Title:  A Sweet Blossoming

Author:  Yih

Written:  February 2002/ March 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp. 

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7: Faded Flower

"Everything," Yue responded.  "I want to talk about everything." 

"Everything is rather a dense subject," answered Eriol with an amused smile, "perhaps you might be a little more specific.  Is it about why I'm here all of sudden?  Or is it because of your feelings with Sakura, the love you have for her?  Maybe it's something else, maybe it's the jealousy and envy in your heart?  Come now, Yue, you use to tell me everything, didn't you once?" 

Yue turned away from Eriol, giving him his back deliberately.  "That was when you were a different person," Yue retorted.  "You aren't quite the same anymore." 

"Oh, but that's not what you said when you first recognized me again.  You said I was 'Clow Reed'.  I felt truly that was the most wondrous compliment anyone had ever spoken to me.  And to come from the lips of my beloved Yue was even more satisfying.  And I will answer the questions I know that you won't ask.  Why am I here?  It's a good thing I did come, since you nearly jumped to your death.  In ways Yue, I care for you even more than I did as Clow Reed.  I've seen the way you've grown with Sakura and it's made me very happy," he murmured, reaching out to trace his fingers down Yue's cheek.  "But in ways it pains me since somehow Sakura has carved a place for herself in my heart. 
"I'm not quite sure when she began to enthuse her way into my soul, but she did so in the same way she did to you.  Unintentionally, infinitely forever," he whispered softly, "and it's a marvelous feeling isn't it, Yue?  To be in love with such a fervor that I know is thumping, beating, and coursing through your heart and veins right now.  I'm feeling it myself.  I know you're jealous of the one Sakura holds dearest and also envious of him, but I feel that those emotions are turning toward me.  And I've always been on your side, Yue." 

The moon guardian's breathing picked up as Eriol's finger touched his lips.  He jerked his face away from the reincarnation of Clow Reed and bowed his head down, saying hoarsely, "I cannot believe you are on my side when you are here to claim Sakura for your very own.  How can I believe it when Ruby and Spinel are here to assist you in the endeavor?  You said so yourself when you saved me from my release that you were here for Sakura and that you love her for your very own!  How am I believe you are on my side when you want to take away what I hold dearest in my heart?" 

"Are you on my side?" 

"Yes," Yue murmured under his breath.

"That's how I'm on your side," Eriol said softly, framing his hands around Yue's face to lift it up.  "That's why I'm on your side.  Even now, you cannot hate me when you need to hate me.  It would make things so much easier on you Yue if you'd just hate me a little, as you said earlier and which I don't think you really mean, you said I'm not the same person as Clow Reed.  That I am different.  Would that make it easier for you to feel some dislike toward me if that was so?"

"No," Yue choked out, "no, it would not.  Because as you said yourself, I didn't really mean it.  And you knew it as well.  But I love her, Eriol, I love her so much, Clow Reed.  I love her so much it makes me ache to feel the pain that still resides within her soul.  I know it's still there and I'd do anything if I could to erase it.   But I can't anymore.  I can't go back anymore especially when he never knew--- he never knew.  He saw someone else instead." 

"Yes," agreed Eriol, "he saw someone else that he wanted more than life itself.  And when he knew that he could not receive the love he gave so freely, it destroyed him.  He was a beautiful soul, sweet and trusting.  In ways, he was quite like the Yue you never show Sakura.  If only you'd show it, I'd not stand a chance with Sakura.  You know better than anyone what you hide within you." 

Walking up and down the length of the room, Yue turned and turned around Eriol.  He was restless with nervous energy and the blossoming of hope within him once again.  He wanted to curse Eriol for giving him such a hope, when he was going to crush it later.  He believed Eriol was on his side, and it didn't pain him to realize that his friend, once his mentor and master was now his rival for the affection of the one he loved so dearly.  And it did hurt him if he thought too hard on it.  But whatever he did, he was not able to hate Eriol, and he did try.  He wasn't even able to dislike Ruby, however irritating and annoying she was. 

"You sent Ruby to try to make me dislike her with her annoying ability to push all my wrong buttons?" asked Yue suddenly.  "You sent her to push me over the edge, but why?" he inquired, standing face to face, eye to eyes with Eriol.  "Why did you do that?" 

"I thought it'd make thinks easier on you," Eriol remarked.  "I guess my assumptions and guesses aren't quite like they use to be.  It's not like I can see into the future anymore.  I gave that up quite a while back.  If you were able to dislike Ruby for a second, maybe you might be able to dislike me as well.  But I misjudged that incorrectly.  She did spur you into a bit of violence though.  I've never seen you quite like that.  Some of things that she said were quite cruel on her part, and I don't quite agree with them either.  Though she did do her job rather admirably especially when I told her without clear instructions to rile you up." 

