My first author's note. Heh, well, I just want to take a minute to thank you if you've read this far. If you enjoy the series, please leave me some feedback in reviews, or email me at CASAO@hacked-xbox.com, I'm intrested in what you have to say. Anyway, a bit about where this is taking place. The story starts around the 12th angel, the one with the Sea of Driac inside of it. Shinji has been absorbed into it, and after he should've died, he finds himself back in Nerv. However, it's a different reality, where Rei is his sister, his mother wasn't the test pilot for Unit-01, and... oh yes, he was killed during the activation experiment. There's also a difference in the normal world. The 13th Angel, Unit-03, comes before Shinji was absorbed, though Touji was still the pilot. Just thought I'd mention this, so the episode makes a bit more sense. Thanks again for reading, and please give me feedback.
Shinji is eating lunch with her. Again. It was now a daily thing, he and Hikari would sit together and have lunch, all smiles and cheerful. After school, they would walk to one of their houses, and once they were inside, their smiles would disappear and they'd talk about serious things. Mostly they would talk about Touji.
"How did you and Touji first meet Hikari?"
"Well, back in the third grade, I was very shy. We had play time every day, and I would sit down in a corner and play with a toy. And every day, this big kid came over and demanded I give him the toy. And I always did, because I didn't want to get in trouble for not sharing. Anyway, one day, I brought my favorite toy, and the kid comes over. He tells me to give him the toy, and I say 'No'. The kid gets angry, and kicks me. Touji sees this, comes over and pushes the kid down."
"So he was your knight in shining armor?"
"What?"
"It's a western thing, they used to have Knights, sort of like Samurai, and there would be fair maidens being bullied by monsters and robbers and things like that. Then, a knight would come along, a very heroic knight, dressed in shining silver armor with a sharp sword and he would vanquish the dragon or slay the robbers."
"Yes, that's what it was like. Exactly. A knight in shining armor..."
"So that's when you fell in love with him?" Hikaro Blushes.
"Yes..."
"That's a great story."
"Tell me Shinji, did you ever love anyone?"
"Well..."
"C'mon Shinji, I've sat here and talked about Touji for weeks now, and you've never said a thing about yourself. You must've fallen in love at some point."
"To tell the truth... I have. She was beautiful, an intelligent, and she stood up for herself. She was perfect."
"You're talking in past tense, what happened?"
"Well... she was in my old home, and when I... left, I guess that's as good a word as any, when I left, I had to leave her."
"Surely you've called her."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"I... I can't explain why not. I just can't."
"What was her name?"
"Asuka."
Gendo watches his son come home from school, late again. He wonders where the boy has been going, but doesn't ask.
"Shinji, I need to talk to you."
"Yes?"
"We need you to be the designated pilot of Unit-01."
"Why? What about Touji?"
"As you know, he's disappeared into the Sea."
"Yes, but you're going to retrieve him."
"No, we're not."
"Wha... what do you mean?"
"The commander has decided that expending the effort and funds to retrieve a pilot when we have a suitable replacement is illogical. We won't be retrieving him."
"What if I refuse to pilot?"
"Then we will select another child."
"That could take months."
"No Shinji, it won't."
"What? Why not?"
"We have a list of suitable candidates."
"Then let one of them pilot it."
"We'd prefer you Shinji, you have a synch ratio beyond anything we've seen before."
"I won't do it."
"Please Shinji, please consider it. I don't want to have to hurt one of your new friends."
"What do you mean?"
"Just consider piloting it. Please Shinji." Shinji walks into his room, slams the door and puts on his SDAT. He drifts into a fitful sleep.
Hikari sees Shinji sitting at a table, and she heads over toward him. He sees her and waves her off. She looks upset and goes to find an empty seat. She sits next to Rei.
"What's up with Shinji?"
"What do you mean?"
"He just waved me away. He's sitting over there all alone, it's not like him."
