GAINAX and Evangelion are not mine, and neither do I want them. Nope. Not at all.

First and foremost, I want to sincerely thank everyone who has taken an interest in the story. Much to my surprise, the comments directed at me were all positive and people were telling me that they liked the story. As everyone knows this goes a long way in motivating a writer to continue and I think I have been suitably manipulated into posting more chapters.

I have no intention of leaving Evangelion: All is Right With the World unfinished. I'm obsessive-compulsive about this sort of thing so one way or the other this will get finished. I must say, I am enjoying writing it… it's the perfect way for an eighteen-year old slacker to pass the time in the school holidays

This chapter is a little more introspective. This is mostly to try and slow down the romance a bit. I have a vague idea of what is going to happen, but I don't know how long it will take. It's just kind of hard figuring out what the rest of the world would be doing at a time like this and that is going to tie in with the story a little bit later.

Once again, thank you to everyone for reviewing and posting comments, and keep 'em coming. You can never have too much hate mail, I always say.

Take it easy,

RENEGADE

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ALL IS RIGHT WITH THE WORLD

03. At the End of Your Dream

After Second Impact, the Earth was tilted off its polar axis and abnormal patterns of weather became apparent. Now that Third Impact had destroyed their city, leaving nothing but grey rubble and the skeletal remains of buildings as far as the eye could see, there was very little shelter for the newly returned residents of Tokyo-3.

Shinji was somehow unsurprised when it started to rain heavily.

"Whaaat!?" screeched his companion. "What is this? As if the end of the world wasn't enough, we get a downpour dumped on us? This really sucks!"

"Maybe we should look for some shelter, Asuka," Shinji ventured as the angry redhead paced in circles, fuming and cursing at the grey sky. The blood rainbow was still slashed across the heavens as the drops began to fall.

Asuka Langley Sohryu spun around to face the boy. "Well, thank you very much for that, Shinji Ikari," she replied sarcastically. "Where would I be without you to help me puzzle out these difficult decisions?"

Shinji muttered inaudibly under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Well… can we go? There… were people around here before… maybe we should see if we can find them."

"Fine. Which way should we head, navigator?"

"I'm… not really certain."

"Oh, come on!"

The two of them made a run for it into the crumbled heart of the city as a booming crash of thunder rolled over them and the heavens opened.

*          *            *

They found, much to their relief, quite a large group of people. It was by accident, really; Shinji and Asuka had been dashing through the debris-strewn streets when a sudden flash of yellow caught Asuka's eye. It belonged to the shirt of a young woman who was standing in the doorway of an auto-repair shop. Skidding to a halt, the two ex-Eva pilots cautiously approached and were given a wary greeting which they hesitantly returned. After the two Children spent a moment of uncomfortable silence standing in the pouring rain, Asuka rather harshly asked the woman if she was going to invite them in. When the woman paused to consider the question, Asuka sighed and, pulling Shinji along behind her, barged past the woman and into the building.

It was lucky that this place was in as good a condition as it was. The auto-repair shop was squat and so much of the whirling devastation of the Third Impact explosion had passed over it. Its neighbouring buildings hadn't been so fortunate; this street, like the rest of the city, was now a quarry.

Storming into the large garage and dragging a feebly protesting Third Child along with her, Asuka stamped into the middle of the concrete floor and glared at the other 'residents'.

"Um… hello," a middle aged woman ventured cautiously as she bowed slightly, warily perceptive of Asuka's fiery temperament even after so short a time had passed.

Asuka was gazing disdainfully about her, hands on hips, making no move to speak, so Shinji, who hated uncomfortable situations like this, attempted to return the greeting. "Good… um… morning…"

Asuka butted in. "Yes. I'm Asuka Langley Sohryu of NERV. Second Child and pilot of Evangelion Unit-02, if that means anything to you."

The woman's eyes widened in surprise and the numerous other shadowy figures in the garage began whispering amongst themselves. Shinji fidgeted and avoided their stares. "You pilot those robots?" the woman gasped. "You were… involved in… what happened, then?"

"No, of course not," Asuka snorted. "I had nothing to do with that. That was the Third Child, here. Ikari."

"Oh, you were a pilot, too?" the woman asked hopefully as Shinji stammered out his name. "Can you tell us what's happened?"

"Don't you know?" Asuka said, dumbfounded. "Even after you went through it?"

