Nogaid Ahead
"Excuse me, but where exactly are you taking me?" asked Perry, sounding very unsure for a person who usually knew exactly what he was going to do. However, in this situation, he didn't seem to have any choice but to stick to his new found guardian.
"It's where you belong," answered Dirgah, "You'll thank me for this."
Dirgah hurried along and pulled out a tiny glass bottle out of his one small breast pocket. Perry gave Dirgah a questioning look.
"It's Alt Juice, Perry; you'll come to love it after your 3rd year- once you're allowed to use it. But don't tell the authorities that I'm letting you try some right now, I'm not supposed to, you know- but it's so much faster." Perry gave a look of disgust to the half-filled-puce-colored- bottle, took a sip, found that it tasted like caramel, and suddenly they were there seemingly moving in a strange puce-colored sweet smelling tunnel.
"Hello, Mandy, hullo Al, how are you two doing this lovely evening?" Dirgah asked a wizened (no pun intended) elderly couple. The tunnel resembled a traveling, anti-gravitational chamber tunnel, and people passed them by. The couple greeted Dirgah in response, and they went along their way.
"Umm.. Dirgah, what exactly does that caramel-tasting juice, oh yes, I forgot what it was called for a second- Alt Juice- what does Alt stand for?"
"Ah, Perry, I'm glad you asked. Alt stands for 'Alternative Lazy Transportation'- and yes, it does taste good, yes, just like caramel, doesn't it? I used to get drunk on this stuff." he trailed off.
"Why don't you read your letter now, Perry?" said Dirgah.
Perry didn't really mind, and he began reading his letter eagerly.
Dear Mr. Hotter,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Pigpinpleton, Academy of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Soon, you will be on your way to Pigpimpleton and learning wizarding stuff that you will need to know. Enclosed is a list of things you'll need to have when you arrive to Pigpimpleton. Term begins on September 12th.
~3 Cardigan: 1 red, 1 black, and 1 for formal events
~1 plain white Easy Bake Oven.
~2 pink aprons
~1 magical thimble
TEXTBOOKS
~Everyday Book of Charms, by Stefanie Boettcher
~Basic Recipes for your Easy Bake Oven, by Melinda Spellbinder
~Basic Transformation for Newbies by Theresa Cheng
~Big Book of Spells, Volume, by Theodora Hunnington
~Defense Against Nasty Curses by Aquina Aiga
Please note that Newbies are not allowed to bring their own toilet plungers.
Students are allowed to bring their pet hummingbirds, iguanas, and/or snakes. We hope to see you soon. Have a safe journey!
Sincerely,
Professor Lily Connelly
Dirgah took Perry through a long and winding dim-lighted road full of people, wizards of course, and finally they arrived at their first destination: Tognirg, the Wizarding bank. It was a small, one story shack on the corner of a busy street. Tognirg was well known as one of the best, most inconspicuous places to put money, so people flocked there by way of an underground tunnel. The bank was as secretive as Switzerland. Lights were flashing- red to stop, green to go- and people whizzed by on their toilet plungers, all in the big hurry that was the Great Highway.
The tunnel suddenly ended and they were standing right in front of Tognirg, Perry dazed and high on ALT juice, and Dirgah enjoying the warm and familiar high. They walked into the bank; hundreds of tiny purple men suddenly surrounded them. Perry looked at Dirgah confused; an unspoken question.
"Oompaloompas. Haven't you ever heard of them?" Oompaloompas were curious creatures, small, like midgets, but purple with strange multicolored hair that could be cut off and sold at outrageously high prices, for the hair of Oompaloompas were enchanted and had many uses.
"Oompa, Loompa, Oompa-dee-doo, We've got another puzzle for you!" sang the little colorful, uniformed creatures as they pranced around pulling little red wagons with stacks and stacks of bank notes to unknown destinations. Tognirg looked small from the outside, but it was enchanted, like everything else in this new world. Inside it was a huge round structure that spiraled upwards, with shiny marble floors and an elevator that took you all the way up to the 13th floor and all the way underground to the -13th. But the crowning glory of it all was the ceiling, high and painted, not by hand, of course, but by magic, and if you kept your head up, you could see how it was constantly changing; a moving picture; a movie. Unknown to Perry, this ceiling was renowned in the wizarding world, and millions of the wizarding community flocked to it every Christmastime and 4th of July, to see beautiful pictures of the Puggle world.