"Oh... he's been that way since he had a talk with dad last night. Dunno what they talked about, but Shinji went into his room, slammed the door, and didn't come out. When I woke up my lunch was on the table, and he had left."
"I wonder what they talked about. It's not like Shinji to be upset like this. Maybe I should help him."
"No, it's not. Why are you so intrested?"
"Well, we're really good friends. And he's helped me alot, I want to repay the favor."
"Is that all?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, are you intrested in him?"
"Intrested? Wha.... oh. OH. No, I'm not. We're really good friends, that's all. Besides, he's intrested in someone else."
"What? Who?"
"I dunno, someone from his old town. Said her name was... what was it now... Asuka? That sounds right. Do you know her?"
"mmmm No."
"Hmmm... I'm gonna try to talk to him later. Thanks."
"No problem." Hikari walks away. 'Heh, nice try, but I saw the jealousy in your eyes when you mentioned his crush. You want him...'
Shinji is walking home when he hears someone running behind him. He turns and sees Hikari coming up behind him. He keeps walking like he doesn't see her.
"Shinji. Shinji! Wait, Shinji! Why won't you talk to me Shinji?" Shinji stops.
"I'm sorry Hikari, but I just can't talk to you right now."
"Why not? What did I do?"
"Nothing, you did nothing. Don't worry, I'm just...."
"Rei told me about the fight you had with your dad. What happened?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Tough Shinji. You were there for me, and I want to be there for you."
"You don't understand Hikari. You CAN'T understand."
"Why NOT?"
"It's just... you can't understand."
"I can't if you don't tell me."
"I can't tell you. I just can't. Maybe someday I'll be able to, but right now, I can't." Shinji starts walking again.
"Ok... I'll be here if you need me." Hikari turns around and walks back to her house.
"Thank you... "
Rei knocks on Shinji's door. There's no answer. She knocks again, but again no reply. She knocks a third time, and gets a grunt as a reply.
"Shinji, open the door. I want to talk to you."
"Go away."
"Shinji, please, open the door. I want to talk to you."
"Well I don't want to talk to you. GO AWAY."
"Shinji, I'm not going to go away, so you either open this door or I'll open it myself." The door opens and Shinji is standing there.
"What."
"Shinji, you look like crap."
"Hello to you too. Come in. Or don't, whatever." She steps inside and takes a seat.
"I'm sorry, but you look.. you just look awful. What's wrong Shinji?"
"It's nothing you could understand."
"Try me."
"No."
"Shinji, if you don't talk about it, you won't feel better."
"I don't want to talk. I just want it all to go away. I thought this world would be better. No more fights, no more angels. Nothing."
"What makes you think we wouldn't have angels?"
"I don't know, it felt right. And I wouldn't be piloting anymore, there wouldn't be any more pain."
"So? Why is there pain?"
"Because... they want me to pilot."
"That's great! You could pilot Unit-03 with me an-"
"Not 03. 01."
"But that's Touji's Eva."
"Not anymore... nothing is Touji's anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"Touji's not coming back."
"What do you mean?" Shinji stares at her for a minute. "Oh... OH! Who told you?"
"Dad. He told me Fuyutski decided I will pilot 01 instead. That I will be a better pilot."
"But... but what about Touji?"
"He said I was a suitable replacement, and they won't expend the time or effort to retrieve him."
"But... but why?"
"I don't know. I don't want to accept it either. But I have to."
"Why?"
"Because if I don't pilot, someone else will. Someone I know. Dad told me that."
"He can't know... the Marduk Report-"
"is fake. It's a hoax. Nerv controls the children. They know who's a candidate and who isn't."
"That... that can't be true. Nerv doesn't have that kind of power."
"Rei, you pilot a 25 story biomechanical robot. I think they have any kind of power they need."
"I... I can't believe that."
"It's the truth. Now, if you just want to argue about it, please leave. I need to get my rest." Rei walks out and closes the door behind her.
Shinji tosses and turns, trying to find restful sleep, but it is eluding him. Finally, he picks up the phone and dials a number. There are some rings, then a groggy voice answers.