"Er," the woman said, more subdued. "Well, nobody here… ah, fully understands what has happened. Well, we know what happened, but that isn't the same…" she struggled for words.

"It…" Shinji started, uncharacteristically interrupting. He felt his cheeks burn as all eyes turned to him and he stared at his feet. "It was called Instrumentality. It was started by an organization that controls NERV and the United Nations… um. SEELE."

"How do you know all of this?" a man demanded suspiciously. "We all know that we… became one. We know that we shared memories and knowledge, but we didn't know everything."

"Of course not!" Asuka said loudly. "If you want my opinion…" Nobody seemed willing to say otherwise. "…I think that we only shared memories with the people we were close to or were involved with. Instrumentality ended just as it was really beginning. If it had gone on longer, you probably would have ended up knowing everything."

Shinji looked at her in surprise. "How… do you…"

"Oh, stop it," Asuka snapped. "I'm not dumb, Ikari."

"I didn't…"

"I have a college degree."

"I know, Asuka! I was just wondering how you knew. I mean, it wasn't something you learned in Instrumentality, because I would have known it too. So that means you must have learned all that since then."

"Well…" Asuka turned away. "It didn't occur to me until recently, that's true." She smiled grimly at a recent memory. "Take a little analogy. The meaning of the AT Field."

Shinji nodded carefully, recognising her memory. "All right…"

"Right," Asuka butted in, not allowing Shinji to steal her moment of triumph. "When we synchronised – merged – with our Evas, both of us received memories and so on from…"

"The souls inside our own Evas," Shinji said quietly.

"But when you merged with Rei's Eva, you got nothing but a world of hurt."

"I wasn't close to that soul, so I got nothing."

"Yeah. It's the same here. I think."

Asuka suddenly became aware of a roomful of dumbfounded and confused stares. "Look, it doesn't matter," she snapped, cheeks flushing. "You all want it in layman's terms? Fine! One: SEELE merges all souls using the Evangelions, Third Impact and a doomsday weapon called the Lance of Longinus. Everyone gets a few memories from people close to them. Two: Shinji, inside Unit-01 – which was the 'medium' – refuses Instrumentality so it fails. Three: if a person can imagine themselves as a person, an individual, they get a choice – stay there or come here. All you people chose to come here."

The people in the garage began nodding slowly as realisation gradually wiggled through the fog. Asuka looked around smugly, hands on hips in satisfaction of her fine work. "Any questions?"

A hand went up in a corner. It was a very young man wearing a leather jacket. "Yes?" Asuka said testily, obviously miffed that she hadn't explained everything in one go.

"Did you really go to college?"

Shinji turned away as a small smile crept onto his features. This young man was walking down a dangerous road. If only he knew.

*          *            *

The Second and Third Children were seated in a dark corner of the garage. They had gratefully accepted some mediocre food that the others had scavenged from the rubble and Asuka had allowed Shinji to recount in greater detail the events that had led to rebirth. The people had taken it relatively well, she mused, then mentally snorted. Probably because they didn't even understand.

Shinji sighed. The other people respected their privacy now that they had received as many answers as he had been able to provide. He glanced over to Asuka. She seemed to be taking great pleasure in sending a dagger look across to the young man every now and then, causing him to flinch and look away.

He drew his legs up to his chest and huddled into them, trying to keep warm against the chill of the hissing rain outside. He leant his head back against the greasy, grey brick wall of the large garage and shut his eyes, listening to the droplets drumming on the roof.

The rain had always been a source of peace for him. It was such a gentle, soothing sound, one he could get lost in for hours. He loved looking out the window and seeing a grey curtain of rain, quiet pattering on the glass, washing away the colour of the world. So serene and peaceful. It was a strange thing, but every time it rained, Shinji felt as though everything was being washed away so that it could start again. The city was being given a clean slate, a fresh start, a new beginning.

The fate of destruction is also the joy of rebirth.

Shinji sighed heavily, calling up different words from a different visionary. He smiled wanly.

"Shinji? What is it?" Asuka was looking at him curiously. She was in much the same position as he was, knees against her chest to ward of the cold, though her plugsuit probably meant that she was warmer than Shinji. She cocked her head on one side as he lifted his from its position against the wall. "What are you smiling at?"

Shinji said nothing for a moment, still smiling, before he closed his eyes and leaned back once again. "I was thinking…"

After a few moments Asuka prompted him with a frown. "Well?"

