Disclaimer: We don't own Final Fantasy IX!  Squaresoft does…

A/N: Just to let you guys know, (in case you don't figure it out while reading it), this is a flashback.  Actually, not really a flashback because Zidane isn't remembering, it's more like my view of what happened before the game takes place.  You may not think it has anything to do with the story for the time being, but it will all come together sooner or later!

Sakura-chan: A lot of people have been asking who is going to confront him about it.  And I'll give you the answer right now.  No one.  ^_^ It's hard to explain, but think about it, would you confront someone over something that you cannot help?  Or do not know how to help with? 

Kuja335: I made another one cry?!  I'm so happy!  ^_^ You people have no idea!  I'm going to cry ::does the Ms. America wave:: Thank you!  Thank you.  ::runs off to a corner to cry::

Kingpin: We've missed your reviews!  Glad that you didn't forget about us!  And since DOOM HAS COMMANDED ME, here's the chapter.  (Dragon Knight Fratly: And because I still have no intention of being thrown into a bottomless pit…^_^)

All readers: Just to let you know…from here on out it's going to get damn depressing.  Just a warning…this is going to turn into a major DEATHFIC.  ^_^ Okay? But you have to trust me…it should have a somewhat happy ending.  (If all works out right.)

A Voice from the Past

Silently, and a little worried, Kuja walked down the spooky structure of Pandemonium.  Garland had called on him, and the fourteen-year-old genome wondered what he could possibly want.  Last time he was called to Garland's quarters, he was beaten for trying to escape.

If he hadn't come back, Garland would have never known, but he did.  He came back for his five-year-old brother, Zidane.  The last thing he wanted was for him to be left alone with that crazed old man.  As soon as he stepped off of the ship, he was seized by several of the Genomes and dragged unwillingly, straight to Garland.

The abuse went on for days, both mental and physical.  He was shut in a confined room, barely fed, and the only person who could come in was Garland himself.  It was when Garland came in that Kuja knew a beating was coming.

Still, bravely, the teenager continued down the hall with his head held high.  Finally arriving at his destination, he swung open the doors.

"You called?" he asked coolly, trying to remain civil with the man he hated so much.

"Yes, I did," Garland said turning around the face him.  With his hand, he motioned for Kuja to have a seat.  Arms crossed and eyes fixed coldly he remained standing.  Garland only shrugged and seated himself.

"You must be wondering why I called you here."

Kuja scoffed, but said nothing.  Looking more than a little agitated, Garland continued.

"I need you to do something for me," Oh yeah?  What did you ever do for me?  "You are to take Zidane to Gaia and disrupt the cycle of souls," What if I don't want to?  "You both have your purposes, now go fulfill them."

"P-Purpose?" Kuja stuttered, "What purpose?" 

"What does it matter to an Angel of Death?  What could you possibly accomplish even if I did tell you now?  I'll tell you when the time comes," he spat, "Now, get out!"

Not wanting to be the victim of Garland's rage again, Kuja got out of the room as fast as he could.  Just as he left, Zidane came walked up the same corridor.

"Whatcha doin'?" he asked around the thumb he was sucking on.

Pretending to smile, Kuja said, "We're going on a trip."  The small blond boy jumped with excitement.

He deserves better than this kind of life!  I'll make sure he lives a better one then I had, Kuja thought as he watched his brother.  "But we have to leave now," he explained grabbing Zidane by the arm and leading him away from Garland's quarters.

"Where are we going?" Kuja didn't answer him.  In his head he was trying to piece together a plan to get them both off of Terra safely and without being spotted.  Then it came to him.

The Invincible, Garland's airship, was docked near Bran Bal.  There wasn't a single airship faster of more maneuverable than it.

"Come on!" Kuja picked Zidane up and ran as fast as he could into the small town.  He wasn't worried about the Genomes seeing him, they were mindless and wouldn't do anything unless Garland ordered them to.  Even as the silver haired boy ran through the streets, none of them did so much as look at him.

"Kuja!!"  Zidane complained.  The position he was held in wasn't exactly comfortable.

"Almost…there," he panted.  Kuja was quickly becoming tired, but finally he stopped abruptly in front of a gargantuan airship.  Carefully, he put Zidane down.

As soon as Zidane's feet touched the ground, he started massaging his sore ribs.  Kuja's hands were on his knees and he was bent forward, trying to catch his breath.

"Wow…" Zidane stared at the ship and placed his thumb back in his mouth.  As Zidane stood there awestruck, Kuja began circling the ship looking for a way to get in.

"Kuja, what's that?" Zidane asked pointing to a red sphere that almost resembled an eye on the ship's belly.

"Come here," Kuja motioned Zidane to him.  Zidane did as he was told.  When the toddler reached him, Kuja bent down and picked him up again.  This time, he walked directly under the red sphere.

