
Don't be surprised if I collapse
Down at your feet again
I
don't want to run away from this
I know that I just don't need
this
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
At last, he took the opportunity, and knocked gently on the glass. Harry
looked up uncaringly towards the window, acknowledging in his eyes that it was
Lupin, one of the only people from the Wizarding World that he'd be willing to
see at this moment. He hurried over to the window and pulled it open, allowing
Remus to fly in.
The older man touched onto the carpet, taking his broom tightly into a
hold in his fist, the package dangling from the wooden handle. He smiled softly
at Harry in an effort to comfort the boy about the visit. "Hiya, Harry," he
began.
Harry simply nodded. Through his cold attitude, however, Remus could
see the relief in his eyes. "Here for another inspection?" Harry asked in a
strange monotone, his eyes slowly averting towards the open window as if
expecting Hedwig to arrive home at any given moment.
Remus shook his head. Yes, he, Arthur, Tonks, Mad-Eye, and the lot had
been dropping in one at a time, nearly once a week, to check up on Harry and be
sure that the Muggles were treating him well.
"I've come to talk to you. May I have a seat?" he asked, gesturing to
the disheveled bed. Harry nodded mutely, hurrying over to push some books and
such out of the way to make room for his older friend. Remus nodded politely in
gratitude, sitting on the edge of the mattress. "Thank you."
Harry was looking at him oddly, as though wondering to what occasion he
owed Remus's visit. However, a small light, hardly visible inside his pupil,
seemed to shine gratefully. A good-natured visit for no reason was the very
thing that could cheer him up, Remus hoped.
"Happy Sixteenth, Harry," Remus allowed with a grin. Harry lowered his
brow slightly, glancing behind him at the calendar, as if not recalling his own
holiday of birth himself.
"Don't tell me you've forgotten," Remus chided playfully, whispering a
spell beneath his breath. The cake he had designed in his mind on the way to the
Dursleys now appeared in front of Harry, white and blue icing and all. Harry
looked up at Remus after studying the cake carefully.
"What flavor is it?" he asked curiously.
"Chocolote. I know it's your favorite."
Harry nodded silently, then looked back up at his friend, a very slight
smile on his face. "Thank you for remembering."
"Not a problem, not a problem," Remus reassured, adjusting the hold on
his broom. The swinging of the package painfully into the backside of his head
reminded him of Sirius's gift. It was as though Padfoot had delivered him the
blow himself, urging him on. Remus merely smiled at the thought and extended the
end of his broom towards Harry, offering him to remove the package himself.
Harry's eyes lit up in curiosity as he reached out for it, detaching it
from Lupin's broom. "What is it?" he asked.
"Couldn't tell you, to be honest," Remus admitted, gesturing to the
parchment that came with the gift. "But I'm not the only one who remembered your
birthday."
"Who's it fr—" Harry began, then recognized the handwriting. He looked
up at Lupin in question, as if wondering how the gift came into Remus's
possession after the recent events.
"It appeared in my house the moment after…You know," Remus explained
carefully, pulling his own letter from Sirius out of his pocket. "I've got one
too." Harry set the letter aside and, as a typical teenager, began to rip open
the gift first. Remus grinned as, at last, he observed the contents. A photo
album of all four Marauders, including Lily. There were pictures in there from
Hogwarts, from their wedding, and even—Remus nearly lost his nerve—a photograph
of him blowing up Harry's high chair. And it replayed again…and again…and
again…Sirius guffawing in the background, Baby Harry giggling repeatedly.
Harry looked up at Remus, a ghost of a smirk on his face. "What's this,
Professor Lupin?" he asked slyly. Remus rolled his eyes, distinctly seeing hints
of James's own sneaky remarks, and gestured that he continue.
Harry did so, digging further into the package that had been presented
to him. He pulled out a magical wedding certificate with his parents' wedding
rings attached (Remus wondered how Sirius had gotten a hold of the Potter's
personal effects); followed by Harry's birth certificate; a certificate of
approval from the Ministry Of Magic for destroying the wands of Lily and James
Potter following their death, mostly for security reasons; stuffed animals that
danced around upon command that Harry had played with as a child, Remus
recognized; dried roses that had been given to Lily from James that very day as
he came home from work; a book titled,
So You Want To Be An Animagus!,
and, to Remus's disbelief, a folder overflowing with parchment. Remus recognized
not only the folder itself but also the emblem they had created across the
front. It was a small square in which was written
MARAUDERS in bold black
print. In each corner of the square followed a paw print, a full moon, antlers,
and a tail. Symbols of each nickname and animal form.
"What on earth?…" Harry began delightedly, opening the folder. Remus
grinned, knowing what would be uncovered. Inside was jammed full of parchments
regarding their transformations. Notes that they had scribbled back and forth.
Remus even took the initiative to reach out and take one to look over himself.
He recognized a note that had been written in the middle of Transfiguration
between Sirius and himself, starting with Moony's own worried scrawl.
[Moony] - I think McGonagall suspects something…Did you see
the way she looked at us when she began discussing Animagi?
[Padfoot] - Don't be ridiculous, Moony. You're imagining things.
Besides, if all else fails, we can use a memory charm on her!
Remus grinned to himself and handed it back to Harry. Inside the folder
were more torn bits of parchment and pages carbon copied from books. Harry
looked stunned and amazed all at once. He looked up at Lupin, a new range of
emotions on his face, his eyes glossing over with the beginnings of tears he had
not yet cried. "Thank you," he whispered.
"Don't thank me, thank Sirius," Lupin said, half-heartedly pointing a
finger towards the ceiling. "Go on, read the letter."
"Do you know what it says?" Harry questioned deviously, eyes twinkling
with more vigor as he eyed Remus.
"I do, indeed. Go on, read it."
He did so, murmuring the words out loud though Lupin had already read
them once. Even the second time around, Remus felt his eyes tearing over and
closed his lids to prevent the salty water from grazing his facial features once
more. Once Harry had finished the letter he harbored tears of his own, looking
up at Remus for assistance. The older wizard took it upon himself, laying a hand
gently on Harry's arm and gazing into his eyes.
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
'Cause I cannot stand still
I can't be
this unsturdy
This cannot be happening
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
"Sirius died for a good cause, Harry," he voiced strongly. "He
died doing something he loved: helping you. He could not have wished for a
better way to die. And I know that you're hurting. I've been too, you know…I
just haven't confessed it to anybody. And though the ruddy
Daily Prophet
has not even bothered to acknowledge his noble death,
we still know. And
as long as we've got each other…I reckon we'll be all right." He offered his
younger friend a feeble smile in conclusion. Harry smiled gently back.
"He's wrong, you know."
Lupin's smile faltered only briefly. "About what, lad?"
"He says he's sorry he never got the chance to be my father," Harry
recalled, stroking the letter with some newfound complacency. He then looked up
into Remus's eyes, a profound twinkle residing in its depths. "I wish he only
knew that he gave all of that to me and more. He was more than a father to me…He
was my
best friend."
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
'Cause I'm waiting for tonight
Then
waiting for tomorrow
And I'm somewhere in between
Of what is real
And
just a dream
~*~…*~*…~*~…*~*…~*~
END
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review!