"Anywhere can be paradise," he said serenely. "As long as you have the will to live. After all, you are alive… and so you will always have the chance to be happy." Shinji turned to look at Asuka, who was staring at him. "He was right," he murmured quietly. "Death creates nothing."

Asuka nodded slowly, despite not fully understanding everything Shinji was saying. "I'll definitely agree with that."

"I think… I'm beginning to understand my mother, Asuka. She always thought… our hearts are beating, so it is important that we choose to live. Not simply to exist."

They sat facing one another.

Finally, Asuka spoke, a little awkwardly. "Did… you pilot the Eva to learn about your mother?"

Shinji shook his head. "No… I never really suspected the truth about her and the Eva until recently. Just before… Kaworu. My father… once told me something. I don't know if it was some kind of lesson or advice, but I remember it. He said that he was satisfied with the memories in his heart. And… I agree. It's better to let the dead rest… when you have to. My mother is gone… but she'll always be with me because I will remember what she said."

Shinji's voice dropped even lower. "That was another thing he said. There are some things a man should never forget. I agree with that, too… but I think that… other things… you just have to let go. Or they will hold you forever."

"Have you tried, Shinji?" Asuka said coldly. Shinji looked up in surprise and was shocked to see anger in Asuka's eyes. "What if the dead don't let you rest, Third Child? What if there are some things you can't forget because they just hurt too much? What if you aren't satisfied with the memories in your heart, because they suck? What then, Shinji? It isn't easy to just let go."

Shinji looked away. He knew about Asuka's mother, now, thanks to Instrumentality. It was such a sad and terrible story. He knew that if it wasn't for Instrumentality, she never would have revealed it to him. "Asuka…"

She sighed, shut her eyes and took a deep breath. "Oh, I'm sorry, Shinji," she grumbled. Shinji didn't say anything, but Asuka had known him for long enough to understand that he had accepted the apology. "I… know that you know… about me. About my mother. I want you to know now that… I have let go."

"I'm sor-"

"Don't say it," Asuka snapped warningly, eyes narrowing. "If you say that, Shinji, this conversation is over. Let me say it for now, okay? Just this once, at least."

"I'm sor… oh. All right. Um…I just… I didn't mean… to hurt… um… you."

"I know, and you didn't," she sighed, leaning back herself. "It's all right. You know, I piloted Eva because deep down, I wanted praise – because if I didn't have praise then I felt as if I had no proof when I said I was the best. It was my mother's praise I was really after most of all… I wanted… I needed the praise of my dead Mama because I thought she didn't want me. I thought she didn't need me. She thought I was… a doll…"

"I… understand," Shinji said quietly.

Asuka let out a short laugh. "Do you, Shinji? Do you really?"

An image of Gendo Ikari materialised before Shinji's eyes.

I thought you didn't want me!

I called you because I have a use for you.

"I do understand, Asuka," he said honestly. She looked over and realised. Looking away again, she laughed dryly.

"Yeah," she said simply. And then, almost inaudibly under her breath, she mumbled, "Thanks."

"You're… strong, Asuka. You know that. I wish I was like you."

"I know. But there's only one Asuka Langley Sohryu!"

"Yeah," admitted Shinji, before bowing his head and muttering, "Thank God."

Asuka heard and laughed loudly. She turned and grinned evilly into Shinji's face, nudging him hard in the side. "I think that you would be more than happy to have a few more of me around, Ikari. More Asukas for you to kiss in their sleep."

Shinji blushed fiercely and turned away. "I… told you, I never…" he mumbled.

A faint smile crept over Asuka's features. "Pervert," she snickered good-naturedly.

"Yeah, well… it's not as if you haven't done anything like that to me!"

"That was to kill time, Third Child! Don't flatter yourself into thinking it was anything more!"

"Hmph." Shinji looked slightly crestfallen.

If there was one thing that got Asuka into a good mood, it was teasing Shinji. "Still, it wasn't bad, was it, Ikari?" she remarked offhandedly. "I'll bet you think of it a lot."

"Not as much as you'd think," muttered Shinji. In answer to Asuka's curious – and slightly disappointed – expression, he said, "You washed your mouth out straight afterwards, Asuka. It… didn't exactly… make me feel…"

"Oh." Now it was Asuka's turn to be embarrassed. "Well… I… didn't… mean it, Shinji. I was kind of… mad because I let you…" She glanced up with a half smile on her face. "It wasn't that bad."