"So you were watching all through it?"

"Yes, but I never expected that Sakura was going to come out when she did or how Ruby was going to interact.  But the look on her face Yue.  She cares for you.  If she only looked that way at me, I'd never leave her side again.  I don't think I stand much of a chance against you.  Rather you yourself stand the greatest menace to your chance with Sakura.  I only want you to be happy Yue.  It's true that I want nothing more than to be with Sakura, but I'm not one to deny destiny.  I foresaw and foretold your fate with Sakura in my lifetime ago.  And I want you both to be happy.  My creation and my prodigy, who wouldn't?" 

Yue slumped down, crumbling to his knees while Eriol wrapped his arms around the moon guardian's shoulders.  Eriol hugged him tightly and whispered into his ears, "I believe that Sakura might just love you as much as she loved him.  But you don't believe it, that's why you hesitate, isn't it?  You don't believe she can care that deeply for you.  I don't think you want to believe it.  You like being almost safe in your utter adoration of her and your obsessive love.  It gives you a haven, a sort of heaven to escape to.  If she doesn't deny you, you can live in your fantasy forever, can't you?

"That's why I'm here.  If you don't want to make the step to claim her for yourself.  I'll do it.  I'll make her mine, but with regrets because she was suppose to be yours." 

"I haven't seen Eriol-kun in the longest time!" exclaimed Tomoyo.  "I wonder what he looks like now," she wondered with stars in her eyes causing Touya to elbow her affectionately, "but I'm sure that you're ten times more heavenly than he is now." 

"Only ten times?" he remarked, sounding aggrieved.  "I thought you once said to me that I was at least one hundred times more good-looking than any guy you'd seen." 

"Oh, well Eriol's different," Tomoyo explained, "he's a sorcerer like Sakura, so he gets bonus points.  That reminds me, Sakura, how do you really feel about me and Touya dating and all?  I mean I'd like nothing--- we'd like nothing more than for you to be utterly supportive of our relationship.  You are such an important person to both of us.  We never did quite finish that happy greeting before." 

Sakura beamed at both of them.  "Why wouldn't I be?  I was a bit astonished though in the beginning, but I thought I reacted in a positive fashion." 

"You did," Tomoyo and Touya replied in unison. 

"I always suspected that you had a crush on Touya," Sakura declared, winking at her best friend.  "But I never thought it lasted this long.  I first thought you had a crush on him when we were ten years old!  That was nearly ten years ago!  Time does seem to fly by since we finally caught all the Clow Cards, then going through Judgment, and then finally meeting Eriol and transforming them into the Sakura Cards, huh?" 

"Yes, it does," agreed Tomoyo.  

"So," Sakura began, "did you ask him out or did he ask you out?"

Tomoyo blushed prettily.  "I asked your niichan out."  She gazed seductively at Touya.  "He's quite shy about it."

Reaching over to tickle her, he growled affectionately, kissing her on the nose.  "She's lying actually, imouto.  We actually tried to ask each other out at the same time," he remembered.  "It was very confusing.  We didn't quite get what the other was saying because I think we were both too nervous about what we were actually saying to comprehend what the other person was saying." 

She shook her head vigorously.  "I knew all along what he was saying," she declared to Sakura.  "I was too overjoyed to respond to his question so he explained it again.  Then I yelled at him, 'I'm asking you out too!'  Your niichan blushes quite prettily, Sakura.  I wish I could have gotten it on video," she reflected regretfully.  "It was quite a moment.  But I remember it as if it were yesterday." 

"As do I, so if you ever forget I can remind you," Touya teased.  "I hope you wouldn't since it's also our anniversary day." 

"I might once in a while," she joked seriously before Touya pulled her over to him and kissed her firmly on the lips. 

"You will not forget," he commanded. 

"I will."

He kissed her again.  "You will not."

"I will not." 

Sakura turned her head away from the affectionate display, unbeknownst to them.  She looked out the window where the flower petals fell.  He loves me.  She continued watching as more petals fell.  He loves me not.  All she saw were the petals falling.  He loves me.  All the petals seemed to be falling.  He loves me not.  And another petal fell.  He loves me.  The flower was almost barren now.  He loves me not.  The last petal fell.  He loves me. 

"Sakura?" asked Tomoyo worriedly. 

But Sakura was lost in her own vision of falling flower petals. 

"He loves me not." 

Author's Note:  Please Review that would mean a lot to me.  Reviews really have slacked off and it kind of makes me thing no one wants to read this anymore.  Anyways, enjoy this edition.  ^-^ and I'll see you next time depending when I get my allotted reviews before writing again.  Ja ne!  And leave an email in your review if you want to join the mailing list.