"Hello?"
"Hikari? I... I need to talk to you."
"Shinji? What is it?"
"Well... I need to talk to you in person. Can I come over?"
"Ummm... yeah, come over. I'll be waiting."
"Ok. Hikari?"
"Yeah?"
"I have... just, just... never mind, I'll tell you when I get over there."
"Ok."
Shinji is eating lunch with her. Again. It was now a daily thing, he and Hikari would sit together and have lunch, all smiles and cheerful. After school, they would walk to one of their houses, and once they were inside, their smiles would disappear and they'd talk about serious things. Mostly they would talk about Touji.
"How did you and Touji first meet Hikari?"
"Well, back in the third grade, I was very shy. We had play time every day, and I would sit down in a corner and play with a toy. And every day, this big kid came over and demanded I give him the toy. And I always did, because I didn't want to get in trouble for not sharing. Anyway, one day, I brought my favorite toy, and the kid comes over. He tells me to give him the toy, and I say 'No'. The kid gets angry, and kicks me. Touji sees this, comes over and pushes the kid down."
"So he was your knight in shining armor?"
"What?"
"It's a western thing, they used to have Knights, sort of like Samurai, and there would be fair maidens being bullied by monsters and robbers and things like that. Then, a knight would come along, a very heroic knight, dressed in shining silver armor with a sharp sword and he would vanquish the dragon or slay the robbers."
"Yes, that's what it was like. Exactly. A knight in shining armor..."
"So that's when you fell in love with him?" Hikaro Blushes.
"Yes..."
"That's a great story."
"Tell me Shinji, did you ever love anyone?"
"Well..."
"C'mon Shinji, I've sat here and talked about Touji for weeks now, and you've never said a thing about yourself. You must've fallen in love at some point."
"To tell the truth... I have. She was beautiful, an intelligent, and she stood up for herself. She was perfect."
"You're talking in past tense, what happened?"
"Well... she was in my old home, and when I... left, I guess that's as good a word as any, when I left, I had to leave her."
"Surely you've called her."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"I... I can't explain why not. I just can't."
"What was her name?"
"Asuka."
Gendo watches his son come home from school, late again. He wonders where the boy has been going, but doesn't ask.
"Shinji, I need to talk to you."
"Yes?"
"We need you to be the designated pilot of Unit-01."
"Why? What about Touji?"
"As you know, he's disappeared into the Sea."
"Yes, but you're going to retrieve him."
"No, we're not."
"Wha... what do you mean?"
"The commander has decided that expending the effort and funds to retrieve a pilot when we have a suitable replacement is illogical. We won't be retrieving him."
"What if I refuse to pilot?"
"Then we will select another child."
"That could take months."
"No Shinji, it won't."
"What? Why not?"
"We have a list of suitable candidates."
"Then let one of them pilot it."
"We'd prefer you Shinji, you have a synch ratio beyond anything we've seen before."
"I won't do it."
"Please Shinji, please consider it. I don't want to have to hurt one of your new friends."
"What do you mean?"
"Just consider piloting it. Please Shinji." Shinji walks into his room, slams the door and puts on his SDAT. He drifts into a fitful sleep.
Hikari sees Shinji sitting at a table, and she heads over toward him. He sees her and waves her off. She looks upset and goes to find an empty seat. She sits next to Rei.
"What's up with Shinji?"
"What do you mean?"
"He just waved me away. He's sitting over there all alone, it's not like him."
"Oh... he's been that way since he had a talk with dad last night. Dunno what they talked about, but Shinji went into his room, slammed the door, and didn't come out. When I woke up my lunch was on the table, and he had left."
"I wonder what they talked about. It's not like Shinji to be upset like this. Maybe I should help him."
"No, it's not. Why are you so intrested?"
"Well, we're really good friends. And he's helped me alot, I want to repay the favor."
"Is that all?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, are you intrested in him?"