Dirgah spoke to the Oompaloompa in charge, a stern-looking elderly man, about Perry's money, and then whispered something to the man. Perry stood transfixed, watching the Oompaloompas in their dance/work. Dirgah then turned to Perry and frowned, worry lines appearing in his face.
"Perry, I'm so sorry. I thought that Ylile and Ames, I thought that they would have left you something for sure. But- but there's nothing." It obviously pained him to say this. "There isn't a Tunk with your name on it."
"Dirgah, I'm sure that my Aunt and Uncle will send me some money, don't worry, really." Perry was confused. Why was Dirgah so worried?
"Perry, ah, Perry, you're so innocent. How could I forget to tell you? Yer money's worthless here. Not dollars and coins, not here. You need to have Nollags, and Selckis and Tunks!" Perry looked hopelessly confused.
"Isn't there some sort of currency exchange kind of thing here?" asked Perry.
"Yes, of course, but Puggle money is worth very little here." A sigh, "It'll have to do. Your Aunt Lily and Uncle James aren't rich, you know. And you won't be, either, not where you're going. The finest wizards of the finest blood will be with you at Pigpimpleton. And more often than not, fine blood is the equivalent of a social standing and wealth. Anyway, I'm here on Pigpimpleton business, also. I have to pick up a package for Mumblefore," said Dirgah as an Oompaloompa shooed them onto a large cart made of spongy material. The spongy-ness was for sanitation purposes.
"Vault five hundred and twenty seven," said the Oompaloompa as he opened the big, dark vault door, as if the vault needed some sort of introduction.
The voice activated vault opened as the Oompaloompa started singing. Dirgah ran into the vault and stuffed a small floppy-looking package into his breast pocket.
"Now we just need to make a quick stop at the post office. Linda will be so happy to see me. We've been going out for a month now!!" squeaked Dirgah excitedly.
Dirgah and Perry reached the post office. There were thousands of cubbyholes, varying in size; small ones for small packages and short deliveries and larger ones for the opposite. This was the Grand Post Office all and any mail of the wizarding world went through here; the place was huge and just as the title suggested- grand. There were rows and rows and rows of cubbyholes, and just as the endless-ness of a library seems amazing to a youngster on his first trip, the Grand Post Office seemed infinite to Perry. No surprise there-for it really was. They picked out a medium sized cubbyhole and wrote James Potter a letter requesting some money for Perry's stay at Pigpimpleton.
Perry and Dirgah sent the letter off with a poor little hummingbird, a newbie who was struggling with his load, and went on their way. They really had to be going. Nogaid stretched out forever, and they could have spent the week there, shopping to their heart's content. Well, Dirgah could have anyway. He was really quite a sensitive and feminine man, despite his brusque manner and seemingly sophisticated manners. But Dirgah knew that he could not succumb to temptation, because he had a very strict schedule to follow, and they were already behind. They made their way to Monsieur Mclaugan's slowly and deliberately. For Perry, this was because he was completely and totally overwhelmed by the fact that his life and dreams had been completely changed in less than 24 hours and he was dazed and still a tad frightened, and for Dirgah, because he felt that the boy needed time to look around and soak in his new and seemingly permanent surroundings.
Monsieur McLaugan's Cardigans for Any Circumstance was a famous cardigan outwear store, and their friendly service to all kinds of creatures, mermaids, goblins, and wizards alike was well-known and well-respected by the majority of the magical world, except for a select few of each species who felt that they must remain totally exclusive. Cardigans were the official wear of wizards, and came in a variety of colors and styles. Dirgah and Perry wandered the store, Dirgah leading Perry, for Dirgah knew what was expected of Perry- a basic red cardigan, a basic black cardigan, and one enchanted one that seemed to alter itself for special occasions such as Christmas (Black with silver snowflakes), New Years (A dazzling array of firecrackers in a constantly changing pattern- a little tacky, really), and Valentine's Day (A sleek and suave dark pattern that would supposedly help him become attractive). Perry looked at the enchanted cardigan a little wearily.