Holding tightly onto his brother, Zidane buried his head into Kuja's shoulder as a blue light surrounded them both.  To Kuja it felt like he was being sucked into a small space, but just as quickly as it had started, it was over, and the two found themselves standing inside the airship.

"I don't ever want to do that again!  Never ever!" Zidane yelled jumping out of Kuja's arms.

"Sorry Zid," he laughed.  We're almost out of here forever!  Clearly in a better mood, Kuja followed Zidane into the cockpit.  Zidane sat down indian-style in front of the frontal window.

"It isn't going," he announced turning his head to look at Kuja.

"I know it isn't going."

"How are we going to get anywhere if we aren't moving?"

Rolling his eyes, Kuja turned for the door.  "I know what to do, stay right there and please don't' touch anything!"

Sticking his thumb back in his mouth, Zidane nodded and looked back out the window.  Kuja left for the circuit room.  I've stolen an airship before, he thought, remembering the time he tried to flee from Terra, I hope this one isn't any different. 

Hurriedly, he made his way through the unfamiliar ship.  Everything around him seemed to be blue, the same color as the glow of Terra.

No matter how long he looked, couldn't find the circuit room.  His search was interrupted when the ship shook violently.  Garland!  That was the first thing that come to his mind.

As fast as he could, he sprinted back to the cockpit.  What he saw utterly shocked him.  No, it wasn't Garland, but Zidane.

The small boy had left from his seat on the ground and was now standing on a blue orb in the middle of the cockpit.

"Hi Kuja!" he exclaimed happily, "I made the ship move!"

"You sure did!" Kuja gave a sigh of relief.  Zidane had found the control panel and was messing around with random buttons.  "Here, I bet I can figure it out," he said stepping forward.

Zidane stepped off of the orb and Kuja stepped on.  Immediately he felt it respond.  "If it's anything like the other ships," Kuja mumbled to himself, "Then this should work."  Move forward.

Much to Kuja's liking, the ship obeyed.  They were flying.  Slowly, the familiar surroundings of Terra were getting smaller and smaller.

"Wow!" Zidane ran back to the frontal window to take in the sights.

Kuja, do you know where we are going?  Zidane asked telepathically.

I'm not sure how to get off of Terra now that I think about it.

Off?!  Forever?

Yes, do you really want to stay here?

But, what about Garland?

Kuja flinched.  Angrily he replied out loud, "I don't care if I ever see him again!" Zidane turned completely around to look at him, tears forming in his little eyes.

"How can you hate him so much?" he cried, "He gave you life!"

If you could call it a life.  No, he won't understand. 

"C'mon Zid," Kuja sighed, "Wouldn't you rather live a real life?  Like a real kid?" 

Stubbornly, Zidane puffed out his lower lip and crossed his arms.  Finally, he looked up at his older brother and nodded.  Smiling, Kuja nodded back at him "I thought so." 

It was silent for a long time afterwards.  Kuja continued to control the ship and Zidane busied himself with looking out the window again.

"How did Garland do it?" Kuja asked himself, and then it came to him.  Break the seal, he ordered the ship.  In response the ship gave a sudden jolt, knocking Zidane down.  Kuja however, remained standing, but the movement was starting to make him nauseous.  He closed his eyes and waited for it to pass.

"Kuja!  Kuja!!" Zidane's cries echoed in his mind.  Seconds later, the Invincible stopped and he reopened his eyes.

Looking out the window he couldn't believe what he saw.  A beautiful assortment of colors, not just blue, made up the landscape.  Greens and browns, and everything in between.  

Auto-pilot!  Kuja demanded.  Before him a screen appeared displaying a map of the new planet.  After careful examination, Kuja chose a place that looked the most rural.  Madin Sari! 

He then stepped off of the orb and let the airship do the work for him.

"Zidane?  Are you alright?" he asked lending the boy a hand.

Holding onto his sore head, he nodded and stood up.  "Are we there yet?"

"Almost, we're going to land in Madin Sari," he explained, "We should be there any minute.

"Where are we gonna live?" Zidane asked grabbing Kuja by the hand.

"We'll figure something out," Kuja reassured.  Even if we end up living in this ship.  Any place is better than Terra. 

A beeping sound interrupted his thoughts.  Walking back to the blue orb, Kuja realized that they were hovering over the village.  Now, how do I land? 

On the control panel there weren't many buttons, but still there wasn't any telling what they could do.  None were labeled.

"Kuja, I'm hungry."

"I know!" he said impatiently.  "Okay," he blew out of his mouth, "Here goes nothing."

Glancing at all the different possibilities of buttons, he eventually chose the one that stood out the most.  A large red one.

Hold onto something!  He said to Zidane, then he held tightly onto the panel.  The ship started vibrating, Oh no this can't be good, then something shot out of the nose with such force it threw the entire craft back.  Then the ship started to shake again.

"You're attacking the village!  Stop before it's too late!" Zidane screamed.  Kuja desperately searched the control panel, trying every button on it.  Finally, the fire ceased, leaving Kuja standing there, wide eyed and breathing heavily.

