~Chapter 26~ Ok, first of all wow. I can't believe I've gotten so many reviews and I can't believe I'm on chapter 26. And thanks to Rina who reviews on every single one of my chapters! Thanks to everyone else too! Oh yeah, I don't own anyone except Riley, and Carmen, and Daphne and Carter and Josh and Matt and Skylar, and the other people..well I don't own Dally or Soda or all those other people that you recognize!! I'll just shut up..altho it would be nice to own Dally and Soda…so yeah! Ok, here's the stupid story now. I think Im gonna end it soon, what do you guys think? Should I? And sorry if this is stupid..I'm kinda pissed right now,but I'm sure you guys don't wanna hear about that, right?
(****Riley's POV****)
I sighed. Everything was finally getting better when Soda told me that him and Sandy weren't back together, but then it just got screwed up…again. My life was always so damn screwed up. And the greasers thought that I had the perfect life, ha! "Carmen, I'm gonna go, and please, don't follow me." I said the last part almost as a command. She looked at me shocked for a minute.
"Riley. Why can't I follow you? What are you gonna do, cut yourself?" I sighed. Carm could be so damn stubborn sometimes. Especially when I didn't want her to be. It got on my nerves a lot, but she was still my best friend.
"No, Carm, I'm not. I just want to be alone. Please. You'll beable to talk to me all you want tomorrow. We have school..again." I'm glad that Soda and Dallas, don't go to school, I thought to myself miserably. Carmen looked at me like she didn't believe me. "Please Carmen, I promise I won't do anything." I knew I was promising a lie but that didn't matter to me. All I wanted was for Carmen to leave and let me be alone, by myself where I could think about Soda and my life and even Dallas Winston. As much as I hated to admit it I actually couldn't get Dallas off my mind. I couldn't get Soda off of my mind either.
"Ok Riley, but if you do anything stupid I will personally hurt you tomorrow." Carmen knew what I was thinking, as usual. "And still, don't be to stressed out about your parents, or Daphne. I know its been a day or two but I'm sure Daphne will still come back."
"Carmen, can't you see, I don't give a damn about Daphne! I don't care if she comes home or not. She's just another fuckin piece of my family. It's not my parents or Daphne that is stressing me out. Its just my life and Soda and Dally." Personally I couldn't care less whether or not Daphne came home. I just plain didn't like her. I acted like I did, but I didn't and she knew it too. Yet, she loved me and she was the only one in my family that I knew loved me.
Carmen gulped. She'd never seen me like this. "Ok. Riley, just don't do something stupid."
"Fine," I muttered and stood up. Then I walked away, closer toward the West Side, where I lived. I needed to end my life. I had nothing worth living for. I lost Soda, Dally, Daphne, and probably the rest of my friends. They probably didn't give a damn about me, like everyone else in the world.
That's when it hit me that my dad had a gun cabinet upstairs in his room. He kept it locked but I knew where the key was. Ok, so I wasn't going to kill myself by cutting but this would work too and it would probably be a lot less painful.
I would take the gun and go down to the DX. They would all have to watch and I wouldn't let anyone stop me. No one. Not Soda. Not Steve. Not Dally. Not even Carmen.
It took awhile to get home but when I did, as usual no one was there. I crept up the old victorian stair case that was lined with a red and gold carpet. Then I slowly walked down the hall and in to my Dad's room. There hitched right on the wall by two nails and a hook hung my Dad's tiny little gun cabinet. It held two guns, a shot gun and a .44 pistol. I could take the pistol and point it right at my head and then fire. Everybody would be shocked. The perfect little Riley killed herself. Yeah right, they'd probably be happy and full of joy.
I lifted my dad's sheet up off the floor a little and reached underneath the bed and grabbed a little white box. I opened it and there was a picture of me and Daphne and then the key to the gun cabinet. I stopped to look at the picture and shivered a little but then I grabbed the key and unlocked the cabinet. I pulled out the loaded .44 and locked the cabinet behind me. Tossing the white box back underneath the bed, I stormed out the door, not eager to have someone come in and start screaming at me.That would have most likely been my dad.
Once I got outside I just stopped and stared at what I had in my hands. It was .44 pistol. Was I really going to do this? Did I really want to do this? I didn't have time to answer those questions because within a minute I just started walking again, toward the East side. It was like I was someone else just watching my body do what it pleased.
The minute I got to the East Side I heard noises that seemed like screams and then I heard faint talking. "Get the hell away from me," one of the voices said.
"Oh and what are you going to do about it you lousy ass greaser?"
"Yeah, huh? I'll cut you to ribbons." Another voice said. Hey wait a minute I knew several of those voices. They sounded familiar anyway. And sure enough when I turned the corner there was four Socs surrounding Ponyboy who looked like he was scared out of his wits.
"Come on Carter, lets get him." Carter? I knew him. Then I recognized the other Socs, it was Josh, Matt, and Skylar. They were boys that I went to school with and sometimes we hung out with each other.
"Hey Ri!" Carter looked to me when he saw me, apparently he didn't notice that I was upset. "You wanna do something to this lousy hood here?" I looked to Ponyboy who was looking at me with pleading eyes and I shrugged. "Ok, then we're gonna cut him to ribbons." That's when Ponyboy threw a punch at Matt and the others just started punching him then.
"Stop it! You guys stop!" I screamed. They looked at me wide-eyed.
"Why should we?"
"Just stop it. Leave him alone, please." I walked over to Ponyboy and grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the Socs.
"I didn't know that you had a thing for greasers Riley." Skylar gave me a disgusted look.
"Shut up. And I don't. He's my friend. Now leave!" I thought about taking the gun right then and there and shooting myself, because all of these guys were judging me. But I didn't do that, Soda wouldn't be there to see it and I wanted him of all people to watch me pull the trigger. The guys looked at me like I was a carzy nut for a minute and then they left, all saying stuff about me.
"Gee Riley, you must get around a lot if you're friends with guys like this." That was one of the remarks that Carter made to me as he walked off.
"Thanks Riley." Ponyboy smiled at me a little. "You didn't have to do that." Then he looked at my hand and the gun that I was holding. "Riley..you aren't thinking about.." I cut hit off.
"No problem and I know I didn't have to do that, but I wanted too." I was ignoring his comment that he said about I wasn't thinking about, and I'm pretty sure he was going to say shooting yourself but I cut him off.
"Riley. Thank you." I turned around and there was Soda, standing there with a wild grin on his face. I looked at the ground and felt a tear well up in my eye. I could do it now. Soda would be there to see me. "Thank you for just doing what you did, I mean telling those Socs to back off of Ponyboy."
I shook my head and tears began to fall. Then I put the gun up to my head and just started crying and shaking uncontrollably. I couldn't do it. "Riley, don't" I heard Soda say and then he started walking toward me a little. That's when I dropped the gun and ran to Soda, falling in his arms. He held me tight, dropping down with me as I slid to the ground.
I was crying and I was pretty sure I had know idea what was going on. "Riley, shh, it'll be ok." Soda patted my head and pulled my hair back for me when I kept trying unsuccessfully to brush it out of my face.
"No. No. No." I reached for the gun and realized it was out of my reach.
"Riley. Calm down, everything is ok." Was it? Was everything ok? I mean here I was crying my eyes out and letting Sodapop Curtis do whatever he wanted to me. Hadn't he just said that he didn't trust me?
A/N~ Ok..thats the end of Chapter 26! What do you guys think? Good? Bad? What? I know it was really boring….but it was the best I could do..damnit theres these stupid little lines after everything I write and they won't go away!! UGH!! Anywho, what does everyone think!? Please Review!!