What About Me?
Prologue
Warnings: slight angst
Pairings: former 1x2, 1xR
Notes: You'll see about the 1xR. Everyone knows I'm a dedicated 1x2 fan at heart. :)
***
March 14, AC 200
The worst day of my life.
The day my life changed. Forever.
Heero got married that day. And it wasn't to me.
I remember exactly what I was doing when he told me the news. I was putting together a scrapbook. I was so happy. We'd been together for almost four years, ever since the end of the second Eve war.
He just walked into the doorway and announced we were no longer a couple, and that he was marrying Relena. Sorry Duo, you were a good screw, but now I've gotta go marry a rich bitch and become King of the World, so I'll see ya around, okay?
And then he turned away and walked out of my life. I just sat there, on the carpet, in our--no, my-- apartment, photo's scattered around me. I remember the photos... I could see my reflection in their glossy surfaces, but I couldn't realize I who I was. I was in a fog.
I didn't know how long I sat there in a stupor. Pretty long I guess, because it was early morning when Heero took off for greener pastures, and it was dusk by the time a concerned Quatre's face appeared in my vision. The expression on my face must have scared him, because he simply pulled me against him in what should have been a warm, comforting hug. But I was too numb. I remember just staring at the wall. I had idly noticed it needed a new layer of paint.
"Duo?" Quatre pulled back to look into my face. "Are you okay?" he asked gently.
I blinked at him. I felt lost; I think he could see that on my face. "I don't know, Quatre," I answered softly, and Quatre knew it was serious, because I never called him by his whole name. He was always 'Q' or 'Quat' to me.
"No, I'm not okay."
I just sort of existed through the next couple of weeks. Quatre took my sorry ass back to the house he and Trowa shared. The two really have become my best friends, which is odd, considering I never thought of Trowa as someone who could be very close to me. Yet they are, perhaps because they helped me through one of the most difficult times of my life. I can talk to them about anything now.
Not back then, though. They were careful not to mention Heero, Relena, or anything of the like around me. However, they couldn't help it when the letter came in the mail.
'Duo. You're invited to my wedding. Hope to see you there.
-Heero'
I was just angry. I vaguely recall mumbling something to the effect of, "Yuy, you fucking bastard!" and charging upstairs to my room. Poor Quatre. He didn't understand what was going on, until he read the note that had fallen from my hand in the doorway. By the time he reached my room, I had flung out every scrapbook containing his picture and ripped them all to shreds. Quatre stood quietly and allowed my rage, and when I sunk to the floor, my anger spent, he came over and hugged me gently.
But I didn't cry. I just sort of sat there and breathed on Quatre's shoulder. Later, when I was seated at the kitchen table, hot tea placed in front of me, Trowa came in, sat down, and quietly asked it I wanted to talk about it. It was amazing, because I just spilled everything. Quatre left the room, understanding. It was weird. I hadn't wanted to discuss it with Quatre, but with Trowa I was more comfortable. And vice versa. When I needed a hug or comforting, I went to Quatre, not Trowa. It must be their personalities; Trowa's so quiet and a natural listener, and Quatre knows how you feel.
I ended up going to the wedding. I came in quietly through the doors. No one noticed me, and that was how I wanted it. I watched the ceremony, left right before it ended. I didn't want to see the kiss. That was when my loss really hit me hard. There was no way Heero was coming back to me now.
A couple days later I went to Lady Une with an idea. "I'll go to L2," I said, "and keep a lookout for anti-peace gangs there." Lady Une was thrilled. After the war, L2 got worse instead of better. Those resenting the new peace flocked there and made trouble. Police force on L2 was already non-existent, and L2 deteriorated into a terrorists idea of heaven. Lady Une's other officers, former Gundam pilots not included, were all too chicken to stay on L2 long. It didn't bother me. I lived on L2 most of my life, and I could keep from seeing Heero at work. It was a perfect arrangement for everybody.
I had to fly myself. Nobody went to L2 unless they had to, and no one certainly decided to go live there unless they were desperate, so no commercial shuttles visited there. Once there, I started looking for a place to live that wasn't a shack, dump, whorehouse, or other establishment of that type. When I found the country house, I almost died of shock. It was far away from the city, located near Nowhere, which is an actual little town in L2. (I really need to persuade them to get a new name.) The people there aren't at all like your typical L2-ians. It's... nice. And the house kicks ass.
First of all, it's huge. Rambling's the best word for it, really. It's full of big windows and high ceilings and staircases and the secret passage or two. The rooms are all big and airy and for L2, it's quite the unusual find. Normally, you're lucky if you find four walls and a roof.
So far things have been quiet. So quiet, I needed something else to pass the time with, so I wouldn't think about Heero. I'm good at mechanics, so I started tinkering with the townspeople's cars. I was so good, they persuaded me to open a little shop. It makes a good income, plus I enjoy it. The one downside is it's too much work to run alone, and paperwork's a bitch. I hate paperwork. But Hilde loves it. And thus, you have met my partner in crime.
She makes the day's easier at least, even if she is as annoying as the yappy little dog next door. The stupid thing yips at 3 in the morning. [3] I'll have to remember never to get a dog. All they do is slobber, eat, and piss and crap on your floor.
Hilde's a little like Quatre actually, only she understands my pain because she went through it herself, when her girlfriend dumped her a few years ago. Yeah, Hilde's a lesbian. Well, actually, she's bi- she's got the most horrible crush on Trowa. She knows better than to go after him though, since Quatre would probably go zero on her ass if she touched his boyfriend.
Anyway, my life on L2 is -- surprisingly -- great. So why the hell am I going back to bad memories on Earth?
