Ok, here is chappy 3...oh and by the way it is really hard to write
Roger...so please don't flame! Ok, enjoy!!!!
Marks Pov:
"Roger just kept getting worse and worse...oh God- how couldn't I notice it- I could have saved him! Why? SHIT - God couldn't you give me a warning?!? Why does it have to be my fault again- just like Collins, I couldn't have noticed that he was getting worse, but I only notice it when he's sick- or-or even dead!"
"Roger doesn't even speak to me now. He is so messed up with returning bad memories of April- and now Mimi; he won't even try to understand that I'm trying to help him. I hate my life! Nobody cares about me, about what I think. The only reason people come to see me is so I can give them advice and make their lives better. I need someone to do that for me! They- they jus think that my life is perfect- that I would never need counseling- well they, they're all wrong!"
"I need to talk to him- I need him to talk to me. Roger please- pl-please forgive me for everything. Oh God, I love you! OK DO YOU HEAR ME?!? I love you!" "Oh God- last week, last week was bad. God- I can't believe it finally happened. I knew- I knew it was eventually going to happen- but yet it seemed so unreal. God, I remember seeing Roger just laying on the couch- he looked worse than Mimi did that Christmas Eve! His whole body was shaking- and he was so pale, oh God, so pale, his eyes, they were bloodshot, he said that he couldn't feel his feet, his arms, chest- his whole body was numb. I needed help...but nobody- nobody was here- Maureen, Joanne? They were in LA- Coll- Collins was dead. There was no one! I just needed one more person- just one more! So, I went upstairs- to Mimi's old apartment...I knew someone new just moved in. I knew was young- around 21- Vicky, Vicky was- is her name. I just knocked on her door- I don't know why I went to her, I just did. She took one glance at my face and knew something had happened to Roger."
"She knew about Roger because she had met him at our neighbor, Sissy's, Easter Party. She saw him take an AZT- so she knew. She said she went to one year of nursing school and dropped out- she decided she wanted to be a painter. Now, I don't know how you could find that you want to be a painter from nursing school- but somehow, she did."
"She ran by my side down the stairs, into the main hallway, around the corner, and into our apartment. She was so concerned! I've never seen her so worried- ever! And, somehow she had this connection to Roger; it was amazing- I don't know how she had it, I mean- they weren't dating or anything. It just seemed like she knew him for such a long time- like as long as be, but truthfully she had just met him about two weeks before this had happened."
"We just wrapped him up in about 10 blankets, and carried him. How did I not notice how thin he was getting? I mean- I did, but he always said that he just had been working out. How'd he hide being so damn sick? I don't get it. I could have helped him. Does he want to die?"
"We brought him in her car to the hospital, thank God she has a car...I don't know how I would have gotten him there in time if she didn't. It took about 20 min. to get there, he was getting sicker by the minute! I hated seeing him like this- it was worse than seeing him suffer through a withdrawal- even thought that was horrible too."
"They took him right away- they knew he was dying! Jeez, he looked terrible. So sick- oh just so sick. I just wanted to hug him tight and tell him that it'll be all right. But- they wouldn't let me stay in the room. They told me they were going to try their best and I could see him later. His face- his face was so scared as they took him away. It was like a little boy being taken away from his home. I think he even reached out for me. I held back the tears as long as I could- it was so hard. But after they just took him away, they just fled down my face...after that it was like a river- I couldn't control it. Vicky was crying too- we just held each other. It was so painful to see him like that- and that could have been my last time seeing him."
"I can't do this again!"
Marks Pov:
"Roger just kept getting worse and worse...oh God- how couldn't I notice it- I could have saved him! Why? SHIT - God couldn't you give me a warning?!? Why does it have to be my fault again- just like Collins, I couldn't have noticed that he was getting worse, but I only notice it when he's sick- or-or even dead!"
"Roger doesn't even speak to me now. He is so messed up with returning bad memories of April- and now Mimi; he won't even try to understand that I'm trying to help him. I hate my life! Nobody cares about me, about what I think. The only reason people come to see me is so I can give them advice and make their lives better. I need someone to do that for me! They- they jus think that my life is perfect- that I would never need counseling- well they, they're all wrong!"
"I need to talk to him- I need him to talk to me. Roger please- pl-please forgive me for everything. Oh God, I love you! OK DO YOU HEAR ME?!? I love you!" "Oh God- last week, last week was bad. God- I can't believe it finally happened. I knew- I knew it was eventually going to happen- but yet it seemed so unreal. God, I remember seeing Roger just laying on the couch- he looked worse than Mimi did that Christmas Eve! His whole body was shaking- and he was so pale, oh God, so pale, his eyes, they were bloodshot, he said that he couldn't feel his feet, his arms, chest- his whole body was numb. I needed help...but nobody- nobody was here- Maureen, Joanne? They were in LA- Coll- Collins was dead. There was no one! I just needed one more person- just one more! So, I went upstairs- to Mimi's old apartment...I knew someone new just moved in. I knew was young- around 21- Vicky, Vicky was- is her name. I just knocked on her door- I don't know why I went to her, I just did. She took one glance at my face and knew something had happened to Roger."
"She knew about Roger because she had met him at our neighbor, Sissy's, Easter Party. She saw him take an AZT- so she knew. She said she went to one year of nursing school and dropped out- she decided she wanted to be a painter. Now, I don't know how you could find that you want to be a painter from nursing school- but somehow, she did."
"She ran by my side down the stairs, into the main hallway, around the corner, and into our apartment. She was so concerned! I've never seen her so worried- ever! And, somehow she had this connection to Roger; it was amazing- I don't know how she had it, I mean- they weren't dating or anything. It just seemed like she knew him for such a long time- like as long as be, but truthfully she had just met him about two weeks before this had happened."
"We just wrapped him up in about 10 blankets, and carried him. How did I not notice how thin he was getting? I mean- I did, but he always said that he just had been working out. How'd he hide being so damn sick? I don't get it. I could have helped him. Does he want to die?"
"We brought him in her car to the hospital, thank God she has a car...I don't know how I would have gotten him there in time if she didn't. It took about 20 min. to get there, he was getting sicker by the minute! I hated seeing him like this- it was worse than seeing him suffer through a withdrawal- even thought that was horrible too."
"They took him right away- they knew he was dying! Jeez, he looked terrible. So sick- oh just so sick. I just wanted to hug him tight and tell him that it'll be all right. But- they wouldn't let me stay in the room. They told me they were going to try their best and I could see him later. His face- his face was so scared as they took him away. It was like a little boy being taken away from his home. I think he even reached out for me. I held back the tears as long as I could- it was so hard. But after they just took him away, they just fled down my face...after that it was like a river- I couldn't control it. Vicky was crying too- we just held each other. It was so painful to see him like that- and that could have been my last time seeing him."
"I can't do this again!"