They made their way, a little bit more worn out, carrying their shopping bags, heading for several more shops that they absolutely had to stop at.
"Folay!! Folay!! Folay!! Folay!!!" a skinny Goth boy sang out. He was standing on a street corner clapping his hands wildly to a beat unknown to anyone but himself. He placed emphasis on the very last syllable of Folay and was trying to choreograph a Latin type of dance for the two girls behind him.
"Folay. Folay. Folay. Folay." repeated the girls, unhealthily skinny and tired-looking, with dark circles beneath their eyes. Their cries of, "Folay" lacked Goth boy's explosive energy.
"NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!" Goth boy cried out several times and corrected the girls, trying very desperately to keep up with his outrageous pace. Perry and Dirgah looked at the trio, and then at each other, and with some unspoken command, they both began running at top speeds in the other direction.
They headed toward Hisrolf & Tob's to buy Perry's newbie textbooks. They found everything very easily, and went on their way.
"So, is there anything else that you need to buy?" asked Dirgah with exhaustion.
"I just need a thimble.?" replied Perry.
"Well then you want Renavillo's makers of first-rate thimbles since 1373" said Dirgah. "Why don't you go get your thimble while I go get a nice cup o' whiskey down at the pub?"
Perry entered a dark dirty looking shop. A man with fiery red hair came out with a huge pile of tiny boxes.
"Not another one!!" he cried out in complaint "Merlin's beard! It's, wait don't tell me, Perry Hotter, I was hoping to see you! Why don't you try this thimble, why that's what you need right? A thimble, yes indeed, you'll be a newbie this year! its 1 inch, made of copper with ½ an ounce of dragon blood woven into the metal."
Perry tried it on, but somehow the thimble popped off of his finger and jumped back into the box.
"Apparently not. Why don't try this one? It's made of pure gold, also 1 inch, but with the dust from a unicorn horn," said Mr. Renavillo
Perry tried on the thimble. This time thimble did not pop off, and it seemed to actually want to stay on Perry's finger. It was perfect, light, comfy, and it gave Perry a strange and sudden feeling of power. Needless to say, Perry bought the thimble. When he went outside, there was Dirgah waiting for him with a birdcage. Inside the birdcage, was a hummingbird named Giwde.
"A present," Dirgah said, and looked approvingly at the thimble Perry had chosen.
After a very long day shopping, their mouths watered at the scent of a good steak and potato meal drifting toward them through the diner window. Naturally, they couldn't resist.
"So why am I so important, anyways?" Perry tried to casually ask as they scooted into their seats at a comfortable booth table and stared at their menus.
"I knew you would ask sooner or later," said Dirgah, suddenly sounding very tired, more tired than he had ever been. He lowered his voice and looked around. Satisfied at the lack of customers at the pathetic diner (The diner was mostly empty, with a few scattered elderly witches and wizards talking to each other about old days and trying to find content in their mashed potatoes because they couldn't chew anything else.) Dirgah said the sentence that Perry had wanted to hear since before he could remember: "Well the thing is your parents were murdered, Perry. They were murdered by a man by the name of Moldesnort."
Somehow, one question led to another, and Dirgah, unaccustomed to this relentless interrogation, told Perry everything he could.
"Perry, a very long time ago, and for a very long time, everything was dark, evil. It was all because of one man, Moldesnort. Moldesnort had followers, and by god, he was powerful. Nobody likes to say his name, for it still inspires much fear. It's much easier to say, 'What's His Face," as most of us do. There is a strange side to the wizarding world. A long time ago, a mysterious curse was put upon all of us wizards. The evil in any of us can be killed by a single papercut, and none of us are completely pure people, for usually we are half evil and half good. That is the chemistry of a normal person. Now, if this chemistry is precise, as it usually is, a person becomes what we call a soul; a wandering being without a body; a half-person. But although these are tragic circumstances that make things difficult for wizards, the blood of a family relative over the age of eleven can easily save 'souls'. It is a difficult potion to make, but it has often been done, and not many are at any actual risk. Moldesnort killed many with horrible spells, including your parents. Ames was so very young and innocent, more good than evil, and so, because of this imbalance, he died of a paper cut. Ylile, your mother, was, I am sorry to say, more evil than good. She also died. Rare cases, they were."
