Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh OR Monty Python and the Holy Grail…so please don't bother asking…

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The Salem Anzu Trials

By Artemis Wasabi

Honda: We've found a witch!!! *runs in with Anzu tied on a stake*

Anzu: This is SO unfriendly!

Jonouchi: That's because we're not your friends anymore.

Anzu: O__O!!!

All: *pass Ryou* A witch!! A witch!!

Ryou: *interested* How do you know she's a witch?

All: *look to one another* *turn to Ryou and shrug*

Anzu: I'm telling you!! I'm NOT a witch!

Ryou: All right, then…you're on!

All: On what?

*Scene changes to a live studio audience*

Bakura: On The Salem Witch Trials! And here's your host, Yami…er…um…just Yami.

Yami fangirls: *applauding, screaming, and fainting*

Yami: *jumps up from a trap door, does a little flip and lands on his feet* Hello, and welcome to…

All: THE SALEM WITCH TRIALS!!!

Yami: Now, for those of you who don't know the rules, here they are! Our unlucky witch in denial will be given these three tests in three different rounds.

            #1) Eye Witness

            #2) Scales and Logic

            #3) The Melting of Witches

Now for round one, Eye Witness. Here in the studio we have a friend of mine…

Voice from backstage: I'm NOT your friend!

Yami: Ok…not really a friend...acquaintance. Please welcome, Seto Kaiba!

Seto fangirls: *applauding, screaming, and fainting*

Seto: Hello, Yami. It's really NOT a pleasure to be here.

Yami: Nobody cares about your unhappiness when you're on…*signals the audience*

All: *does nothing*

Yami: *makes an even broader gesture*

All: *still don't get it*

Yami: SAY THE BLOODY LINE!!

All: Oh!!! Could you say the lead in again?

Yami: *exasperated* When you're on…

All: THE SALEM WITCH TRIALS!!!

Yami: *muttering* Finally… *turns to Seto* Alright Seto, You believe that this girl, Anzu Mazaki, is a witch, right?

Seto: *thinking about random Seto/Anzu fics written by various authors* Well…actually…

All: *death glare*

Seto: *quickly* Yes I do!

Anzu: Kaiba! You traitor!!

Yami: Good. Now how do know she is a witch?

Seto: *thinks* She…looks…like…one?

Anzu: I DO NOT!!

Seto: You do have a wart on your face.

Anzu: I DO NOT!!!

Yami: Well…looks aren't everything, Seto. Do you have any other reasons?

Seto: *ponders this for a very long time* She turned me into a newt!!

All: *GASP!!*

Anzu: WHAT!?!?!

Yami: *looking at Seto from head to toe* She…turned you into a newt?

Seto: I…got…better?

Yami: Works for me!! And now a very long a annoying commercial break!! We'll return after a word form our sponsers!!  

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Artemis: Ary-chan here!! How did like my story? Isn't it SO much better than Relick's stories?

Relick: WOAH!! Hold the phone!! You're not gonna steal my reviews!

Artemis: I can and I am!!

Relick: Fine! I challenge you to a duel!!

Artemis: You always say that when you don't get your way!! Your just too stubborn! Besides…you know I always beat you!

Relick: There's a first time for everything, little sister!

Artemis: Bring it on!! Oh! And on your way out, review please!!