***
[1]- based on the actual little dog next door. ^_^
Prologue
Warnings: slight angst
Pairings: former 1x2, 1xR
Notes: You'll see about the 1xR. Everyone knows I'm a dedicated 1x2 fan at heart. :)
***
March 14, AC 200
The worst day of my life.
The day my life changed. Forever.
Heero got married that day. And it wasn't to me.
I remember exactly what I was doing when he told me the news. I was putting together a scrapbook. I was so happy. We'd been together for almost four years, ever since the end of the second Eve war.
He just walked into the doorway and announced we were no longer a couple, and that he was marrying Relena. Sorry Duo, you were a good screw, but now I've gotta go marry a rich bitch and become King of the World, so I'll see ya around, okay?
And then he turned away and walked out of my life. I just sat there, on the carpet, in our--no, my-- apartment, photo's scattered around me. I remember the photos... I could see my reflection in their glossy surfaces, but I couldn't realize I who I was. I was in a fog.
I didn't know how long I sat there in a stupor. Pretty long I guess, because it was early morning when Heero took off for greener pastures, and it was dusk by the time a concerned Quatre's face appeared in my vision. The expression on my face must have scared him, because he simply pulled me against him in what should have been a warm, comforting hug. But I was too numb. I remember just staring at the wall. I had idly noticed it needed a new layer of paint.
"Duo?" Quatre pulled back to look into my face. "Are you okay?" he asked gently.
I blinked at him. I felt lost; I think he could see that on my face. "I don't know, Quatre," I answered softly, and Quatre knew it was serious, because I never called him by his whole name. He was always 'Q' or 'Quat' to me.
"No, I'm not okay."
I just sort of existed through the next couple of weeks. Quatre took my sorry ass back to the house he and Trowa shared. The two really have become my best friends, which is odd, considering I never thought of Trowa as someone who could be very close to me. Yet they are, perhaps because they helped me through one of the most difficult times of my life. I can talk to them about anything now.
Not back then, though. They were careful not to mention Heero, Relena, or anything of the like around me. However, they couldn't help it when the letter came in the mail.
'Duo. You're invited to my wedding. Hope to see you there.
-Heero'
I was just angry. I vaguely recall mumbling something to the effect of, "Yuy, you fucking bastard!" and charging upstairs to my room. Poor Quatre. He didn't understand what was going on, until he read the note that had fallen from my hand in the doorway. By the time he reached my room, I had flung out every scrapbook containing his picture and ripped them all to shreds. Quatre stood quietly and allowed my rage, and when I sunk to the floor, my anger spent, he came over and hugged me gently.
But I didn't cry. I just sort of sat there and breathed on Quatre's shoulder. Later, when I was seated at the kitchen table, hot tea placed in front of me, Trowa came in, sat down, and quietly asked it I wanted to talk about it. It was amazing, because I just spilled everything. Quatre left the room, understanding. It was weird. I hadn't wanted to discuss it with Quatre, but with Trowa I was more comfortable. And vice versa. When I needed a hug or comforting, I went to Quatre, not Trowa. It must be their personalities; Trowa's so quiet and a natural listener, and Quatre knows how you feel.
I ended up going to the wedding. I came in quietly through the doors. No one noticed me, and that was how I wanted it. I watched the ceremony, left right before it ended. I didn't want to see the kiss. That was when my loss really hit me hard. There was no way Heero was coming back to me now.
A couple days later I went to Lady Une with an idea. "I'll go to L2," I said, "and keep a lookout for anti-peace gangs there." Lady Une was thrilled. After the war, L2 got worse instead of better. Those resenting the new peace flocked there and made trouble. Police force on L2 was already non-existent, and L2 deteriorated into a terrorists idea of heaven. Lady Une's other officers, former Gundam pilots not included, were all too chicken to stay on L2 long. It didn't bother me. I lived on L2 most of my life, and I could keep from seeing Heero at work. It was a perfect arrangement for everybody.
I had to fly myself. Nobody went to L2 unless they had to, and no one certainly decided to go live there unless they were desperate, so no commercial shuttles visited there. Once there, I started looking for a place to live that wasn't a shack, dump, whorehouse, or other establishment of that type. When I found the country house, I almost died of shock. It was far away from the city, located near Nowhere, which is an actual little town in L2. (I really need to persuade them to get a new name.) The people there aren't at all like your typical L2-ians. It's... nice. And the house kicks ass.
First of all, it's huge. Rambling's the best word for it, really. It's full of big windows and high ceilings and staircases and the secret passage or two. The rooms are all big and airy and for L2, it's quite the unusual find. Normally, you're lucky if you find four walls and a roof.
So far things have been quiet. So quiet, I needed something else to pass the time with, so I wouldn't think about Heero. I'm good at mechanics, so I started tinkering with the townspeople's cars. I was so good, they persuaded me to open a little shop. It makes a good income, plus I enjoy it. The one downside is it's too much work to run alone, and paperwork's a bitch. I hate paperwork. But Hilde loves it. And thus, you have met my partner in crime.
She makes the day's easier at least, even if she is as annoying as the yappy little dog next door. The stupid thing yips at 3 in the morning. [3] I'll have to remember never to get a dog. All they do is slobber, eat, and piss and crap on your floor.
Hilde's a little like Quatre actually, only she understands my pain because she went through it herself, when her girlfriend dumped her a few years ago. Yeah, Hilde's a lesbian. Well, actually, she's bi- she's got the most horrible crush on Trowa. She knows better than to go after him though, since Quatre would probably go zero on her ass if she touched his boyfriend.
Anyway, my life on L2 is -- surprisingly -- great. So why the hell am I going back to bad memories on Earth?
***
[1]- based on the actual little dog next door. ^_^