At this point, Dirgah found it necessary to stop and wipe his eyes, for he was close friends with Ames, and had been all his life, ever since Dirgah and Ames had gone to Pigpimpleton together.
"And the strangest part was that Moldesnort always succeeded in killing once he decided on a victim. He wanted to rule the world, and for the longest time, it seemed like he was going to succeed. He set out on destroying you, Perry."
Perry looked frightened.
"But I'm still alive," he said. Actually, it was more of a whisper.
"Yes, that is the miracle of it." Dirgah leaned forward. "But the ordeal left you with that scar. The whole wizarding world knows about that scar, the one shaped like a question mark, on your rear end," Dirgah couldn't resist a giggle.
Perry looked absolutely mortified.
"But I haven't even gotten to the strangest part yet." Perry listened in, captured in the moment, lost in his newfound knowledge. "After that, Moldesnort disappeared. Many believe he became a 'soul' and he though was respected, he was despised, and even his family would not save him. Some versions of the story say that he didn't have any family, though."
They had finished their meal by then, and Dirgah paid the tab in magenta, lime green and hot pink coins. As he got up and motioned for Perry to leave and follow him out, he said, "Oh yes, and don't you ever dare mix up the names of Moldesnort and Mumblefore. Mumblefore is your friend, your headmaster, a great grand wizard, and Moldesnort is a thief and coward. Remember that, Perry, don't you ever forget it."
It was said lightly, but the influence on Perry was profound. He could not wait to meet this grand wizard who would surely explain to him everything he needed to know. He had heard them speaking of his greatness in the shops that day. But another, greater part of him was scared, for he knew that he was embarking on the most dangerous journey he ever had, and surely the strangest.
"Excuse me, but where exactly are you taking me?" asked Perry, sounding very unsure for a person who usually knew exactly what he was going to do. However, in this situation, he didn't seem to have any choice but to stick to his new found guardian.
"It's where you belong," answered Dirgah, "You'll thank me for this."
Dirgah hurried along and pulled out a tiny glass bottle out of his one small breast pocket. Perry gave Dirgah a questioning look.
"It's Alt Juice, Perry; you'll come to love it after your 3rd year- once you're allowed to use it. But don't tell the authorities that I'm letting you try some right now, I'm not supposed to, you know- but it's so much faster." Perry gave a look of disgust to the half-filled-puce-colored- bottle, took a sip, found that it tasted like caramel, and suddenly they were there seemingly moving in a strange puce-colored sweet smelling tunnel.
"Hello, Mandy, hullo Al, how are you two doing this lovely evening?" Dirgah asked a wizened (no pun intended) elderly couple. The tunnel resembled a traveling, anti-gravitational chamber tunnel, and people passed them by. The couple greeted Dirgah in response, and they went along their way.
"Umm.. Dirgah, what exactly does that caramel-tasting juice, oh yes, I forgot what it was called for a second- Alt Juice- what does Alt stand for?"
"Ah, Perry, I'm glad you asked. Alt stands for 'Alternative Lazy Transportation'- and yes, it does taste good, yes, just like caramel, doesn't it? I used to get drunk on this stuff." he trailed off.
"Why don't you read your letter now, Perry?" said Dirgah.
Perry didn't really mind, and he began reading his letter eagerly.
Dear Mr. Hotter,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Pigpinpleton, Academy of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Soon, you will be on your way to Pigpimpleton and learning wizarding stuff that you will need to know. Enclosed is a list of things you'll need to have when you arrive to Pigpimpleton. Term begins on September 12th.
~3 Cardigan: 1 red, 1 black, and 1 for formal events
~1 plain white Easy Bake Oven.