Shinji looked slightly relieved. "Not for you, at least," he replied dryly, remembering the torture of holding his breath as long as Asuka had made him.

"And just what is that supposed to mean?!" Asuka stood up and towered over Shinji, hands on her hips. "Are you saying that I'm a bad kisser?" she demanded rather too loudly.

"Ssh! Asuka! Sit down!" Shinji turned as red as a tomato as people turned to look curiously. The young man in the leather jacket Asuka had been antagonizing earlier looked utterly stunned.

"Not until you say I'm a great kisser!" she yelled crossly.

"All right! All right! You are, Asuka! Okay?"

"Say it!"

"You are a good kisser, Asuka!"

"Just good?"

"Great! You're great, Asuka."

"Hmph. All right."

Shinji sighed heavily but froze as he realised the amount of eyes that were on him. Asuka, noticing the same thing, spun around and treated the room to one of her trademark glares. "Hey, get a picture, it lasts longer!"

Once the occupants of the garage had returned to whatever they were doing, Asuka sat back down.

"Perverts everywhere," she grumbled.

Shinji and Asuka sat in silence for a few minutes, shivering as a particularly icy gust of wind whipped through the ill-protected auto garage.

"You know…" Shinji said eventually, talking quietly as he hugged his knees to his chest. "I didn't know what to do, Asuka… when you were… in hospital."

"You didn't know what to do…?" Asuka repeated, glancing over. He was avoiding her gaze.

"I was all alone."

Asuka shifted awkwardly and considered what she was going to say. "I…"

"It's all right, Asuka. You don't have to say anything. I shouldn't have even brought it up, but… I felt like I had to say it."

In times like this, Asuka's automatic side took over. "Idiot," she snorted, more stiffly than she intended.

Shinji smiled faintly. "Yeah."

Asuka rolled her eyes. "You know, Shinji, I sometimes wish I could find out what's going on in your mind when I call you a name. Doesn't it get on your nerves? Or do you find some kind of weird pleasure in it?"

Shinji's cheeks turned red. "I… don't mind it, that's all."

Asuka shook her head. "You don't, do you." She grinned at him. "Weirdo."

Flushing even deeper, Shinji smiled faintly without meeting her eyes.

"I think I'm starting to understand my mother as well."

"Huh?" Shinji looked over.

"I saw her, you know," Asuka told him quietly.

"You saw…"

"In Instrumentality. I saw her."

*          *            *

Lilith split asunder and her lifeblood poured across the sky. Millions of twinkling souls in the shape of glowing crosses escaped the dying being to plummet back to Earth. In the chaos of the swirling, fleeing ghosts, Asuka's troubled soul found someone. And her anger washed away.

They were together, and icy fear gripped Asuka's heart along with an inexplicable sense of desperate joy. Just the sight of her caused the collapse of Asuka's strong emotional barriers, exposing the fragility beneath. Before she could scream out, she had been swept into the arms of Kyoko Zeppelin Sohryu.

"M… Mama…" Asuka stammered, wide-eyed.

"My Asuka," murmured Kyoko.

"Mama… I…"

"Ssh, my Asuka," said her mother softly. "Don't say anything yet."

A terrible longing washed over Asuka and she gripped her mother tightly. She had no real eyes to speak of here, but if she did tears would have been trickling down her cheeks. It all came back to her from long ago… the way her mother felt. Her smell. Her voice. Asuka felt her mother's heart beating against her own chest.

"You must not stay here, little Asuka," Kyoko told her. "You must return to life and go back."

"I don't want to leave you, Mama…"

"It's all right, Asuka. Everything will be fine."

"Mama… why did you go away and leave me all alone?" Asuka whispered, speaking like a little child again.

"I didn't mean to, Asuka," Kyoko replied, gently stroking her daughter's hair. "I didn't mean to. I didn't want to go, but I was taken."

"I was alone, Mama," Asuka said miserably, burying her face in Kyoko's shoulder. "For so long."

"I know, Asuka. I know. Please, forgive me. I know it has been hard for you, little Asuka, but you have been very strong."

"It was hard, Mama… but… I didn't cry. I grew up fast and I didn't need anyone."

"I know. You have done very well. But there were others who needed you, Asuka." Her mother smiled gently and stroked Asuka's cheek with ghostly fingertips. "They still do."

Images appeared in Asuka's mind.

"But Mama… Misato wasn't my mother! She was just a guardian…"

"She loves you, Asuka. She cares for you."