"Intrested? Wha.... oh. OH. No, I'm not. We're really good friends, that's all. Besides, he's intrested in someone else."
"What? Who?"
"I dunno, someone from his old town. Said her name was... what was it now... Asuka? That sounds right. Do you know her?"
"mmmm No."
"Hmmm... I'm gonna try to talk to him later. Thanks."
"No problem." Hikari walks away. 'Heh, nice try, but I saw the jealousy in your eyes when you mentioned his crush. You want him...'
Shinji is walking home when he hears someone running behind him. He turns and sees Hikari coming up behind him. He keeps walking like he doesn't see her.
"Shinji. Shinji! Wait, Shinji! Why won't you talk to me Shinji?" Shinji stops.
"I'm sorry Hikari, but I just can't talk to you right now."
"Why not? What did I do?"
"Nothing, you did nothing. Don't worry, I'm just...."
"Rei told me about the fight you had with your dad. What happened?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Tough Shinji. You were there for me, and I want to be there for you."
"You don't understand Hikari. You CAN'T understand."
"Why NOT?"
"It's just... you can't understand."
"I can't if you don't tell me."
"I can't tell you. I just can't. Maybe someday I'll be able to, but right now, I can't." Shinji starts walking again.
"Ok... I'll be here if you need me." Hikari turns around and walks back to her house.
"Thank you... "
Rei knocks on Shinji's door. There's no answer. She knocks again, but again no reply. She knocks a third time, and gets a grunt as a reply.
"Shinji, open the door. I want to talk to you."
"Go away."
"Shinji, please, open the door. I want to talk to you."
"Well I don't want to talk to you. GO AWAY."
"Shinji, I'm not going to go away, so you either open this door or I'll open it myself." The door opens and Shinji is standing there.
"What."
"Shinji, you look like crap."
"Hello to you too. Come in. Or don't, whatever." She steps inside and takes a seat.
"I'm sorry, but you look.. you just look awful. What's wrong Shinji?"
"It's nothing you could understand."
"Try me."
"No."
"Shinji, if you don't talk about it, you won't feel better."
"I don't want to talk. I just want it all to go away. I thought this world would be better. No more fights, no more angels. Nothing."
"What makes you think we wouldn't have angels?"
"I don't know, it felt right. And I wouldn't be piloting anymore, there wouldn't be any more pain."
"So? Why is there pain?"
"Because... they want me to pilot."
"That's great! You could pilot Unit-03 with me an-"
"Not 03. 01."
"But that's Touji's Eva."
"Not anymore... nothing is Touji's anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"Touji's not coming back."
"What do you mean?" Shinji stares at her for a minute. "Oh... OH! Who told you?"
"Dad. He told me Fuyutski decided I will pilot 01 instead. That I will be a better pilot."
"But... but what about Touji?"
"He said I was a suitable replacement, and they won't expend the time or effort to retrieve him."
"But... but why?"
"I don't know. I don't want to accept it either. But I have to."
"Why?"
"Because if I don't pilot, someone else will. Someone I know. Dad told me that."
"He can't know... the Marduk Report-"
"is fake. It's a hoax. Nerv controls the children. They know who's a candidate and who isn't."
"That... that can't be true. Nerv doesn't have that kind of power."
"Rei, you pilot a 25 story biomechanical robot. I think they have any kind of power they need."
"I... I can't believe that."
"It's the truth. Now, if you just want to argue about it, please leave. I need to get my rest." Rei walks out and closes the door behind her.
Shinji tosses and turns, trying to find restful sleep, but it is eluding him. Finally, he picks up the phone and dials a number. There are some rings, then a groggy voice answers.
"Hello?"
"Hikari? I... I need to talk to you."
"Shinji? What is it?"
"Well... I need to talk to you in person. Can I come over?"
"Ummm... yeah, come over. I'll be waiting."
"Ok. Hikari?"
"Yeah?"
"I have... just, just... never mind, I'll tell you when I get over there."
"Ok."