~2 pink aprons
~1 magical thimble
TEXTBOOKS
~Everyday Book of Charms, by Stefanie Boettcher
~Basic Recipes for your Easy Bake Oven, by Melinda Spellbinder
~Basic Transformation for Newbies by Theresa Cheng
~Big Book of Spells, Volume, by Theodora Hunnington
~Defense Against Nasty Curses by Aquina Aiga
Please note that Newbies are not allowed to bring their own toilet plungers.
Students are allowed to bring their pet hummingbirds, iguanas, and/or snakes. We hope to see you soon. Have a safe journey!
Sincerely,
Professor Lily Connelly
Dirgah took Perry through a long and winding dim-lighted road full of people, wizards of course, and finally they arrived at their first destination: Tognirg, the Wizarding bank. It was a small, one story shack on the corner of a busy street. Tognirg was well known as one of the best, most inconspicuous places to put money, so people flocked there by way of an underground tunnel. The bank was as secretive as Switzerland. Lights were flashing- red to stop, green to go- and people whizzed by on their toilet plungers, all in the big hurry that was the Great Highway.
The tunnel suddenly ended and they were standing right in front of Tognirg, Perry dazed and high on ALT juice, and Dirgah enjoying the warm and familiar high. They walked into the bank; hundreds of tiny purple men suddenly surrounded them. Perry looked at Dirgah confused; an unspoken question.
"Oompaloompas. Haven't you ever heard of them?" Oompaloompas were curious creatures, small, like midgets, but purple with strange multicolored hair that could be cut off and sold at outrageously high prices, for the hair of Oompaloompas were enchanted and had many uses.
"Oompa, Loompa, Oompa-dee-doo, We've got another puzzle for you!" sang the little colorful, uniformed creatures as they pranced around pulling little red wagons with stacks and stacks of bank notes to unknown destinations. Tognirg looked small from the outside, but it was enchanted, like everything else in this new world. Inside it was a huge round structure that spiraled upwards, with shiny marble floors and an elevator that took you all the way up to the 13th floor and all the way underground to the -13th. But the crowning glory of it all was the ceiling, high and painted, not by hand, of course, but by magic, and if you kept your head up, you could see how it was constantly changing; a moving picture; a movie. Unknown to Perry, this ceiling was renowned in the wizarding world, and millions of the wizarding community flocked to it every Christmastime and 4th of July, to see beautiful pictures of the Puggle world.
Dirgah spoke to the Oompaloompa in charge, a stern-looking elderly man, about Perry's money, and then whispered something to the man. Perry stood transfixed, watching the Oompaloompas in their dance/work. Dirgah then turned to Perry and frowned, worry lines appearing in his face.
"Perry, I'm so sorry. I thought that Ylile and Ames, I thought that they would have left you something for sure. But- but there's nothing." It obviously pained him to say this. "There isn't a Tunk with your name on it."
"Dirgah, I'm sure that my Aunt and Uncle will send me some money, don't worry, really." Perry was confused. Why was Dirgah so worried?
"Perry, ah, Perry, you're so innocent. How could I forget to tell you? Yer money's worthless here. Not dollars and coins, not here. You need to have Nollags, and Selckis and Tunks!" Perry looked hopelessly confused.
"Isn't there some sort of currency exchange kind of thing here?" asked Perry.
"Yes, of course, but Puggle money is worth very little here." A sigh, "It'll have to do. Your Aunt Lily and Uncle James aren't rich, you know. And you won't be, either, not where you're going. The finest wizards of the finest blood will be with you at Pigpimpleton. And more often than not, fine blood is the equivalent of a social standing and wealth. Anyway, I'm here on Pigpimpleton business, also. I have to pick up a package for Mumblefore," said Dirgah as an Oompaloompa shooed them onto a large cart made of spongy material. The spongy-ness was for sanitation purposes.
"Vault five hundred and twenty seven," said the Oompaloompa as he opened the big, dark vault door, as if the vault needed some sort of introduction.
The voice activated vault opened as the Oompaloompa started singing. Dirgah ran into the vault and stuffed a small floppy-looking package into his breast pocket.