"What's happening?" he asked his little brother.  Zidane looked out the window with a solemn face.

"A lot died," he announced, "Some are fleeing over the water." When Zidane turned back around his eyes welled up.  "It's all out fault isn't it?"

Murderer.  I'm a murderer.  Kuja thought as he hugged his legs to his chest.  It's all my fault.  I'm a murderer.

"Kuja don't cry," Zidane said walking to his side.

"I'm not crying," Kuja mumbled.  Zidane's eyes it seemed bore a hole into his head.  Finally, Kuja stood up.

"Well, there's no food onboard.  We better find somewhere to eat."

Zidane stared after his brother.  It was an accident.  Don't forget that.

Thanks Zid.  For awhile Kuja stood, just staring at the orb.  Did he dare get on?  He still didn't know how to land it.

Bravely, he got back on.  Auto-pilot, again the map was displayed, Lindblum. 

The trip there wasn't very long, but it was incredibly silent.  For the most part, the two would entertain themselves by looking at the breathtaking geography.

When they finally reached the Grand Castle, they were relieved to see it had an airship dock.  This meant all Kuja had to do was steer it correctly and not worry about landing it.

Using the warp pad, (much to Zidane's disliking) the two brothers ended up standing on the dock.

Carrying Zidane on his hip, Kuja made his way through the unfamiliar building and through the even stranger streets.

"Gysahl Pickles!  Come buy your fresh homemade Gysahl Pickles here!" a woman was crying out on the side of the road.  "You look like you're hungry, would you like a pickle?" she asked the two foreigners.  "They only cost five gil each!"

"What's gil?" Zidane asked poking his head over the booth.

"What's gil?!  What planet are you from?" the woman laughed.

"I'm sorry ma'am, but we don't have any money." Kuja explained.

The woman's eyes softened and she looked at them for a while.  "Well, you really do look hungry.  I'll tell you what, go ahead and have one.  It's on me," she winked.

Happily, Zidane reached a little hand up and she handed him a pickle.  Almost as soon as it touched his hand, the pickle was gone down his throat.  "Don't you want one?" she asked Kuja.

"No thanks," They smell horrible! 

"Are you sure?"

Kuja nodded and began to head down the street again, with Zidane following closely behind.

"Don't get too close, I can still smell that pickle on you," Kuja teased him.

"It was good!  You should've tried one!"

"No way, the smell alone would make me pass out," he laughed.

"But aren't you hungry?" Zidane asked, "You haven't eaten at all today!"'

"I'll eat, just not those."

Still laughing and joking around, they continued down the streets of Lindblum.  Just as they were rounding a corner, something happened they didn't expect.

A small group of Genomes walked toward them, their faces frozen, devoid of all emotion.  Kuja gasped and looked directly at Zidane, "Run!" he ordered, "Get out of here!  Hurry!"

With a confused look on his face, Zidane ran under one of the Genomes legs.  After getting a considerable distance away, he turned to see what was happening.  One of the genomes held Kuja in a headlock and the rest were surrounding him.

"Get away from me!" he yelled struggling to get away.  His silver hair was in his face and his eyes were wide with fear.  "Don't come any closer!"

Everyone on the streets had stopped doing whatever they were doing and turned to watch the drama.  The circle of Genomes got tighter around the teenage boy; soon you couldn't even see him.  A scream rang out then the group loosened.

One of the Genomes held an unconscious Kuja in a cradle and carried him out of eyesight.  Several curious glances followed them, but no one did anything about it.

"Kuja!" Zidane cried, "Don't leave me!" he got up and wandered down the street in the direction the Genomes went, tears streaming down his face.  This place was so much different, so much scarier than Terra.

People towered over him, didn't even notice him.  As the child wandered aimlessly around in the endless maze of citizens, a man who wasn't paying any attention tripped over him.  Colors swirled around in Zidane's head, and soon he knew no more.

*         *         *

Zidane let out a moan and shifted his weight.  "Hey boss!  I think he's coming around!" a boy, probably around ten yelled.

A big man came over to where Zidane lay, "You alright kid?  How's yer head?"

"Where am I?" he asked sitting up.

"Seems like he's lost his memory," the boy murmured.  Sadly, the man nodded in agreement.

"Can you remember anything?" the man asked.  The child didn't answer.

"Well, my name is Baku.  This is Marcus.  I guess yer livin' with us now.  At least until you get your memory back"

"Can you remember your name?" Marcus asked.

After thinking awhile, the blond boy looked up, "I think I was called Zidane."

Baku smiled, "Well Zidane, I'm glad yer finally awake."

~ ~

Okay.  That's all for this one.  I'm going to have a few chapters like this.  You know, just putting important past events in order in my perspective.  Kuja is too cool of a character to be completely evil.  He's just…not all there, if you know what I mean.  Well, at least my Kuja is that way.  You can believe what you want.  ^_^