Asuka looked away.

"Shinji will need you, my Asuka. He feels just as lonely as you do. You must take care of one another. You must be there for each other."

"Why should I look after that idiot," Asuka muttered.

Her mother laughed softly. "You must let him in, Asuka. Strength does not always come from power but from other places as well. And sometimes that strength is the type that can overcome any obstacle. Will you try, Asuka?"

Asuka gazed into her mother's eyes before closing them gently. "I… will try for you, Mama."

Kyoko held her tightly again. "I want to see you happy, Asuka. That is all I ever wanted. It was my greatest regret that I could not lead you there. Your friends… Hikari… Shinji… Misato… they will all give you happiness. But you must allow them."

Asuka nodded and held her mother's hand as they drifted apart. Kyoko smiled lovingly at her daughter.

"Ich leibe dich, Asuka."

"I… I love you too, Mama." Asuka felt a pang of sadness. "Don't go."

Still smiling, a mother's smile filled with love and kindness, Kyoko drifted further away, out of Asuka's reach. "I am so proud of you, my Asuka."

The words that Asuka had always needed hit her like an arrow in the heart. A great burden was lifted from her shoulders and for the first time, she felt free. "I did it all for you, Mama."

"As long as you continue to believe and try to understand, as long as you keep joy in your heart and hold true to hope, everything will be all right. I will always be watching you, my Asuka." She laughed one last time, a twinkle in her eye. "And there is no way that you can lose."

Asuka peacefully closed her eyes and drifted towards her fate, finally laying the ghosts of her past to rest and releasing the torment she had been carrying for her entire troubled life. She smiled at the stars overhead. "Guten nacht, Mama. Ich liebe dich."

*          *            *

"I needed to hear her voice so much," Asuka whispered. "She told me so many things that I needed to hear from her. She said… she told me that there is no way I can lose."

Shinji smiled awkwardly. "I… well, don't you think she was right about you?"

"Why Shinji… was that a compliment? Well, yeah, I do. But…" Asuka turned to look at him, azure eyes sparkling. "Winning isn't everything, is it Third Child?"

"It… isn't?" Shinji asked in surprise, not expecting this comment from the girl.

"There are more important things."

"Like what?"

Asuka snickered. "I have a few sneaking suspicions."

Shinji looked confused.

The redhead rolled her eyes and shifted position. "Shinji, if there's ever a Fourth Impact, I sure hope it knocks some sense into your head."

"What… do you mean?"

"Hey…" Asuka glanced up in surprise. "It's stopped raining. Come on, let's go outside."

"But…" Shinji was interrupted by Asuka dragging him to his feet. Other members of the group had similar ideas and after making arrangements to meet back here at the garage by a certain time, they all wandered off in twos or threes.

"Where are we going, Asuka?" Shinji asked as his companion pushed him outside the door of the auto-repair shop.

"Well, the way I figure it, nothing much is going to get done if we just sit around doing nothing but agonize over the past like you've been doing for the past hour."

"But I wasn't…"

"So let's go and see if we can find a TV or something."

"All right," Shinji said, giving in. "But will they work? I mean…"

"Well, they operate on satellite, right? We can hope, at least."

With a sly wink and a brazen smile, Asuka spun around and stamped off. "Follow me, Shinji!"

"Hey… wait up!" Shinji called, hurrying after her.

The world had changed, their lives had changed… at least for now. But things had not stopped changing – The members of SEELE, if they had returned to this earth, would be horrified. Ironically, though their sacrament of death had failed, humanity had been granted rebirth anyway, a second chance to get things right. One day, things would return to normal and Shinji and Asuka knew that they would be there to see that day.

As long as you continue to believe and try to understand, as long as you keep joy in your heart and hold true to hope, everything will be all right.

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AUTHOR'S NOTES:  You may have noticed that time in this story is passing very slowly. I mean, it's still the second day after Shinji and Asuka awoke on the beach. But that's intentional on my part; I never intended to send Shinji and Asuka back to NERV to fight some new Angels along with the (of course) newly discovered ACC Sixth Child and Eva-05. This story is just what the pair of them do upon their return. There won't be a climactic battle, I can tell you that much, but I do intend to bring back a few of the other characters very soon. I'll write about why they came back and what they do, so there might actually be a chapter without Shinji and Asuka. So, who do you think should come back? Please, send me reviews and comments (suggestions are useful too) and finally, thanks for reading this chapter.