"Now we just need to make a quick stop at the post office. Linda will be so happy to see me. We've been going out for a month now!!" squeaked Dirgah excitedly.
Dirgah and Perry reached the post office. There were thousands of cubbyholes, varying in size; small ones for small packages and short deliveries and larger ones for the opposite. This was the Grand Post Office all and any mail of the wizarding world went through here; the place was huge and just as the title suggested- grand. There were rows and rows and rows of cubbyholes, and just as the endless-ness of a library seems amazing to a youngster on his first trip, the Grand Post Office seemed infinite to Perry. No surprise there-for it really was. They picked out a medium sized cubbyhole and wrote James Potter a letter requesting some money for Perry's stay at Pigpimpleton.
Perry and Dirgah sent the letter off with a poor little hummingbird, a newbie who was struggling with his load, and went on their way. They really had to be going. Nogaid stretched out forever, and they could have spent the week there, shopping to their heart's content. Well, Dirgah could have anyway. He was really quite a sensitive and feminine man, despite his brusque manner and seemingly sophisticated manners. But Dirgah knew that he could not succumb to temptation, because he had a very strict schedule to follow, and they were already behind. They made their way to Monsieur Mclaugan's slowly and deliberately. For Perry, this was because he was completely and totally overwhelmed by the fact that his life and dreams had been completely changed in less than 24 hours and he was dazed and still a tad frightened, and for Dirgah, because he felt that the boy needed time to look around and soak in his new and seemingly permanent surroundings.
Monsieur McLaugan's Cardigans for Any Circumstance was a famous cardigan outwear store, and their friendly service to all kinds of creatures, mermaids, goblins, and wizards alike was well-known and well-respected by the majority of the magical world, except for a select few of each species who felt that they must remain totally exclusive. Cardigans were the official wear of wizards, and came in a variety of colors and styles. Dirgah and Perry wandered the store, Dirgah leading Perry, for Dirgah knew what was expected of Perry- a basic red cardigan, a basic black cardigan, and one enchanted one that seemed to alter itself for special occasions such as Christmas (Black with silver snowflakes), New Years (A dazzling array of firecrackers in a constantly changing pattern- a little tacky, really), and Valentine's Day (A sleek and suave dark pattern that would supposedly help him become attractive). Perry looked at the enchanted cardigan a little wearily.
They made their way, a little bit more worn out, carrying their shopping bags, heading for several more shops that they absolutely had to stop at.
"Folay!! Folay!! Folay!! Folay!!!" a skinny Goth boy sang out. He was standing on a street corner clapping his hands wildly to a beat unknown to anyone but himself. He placed emphasis on the very last syllable of Folay and was trying to choreograph a Latin type of dance for the two girls behind him.
"Folay. Folay. Folay. Folay." repeated the girls, unhealthily skinny and tired-looking, with dark circles beneath their eyes. Their cries of, "Folay" lacked Goth boy's explosive energy.
"NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!" Goth boy cried out several times and corrected the girls, trying very desperately to keep up with his outrageous pace. Perry and Dirgah looked at the trio, and then at each other, and with some unspoken command, they both began running at top speeds in the other direction.
They headed toward Hisrolf & Tob's to buy Perry's newbie textbooks. They found everything very easily, and went on their way.
"So, is there anything else that you need to buy?" asked Dirgah with exhaustion.
"I just need a thimble.?" replied Perry.
"Well then you want Renavillo's makers of first-rate thimbles since 1373" said Dirgah. "Why don't you go get your thimble while I go get a nice cup o' whiskey down at the pub?"
Perry entered a dark dirty looking shop. A man with fiery red hair came out with a huge pile of tiny boxes.
"Not another one!!" he cried out in complaint "Merlin's beard! It's, wait don't tell me, Perry Hotter, I was hoping to see you! Why don't you try this thimble, why that's what you need right? A thimble, yes indeed, you'll be a newbie this year! its 1 inch, made of copper with ½ an ounce of dragon blood woven into the metal."
Perry tried it on, but somehow the thimble popped off of his finger and jumped back into the box.
"Apparently not. Why don't try this one? It's made of pure gold, also 1 inch, but with the dust from a unicorn horn," said Mr. Renavillo
Perry tried on the thimble. This time thimble did not pop off, and it seemed to actually want to stay on Perry's finger. It was perfect, light, comfy, and it gave Perry a strange and sudden feeling of power. Needless to say, Perry bought the thimble. When he went outside, there was Dirgah waiting for him with a birdcage. Inside the birdcage, was a hummingbird named Giwde.
"A present," Dirgah said, and looked approvingly at the thimble Perry had chosen.
After a very long day shopping, their mouths watered at the scent of a good steak and potato meal drifting toward them through the diner window. Naturally, they couldn't resist.
"So why am I so important, anyways?" Perry tried to casually ask as they scooted into their seats at a comfortable booth table and stared at their menus.
"I knew you would ask sooner or later," said Dirgah, suddenly sounding very tired, more tired than he had ever been. He lowered his voice and looked around. Satisfied at the lack of customers at the pathetic diner (The diner was mostly empty, with a few scattered elderly witches and wizards talking to each other about old days and trying to find content in their mashed potatoes because they couldn't chew anything else.) Dirgah said the sentence that Perry had wanted to hear since before he could remember: "Well the thing is your parents were murdered, Perry. They were murdered by a man by the name of Moldesnort."
Somehow, one question led to another, and Dirgah, unaccustomed to this relentless interrogation, told Perry everything he could.
"Perry, a very long time ago, and for a very long time, everything was dark, evil. It was all because of one man, Moldesnort. Moldesnort had followers, and by god, he was powerful. Nobody likes to say his name, for it still inspires much fear. It's much easier to say, 'What's His Face," as most of us do. There is a strange side to the wizarding world. A long time ago, a mysterious curse was put upon all of us wizards. The evil in any of us can be killed by a single papercut, and none of us are completely pure people, for usually we are half evil and half good. That is the chemistry of a normal person. Now, if this chemistry is precise, as it usually is, a person becomes what we call a soul; a wandering being without a body; a half-person. But although these are tragic circumstances that make things difficult for wizards, the blood of a family relative over the age of eleven can easily save 'souls'. It is a difficult potion to make, but it has often been done, and not many are at any actual risk. Moldesnort killed many with horrible spells, including your parents. Ames was so very young and innocent, more good than evil, and so, because of this imbalance, he died of a paper cut. Ylile, your mother, was, I am sorry to say, more evil than good. She also died. Rare cases, they were."
At this point, Dirgah found it necessary to stop and wipe his eyes, for he was close friends with Ames, and had been all his life, ever since Dirgah and Ames had gone to Pigpimpleton together.
"And the strangest part was that Moldesnort always succeeded in killing once he decided on a victim. He wanted to rule the world, and for the longest time, it seemed like he was going to succeed. He set out on destroying you, Perry."
Perry looked frightened.
"But I'm still alive," he said. Actually, it was more of a whisper.
"Yes, that is the miracle of it." Dirgah leaned forward. "But the ordeal left you with that scar. The whole wizarding world knows about that scar, the one shaped like a question mark, on your rear end," Dirgah couldn't resist a giggle.
Perry looked absolutely mortified.
"But I haven't even gotten to the strangest part yet." Perry listened in, captured in the moment, lost in his newfound knowledge. "After that, Moldesnort disappeared. Many believe he became a 'soul' and he though was respected, he was despised, and even his family would not save him. Some versions of the story say that he didn't have any family, though."
They had finished their meal by then, and Dirgah paid the tab in magenta, lime green and hot pink coins. As he got up and motioned for Perry to leave and follow him out, he said, "Oh yes, and don't you ever dare mix up the names of Moldesnort and Mumblefore. Mumblefore is your friend, your headmaster, a great grand wizard, and Moldesnort is a thief and coward. Remember that, Perry, don't you ever forget it."
It was said lightly, but the influence on Perry was profound. He could not wait to meet this grand wizard who would surely explain to him everything he needed to know. He had heard them speaking of his greatness in the shops that day. But another, greater part of him was scared, for he knew that he was embarking on the most dangerous journey he ever had, and surely the strangest.